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    Careers

    The Purposeful Career Podcast

    The Purposeful Career is the go-to podcast for women at mid career who want to elevate or reinvent all or part of their work or life. We do this by first getting clear about what they want and then about the next level person they need to become in order to have it. This is about deep mindset and self-image work. And when you mater it, you’ll not only up-level your career, you’ll have the power to completely transform your life. Join brand strategist, founder and coach, Carla Hudson, as she shares strategies, tips and tools for helping you create the extraordinary career and life you’re dreaming of.  

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    Latest Episodes:
    Ep 025: Thought Pathways (How Our Thoughts Work #3 of 4) Jun 20, 2021
    Show notes

    Managing your mind. It is THE key to not only a more rewarding and meaningful career. It’s the secret to living your best life.

    Sounds a little woo woo if it’s the first time you’re hearing this. But it’s true. I promise.

    Given the interest, I decided to go a little deeper into the topic with a concept I call Thought Pathways. And this one is relevant to every human on the planet because it’s about repetitive thoughts, which is where all thinking, feeling and behavioral habits come from.

    Hate your job? I can guarantee there’s a thought pathway there.

    Hard time sticking to a diet? I can guarantee there’s a thought pathway there.

    Difficult relationship with your boss or anyone else? I can guarantee there’s a thought pathway there.

    Over spending. Over drinking. Chronic job hopping. Indecisiveness. I can guarantee there’s a thought pathway (or several) there.

    This is super interesting, and I think you’ll find it relevant. Now as you know, I’m not a neuroscientist, but because the certifications I have are based on principles of cognitive psychology, positive psychology and neuroscience, I study this stuff and it’s the foundation of what I teach my clients. So I’m going to take fancy words and put them into everyday language so you understand exactly how that brain of yours works.

    So, let’s dive in.

    The best place to start is by talking about our brain cells. They’re called neurons.

    Scientists say we all have about 100 billion or so. And their job is to send and receive information in your brain by connecting with other neurons.

    A Thought Pathway happens when connections form between NEURONs in your brain, because of a recurring pattern of thought. Scientists call this a neural pathway, but I like to call it a Thought Pathway because that’s the part we control – our thoughts. The neurons just do what they do when we have a recurring thought. But we’re the ones who can CONTROL or CHOOSE the thought we have.

    Thought Pathways are the science behind learning. Like always associating the word apple with the visual of the fruit.

    It’s the science behind your feelings about people, jobs, yourself. Here’s how it works.

    You have a thought about something or someone and your neurons light up and form a connection. Now, if that thought happens once and not again no pathway is formed.

    But if the thought repeats itself over and over again, it forms a pattern. A Thought Pathway.

    For example, let’s say you have a challenging meeting and there’s one colleague in particular that (at least in your mind) contributed to the challenge.

    Let’s say you had a thought (or perhaps a series of thoughts) about that colleague that ranged from judgmental to angry.

    Now if it happens once and not again, the thought is likely to be dismissed.

    But if you have a series of interactions with that person and your brain serves up a similar thought, the pathway is formed. Because your brain has now attached a meaning to that thing (your colleague).

    And now, every interaction you have with that colleague triggers that neural pathway you’ve associated with it. See how it works?

    It’s also important to know that there are dominant pathways and lesser pathways.

    The first time you have a new thought, it’s a lesser pathway. It’s not yet a habit. It’s one individual thought and a permanent association hasn’t yet happened. If you don’t think it again, a pathway is not formed.

    But the more you

    Do you have a question you'd like to have addressed on the podcast? Want to give us some feedback or suggestions? Click here to send us a text.

    Follow us on Instagram @thepurposefulcareer.
    Learn more about Next Level, our monthly membership at https://www.thepurposefulcareer.com/nextlevel.


    Ep 024: Thought Clusters (How Our Thoughts Work #2 of 4) Jun 12, 2021
    Show notes

    Well hello friends.

    I hope you guys had a good week!

    Mine has been amazing!

    June has been a month of big important (and I believe life-changing) decisions in my career and life.

    That has inspired and motivated me.

    And as a result, I’ve probably gotten more done in the past week than I have in the past three months combined.

    Though my own daily self-coaching, it’s been fun to dive in and explore the reasons for this sudden burst of motivation.

    You see, the past few years have DEFINITELY been interesting and good for me - a time of preparing and exploring and testing. But that’s now turned into a time when I start making ALL those things come true.

    Talking has turned into consistent doing.

    But why?

    Well, it really comes down to something I call Thought Clusters. I thought it was important to cover this today because it builds off last week’s episode around Thought Maintenance.

    So, if you haven’t listened to that yet, I encourage you to listen to episode 23. In that, we explore the importance of doing regular self-coaching, using the approach we teach in our practice. This helps you gain awareness in your regular patterns of thinking. And once you do, you gain awareness into the ones that SERVE you vs. the ones that DON’T.

    A SUPER important thing to do on a regular basis and especially in your career as it helps you uncover your blind spots, eliminate thinking and behavioral patterns that hold you back and allow you to CHOOSE new, empowering ones that move you forward.

    Honestly, I SO wish I’d known this stuff earlier in my career.

    And I had so many DM’s and emails from you guys this past week that I thought it would be good to dig a little deeper into the role thoughts play in our fulfillment and our level of achievement or success.

    So, this week, I wanted to talk about Thought Clusters.

    This concept was inspired by the principles behind cognitive behavior therapy, a form of psychology that is based on the belief that:

    · Problems are based, in part, on faulty or unhelpful ways of thinking.

    · And in part on learned patterns of unhelpful behavior.

    · And that you can learn to change or cope with these things through self-awareness and learning to recognize your own distortions in thinking that created the problems in the first place. And how to change it going forward.

    This type of psychology was the inspiration for the coaching method I became certified in. Which teaches you how to gain awareness of your thoughts and proactively CHOOSE to think NEW ones that empower you.

    So, the idea behind Thought Clusters was to illustrate how ONE thought becomes a CLUSTER of similar thoughts, many times each escalates or builds on the one before.

    This can work towards either the positive or the negative side.

    When it comes to the negative or downside, psychologists call this “catastrophizing” which is defined as a cognitive distortion that happens when people jump to the worst possible conclusion, usually with limited info or objection reason. Even if a situation is mildly upsetting, some can end up feeling like they are in a HUGE crisis.

    This happens because of Thought Clusters.

    One thought can multiply.

    To learn more, listen to the episode.

    Do you have a question you'd like to have addressed on the podcast? Want to give us some feedback or suggestions? Click here to send us a text.

    Follow us on Instagram @thepurposefulcareer.
    Learn more about Next Level, our monthly membership at https://www.thepurposefulcareer.com/nextlevel.


    Ep 023: Thought Maintenance (How Our Thoughts Work #1 of 4) Jun 05, 2021
    Show notes

    Before we dive into today’s episode, I wanted to share a few thoughts.

    First, I just want to say a heartfelt thank you to my regular listeners and if you’re new here, I want to welcome you and thank you for giving us a listen. We’re growing and I appreciate each one of you.

    I wanted to share a bit more about the upcoming Workshop we’re planning for June 12th. It’s called Train Your Brain. It’s going to be so great. It’s going to be a one-hour video conference via Zoom with a workbook. It’ll be recorded so if you can’t attend live, you’ll have the recording to view later. It’s going to be a great introduction to our approach. You can register by going to www.thepurposefulcareer.com/trainyourbrain. I hope we see you there. And if you have a friend, you think would be interested, please share with them.

    If you’re new to this podcast, you might be wondering what “training your brain” has to do with your career. That’s why today, I wanted to talk about Thought Maintenance. And the role it plays in your career.

    So, let’s dive in.

    So…train your brain…. thought maintenance. Not your typical career topics, I know.

    But the truth is, there is NOTHING more critical to your success or your ability to continue to next level your career than learning how to master your mind.

    Regular listeners of this podcast know that at The Purposeful Career, we use a cognitive based approach to helping people build self-confidence, drop the self-doubt, and learn how to create a career AND life they love. Our method uses the latest in neuroscience and a mash-up of cognitive and positive psychology.

    It’s a kind of Jedi Mind Trick that can give you the clarity, motivation, and steely resolve to go after HUGE dreams and bring them to life. How does it do this?

    Well, what no one tells us Because everything we achieve (or don’t), every obstacle we overcome (or don’t), every success, every disappointment, every struggle, every relationship, EVERY SINGLE THING all comes back to how we’re thinking about that thing.

    It’s not what happens to us that decides our ability to do the things we want to do or our ability to be happy or satisfied with our career or life.

    It’s not about luck. Or a good boss. Or a HUGE salary. Or the perfect company culture. Or getting the promotion. Or liking your colleagues.

    Though of course those things don’t hurt. Those are just circumstances. And sure, we LIKE IT when they go in our favor.

    It feels easier.

    But as we all know, in our career and life, MANY THINGS WON’T.

    And it’s WHAT YOU DO WITH THE THINGS THAT HAPPEN TO YOU that will ultimately determine not only your level of success. But your level of happiness or fulfillment with your life.

    How we THINK about the things that happen to us ultimately determines whether we muster the courage to try. Or the grit to keep going when it gets tough. Or the clarity to KNOW when to be grateful for what you have OR when you’re ready for more.

    When I first got exposed to this method, it was just a few years ago. I was a few decades into my career, and I just couldn’t believe the difference it made. I couldn’t help but look back at my climb up the corporate ladder and imagine how different, better, less stressful it could have been had I KNOWN this approach at the beginning.

    That’s why I do what I do. Because I want to make YOUR path easier.
    Listen to learn more.


    Do you have a question you'd like to have addressed on the podcast? Want to give us some feedback or suggestions? Click here to send us a text.

    Follow us on Instagram @thepurposefulcareer.
    Learn more about Next Level, our monthly membership at https://www.thepurposefulcareer.com/nextlevel.


    Ep 022: How to Create Any Result You Want in Your Life May 30, 2021
    Show notes

    I don’t know about you but I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that it’s already end of May. We’re almost HALFWAY through the year.

    What?

    I’m always amazed at how fast time moves.

    And for me, this is the time of year that I love to look back and reflect on where I was six months, 12 months ago and decide if I’m where I wanted or hoped I’d be at this point.

    It’s an important question because we’re never going to get what we want from our career and life if we’re not intentional bout creating it. And that’s why today, I want to talk about How to Create Any Result You Want.

    So, let’s dive in.

    Now sometimes when I ask my clients if they’re where they wanted or hoped to be at this point, they’ll say something like “I don’t know where I want to be” or “I don’t know what I want.” That’s actually really common.

    Most of us have a long list of what we DON’T want but no idea of what we DO want.

    I’m not going to talk about that today but if “I don’t know” is a thing for you, check back on this podcast next week because I’m going to announce a workshop coming up on June 12th that’ll help you move past I don’t know so you can create the success you’re looking for.

    But like I said earlier, the looking back exercise is helpful. And when I do it, I like to start by asking my clients (or myself) three questions.

    - Are you where you hoped to be at this point?

    - Are you more fulfilled in your career or life then you were 6 / 12 months ago?

    - What new skills, experiences or successes have you created in the past 6/12 months?

    Now, if you didn’t like your answers to those questions, it’s important to not judge yourself. Don’t make yourself bad or wrong. Don’t shame or blame yourself for being lazy or undisciplined or unfocused. Because that’s what so many of us do when we look back and reflect on where we’ve been.

    And that’s not helpful. What IS helpful is answering those questions and then allowing yourself to be curious about your answers. Instead of shaming or blaming yourself, be curious about why you responded the way you did.

    To learn more, check out the full episode.




    Do you have a question you'd like to have addressed on the podcast? Want to give us some feedback or suggestions? Click here to send us a text.

    Follow us on Instagram @thepurposefulcareer.
    Learn more about Next Level, our monthly membership at https://www.thepurposefulcareer.com/nextlevel.


    Ep 021: Understanding Why You Quit Things (and How to Stop) May 23, 2021
    Show notes

    Today I want to talk about Why We Quit at Things.

    Or maybe more specifically, Why We Quit on Ourselves.

    Most of us do this in one way or another. And it’s never a great thing. But for many it becomes a pattern that holds them back.

    You know what I mean.

    We start the diet determined to head into swimsuit season at our ideal weight. So, we start the diet determined and motivated. And then a few weeks or a month in, we give up.

    We decide this is the year to find the ideal job. So, we dive into the job search with gusto, land some interviews and when the rejections start rolling in, we give up.

    We start the direct sales business or other side hustle and go all in. At first. But when it gets challenging finding clients or managing the calendar, we decide it’s not meant for us; it’s too hard, so we give up.

    And there’s lots more where that came from in every area of our life – with relationships, paying off debt, working out, starting the business, changing career paths.

    Too often, we give up.

    I wanted to talk about this today because I see it all the time in my practices.

    I’ve done it too often in my own life.

    The diets I’ve started and stopped.

    My passion for writing romantic fiction which I just gave up after finishing a few books.

    Even my efforts at getting this business going. I’ve started and stopped many times.

    So, are you quitting on anything?

    If so, what?

    It’s important to remember when we quit something we really want, we’re not just quitting that thing. We’re quitting ourselves.

    And that’s why I wanted to talk about this topic today. Your goals and dreams and YOU are too important to quit on. Today we’re going to explore the whys and learn what we can do about it.

    So, let’s dive in.

    When we set a big goal or have a burning desire to do something, it feels AMAZING.

    We see the vision, imagine how amazing it will be to HAVE the new thing.

    This DESIRE gives us the motivation and excitement to get going. To START the thing believing that we can HAVE it.

    So, we fix our eyes firmly on the horizon and start moving forward.

    Then we get into it.

    And as we go, the days and months and sometimes years tick by and we start to encounter challenges.

    Obstacles.

    Rejection.

    Challenges.

    Setbacks.

    And that’s when a shift starts to happen.

    Suddenly we don’t FEEL motivated or excited.

    And maybe we can’t even connect with our DESIRE for the thing anymore.

    We just know we suddenly feel discouraged.

    Uncomfortable.

    Bored.

    Defeated.

    Because it no longer FEELS good, our discipline or pursuit of the DREAM starts to slip.

    After all, who wants to throw all their energy and effort into something that DOESN’T FEEL GOOD?

    And if these negative emotions PERSIST, we quit.

    For most of us, when we quit, we’re rewarded – at least for a little while – with HUGE feeling of relief.

    The discomfort, boredom and feelings of defeat are gone because your life can go back to NORMAL.

    We tell ourselves NORMAL is okay. We’re used to it. (Even though our life might not be what we want, it’s what we’re used to and that’s okay).

    And because we FEEL better, we tell ourselves it was GOOD that we quit.

    That the thing we were pursing wasn’t meant for us anyway.

    The problem though is that when this pattern of quitting on yourself becomes ingrained, it erodes our belief i

    Do you have a question you'd like to have addressed on the podcast? Want to give us some feedback or suggestions? Click here to send us a text.

    Follow us on Instagram @thepurposefulcareer.
    Learn more about Next Level, our monthly membership at https://www.thepurposefulcareer.com/nextlevel.


    Ep 020: How to Reframe a Bad Experience So It Doesn't Derail You May 16, 2021
    Show notes

    Today I want to talk about something most of us don’t like to talk about.

    I want to talk about bad experiences.

    Now you might be wondering WHY we’d want to talk about bad experiences.

    The truth is most of us will go to any length to avoid focusing on them.

    We’ll engage in all sorts of numbing behaviors like overeating, overdrinking, overspending, over-whatevering, just to avoid having to think about them.

    But today I want to serve up a different perspective because if you’re going to have any sort of career – whether as a corporate employee or a business owner – you’re going to experience things that you categorize as bad.

    There are so many challenging experiences our corporate career can serve up.

    · Getting passed over for promotion.

    · Toxic culture.

    · Backstabbing co-workers.

    · Bad bosses.

    · Failing at a key project.

    · Being laid off or fired.

    Or as a business owner…

    · Losing customers

    · Declining revenue

    · Problem employees

    And even for all of us around the world this past year…

    · Covid…need I say more?

    The truth is bad things happen.

    And we’re left to deal with those things.

    But the problem is, most of us DON’T.

    And that’s why today I wanted to offer you an approach that will help you flip the script on the bad experience.

    It’s going to rock your world.

    So, let’s dive in.

    A bad experience is anything that is not what we hoped of. Something that’s undesired, unpleasant, or unwelcome.

    While of course the experience can be disappointing. But at its worst, that thing can make us feel like our life is completely OUT of our control.

    And so many things in our career and life ARE out of the control.

    I mean, we know we can’t change a toxic work culture.

    We can’t make a bad or untrustworthy boss a good one.

    We can’t prevent being put on the list for a layoff.

    So, that inability to control something we don’t like can make us feel like a victim.

    Being a victim doesn’t feel good.

    After all, the definition of victim is “a person who is cheated or fooled by someone else; someone that is harmed by an unpleasant event.”

    None of us want to feel cheated or fooled or harmed.

    And when we feel that way, it doesn’t tend to bring out the best in ourselves as it relates to how we handle it.

    We might yell or scream at someone.

    We might cry.

    We might plot to do harm ourselves – gossiping, spreading untruths, blaming – to get back at the person we think caused the bad thing.

    Or we retreat into ourselves, trying to soothe the pain through indulgent or false pleasures that make feel better in the moment but in actuality, cause us even greater harm.

    Most of us do this because we believe that focusing on the bad thing that happened will make us feel even worse. We think that by running away from it, by soothing ourselves, we can avoid the pain of having to deal with the downside.

    But I’m going to offer you a different perspective.

    When something bad happens, we need to do the opposite of running away from it. We need to turn back, look directly at it, and ask ourselves how that BAD thing can be a GOOD thing.

    Or more specifically, we need to look for ways to turn that bad experience into a GIFT.
    We call it The 3 Gifts Technique. Take a listen to learn more.

    Do you have a question you'd like to have addressed on the podcast? Want to give us some feedback or suggestions? Click here to send us a text.

    Follow us on Instagram @thepurposefulcareer.
    Learn more about Next Level, our monthly membership at https://www.thepurposefulcareer.com/nextlevel.


    Ep 019: How to Be Fulfilled in Your Career May 09, 2021
    Show notes

    Today I want to talk to you about a trend that’s been growing steadily for the last several decades. And that is the degree to which we’re fulfilled at work.

    Or to be more specific, the degree to which we’re UNfulfilled.

    According to a Gallup poll conducted a few years ago, more than two thirds of workers say they’re NOT ENGAGED in their job.

    Think about that for a minute. Only one in three of us say we’re ENGAGED in the work we do?

    Wow.

    No wonder so many of us LIVE for Friday nights and despise Sundays, right?

    Honestly, that’s why I decided to release my new podcasts on Sunday. I want to give workers a little lift and some helpful perspective to add positive fuel to their workweek.

    This is something that’s universal and there’s a lot to talk about here, so let’s dive in.

    Back to the poll, I don’t think it’s an accident, that Gallup measured “engaged” vs. “fulfilled.”

    “Engaged” is a MUCH lower bar than “fulfilled” but by anyone’s standards, 33% is a really low number.

    And if they’d asked how many workers were “fulfilled” they might’ve come back with a number like 10%.

    Maybe even less.

    According to Webster’s dictionary, “engaged” means “involved in activity; occupied or busy.”

    Whereas the definition of “fulfilled” is “feeling satisfied or happy because of fully developing one’s abilities or character.”

    See the difference?

    And the problem?

    We’re not even hitting a good percentage of people who feel INVOLVED IN their job. Let alone feeling satisfied or happy.

    Obviously, that’s a huge issue for companies, because it translates into lower productivity, lackluster business results, employee turnover.

    And it’s also responsible for delivering the things so many of us complain about including bad bosses (who are probably ALSO not engaged or not engaged enough to bother to be inspiring or helpful).

    It creates toxic cultures.

    Hyper political colleagues.

    And all the other stuff that drains us of our energy and satisfaction.

    I GET IT. Trust me.

    Anyone who’s been in their career for more than a handful of years has stories to tell. And I could share many. But I want to shift our focus from what’s wrong with the workplaces of today to what we can do about it.

    And there’s plenty.

    But first a word of caution.

    When you find yourself in a situation where you feel “Unengaged” for a long period of time – when it’s about having more than just a bad or challenging week - it’s easy to assume you’re just in the wrong place.

    That it’s all about the bad boss or the toxic culture or the hyper political colleagues. Or whatever.

    Now I’m not telling you those things don’t exist.

    They do. And I know how they can affect how you feel in your job and even how effectively you perform your job.

    But here’s the problem with assuming that those things must be fixed BEFORE you can feel engaged or happy or fulfilled in your work.

    You’re NOT IN CONTROL of any of those things.

    This puts the power of your fulfillment or satisfaction in the hands of a bunch of other people who aren’t happy themselves.

    Not a great recipe for change, right?

    Sure, you could go out and find a NEW JOB – and there are many times when that IS the right answer. Like if you’re looking to grow or evolve or whatever.

    But I’m here to tell you from experience that if you change jobs solely to escape the toxicity of the one you hav

    Do you have a question you'd like to have addressed on the podcast? Want to give us some feedback or suggestions? Click here to send us a text.

    Follow us on Instagram @thepurposefulcareer.
    Learn more about Next Level, our monthly membership at https://www.thepurposefulcareer.com/nextlevel.


    Ep 018: How to Create a Significantly Up-leveled Future You May 02, 2021
    Show notes

    In last week’s episode we explored Fear of Success, a topic I think we don’t hear enough about because I know it holds so many of us back. Deeply rooted in this concept is the fear of letting go of who were used to be in favor of who we want to become.

    And that gap between past us and future us can be huge and I think too many of us leave it up to chance. This week, we’re going to talk about how to create future you. On purpose.

    So, let’s dive in.

    As humans, we’re trained to look at our past for answers and for a mirror to reflect who we are or how we see ourselves in our present.

    So, in our career, we tend to examine our past mistakes and celebrate our past successes. And it’s the combination of those two things that, for most of us, shapes our self-concept.

    Most of us are actively involved with our past selves.

    But we view the future differently. And I believe, much more passively.

    For some of us, the future is something to look forward to with excitement or anticipation.

    For others, the future is something to be feared because it involves the UNKNOWN (which we talked about in Episode 14, so check that out if you haven’t already).

    One of the things most of us have in common is that when it comes to the FUTURE, we will set goals or have dreams or mark plans for things we want to do have or experience.

    But very few of us will ever take the time to think about WHO WE WANT TO BE or who we will need to be to LIVE IT.

    Right now, I’m coaching an executive in corporate America who’s experiencing significant vertical growth.

    She’s proud of what she’s achieved but is trying to reconcile this amazing new level of success – the big title, salary, and prestige - she just achieved with her concept of herself.

    She often finds herself feeling uncomfortable.

    She finds feeling awkward or inauthentic.

    It doesn’t make sense on the surface because she’s got all the skills. She earned that level of success.

    So, what’s the problem for her?

    Well, for starters., she’s always used her past experiences and successes as a mirror for who she is. And that worked okay up till now because her progression followed a linear path.

    She moved forward one step or progressed one natural level at a time. So the growth and shifts she made were more natural or gradual and so relying on the past as a mirror for herself was believable.

    But now she finds herself in a new company in a role where she’s running the whole function. Where her team is a few hundred people and growing. Where success or failure – not just of the team but of the entire department and perhaps the company – is on her shoulders.

    She’s just experience quantum growth. There’s nothing to look back to in order to reflect who she is now. She’s creating it REAL TIME.

    So, we’re working on creating Next Level Her.

    Which I’ll tell you more about in a minute.

    I created this exercise for people experiencing quantum growth like my client is experiencing.

    Or people make the shift from function to another.

    Or people moving from corporate employee to entrepreneur.

    Or suddenly gaining national visibility or global prominence within your field.

    But honestly, it’s for everyone.

    Why?

    Because I think we have it all out of order.

    Instead of thinking about what we want to DO, HAVE or BE in the future, we would be better served by FIRST thinking of WHO WE WANT TO BECOME in the future.

    Do you have a question you'd like to have addressed on the podcast? Want to give us some feedback or suggestions? Click here to send us a text.

    Follow us on Instagram @thepurposefulcareer.
    Learn more about Next Level, our monthly membership at https://www.thepurposefulcareer.com/nextlevel.


    Ep 017: How to Move Past Fear of Success (Conquering Fear #5 of 5) Apr 25, 2021
    Show notes

    Let’s start with a definition. In the simplest of terms, Fear of Success involves the fear of GETTING the very things that you want.

    What?!!?

    I know. I know. It makes no sense logically.

    But as you dig into it, there are actually three big themes that come up around Fear of Success.

    1. Fear of Isolation that comes from the success. This is about the fear of what it means to be “different” from friends and family. It’s our primitive fear of being cast out of the tribe. It can also be in part concern around what it would mean to surpass someone that you admire. This is all about the fear of how your success will change your relationships with others that you know and love. And maybe a little about the guilt associated with WANTING a level of success that moves you away from people you love.

    a. Will I still have friends, or will I be all alone?

    b. Why can’t I just settle for what everyone else has and is?

    2. Fears around the consequences of having the success. This is about the new situations you’ll be in that you might not be equipped to deal with. And it can also be about the fact that being more successful makes you more of a target. So, with that comes concerns over what other people will think about you and/or say about you. And it’s about your own concerns about whether you’ll be ‘good enough.’

    a. Will I be able to handle it?

    b. What if I’m not good enough?

    3. Fears around your ability to keep the success. Many times, we know we can be successful in getting the thing we want, but we worry that if we DO achieve the success, we’ll be a one hit wonder. That we won’t be able to duplicate it. And then we catastrophize (which we talked about last week) and worry we’ll end up homeless and living under a bridge.

    a. What if I can’t KEEP being successful?

    b. Will I lose everything? (my job, my money, my business, my family, and friends)?

    Bottom line, when you strive to become and do more than maybe the family you were raised in or the friends you have, the stakes get raised.

    The success you want will always comes more responsibility. And with more responsibility there comes more pressure. More work. More demands. More expectations. More things to learn. More obstacles.

    Another way the stakes get raised is that more success means doing more things you’ve never done before and that brings an increased possibility of…you guessed it…failure. But not regular failure that you might fear now, but failure with higher stakes. Next level failure. Failing when you’re more visible. When you have more to lose.

    The problem with Fear of Success is that many times we don’t understand that’s what is really happening.
    Check out the full episode to learn more.

    Do you have a question you'd like to have addressed on the podcast? Want to give us some feedback or suggestions? Click here to send us a text.

    Follow us on Instagram @thepurposefulcareer.
    Learn more about Next Level, our monthly membership at https://www.thepurposefulcareer.com/nextlevel.


    Ep 016: How to Reframe Fear of Failure (Conquering Fear #4 of 5) Apr 18, 2021
    Show notes

    Fear of Failure is the irrational fear that we won’t succeed at doing something that’s important to us.

    This fear happens when we have thoughts that overestimate the risks that we associate with attempting to DO the new thing.

    These irrational risk-based thoughts create feelings of fear, which cause us to engage in avoiding behaviors like procrastination, hiding, playing small and a host of other self-limiting actions.

    So first, let’s look at what we mean by ‘overestimating the risks’ we associate with trying something new.

    This tends to crop up when we’re trying something we don’t yet have experience in doing.

    I mean think about it. If we feel competent at something because we’ve done it before, we have every reason to believe we can do it again.

    This is where confidence comes from. It comes from looking at our past and knowing what we ‘for sure’ have successfully done.

    If the new thing we want to go do is similar or the same as things we’ve already done before, we’re confident in our competence at doing the thing. So, `we likely won’t sink into Fear of Failure.

    But when we DON’T have experience with the new thing we want to try or go do, that’s when we tend to overestimate the risks of doing the thing.

    Psychologists refer to this as Catastrophizing.

    There are two types. Catastrophizing about current or future situations.

    Catastrophizing is when we imagine the worst thing that could happen, or we exaggerate the difficulties we’ll face in doing the thing.

    The problem with catastrophizing is that we tend to enlarge the challenge.

    This is because we’ll start with an observation of a potentially difficult thing.

    Then this leads to a cascade of follow-on thoughts, each getting potentially larger.
    For more, check out the full episode.

    Do you have a question you'd like to have addressed on the podcast? Want to give us some feedback or suggestions? Click here to send us a text.

    Follow us on Instagram @thepurposefulcareer.
    Learn more about Next Level, our monthly membership at https://www.thepurposefulcareer.com/nextlevel.


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