I Am The Cute One

Latest Episodes:

TGIF 8/9/24: Tampon Tim, RHONJ Hot Takes, Tik Tok Drama, and Sh*tting Our Brains Out! Aug 09, 2024

Show notes

Chelsea may not feel like the Cute One tonight, but Donny can’t stop looking at himself. In a week full of stomach bugs, missed recordings, and Chelsea and Donny hanging out in Baltimore, we were also graced with Zac Efron’s health scare, Tampon Tim as the Vice President nominee, and an “Auntie Anne’s” scented perfume. Also, Chelsea is obsessed with TikTok drama and Donny Donny can’t get enough of this season of “Real Housewives of New Jersey.” Can your twin be your parent?

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TikTok: @cuteonepodcast

Chelsea: @ohnochels

Donny: @realdonnywood

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The Witches w/ Dara Laine Sussman (The Cuties Love Their Incest Birds!) Aug 05, 2024

Show notes

This week, the Cute Ones recap “The Witches,” a movie that defined Chelsea’s personality and inspired her tramp stamp, with Dara Laine Sussman. Roald Dahl’s books are for little freaks, and Donny, Chelsea, and Dara prove they fit right in with their stories of hamster haircuts, parakeet mating rituals, British mice, and Philadelphia’s Disney vault. The trio also perform an in-depth analysis on the heavy crotch work in this film, and Chelsea unlocks a vault of her own to reveal something none of us knew we were missing: Pepe.

If you want to hear more of Dara, she has a brand new show with Troy McEady called "What's Your Issue?" (Go support them!)

This episode originally aired in June of 2022

To hear (or watch) this recap in its unedited, unhinged entirety, head to our Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/iamthecuteone

Chelsea: @ohnochels

Donny: @realdonnywood

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TGIF 8/2/24: Defending JD Vance, Trolling Candace Cameron Bure, Celebrating the Olympics, and B*tches Are Spiraling! Aug 02, 2024

Show notes

Happy August, Cuties! Donny’s had a rough day (or six months), but nothing could have prepared him for the questions he was asked at the Ludacris concert. Meanwhile, Chelsea and Dr. Bald have officially become disciples (not for Jesus, but for Julie Chen, so… pretty close). Besides that big news, Ashley Tisdale has gone platinum, Carrie Bradshaw and St. Louise reunited in Paris, and JD Vance fxcked a couch (LEAVE HIM ALONE!) Also, the Olympics is war propaganda.

If today's episode makes you laugh or scream, please do us a favor and rate our show 5 STARS on Apple or Spotify This is the easiest way for us to grow our community!

We’re on YOUTUBE! Be sure to subscribe so you don’t miss a second of our hijinx - now on video!

TikTok: @cuteonepodcast

Chelsea: @ohnochels

Donny: @realdonnywood

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The Other Sister (The Cuties Take an Elevator to Hell!) Jul 29, 2024

Show notes

Please rise for the National Anthem! The 1st Annual Morally Corrupt Month has officially come to an end with recap of a movie Roger Ebert had A LOT to say about, "The Other Sister."

After offending the un-footed community, Chelsea remembers she's a grown up and describes the out of shape ghoul haunting her neighborhood. Meanwhile, Donny's former flings may not be alive, but his current lovers ARE patriotic... just stay away from the ones wearing yellow shirts.

So sh*t on a stick, remember to get your kids out of a baking car, and buckle up, Cuties! This episode is a one way ticket to Hell. After all, the Cute Ones are pro-sweatshops, anti-orphans, and still on the hunt for gay listeners.

#SAVETHEPODCAST - and subscribe to our patreon!!!

If today's episode makes you laugh or scream, please do us a favor and rate our show 5 STARS on Apple or Spotify This is the easiest way for us to grow our community!

We’re on YOUTUBE! Be sure to subscribe so you don’t miss a second of our hijinx - now on video!

TikTok: @cuteonepodcast

Chelsea: @ohnochels

Donny: @realdonnywood

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TGIF 7/26/24: Big Brother Tea, Pissing Off Trixie Mattel Fans, and a New Vocal Stim! Jul 26, 2024

Show notes

Chelsea and Donny may busy being empathetic, trolling Trixie Mattel's fans and getting thicker cvm, but besides that, Donny worked the Big Brother 26 premiere party and Chelsea survived the Microsoft crash. Once they're finished talking about themselves, they discuss Jojo Siwa, the I Know What You Did Last Summer reboot, chickens laying yummy yummy bread, and the 20th Anniversary "re-release" of Ashlee Simpson's Autobiography album (you can keep the re-release, but give us a tour!)

Thanks to today’s sponsor, Green Chef! Head to Greenchef.com/cuteone50 and use code CUTEONE50 to get 50%, plus 20% off your next two months!

If today's episode makes you laugh or scream, please do us a favor and rate our show 5 STARS on Apple or Spotify This is the easiest way for us to grow our community!

We’re on YOUTUBE! Be sure to subscribe so you don’t miss a second of our hijinx - now on video!

TikTok: @cuteonepodcast

Chelsea: @ohnochels

Donny: @realdonnywood

Support the show

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I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry (The Cuties Get Dunked On!) Jul 22, 2024

Show notes

Thanks to today’s sponsor, Green Chef! Head to Greenchef.com/cuteone50 and use code CUTEONE50 to get 50%, plus 20% off your next two months!

Austin Butler didn’t win the Oscar for Elvis, Connie Britton looks like a dried up cinnamon stick, Nicholas Cage trains crows, and Helen Keller may not have been real (if you ask Gen Z). The Cute Ones discuss those hot topics, as well as twins making out, different ways to work the system, and the best Chelsea’s ever looked. Also, straight men are so annoying and there's no carnival games at basketball games. (Send this podcast to your favorite gay!)

If today's episode makes you laugh or scream, please do us a favor and rate our show 5 STARS on Apple or Spotify This is the easiest way for us to grow our community!

We’re on YOUTUBE! Be sure to subscribe so you don’t miss a second of our hijinx - now on video!

TikTok: @cuteonepodcast

Chelsea: @ohnochels

Donny: @realdonnywood

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TGIF 7/19/24: Rude AF Celebrity Encounters, Lindsay Hubbard's Pregnancy Tour, and Witchcraft! Jul 19, 2024

Show notes

Chelsea is back from sequestering and surviving a ferry accident, and Donny is still healing from being mistreated by one of his (former) favorite actresses, but they are still here to cover this week’s hottest headlines. Kind of. Donny made his debut on The Daily Mail, and Lindsay Hubbard’s pregnancy resulted in an advertisement and an early eviction from The Traitors. With Donny coming into his witch powers, Chelsea decides to use it to her advantage (watch out, He Who Must Not Be Named!)

If today's episode makes you laugh or scream, please do us a favor and rate our show 5 STARS on Apple or Spotify This is the easiest way for us to grow our community!

We’re on YOUTUBE! Be sure to subscribe so you don’t miss a second of our hijinx - now on video!

TikTok: @cuteonepodcast

Chelsea: @ohnochels

Donny: @realdonnywood

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Shallow Hal (The Cuties Flick Their Butt Flaps!) Jul 15, 2024

Show notes

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TGIF 7/12/24: How YOU Doin???? (Unsolicited, Unqualified Advice!) Jul 12, 2024

Show notes

If you thought Chelsea and Donny weren’t equipped to discuss movies or current events, well - you're right, but you ain’t seen nothing yet. Because today they’re really all in, and tackling… unsolicited advice! You sent in your questions, Cuties, and Donny and Chelsea are helping out. Well - kind of.

If today's episode makes you laugh or scream, please do us a favor and rate our show 5 STARS onApple or Spotify This is the easiest way for us to grow our community!

We’re on YOUTUBE! Be sure to subscribe so you don’t miss a second of our hijinx - now on video!

TikTok: @cuteonepodcast

Chelsea: @ohnochels

Donny: @realdonnywood

Support the show

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Never Been Kissed w/ Christine Biancavilla (The Cuties Take Mono Shots!) Jul 08, 2024

Show notes

Chelsea and Donny couldn't celebrate Morally Corrupt Month without featuring THEE most morally corrupt movie of all time: Never Been Kissed. Relive this episode with Christine Biancavilla as the Cute Ones discuss the best SNL casts, Dunkin Donuts parking lots, a cancellable statement about Gen Z, and the power of "No Scrubs."

(This episode originally aired February 6, 2022.)

If today's episode makes you laugh or scream, please do us a favor and rate our show 5 STARS on Apple or Spotify This is the easiest way for us to grow our community!

We’re on YOUTUBE! Be sure to subscribe so you don’t miss a second of our hijinx - now on video!

TikTok: @cuteonepodcast

Chelsea: @ohnochels

Donny: @realdonnywood

Support the show

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices