On Attachment

Latest Episodes:

#112: When Your Partner Doesn't Want to Do The Work Sep 26, 2023

Show notes

In today's episode, we're talking about what to do when your partner doesn't want to work on the relationship. This is an incredibly common dynamic, to have one partner who wants to actively work on things and another partner who is more resistant (which can often overlap with anxious-avoidant dynamics).
We'll cover:

why your partner might be feeling resistant to doing "the work"
how different people make meaning out of needing to work on a relationship
ways to dismantle fear stories your partner might have
why it's entirely valid to value growth in a partnership

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Additional Resources

Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here
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Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
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#111: The Pillars of Trust & Trustworthiness Sep 21, 2023

Show notes

In today's episode, we're talking all about trust & trustworthiness. Trust is something that many people struggle with, oftentimes as a direct result of past experiences where trust has been breached. And as we'll discuss in today's conversation, trust is about so much more than honesty. My hope is that you'll walk away from today's episode with greater clarity about why you might struggle with trust, and the steps you can take to remediate this in your relationships.
We'll cover:

the interplay between trust and trustworthiness
the five pillars of trust
how self-trust and relational trust are connected
building trust through small acts over time

Click here for my Building Trust masterclass 💻

Highlighted Links

Additional Resources

Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here
Join my email list 💌
Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
Visit my website

#110: What Healthy Interdependency Looks Like & How to Cultivate It Sep 19, 2023

Show notes

In today's episode, we're exploring healthy interdependency. Interdependency is often cited as a key trait of secure functioning relationships, and yet many of us lack a clear picture of what healthy interdependency actually looks and feels like - especially if you have a history of insecure attachment patterns.
We'll cover:

the spectrum from codependency to hyper-independence
interdependency as a healthy middle ground
how different attachment styles relate to codependency, independence and interdependence
signs of healthy interdependency in a relationship

JOIN THE WAITLIST FOR MY NEW COURSE ON ANXIOUS-AVOIDANT RELATIONSHIPS

Highlighted Links

Additional Resources

Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here
Join my email list 💌
Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
Visit my website

#109: Anxious Attachment & Open Relationships Sep 14, 2023

Show notes

In today's episode, I'm sharing some thoughts around anxious attachment & open relationships. While not being my personal experience, this is an area I receive a lot of requests and questions around, as various non-monogamous relationship structures grow in popularity.
We'll cover:

common struggles of anxious attachment and how they might show up in an open relationship structure
the importance of having a strong relationship to self when exploring open relationships
communication, boundaries and self-advocacy
why you should never agree to open a relationship just to hold onto someone

Highlighted Links

Additional Resources

Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here
Join my email list 💌
Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
Visit my website

#108: How to Navigate Different Love Languages Sep 12, 2023

Show notes

You've probably heard about the 5 Love Languages as pioneered by Gary Chapman. In this episode, I’ll share how to navigate the very common situation of having different love languages to your partner. We'll also cover how love languages interface with anxious-avoidant dynamics, and offer insights and practical tools on how you can share your love language with your partner so they can understand how to love you the way you want to be loved (and vice versa)!

We’ll cover:

The 5 love languages: words of affirmation, physical touch, acts of service, gift giving, and quality time
The benefits of knowing your love language, and your partner's
How love languages play out in anxious-avoidant dynamics

Find me on my new Youtube channel - https://www.youtube.com/@stephanierigg/

Highlighted Links

Additional Resources

Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here
Join my email list 💌
Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
Visit my website

#107: Q&A: Mismatched Libido & Anxious-Avoidant Sexual Dynamics Sep 07, 2023

Show notes

Mismatched libido in a relationship is a challenge that a lot of couples face. In today’s episode, I’ll be answering a listener's question of how to navigate mismatched libido in a relationship, particularly in an anxious-avoidant dynamic. I’ll guide you on strategies to break the anxious-avoidant spiral, by initiating open dialogue and finding a middle ground between both partners.

We’ll cover:

Why it's unrealistic to expect your libidos to be in sync all the time
How anxious and avoidant attachment styles relate to sex and intimacy
Tips for reframing a partner's lack of interest in sex

Use the code PODCAST50 for 50% off the Sex and Attachment Masterclass - https://www.stephanierigg.com/sex-attachment

Highlighted Links

Additional Resources

Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here
Join my email list 💌
Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
Visit my website

#106: Retroactive Jealousy: Navigating Discomfort With Our Partner's Past Sep 05, 2023

Show notes

Retroactive jealousy is one that focuses on the past, fixating on other partners or stages in your partner's lives and being threatened by it. In today’s conversation, I’ll dive into how such jealousy stirs immense stress, but more importantly, we share insights into building healthier, more resilient relationships.

We'll cover:

Impacting our self worth
Looking for skeletons and reasons to not trust
If you should share the jealousy with your partner
Keeping yourself in an unhealthy loop

Highlighted Links

Additional Resources

Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here
Join my email list 💌
Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
Visit my website

#105: "How to navigate being newly single in my mid-30s? I feel like I'm out of time." Aug 31, 2023

Show notes

With societal pressures and a ticking clock, being newly single in your mid-30s can be challenging. In today’s episode, I want to share advice on navigating being newly single and the mindset for dating, and honouring the desires you have without feeling hopeless or overwhelmed.

We'll cover:

Grieving a future you thought you would have
The opportunity for reframe
Comparisons to other people’s lives
Creating a full and vibrant life for yourself

Use the code PHOENIX for $150 off the Higher Love Course https://www.stephanierigg.com/higher-love

Highlighted Links

Additional Resources

Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here
Join my email list 💌
Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
Visit my website

#104: The Importance of Separateness in Relationships Aug 29, 2023

Show notes

As an anxiously attached person, space in a relationship can sometimes feel like the biggest threat. In today’s episode, I’m sharing my own experience with this and advice on how you can consciously choose space and separateness to foster greater intimacy in your relationship, especially in a time where you may feel more drawn to stay connected.

We'll cover:

Wanting to close the gap and be closer
Advice for how to reset and nurture separateness
Things to do to focus on your own self-trust and security
Creating a healthier, more balanced relationship

Highlighted Links

Additional Resources

Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here
Join my email list 💌
Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
Visit my website

#103: How to Help a Partner Struggling with their Mental Health Aug 24, 2023

Show notes

Looking out for someone who you care for that is going through a hard time is a challenge most of us will have to face in our lifetimes. But feelings of threat to the relationship, especially as an anxious attached person may come up in these times, and I want to help you navigate through these while prioritising your wellbeing, and not overstepping.

We'll cover:

Monitoring your “fixing” the situation
Ways to support someone and yourself
How you can be a balanced supportive person
Nothing changes, unless something changes.

Highlighted Links

Additional Resources

Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here
Join my email list 💌
Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
Visit my website

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