What If Marvel was Real?

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Episode 87: The Constitutional Rights of Molecule Man (Fantastic Four #20) -- November 1963 Oct 05, 2021

Show notes

In this episode:

Mike and Ed discuss the most powerful super-powered villain encountered so far, the Molecule Man, can rearrange molecules and everything is made of molecules. After defeating the Fantastic Four in public, Reed Richards claims that his team defeated the villain in secret. How was a man so powerful defeated? Was he killed? If not, how can a man who can turn a jail cell into a rose garden being held against his will? Does the Molecule Man have any constitutional rights? And if not, where do we draw the line on who the Fantastic Four or the government are allowed to “deal with” extra-legally?

In this issue:

The Fantastic Four respond to a threat in the middle of New York City, which turns out to be a gateway to the dimension occupied by the Watcher, a mysterious alien whom we will learn more about as this series continues, but who for the purposes of this issue you should know simply observes but does not interfere. The Watcher explains that an Earthling known as the Molecule Man, who was accidentally created due to a mistake with atomic devices, poses an existential threat to the multiverse. Imbued with his powers to change molecules at his whim, the Molecule Man has been settling petty scores, and the Watcher is concerned that he will not stop until he destroys the solar system and beyond. The Fantastic Four return to Earth and take on the Molecule Man, who has already tried to take over the Earth. They do battle, but the Molecule Man comes out on top. He is nigh omnipotent, and has no problem demonstrating his amazing powers. All seems lost until the Thing’s girlfriend, the blind sculptor Alicia Masters, tricks the Molecule Man into believing that he cannot control the molecules in clay statues that Alicia has created of the Fantastic Four. It turns out that they are not statutes but in fact the Fantastic Four, covered in clay. The Watcher then re-enters the picture and spirits the Molecule Man away, rationalizing that because the Fantastic Four, at that very moment, technically defeated the Molecule Man, he can intercede and remove the Molecule Man from the equation.

Assumed before the next episode:

People wonder what happened to the supremely powerful Molecule Man.

This episode takes place:

After the Molecule Man disappears.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.superserious616.com

Episode 86: Atomic Power - Humanity’s Only Hope? (Tales to Astonish #49) -- November 1963 Oct 04, 2021

Show notes

In this episode:

Mike and Ed discuss a newly discovered dimension that exists alongside ours. This dimension has had the technology to observe us for thousands of years, and yet they do not yet have the secrets of atomic power. How rare is an understanding of atomic nuclear power among aliens and other-dimensional beings? Did humans advance in technology in some unusual way? Was it the discovery of atomic power that is causing all of these attacks on our planet? And is atomic power also why we are seeing so many super-powered people appear in such a short timeframe? Also, we welcome to the scene Giant-Man and take bets on which super hero team he will join.

In this issue:

Hank Pym decides to use his size formula in the opposite direction, and grow rather than shrink, becoming Giant-Man in the process. Meanwhile, the police are on the hunt for the Eraser, who is apparently erasing people from existence. The Eraser erases Hank Pym, who is actually transported to Dimension Z. It turns out the Eraser has been “erasing”, or transporting, human scientists to Dimension Z so that they can develop atomic power for them. Fortunately for Hank, the Wasp had shrunken and was “erased” with Hank too, unbeknownst to the Eraser. She helps free Hank, and the two of them free the scientists and bring them to Earth.

Assumed before the next episode:

People have not learned about Dimension Z, although they are grateful that their scientists are back. They’re also wondering about this new hero Giant-Man.

This episode takes place:

After the scientists have been safely returned to Earth.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.superserious616.com

Episode 85: The "Return" of Captain America (Strange Tales #114) -- November 1963 Oct 01, 2021

Show notes

In this episode:

Mike and Ed discuss the living legend, Captain America. Or, at least the guy who is impersonating him. Impersonating Capt seems like it would be even easier than impersonating Spider-Man - so why was everyone so eager to believe that the soldier from World War II had returned? And if Captain America truly did return, would he really spend his time selling used cars? Is our society and media truly that naive, or is it that the symbol of Captain America is so powerful that we refused to give voice to our doubts? Also, should the government create a new Captain America, if only as a symbol, or would that be insulting to the original? If we need a new name for a new icon, what should the name be?

In This Issue:

The town of Glenville is abuzz with the news that World War II hero Captain America has returned. Not only that, he’s making a public appearance at an antique auto show in town. Johnny Storm heads to the auto show and jumps into action as the Human Torch when he sees a robbery in place. So does Captain America, who treats Johnny pretty poorly. Nonetheless, Cap gets great press after he captures the thugs. We then learn that Cap was in on the robbery, when he breaks the thugs out of jail. Johnny tries to recapture the thugs and succeeds, whereupon he learns that Cap was in on the plan, which was all a smokescreen so that he could rob a bank. Johnny battles Cap once more and, once he defeats him, learns he is his old enemy, the Acrobat.

Assumed before the next episode:

People are wondering if the real Captain America will return.

This episode takes place:

After the fake Captain America has been captured.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.superserious616.com

Episode 84: The Department of Special Affairs (X-Men #2) -- November 1963 Sep 29, 2021

Show notes

In this episode:

Mike and Ed discuss how the X-Men have become famous celebrities, just like the Fantastic Four; what the best super power would be; and the definition of super-powered terrorism (is it the actions or the goal that make it a terrorist act?) Is the Department of Special Affairs part of the military, or does it report to the Departments of Justice or National Intelligence? Also, what do we do with super-terrorists when they are incapacitated? We do not have the jails that can hold them, or technology to neutralize their powers. Are they sedated, and if so, how can the government engage in such unethical treatment of these people?

In this issue:

The X-Men are sought after celebrities, beloved the world over. Surely this will never change. In any event, they have a new assignment from Professor X, which is to capture the Vanisher, a mutant who has the ability to teleport. The Vanisher is using his abilities to rob banks in a garish costume. He announces his intention to rob the Pentagon, which leads to much consternation. FBI Special Agent Fred Duncan reaches out to Professor X to ask him for help in preventing the Vanisher from carrying out his threat. The X-Men are sent into the field but are unable to capture the man who can disappear at will. The next time they meet is on the lawn of the White House - the X-Men versus the Vanisher and a veritable army of thugs. Before they can engage, Professor X uses his incredible telepathic powers to get the Vanisher to forget that he can teleport, and then forget who he is, leaving the X-Men to take down the thugs, which they do with ease.

Assumed before the next episode:

People breathe a sigh of relief that the Vanisher has been dealt with, although the conscientious among them wonder what became of him.

This episode takes place:

After the thugs have been cleared off the White House lawn.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.superserious616.com

Episode 83: Super-terrorism (Journey Into Mystery #98) -- November 1963 Sep 27, 2021

Show notes

In this episode:

Mike and Ed discuss the first super-powered person from India, the Cobra, who has abilities similar to Spider-Man and apparently knows how to duplicate how he developed his powers in other people. How do we handle a situation where not just countries, but individuals, have the ability to create armies of super-powered people? How long can we keep this technology secret? How will we handle terrorists when anyone can have super powers? And does the government have the right to stop experimentation on our own bodies?

In this issue:

A scientist working in India figures out how to give himself superpowers based on cobras, which is to let a radioactive cobra he had been working on bite him. Now calling himself the Cobra, he heads to the US and demands control over the entire planet. Thor intervenes and battles the Cobra, who can fly and shoot deadly venom vapour. The Cobra bests Thor twice, but on their third encounter, with the Cobra holding Thor’s friend Jane Foster hostage, Thor comes out on top. The Cobra slithers away, clearly intent on revenge another day.

Assumed before the next episode:

People are wondering if the Cobra’s miraculous powers are, indeed, capable of replication.

This episode takes place:

After Thor finally defeated the Cobra.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.superserious616.com

Episode 82: Interrupting Ed Sullivan with a fake Spider-Man (Amazing Spider-Man #5) -- October 1963 Sep 24, 2021

Show notes

In this episode:

Mike and Ed discuss a case of mistaken identity ,and how easy it seems to be to impersonate Spider-Man. Perhaps if you want to kidnap the wallcrawler, you should ensure that your captive can spin a web? And if you want to extort someone, wouldn’t threatening poor defenseless orphans be a better choice than a superhero anyway? Does the genius Doctor Doom have a master plan that we just don’t understand? Are we walking right into his trap?

In this issue:

The Daily Bugle is trashing Spider-Man as a lawless vigilante. But that doesn’t stop Flash Thompson, Spider-Man’s #1 fan (and Peter Parker’s teenage nemesis) from sticking up for his hero. Meanwhile, Dr. Doom plots his revenge against the Fantastic Four. He figures that all he needs is Spider-Man as his partner in his plan to take down the Four. Spider-Man rebuffs Doom’s efforts to woo him into a team-up, and the two battle, with Spider-Man escaping. Later, Flash dresses up as Spider-Man, and Doom mistakes him for the real deal and kidnaps him. The real Spider-Man battles Dr. Doom once more, and saves Flash from his evil clutches.

Assumed before the next episode:

People start re-thinking their Spider-Man Halloween costumes for fear of being kidnapped by a foreign dictator.

This episode takes place:

After Spider-Man has rescued Flash Thompson from Dr. Doom.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.superserious616.com

Episode 81: Cold War scientists (Tales of Suspense #46) -- October 1963 Sep 22, 2021

Show notes

In this episode:

Mike and Ed discuss how everyone (other countries, aliens, other dimensional entities) seems to be kidnapping scientists. Has the United States started down this path as well? Did Professor Vanko defect voluntarily, or as a result of duress? Was his alternative a jail cell? Also, is Vanko going to mass produce armor that compares to Iron Man’s armor? If so, will Stark technology soon make the Avengers obsolete?

In this issue:

The Soviet leader visits top scientist Ivan Vanko, who has created a body armor similar to that of Iron Man. Vanko demonstrates the armor’s awesome capabilities. Vanko takes on the name Crimson Dynamo, and travels to the US and uses his armor to scramble the circuits of an experimental rocket. Iron Man springs into action and saves the pilots of the rocket just in time. Thereafter, Vanko starts attacking Stark production plants. The US government responds by cancelling their contracts with Stark, fearing over-reliance on the military contractor. Company president Tony Stark, who is secretly Iron Man, investigates and ultimately confronts the Crimson Dynamo. They do battle and, after Iron Man comes out on top, Iron Man plays a radio message that he had intercepted of the Soviet leader planning to assassinate the Crimson Dynamo. This causes the Crimson Dynamo to defect and then work for Tony Stark in his research division.

Assumed before the next episode:

People are wondering when they might get a super-powered battle suit of their own.

This episode takes place:

After Ivan Vanko, the Crimson Dynamo, defects to the US.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.superserious616.com

Episode 80: The Botanophobics were Right! (Strange Tales #113) -- October 1963 Sep 20, 2021

Show notes

In this episode:

Mike and Ed discuss the attempted take-over of New York by “The Plantman”. Where do his powers come from? Technology or some sort of innate power like the Human Torch? Also, he was stopped, but not apprehended. Do we need to stay afraid of all plant life going forward? And if the goal is world domination, why start with New York City?

In this issue:

Johnny Storm is dating a woman who basically does not like that he can turn into a literal human torch. Her father also has a problem with someone in his life - Sam the gardener - and so he fires him. Sam is actually an inventor, and late the night he is fired, he works away in his garden with a special formula that he invented to give plants intelligence. While doing so, a bolt of lightening strikes his device and gives Sam the ability to control all plant life. Armed with these strange and amazing powers, Sam goes about framing his former boss with a a crime. The Torch figures it out, and battles Sam, now going by the name Plantman. The Torch is defeated, and Plantman then heads to New YOrk City to take over the world through its plants. The Torch returns to battle Plantman once more, and after a pitched battle involving the Torch torturing plants, the Torch wins. Plantman remains at large, though.

Assumed before the next episode:

People are looking differently at their house plants and gardens.

This episode takes place:

After Plantman is defeated.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.superserious616.com

Episode 79: Lava-People Cultural Attitudes (Journey Into Mystery #97) -- October 1963 Sep 17, 2021

Show notes

In this episode:

Mike and Ed discuss the invasion of New York City by the “Lava Man”. There is apparently an entire race of lava-based humanoids beneath the Earth’s surface who can cause dormant volcanos in the Adirondacks to explode. We should be entering diplomatic negotiations with this society as soon as possible. Also, why was Thor the last line of defense instead of the first? And where were the other nine New York-based super heroes?

In this issue:

Thor saves a jet pilot from his plane as it spirals out of control over New York City. All in a day’s work for the god of thunder, Thor! He seems somewhat agoraphobic when the city media approach him, leading him to flee and return to his mortal guise as Dr. Donald Blake. Meanwhile, people are terrified to learn that a Lava Man is causing dormant volcanoes to erupt, leading many to leave the city. Lava Man defeats the military with his intense heat, and he gives Thor a run for his money. After a ferocious battle, Thor defeats Lava Man, returning him below the Earth’s surface.

Assumed before the next episode:

People slowly return to New York City, now that Lava Man has been defeated.

This episode takes place:

After Lava Man has been defeated.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.superserious616.com

Episode 78: Superhero handoff, and chain of custody in vigilante justice (Tales to Astonish #48) -- October 1963 Sep 15, 2021

Show notes

In this episode:

Mike and Ed discuss Alex Gentry, “The Porcupine”, a government scientist who stole the Iron Man-like armor that he had built and attempts to use it for a life of crime. Ant-Man figured out who the Porcupine was, but Gentry still escaped and is at large. Who is responsible for tracking him down? Also, how dangerous are porcupines anyway?

In this issue:

Alex Gentry invents a porcupine battle suit while working for the US government and decides to throw his previous life away for a life of crime as… The Porcupine! His first order of business is to rob a bank while looking like a porcupine, which he does. Ant-Man and the Wasp happen to be at the bank in their civilian guises, and decide to investigate. Ant-Man eventually tracks down the Porcupine, who is ready for him. The Porcupine tries to drown Ant-Man, although he escapes. He and the Wasp then return to battle the Porcupine and defeat him by spraying liquid cement all over him. The Porcupine then flies away, vowing to improve his porcupine battle suit (the fact that it flies isn’t enough) and do battle once more.

Assumed before the next episode:

The world feels safer knowing an ant and a wasp can take down a porcupine.

This episode takes place:

After the Porcupine is defeated by Ant-Man and the Wasp.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.superserious616.com

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