Therapy Works

Latest Episodes:

Dr Rachel Clarke on NHS challenges and finding meaning in end of life care Apr 10, 2024

Show notes

In this week’s episode of the Therapy Works podcast, Dr. Rachel Clarke shares her journey through the peaks of the COVID-19 pandemic, her transition from journalism to palliative care medicine, and her ongoing advocacy for better end-of-life care. Reflecting on the paradox of human existence—the intertwining of love, death, and the essence of being—she discusses the daily challenges within the NHS, the psychological cost of providing care in an overburdened system, and the deeply personal impact of her father's passing.

Key Points Discussed:

Navigating NHS Challenges: Rachel details the struggle of providing compassionate care during Covid and emphasises the psychological toll it had on her and the healthcare professionals she knows.
Personal Growth Through Adversity: She reflects on her path from philosophy to medicine, highlighting how facing death and vulnerability has shaped her perspective on life and her practice in palliative care. For someone that’s confronted by death so often, hearing Rachel’s perspective on death, and outlook on life, is enlightening.
The Power of Human Connection: Rachel shares insights on the significance of sincerity and presence in the face of mortality, underscoring the importance of embracing life's dualities. When we are on our deathbeds, we don’t regret not sending more emails or earning more money. What matters to us most is the connections we have.
Legacy and Advocacy: Through her books and involvement in healthcare debates, she advocates for systemic change, particularly in palliative care, driven by her experiences and the profound lessons learned from the dying.

This episode underscores the importance of compassion, resilience, and the pursuit of meaning amidst life's greatest challenges.

If you’d like to know more about Dr Rachel Clarke’s experience, you can find her book “Breath taking” on Amazon - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Breathtaking-UKs-human-story-Covid/dp/0349144567/

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Agony Aunties: Finding purpose after children leave home Apr 05, 2024

Show notes

In this week’s episode of "Agony Aunties," our discussion focuses on a parent finding their purpose as their children have grow up and left home. And so, we’ll talk about the importance of starting with self-awareness and exploration, and how mindfulness can help, along with small steps towards activities that bring joy or spark curiosity. On a broader scope, we’ll also talk about a concept that we’ve covered a few times already - the fertile void - where we transition from the end of one major undertaking to another. And we’ll also mention the importance of self-compassion at this time, and how it might be useful to look for inspiration from others' paths.

Resources:

Here’s more from Kristin Neff: https://self-compassion.org

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Lily Pickard on the healing powers of humour and community Apr 03, 2024

Show notes

In this week’s episode of Therapy Works, Lily Pickard shares her heart-wrenching journey through her husband Cole's terminal cancer diagnosis, the emotional upheaval it brought to their family, and the profound loss felt after his passing. She discusses the importance of hope, humour, and community support in navigating such a devastating experience, offering insights into the complexities of grief, parenting through loss, the importance of a dog’s love, and finding resilience in the face of unimaginable sorrow.

Key Points Discussed:

The Shock of Diagnosis: Lily recounts the initial turmoil following Cole's unexpected cancer diagnosis, emphasising the drastic change it brought to their lives.

Navigating Treatment and Embracing Hope: Despite the grim prognosis, Lily and Cole's determination to explore every possible treatment option highlights their unwavering hope and the lengths they went to fight the disease.

The Role of Humour and Community: The discussion underlines the therapeutic power of laughter and the significant role of a supportive community in coping with the challenges faced during Cole's illness.

Grieving and Moving Forward: Lily reflects on the grieving process, the impact of loss on their son Ethan, and the ways in which they've sought to honour Cole's memory and legacy.

This episode is a poignant reminder of the strength found in love, the healing power of community, and the importance of facing grief with hope and dignity. It offers a compassionate perspective on dealing with terminal illness and loss within a family, providing comfort and understanding to those navigating similar paths.

Resources:

For single parents and their children, check out Gingerbread - https://www.gingerbread.org.uk

Child Bereavement UK which helps children, parents and families rebuild their lives when a child grieves - https://www.childbereavementuk.org

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Agony Aunties: Parenting an unmotivated child Mar 29, 2024

Show notes

In this week’s episode of Agony Aunties, we’ll be addressing a concern from parents about their son's lack of motivation. We’ll explore the challenges of transitioning to adulthood and suggest the approach of trying to understand his perspective rather than pushing him, as pushing him might not offer the results you’re looking for.

Our conversation also touches on how the parents can support each other and accept their children's journey and the extended maturation process of the younger generation. For a more detailed exploration of the topic and additional insights, you might find Jeffrey Arnett's work on Emerging Adulthood, including his TED talk and book, particularly enlightening, offering a broader understanding of the challenges faced by young adults today.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fv8KpQY0m6o

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Kirsty Young on embracing vulnerability and recognising the value of imperfection Mar 27, 2024

Show notes

In this very special episode of Therapy Works, I have the pleasure of sitting down in-person with the remarkable Kirsty Young, a beloved figure in Scottish television and radio. Renowned for presenting the iconic show Desert Island Discs and her role in hosting prestigious events such as the Queen's jubilee and funeral, Kirsty brings a wealth of wisdom and insight to our conversation.

Key Discussion Points:

Childhood Influences: Kirsty opens up about the formative experiences of her childhood, shedding light on feelings of abandonment and inadequacy that have shaped her journey.
Career Drive and Coping with Stress: We delve into Kirsty's innate drive for success and how she navigates high-stress periods, finding balance amidst the demands of her career.
Embracing Imperfection: Kirsty shares her perspective on prioritising the present moment over the pursuit of perfection, finding joy in embracing life's imperfections and uncertainties.
Confronting Anxiety and Vulnerability: With refreshing candour, Kirsty discusses her childhood battle with anxiety.
Lessons in Growth: Through her own health journey, Kirsty offers profound insights into the power of self-compassion and acceptance. She emphasises the importance of embracing imperfection and finding liberation in simply being.

Join us as Kirsty Young shares her journey of growth, resilience, and self-discovery, offering invaluable insights into embracing imperfection and finding strength in vulnerability.

Resource Mentions:

Rachel Yehuda: A notable figure in the field of psychology, known for her work on intergenerational trauma and the role of epigenetics. Please find her study here: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6127768/
Highly Sensitive People Project: Explore this initiative dedicated to understanding and supporting highly sensitive individuals at HSPerson.com.
On Being Podcast: Dive into thought-provoking discussions on spirituality, ethics, and humanity with the On Being podcast, available at OnBeing.org.
Kirsty's Podcast: Immerse yourself in Kirsty's captivating voice and engaging conversations on her podcast, click the link below: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/young-again/id1708924395

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Agony Aunties: The ex factor Mar 22, 2024

Show notes

In this episode of "Agony Aunties," we’re responding to a listener's question about maintaining a relationship with their son's ex-girlfriend. While it’s understandable to want to maintain a connection with someone that you personally don’t have any issues with, and while we don’t know all of the ins and outs of the situation, what arises in us is the importance to be aware of the complexity of such dynamics post-breakup, to consider the son's feelings, and to be aware of the the potential for confusion on the ex's part.

We’ll be expanding on these ideas in the episode, so give it a listen, and if you have any questions of your own, please send them in to jsamuelpod@gmail.com.

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Petrina Barber on living with a stoma and defying all odds Mar 20, 2024

Show notes

In this week’s episode, I’ll be delving into Petrina Barber's harrowing journey with cancer, diagnosed shortly after the birth of her son. Petrina shares the complexities of her battle, not just with the disease itself but also with the incurable condition that arose from her treatment, drastically impacting her and her family’s life. While Petrina lost a sense of autonomy over her body and acknowledges the profound losses it brought, she has been able to show such tremendous strength, and physically accomplish what no doctor thought possible. In doing so - she is redefining what is possible for people with stomas.

Key Points Discussed:

•⁠ ⁠The Initial Shock: Petrina's “perfect” life was upended with a cancer diagnosis at a young age, changing everything she knew and planned for her abd her family's future.

•⁠ ⁠Treatment and its Aftermath: The severe side effects of cancer treatment led to the development of Pelvic Radiation Disease (PRD), significantly altering Petrina's life quality and leading to numerous medical emergencies.

•⁠ ⁠Advocacy and Self-Care: Learning to advocate for herself and focusing on the quality of life became Petrina's priority, shifting from a survival mindset to one of living fully despite the circumstances. What Petrina has been able to achieve in the face of all of her health challenges, is incredibly impressive.

•⁠ ⁠Strength and Resilience: Despite numerous challenges, Petrina's story is a testament to human resilience, the power of family support, and the importance of finding joy and purpose even in the face of life-altering adversity.

Petrina's narrative is a touching reminder of the unpredictable nature of life, the strength found in vulnerability, and the power of hope and relentless love in navigating the most challenging moments. This episode illuminates the deep impact of health crises on personal identity, family dynamics, and the journey toward finding new meaning and strength amidst loss.

This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self.

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BONUS: Julia and her daughters discuss Charles Spencer's interview Mar 15, 2024

Show notes

For this week’s episode of the Therapy Works podcast, we released a very important conversation with Charles Spencer, where he opens up about his experience of childhood sexual abuse in boarding school. In this bonus episode, the three of us talk about our takeaways from that conversation, and what really resonated in us when we heard Charles’ story.

Key Points Discussed:

Complexity of Disclosure: They explore the difficulties victims face in disclosing abuse, especially sexual abuse, due to societal disbelief and the inherent shame tied to these experiences.
Impact of Abuse on Identity and Relationships: The dialogue delves into the effects of abuse on self-perception, the struggle with shame, and the obstacles to forming intimate and trustworthy relationships.
Navigating the Healing Process: The importance of therapy, acknowledging one’s experiences, and finding a narrative to differentiate the past from the present are emphasised as crucial steps towards recovery.
The Role of Acknowledgment in Healing: The power of acknowledging harm done, either through direct conversation or letters, as a pivotal step for both victims and perpetrators towards addressing intergenerational trauma.

For more information, please visit the National Child Traumatic Stress Network - https://www.nctsn.org

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Charles Spencer on speaking out about his experience of child sexual and physical abuse Mar 13, 2024

Show notes

In this episode, I’m speaking with Charles Spencer, who shares his traumatic experiences at a boarding school where he faced physical, emotional, and sexual abuse. Charles discusses the profound impact these childhood experiences have had on his life, the complex process of healing, and the importance of speaking out to help others.

Key Points Discussed:

Enduring Abuse: Charles recounts the harrowing abuse he endured during his time at a particularly abusive boarding school, including sexual abuse, and the lasting impact on his mental health.
The Healing Journey: The conversation delves into Charles's extensive journey through therapy, including EMDR, and the role of writing his book as a form of therapy.
Impact of Trauma: Charles reflects on how the trauma influenced his views on trust, relationships, and self-worth, emphasising the importance of working through past pain for personal growth.
Advocacy for Change: Highlighting the importance of advocating for the protection of children and raising awareness about the long-term effects of abuse, Charles discusses his hope that his story will inspire others to seek help and speak out.

This episode offers hope and solidarity to others who have experienced similar traumas. Charles Spencer's openness provides valuable insights into the complexities of healing from childhood abuse and underscores the power of vulnerability and truth in overcoming the shadows of the past.

Buy Charles's book: https://amzn.eu/d/8KndO4s

Follow Charles on X: @cspencer1508

Follow Charles on Instagram: @charles.earl.spencer

Watch the full podcast episode on Julia's Youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCX3RmDaV8ZzsLuQzsi-4hAA

A big thank you to our wonderful sponsor Window Fleur. Please head to their website and use the code THERAPYWORKS15 for 15% off your first order: https://windowfleur.com/

Produced by Rutherford Productions

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Agony Aunties: Navigating life's unexpected turns Mar 08, 2024

Show notes

For this week’s episode of Agony Aunties, we’re taking a bit of a different direction. While I do much prefer to answer your questions, and to connect with what’s alive in you, this week I’m going to share something that has happened to me. Namely, I am currently going through a series of health challenges. I broke my shoulder in a fall, and needed a couple of surgeries for it. On top of that, I have a rare condition called Ramsay Hunt Syndrome, the symptoms of which have flared up and paralysed half of my face, and this is affecting the way I look and speak. I thought it might be odd if I just appeared on video without explaining what happened, as I do look and sound different than before.

However, while I do appreciate the kindness and support I have received from so many of you already, I don’t want the focus of my content to be on me and this situation I’m in. I’m very motivated by the work that I’m doing, by these talks that I’m having, and these stories that I’m sharing. And I also find great meaning in sharing this work with you, and in the community that we’re all developing. I am going to continue doing what I find most meaningful. Thank you. Next week we’ll get back to answering your questions again, so do please continue to send them in.

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