Turtle Time

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Betrayal at Barney's Beanery (VPR S12 E4 and RHOSLC S6 E15 Recaps) Jan 02, 2026

Show notes

On today's wonderful, exclusive episode of Turtle Time - "Betrayal at Barney's Beanery" - we break down all of the hottest news items of the week including Kyle Richards and Mauricio getting cozy by the fire on New Years Eve, Antonia Gorga getting a lot of presents from Santa, and Heather Dubrow potentially joining the cast of RHOBH. (00:00 - 23:35)

We then recap this week's episode of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City - season 6, episode 15 - "The Quiet Spa". (23:35)

And finally, we discuss this week's episode of Vanderpump Rules - season 12 episode 4 - "The New DJ". (51:00)

If you enjoyed this episode and need more Turtle Time in your life, join the ⁠Turtle Time Patreon⁠ and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear exclusive bonus content! We're recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each week and uncovering all of its secrets.

And if you need even more Turtle Time in your life, follow us on ⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠. And please, if you want to watch some of the fun things we do, subscribe on YouTube.

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Unlocking the Gates: A Decent Proposal (Vanderpump Rules S7 E1 Recap) Dec 31, 2025

Show notes

For the third time ever, Amy and Riley unlock the gates of Villa Rosa to provide the Little Turtle Cutie community with this free, full-length episode from our Patreon. Sit back and enjoy the life of a Villa Rosa VIP as we recap Vanderpump Rules season 7, episode 1 - "A Decent Proposal" in which Jax proposes to Brittany at the Malibu Crab Hut.

If you enjoyed this full-length episode and want to become a cherished Villa Rosa VIP, join the Turtle Time Patreon to hear our entire archive and access exclusive bonus content! We'll be recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each week. And if you need even more Turtle Time in your life, follow us on ⁠TikTok⁠ or ⁠Instagram⁠.

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The Second Official Turtle Time Q&A Dec 26, 2025

Show notes

We proudly present to you the second official Turtle Time Q&A. We answer all of your most burning questions starting with the most sexy question all the way to the least sexy. We hope you enjoy all of these answers and they tide you over until we have normal episodes again.

If you enjoyed this episode and need more Turtle Time in your life, join the ⁠⁠Turtle Time Patreon⁠⁠ and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear exclusive bonus content! We're recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each week.

And if you need even more Turtle Time in your life, follow us on ⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠. And please, if you want to watch some of the fun things we do, subscribe on ⁠YouTube⁠.

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Turtle Time Christmas: RHONY's "December: Berkshires County" (S8 E9) Dec 24, 2025

Show notes

It's Christmas Eve and not a creature is stirring except for us as we recap this wonderful Christmas-themed episode of Real Housewives of New York City - "December: Berkshires County" (S8 E9).

We hope this bring you joy during this Christmas holiday and we want to thank you all for supporting Turtle Time this year. We love you all.

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Sutton UnStracked (Southern Charm S11 E5 and RHOBH S15 E3 Recap) Dec 19, 2025

Show notes

In this very special episode of Turtle Time - "Sutton UnStracked" - we discuss Alejandro G. Iñárritu's new film, Digger, NeNe Leakes potentially joining Ultimate Road Trip, Joe Gorga preparing this year's Feast of Seven Fishes, for his sister, Teresa, and even more exciting news than that if you listen. (00:00 - 19:00)

We then vicariously party our asses off while talking about this week's episode (S11 E5) of Southern Charm - "Craig's Shitty Paige-less Pool Party." (19:05).

And finally, we discuss this week's episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (season 15, episode 3) - "A Match Made in Hell!" (52:25)

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We Need To Talk About Meredith (VPR S12 E3 and RHOSLC S6 E14 Recaps) Dec 17, 2025

Show notes

On today's wonderful, exclusive episode of Turtle Time - "We Need To Talk About Meredith" - we break down all of the hottest news items of the week including The Traitors season 4 trailer, the Avatar: Fire and Ash advance reviews, and Todd Bradley and Bronwyn Newport getting a divorce. (00:00 - 23:00)

We then provide our thoughts on the two episodes of RHOP we missed. (23:05)

And then discuss this week's episode of Vanderpump Rules - season 12 episode 3 - "Dated But Related". (40:30)

And finally, we recap this week's episode of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City - season 6, episode 14 - "My Big Fat Greek Cooking Class". (01:05:15)

And if you need even more Turtle Time in your life, follow us on ⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠. And please, if you want to watch some of the fun things we do, subscribe on YouTube.

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A Beast at the Literary Feast (Southern Charm S11 E4 and RHOBH S15 E2 Recap) Dec 12, 2025

Show notes

In this very special episode of Turtle Time - "A Beast at the Literary Feast" - we discuss Kyle Cooke slamming a Truly at 5:30am and falling asleep on someone's couch, and Jen Shah flying the coop (prison) and getting out way early by having some of the best behavior in the world. We also mention the staggering box office numbers for Zootopia 2. (00:00 - 23:35)

We then vicariously party our asses off while talking about this week's episode (S11 E4) of Southern Charm - "What Moveable Beast Slouches Toward Charleston to Be Born" (23:35).

And finally, we discuss this week's episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (season 15, episode 2) - "Tom Girardi’s Horrible 86th Birthday" (58:05)

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Patreon Teaser: No Country For Vanderpump Rules' Old Men Dec 11, 2025

Show notes

Amy and Riley discuss the horrendous character work that Jax, Schwartz, Sandoval, and Beau employ for their "old men" disguises during Jax's bachelor party.

If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content! We'll be recapping the Vanderpump Rules series from the beginning each week. And if you need even more Turtle Time in your life, follow us on ⁠TikTok⁠ or ⁠Instagram⁠.

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Clash of the Titans (VPR S12 E2 and RHOSLC S6 E13) Dec 10, 2025

Show notes

On today's episode of Turtle Time - "Clash of the Titans" - we talk about going to a wonderful Vanderpump Rules party at SUR (10:10) , and then we break down the Summer House season 10 trailer. (24:35)

We then talk about this week's episode of Vanderpump Rules - season 12 episode 2 - "Audrey's 22nd Birthday" and how much our judgement is now clouded after having met most of them. (38:10)

And finally, we recap this week's episode of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City - season 6, episode 13 - "Greek for the Week". (01:17:17)

And if you need even more Turtle Time in your life, follow us on ⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠. And please, if you want to watch some of the fun things we do, subscribe on YouTube.

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The Battle of Rufio and Hermione (Southern Charm S11 E3 and RHOBH S15 E1 Recap) Dec 05, 2025

Show notes

In this very special episode of Turtle Time - "The Battle of Rufio and Hermione" - Amy and Riley talk about so much news it will have your head spinning. News items such as Lindsay Hubbard and Mr. Bananas' war of words, Austen Kroll's Raising Cane's sponsorship that stars a familiar Christmas icon, Countess Luann's US Weekly cover, and Quentin Tarantino's awful denigration of Paul Dano's acting skills are all covered extensively. (00:00 - 34:05)

We then vicariously party our asses off while talking about this week's very fun episode (S11 E3) of Southern Charm - "Whitney's Literary Birthday Party" (34:10).

And finally, we discuss the delightful season 15 premiere of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills - "The Annulment of Sutton Stracke". (01:28:30)

And if you need even more Turtle Time in your life, follow us on ⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠. And please, if you want to watch some of the fun things we do, subscribe on YouTube.

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