Ask Dr. Julie Hanks

Latest Episodes:

How can I develop a sense of self without falling into perfectionism? Sep 14, 2021

Show notes

In this episode, Dr. Julie Hanks coaches Heather and addresses the question “How can I develop a sense of self without falling into perfectionism?” Individuals who grow up continually praised for their accomplishments can sometimes feel like they need to be doing something big and grand in order for an activity to be worth their time.
During this episode, Dr. Hanks guides Heather by sharing that our performance and our worth are not connected in any way. A person’s worth is based on the fact that they exist and that they’re a human being, and that never changes.

If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com

Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session.
Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review. And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify.

How can I support my LGBTQ brother who recently came out, and support my parents who are heartbroken about it? Sep 07, 2021

Show notes

In this episode, Dr. Julie Hanks coaches Melissa and addresses the question “How can I support my LGBTQ brother who recently came out, and support my parents who are heartbroken about it?” There’s some grieving that comes along with families shifting and changing. When this happens, the family won’t be the same.
During this episode, Dr. Hanks validates Melissa that right now, people in her family are in a lot of pain, and that’s hard. This episode focuses on how we can nurture empathy within our family without nurturing enmeshment.

How can I find my purpose now that my kids are all in school? Aug 31, 2021

Show notes

In this episode, Dr. Julie Hanks coaches Sara and addresses the question, “How can I find my purpose now that my kids are all in school?” When the kids all enter school, it can cause parents to feel pressured to fill that time with a new job or hobby. Dr. Hanks encourages Sara to enjoy this beautiful time to explore and find things in addition to family that are really meaningful. Make a list of things that are interesting or worth exploring more and see where it leads you.
During this episode, Dr. Hanks also challenges Sara’s thinking that investing in yourself is not contributing to your community. What you have done, what you are doing, and what you want to do are all valuable.

How can I deal with my child's mental health struggles without becoming burned out myself? Aug 24, 2021

Show notes

In this episode, Dr. Julie Hanks coaches Sarah Coyne, professor of human development in the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University, and addresses the question, “How can I deal with my child's mental health struggles without becoming burned out myself?”” When our children struggle we often feel that we need to “have it all together” and may question the validity of our feelings of overwhelm, sadness, and powerlessness.
During this episode, Dr. Hanks guides Sarah through identifying that she is doing everything she can do for her child, and challenges Sarah to let herself be the mom and not the “expert.” Dr. Hanks also encourages Sarah to give herself the grace and self compassion she needs.
Supporting a Loved One With Mental Illness

If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com

How can I make more friends as an introvert? Aug 17, 2021

Show notes

In this episode, Dr. Julie Hanks coaches Sophie and addresses the question, “How can I make more friends as an introvert?” Whether we are introverts or extroverts, we are responsible for getting our social needs met, and we are often the one who has to reach out to others.

During this episode, Dr. Hanks guides Sophie through identifying why she may feel uncomfortable finding friends in large social gatherings, and how her history of moving frequently as a child may be impacting her today. Even when you feel the fear, do it anyway, and friendships will begin to develop.
Adults Need Friends Too
If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com

How can I teach my kids responsibility without creating a parentified relationship? Aug 10, 2021

Show notes

In this episode, Dr. Julie Hanks coaches Alyssa and addresses the question, “How can I teach my kids responsibility without creating a parentified relationship?” When teaching children responsibility, a good place to begin is looking at the age appropriateness of the task you're asking them to complete.

During this episode, Dr. Hanks also guides Alyssa through identifying the lack of support and resources she felt as a child with responsibilities, and helps her identify how her children's experience will be different.

How might purity culture be affecting my marriage? Aug 03, 2021

Show notes

In this episode, Dr. Julie Hanks coaches Erica and addresses the question, “How might purity culture be affecting my marriage?” Sometimes in society, sexuality is framed as a male thing, where men are sexual and women aren’t. So we don’t have permission as females to own our own sexuality and sensuality.

During this episode, Dr. Hanks guides Erica through identifying specific ways she can open up her communication with her husband and asks Erica “what would you say or do if this was just as much about you as it is about him?” They also talk about how to teach children about the principle of chastity and healthy sexuality without shame.
Assertiveness & Women’s Sexuality: Mormon Sex Info Podcast
5 Ways Mormons Can Teach Healthy Sexuality

How can I cope when life doesn’t go the way I planned? Jul 27, 2021

Show notes

In this episode, Dr. Julie Hanks coaches Emily and addresses the question, “How can I cope when life doesn’t go the way I planned?” When life doesn’t go the way we plan, it can feel like something is wrong.

During this episode, Dr. Hanks guides Emily through ways she can set boundaries with those who provide invalidating feedback about her life. They also talk about reframing the idea of being on the wrong track to the idea of being on the track where we need to be.

Read Dr. Hanks’ popular Mormon Cultural Commentary Blog Articles

Bonus episode: Live podcast celebrating 100,000 downloads Jul 20, 2021

Show notes

In this episode, join Dr. Julie Hanks as she answers audience questions at her live event celebrating 100,000 podcast downloads.
If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast, my online courses, and through my membership program, Empower Her Circle. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com

How can I be happy while being sensitive to the pain of other people? Jul 13, 2021

Show notes

In this episode, Dr. Julie Hanks coaches Nadia and addresses the question, “How can I be happy while being sensitive to the pain of other people?” Throughout life we will have things we are happy about, while other people in our circle may not have that same thing. That can put us in a situation where we hold two seemingly conflicting emotions at the same time, wanting to celebrate our joy while also empathizing with others.
During this episode, Dr. Hanks guides Nadia through how to appreciate and have gratitude for what we have while being sensitive to other people’s pain. You can hold both, you can check in with the people you are concerned about and you can celebrate. Dr. Hanks also reminds Nadia that we are responsible for our behavior, not others feelings or emotions.
Has Infertility Impacted Your Relationships

If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast, my online courses, and through my membership program, Empower Her Circle. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com

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