Girls Gone Deep

Two sex-positive ladies in the ethically non-monogamous lifestyle chatting about how we use dating and sex as a space for personal development and growth, and creating the most joyous life possible. A podcast for the open-minded, curious and naughty. @girlsgonedeeppod www.girlsgonedeep.com

Latest Episodes:

021: Alternative Dating Apps for ENM and Kink: Exploring Desires, Finding Events Near You and Defining “Heteroflexible” May 25, 2023

Show notes

In this episode, Elle and Vee were inspired to chat about the alternative dating apps and websites that have worked for them in the lifestyle, including:

Feeld: what’s so special about this dating app? Is it harder for men on dating apps? (2:08)

Exploring desires: What kinds of people do you find on Feeld? Can you find a third, other couples, or a dom on Feeld? (8:10)

How quickly should you move from the app to real life? (12:15)

Safety and dating: what does Vee do to keep herself safe when dating solo? (14:05)

Sexual orientation: how do Elle and Vee identify themselves on Feeld? Changing your sexual orientation with more experience. What’s the difference between heteroflexible and bicurious, and is heteroflexible an offensive term? Defining heteroflexible, pansexual, asexual, and skoliosexual. (15:22)

Gender options on Feeld. (27:40)

Labels: the American versus European mentality around the need to label ourselves. (28:31)

Work and Swinger Apps: what happens if your boss finds your profile? (30:45)

Fetlife: BDSM website, meeting up and finding events. (36:55)

Kasidie: lifestyle events website, backstage passes and connecting with couples before an event. (41:24)

Traditional vs swinger apps. (45:07)

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— support the pod while you stock up on your favorite pleasure essentials.

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💌 Contact: girlsgonedeep@gmail.com

020: Weddings from an ENM Perspective, Divorce, and the Meaning of Being "Settled" May 18, 2023

Show notes

In this episode, Elle and Vee catch up on Elle’s trip to Florida with the Joy Fam, while Vee was at a monogamous friend’s wedding… which prompts the girls to go deep on weddings, divorce, and what it means to be settled.

Elle’s sexual mishap with The Builder in Tampa, and how she moved forward from her Hedonism trigger. (1:51)

Integrating lessons from podcast episodes: was Elle able to enjoy herself on marijuana? How was Vee able to work through her FOMO (fear of missing out)? How important it is to have friends you can be your authentic self with. (6:30)

Gravitating towards curious, open-minded people at “vanilla” events, and setting boundaries with monogamous friends at weddings who might be interested in playing while drunk. (14:48)

Avoiding being the “talk of the town”: What to do and what not to do at a monogamous wedding when you’re ENM (ethically non monogamous). (16:22)

ENM Weddings: What could a non-monogamous commitment ceremony look like? Elle describes a BDSM/lifestyle wedding that she attended, including a master/slave ceremony, shibari, and primal play. (21:01)

Marriage and Divorce: How important is a wedding or marriage? Why do people stay in unhappy marriages? (33:40)

How do you know when it’s time to leave a marriage? How Vee knew it was time to get divorced. (36:40)

What does it mean to be “settled”? (41:36)

Support the show

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How to Support the Show:

💰 Donate Here

💋Linktree: https://linktr.ee/girlsgonedeep

🎧 Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod

🛍️ Merch: girlsgonedeep.com/shop — wear your kinks proudly.

🍑 Woo More Play: Shop with our affiliate link
— support the pod while you stock up on your favorite pleasure essentials.

🪄 WAANDS™: Crystal Pleasure Products HERE. Get 15% off with code GIRLSGONEDEEP

🔮 WHOREible Life: Get 10% off your game deck with code GONEDEEP at whoreiblelife.com IG: @wlthegame

🔥 Naughty Disco’s Sexy NYC Dance Party: code GONEDEEP69 for 15% off any event ticket IG: @naughtydisco

💌 Contact: girlsgonedeep@gmail.com

019: Arousal Styles, FOMO, and Running Into Ex Lovers May 11, 2023

Show notes

In this episode, Elle and Vee discuss what turns them on based on Dr. Emily Morse’s (@sexwithemily) article, “These Are the 5 Arousal Styles, Which One Are You?” The girls also go super deep and share the tools they use to work through FOMO (fear of missing out) when they miss out on activities with friends, plus they share some listener responses!

Dr. Emily: Arousal Styles. What’s the difference between desire and arousal? What’s your sexual arousal type? How to get aroused when you’re stressed out from work. (2:00)

FOMO: how do you deal with FOMO? How does having the choice to miss the experience or not affect your FOMO? How does social media affect your FOMO? (5:13)

What is the core of FOMO: what is behind the “fear of missing out”? (18:56)

JOMO: “The Joy of Missing Out”. (24:39)

Do you experience more FOMO with your lifestyle friends than your traditional friends? Does longevity in a relationship affect FOMO levels? (28:12)

FOMO when you miss out on an event you weren’t invited to. Vee applies the tools for working through the stories her mind tells her when she experiences FOMO. (32:11)

Listener responses: Vanilla is derogatory, and book club ideas! (36:49)

Listener response: Hedonism Swing Breakers - what’s the best flow for the week? (40:27)

Does the word “lifestyle” imply hetero-swinger? (44:25)

What to do when you run into a past lover: should you approach an ex for “closure” or to “clear the air”? Who should approach who: the dumper or the dumpee? (47:11)

Support the show

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How to Support the Show:

💰 Donate Here

💋Linktree: https://linktr.ee/girlsgonedeep

🎧 Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod

🛍️ Merch: girlsgonedeep.com/shop — wear your kinks proudly.

🍑 Woo More Play: Shop with our affiliate link
— support the pod while you stock up on your favorite pleasure essentials.

🪄 WAANDS™: Crystal Pleasure Products HERE. Get 15% off with code GIRLSGONEDEEP

🔮 WHOREible Life: Get 10% off your game deck with code GONEDEEP at whoreiblelife.com IG: @wlthegame

🔥 Naughty Disco’s Sexy NYC Dance Party: code GONEDEEP69 for 15% off any event ticket IG: @naughtydisco

💌 Contact: girlsgonedeep@gmail.com

018: Female Friendships in ENM: Support, Finding Your People and “Zhuzhing” May 04, 2023

Show notes

This week, Elle and Vee chat with their friend “Mommy” about the importance of female friendships in CNM (consensual non-monogamy), including:
The importance of female friendships, and the differences between lifestyle and monogamous friendships. (1:22)

How does being sexual affect your friendships - female and male? (13:01)

Friends you’ve had from childhood vs friends you make in adulthood. (18:30)

What do you think when you think women in the lifestyle? (20:51)

“Girls’ girls” vs “guys’ girls”. (31:00)

Comparing ourselves to other women. (32:20)

Evolution of friendships: is there anyone who you originally didn’t vibe with who you’re good with now? (34:34)
How do you get over initial relationship anxiety? Putting in the time and work to create solid relationships. (39:32)

What can we as women do to support each other better in non-monogamous environments (sex parties, social mixers, lifestyle resorts, etc.)? (45:52)

Dealing with intimidation and self-comparison when meeting new women at mixers, sex parties and lifestyle resorts. (50:38)

Compersion when your partner is playing with your female friends. (59:19)

How has being non-monogamous affected mommy’s relationship with herself? (1:02:41)

Support the show

______

How to Support the Show:

💰 Donate Here

💋Linktree: https://linktr.ee/girlsgonedeep

🎧 Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod

🛍️ Merch: girlsgonedeep.com/shop — wear your kinks proudly.

🍑 Woo More Play: Shop with our affiliate link
— support the pod while you stock up on your favorite pleasure essentials.

🪄 WAANDS™: Crystal Pleasure Products HERE. Get 15% off with code GIRLSGONEDEEP

🔮 WHOREible Life: Get 10% off your game deck with code GONEDEEP at whoreiblelife.com IG: @wlthegame

🔥 Naughty Disco’s Sexy NYC Dance Party: code GONEDEEP69 for 15% off any event ticket IG: @naughtydisco

💌 Contact: girlsgonedeep@gmail.com

017: Guys Gone Deep on Approaching Women: Body Language, Turn Offs, and Panty Droppers Apr 27, 2023

Show notes

Elle and Vee continue their conversation with Chet about how to approach women in the lifetsyle, including:

Body Language: how can you figure out if someone is into you based on nonverbal signals? The importance of verbal communication. Should you ask for consent before touching someone (even non-sexually)? (1:46)

Organic Connections: Chemistry, and how does an initial “no” turn into a “yes”? (12:02)

Single vs partnered men: as a man, is it easier to play when a women is involved in the interaction? The dynamics of playing with partners. Aggressive men. (19:20)

Making Assumptions: The boundaries when playing with couples. Taking liberties based on signals. (29:16)

Panty Droppers! (33:32)

Turn-offs: how substances affect your ability to make connections, men taking liberties, asking for consent every time, aggresive dominance, and being creepy. (41:27)

How to hit on a woman in the lifestyle: using your partner as a wing woman or wing man, using activities as a way to break the ice, and being vulnerable. (53:30)

Support the show

______

How to Support the Show:

💰 Donate Here

💋Linktree: https://linktr.ee/girlsgonedeep

🎧 Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod

🛍️ Merch: girlsgonedeep.com/shop — wear your kinks proudly.

🍑 Woo More Play: Shop with our affiliate link
— support the pod while you stock up on your favorite pleasure essentials.

🪄 WAANDS™: Crystal Pleasure Products HERE. Get 15% off with code GIRLSGONEDEEP

🔮 WHOREible Life: Get 10% off your game deck with code GONEDEEP at whoreiblelife.com IG: @wlthegame

🔥 Naughty Disco’s Sexy NYC Dance Party: code GONEDEEP69 for 15% off any event ticket IG: @naughtydisco

💌 Contact: girlsgonedeep@gmail.com

016: Guys Gone Deep: Chet on Leaving Mormonism, Navigating ENM, and Approaching Women with Authenticity Apr 20, 2023

Show notes

This week, Elle and Vee talk with Chet, whose journey into the non-monogamous lifestyle is unique in that he was raised in the Church of Latter Day Saints (aka he was Mormon). He talks about everything from his upbringing to the challenges of approaching women.
This is part one of two, because their conversation was too juicy to cut off!

From Mormonism to non-monogamy: How Chet and his wife found the lifestyle after being raised in the Mormon church. How he overcame the guilt and shame he was taught around sexuality. What did his early sexual experiences look like? (1:40)

Transitioning to CNM (consensual non monogamy): mono-normative thinking, and overcoming the traditional thoughts taught in childhood. (9:20)

Your relationship with yourself: what has being the lifestyle taught you about yourself? Learning to be okay being alone, and gaining confidence. (13:32)

Navigating the lifestyle: What were your resources in the beginning of opening up your relationship? (20:20)

How to approach women in the lifestyle: how women in the lifestyle are different, and what makes men hesitant to be too forward when transitioning into the sexual space? (22:39)

Where do you start the conversation when hitting on a woman? What are some good pickup lines to get someone’s attention? (32:34)

Communication: dividing your time between partners, and the importance of communicating clearly to get what you want. (39:28)

Support the show

______

How to Support the Show:

💰 Donate Here

💋Linktree: https://linktr.ee/girlsgonedeep

🎧 Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod

🛍️ Merch: girlsgonedeep.com/shop — wear your kinks proudly.

🍑 Woo More Play: Shop with our affiliate link
— support the pod while you stock up on your favorite pleasure essentials.

🪄 WAANDS™: Crystal Pleasure Products HERE. Get 15% off with code GIRLSGONEDEEP

🔮 WHOREible Life: Get 10% off your game deck with code GONEDEEP at whoreiblelife.com IG: @wlthegame

🔥 Naughty Disco’s Sexy NYC Dance Party: code GONEDEEP69 for 15% off any event ticket IG: @naughtydisco

💌 Contact: girlsgonedeep@gmail.com

015: Going Deep with Julia Lange, the Woman Behind Hedonism Swing Breakers Apr 09, 2023

Show notes

In this episode, Elle and Vee chat with Julia Lange, the brains behind Hedonism Swing Breakers, and the daughter of Harry Lange, the owner of Hedonism II in Jamaica! Then, they answer all your questions submitted on social media about Hedo.
How did Hedonism II and Hedonism Swing Breakers come about? How did it become a family business? How nudity levels the playing field. (1:34)

How can ethical non-monogamy (ENM) enrich your relationship? (8:52)

All about HSB (Hedonism Swing Breakers) - How many guests are there? What's the difference between typical weeks and HSB? Are throuples allowed? (11:40)
What types of people and age groups go to Hedonism II in Jamaica? (14:13)

What are the rules at Hedo? What does Hedo do to keep it safe for guests? (17:26)
How the workshops and theme nights help you explore different sides of yourself. (20:22)
Permanent residency at Hedonism II Resort. (26:46)
What do the Jamaicans and staff think of Hedonism guests? (27:39)
How has being in the lifestyle affected your relationship with yourself and with your partner? (32:15)
Social Media Questions:

Tips for newbies!
- "What should I pack?" (36:22)
- "Is there anything I should know about the resort?" (39:10)
- "Which excursions should I go on?" (41:51)
- "Should I go see the shows?" (43:53)
- "Is there anything I should know about the Jamaican airport?" (44:15)
- "How do I get from the airport to Hedonism?" (46:41)
Where do Elle and Vee get their sexy rave theme outfits (costumes)? (50:20)
How does Hedo compare to other lifestyle resorts? (55:46)
Rapid fire questions! DP (double penetration), anonymous sex, sexual numbers, roses and thorns of the trip, how did you accomplish a desire you set for yourself. (1:00:34)

Support the show

______

How to Support the Show:

💰 Donate Here

💋Linktree: https://linktr.ee/girlsgonedeep

🎧 Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod

🛍️ Merch: girlsgonedeep.com/shop — wear your kinks proudly.

🍑 Woo More Play: Shop with our affiliate link
— support the pod while you stock up on your favorite pleasure essentials.

🪄 WAANDS™: Crystal Pleasure Products HERE. Get 15% off with code GIRLSGONEDEEP

🔮 WHOREible Life: Get 10% off your game deck with code GONEDEEP at whoreiblelife.com IG: @wlthegame

🔥 Naughty Disco’s Sexy NYC Dance Party: code GONEDEEP69 for 15% off any event ticket IG: @naughtydisco

💌 Contact: girlsgonedeep@gmail.com

014: Hedonism Swing Breakers: Being Naked in Public, Prioritizing Your Partner, and Orgy Highlights Apr 06, 2023

Show notes

In this episode, Elle and Vee record both during and after their week at Hedonism II Resort in Negril, Jamaica for the theme week Hedonism Swing Breakers. First, they set intentions and afterwards, they reflect on their experience - all the highlights, learning moments and dirty details, including:

Hedonism: What is it like being nude in public, and how does it affect your interactions? How do you know what a couple’s boundaries and interests are? Theme nights and entertainment. (00:24)

Setting non-sexual intentions for the week. (9:44)

Sexual intentions and “Fuckit List” items: double penetration (DP) and gang bangs. (14:31)

Prioritizing time with your partner at swinger resorts, and how to deal with FOMO on group trips. (17:51)

Sexual mantras, sexual female connections and impact play sessions. (20:26)

Overall assessments of Hedo: does being nude in public get easier throughout the week? Comparing past Hedonism experiences and HSB 2023. Tip for newbies: get off the resort and go to Lobster Island! (24:16)

Using a banana as a sex toy: crazy silly memories with friends AKA the “Barnarnar” story. (34:46)

Major takeaway: friends in the lifestyle, the sense of community at HSB, and picking up where you left off the year before. (37:30)

What is Nuru, and why is it a highlight for Elle? (38:48)

Did Vee fulfill her DP intention? (43:10)

Vee’s first MFM: what’s the secret ingredient to enjoying and thriving in an MFM? (47:12)

What it’s like to have the party room. (51:15)

Triggers: How Elle worked through a triggering moment, and how she grew from it, the importance of speaking up and doing fears desires boundaries, and making everything about us. (53:44)

What is the Fetish Night show at Hedonism like? (1:02:57)

Re-learning the same lessons with your partner until they sink in: how do you deal when two partners have different libidos and aren’t on the same page at a lifestyle event? How women lead a lot of the interactions in the lifestyle, and the challenges for men when their partner isn’t in the mood. (1:04:27)

Support the show

______

How to Support the Show:

💰 Donate Here

💋Linktree: https://linktr.ee/girlsgonedeep

🎧 Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod

🛍️ Merch: girlsgonedeep.com/shop — wear your kinks proudly.

🍑 Woo More Play: Shop with our affiliate link
— support the pod while you stock up on your favorite pleasure essentials.

🪄 WAANDS™: Crystal Pleasure Products HERE. Get 15% off with code GIRLSGONEDEEP

🔮 WHOREible Life: Get 10% off your game deck with code GONEDEEP at whoreiblelife.com IG: @wlthegame

🔥 Naughty Disco’s Sexy NYC Dance Party: code GONEDEEP69 for 15% off any event ticket IG: @naughtydisco

💌 Contact: girlsgonedeep@gmail.com

013: What Does "Vanilla" Mean to Swingers? Mar 30, 2023

Show notes

After some thought-provoking conversations with monogamous (non-lifestyle) friends, Vee and Elle discuss what the word "vanilla" actually means to them, and pose the same question to a few of their CNM (consensually non-monogamous) friends at Hedonism II in Jamaica.
What does “vanilla” mean to Elle and Vee as people in the lifestyle? (2:07)

What is “spicy vanilla”? (7:24)

Are we meant to be monogamous? (11:49)

Using "vanilla" to describe career choices. (13:58)

Offending monogamous friends with the use of "vanilla". (16:56)

Polling ENM (ethically non-monogamous) friends at Hedonism on what "vanilla" means to them:

The Builder (20:18)
The Magician and Nikki (21:44)
Chet (26:10)
Slutlana69 (29:14)
Josh (30:55)
Chantelle (33:10)

The final verdict: what does "vanilla" mean to people in the lifestyle? (38:40)

Support the show

______

How to Support the Show:

💰 Donate Here

💋Linktree: https://linktr.ee/girlsgonedeep

🎧 Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod

🛍️ Merch: girlsgonedeep.com/shop — wear your kinks proudly.

🍑 Woo More Play: Shop with our affiliate link
— support the pod while you stock up on your favorite pleasure essentials.

🪄 WAANDS™: Crystal Pleasure Products HERE. Get 15% off with code GIRLSGONEDEEP

🔮 WHOREible Life: Get 10% off your game deck with code GONEDEEP at whoreiblelife.com IG: @wlthegame

🔥 Naughty Disco’s Sexy NYC Dance Party: code GONEDEEP69 for 15% off any event ticket IG: @naughtydisco

💌 Contact: girlsgonedeep@gmail.com

012: Guys Gone Deep: The Builder and M on Double Penetration, Short Men, and Friendships in the Lifestyle Mar 22, 2023

Show notes

This week, Elle and Vee chat with M and their friend The Builder, who are known as the "DP Duo" in their friend group. The girls ask them all the dirty details about double penetration, as well as go deep on The Builder's journey with his wife in the lifestyle.
What does DP (double penetration) feel like for the guy? (1:12)

How did The Builder get into the lifestyle, how has an open relationship affected his relationship to himself and to his wife? (5:32)

Sex with strangers vs. friends: the connections and friendships in consensual non-monogamy. (10:20)

Setting intentions, and prioritizing reconnecting with your partner at play parties. (17:06)

Should you check in with both partners before playing with someone? (22:36)

Back to double penetration: the difference between anal and vagina, logistics, anal prep, and positions. (28:26)

Connections between men in ENM (ethical non-monogamy). (38:30)

Short men: what it’s like to be a short man in the lifestyle, what gives them confidence, and how the lifestyle inspires us to stay in shape. (40:41)

Talking to your vanilla friends about your lifestyle, and how openness is not for everyone. (52:37)

Growing with your partner: differing sex drives, developing feelings for a unicorn, communication and acceptance. (57:39)

How to find new play partners: online, apps, and in person energy. (1:01:45)

Support the show

______

How to Support the Show:

💰 Donate Here

💋Linktree: https://linktr.ee/girlsgonedeep

🎧 Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod

🛍️ Merch: girlsgonedeep.com/shop — wear your kinks proudly.

🍑 Woo More Play: Shop with our affiliate link
— support the pod while you stock up on your favorite pleasure essentials.

🪄 WAANDS™: Crystal Pleasure Products HERE. Get 15% off with code GIRLSGONEDEEP

🔮 WHOREible Life: Get 10% off your game deck with code GONEDEEP at whoreiblelife.com IG: @wlthegame

🔥 Naughty Disco’s Sexy NYC Dance Party: code GONEDEEP69 for 15% off any event ticket IG: @naughtydisco

💌 Contact: girlsgonedeep@gmail.com

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