Stop Wanting Him Back & Find Someone Better

Latest Episodes:

When You Break The No Contact Rule May 24, 2021

Show notes

I am fired up about this episode because just this week I had not one, but two clients break the no contact rule and they reached out to their exes. It happens to the best of us. And really, falling off the wagon at some point is going to happen to all of us. Healing your heart isn’t easy, and at some point, we all slip up and go back to what is familiar. The key is to be on to ourselves and be aware of the thoughts that cause us to take the actions we do. In this episode, I detail what happened with my clients, how I coached them to identify why they wanted to reach out to their exes in the first place, and how they move through this in order to continue healing their hearts.

This is just some of the work that I do with my clients in my one-year coaching program, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better. This work is hard, and in order to truly heal your heart and find someone better, you need a coach that will be on to your thoughts, see your blindspots, and call you out, with love, when you veer off track. If you are looking to stop wanting Mr. or Ms. Wrong back, fall in love with yourself, and be with your ideal partner, I invite you to apply to the program here: https://course.clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/

Topics In This Episode

Why cutting contact is the most crucial step in healing your heart
Ending the judgement you have for the actions you take
The action is neutral. The meaning they want to make of it, is a different story
Examining what are you telling yourself in order to feel better about falling off the wagon
Cultivating true awareness of our thoughts
What you’re giving up if you won’t cut contact
Slowing down when we’re triggered
False validation

PLEASE NOTE: Claire refers to her exes and the listener’s ex as a “he,” based on her own personal experience as a heterosexual female, but this work can be applied to ANYONE going through heartbreak. ALL genders and sexual orientations are encouraged to listen and apply Claire’s tools into their own lives!

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Normalizing Sadness May 17, 2021

Show notes

As a life coach, I think there is this perception that because I have the skills of thought work, have committed to doing the work, and teach it to others, that I have mastered my mind. In this episode I want to be really vulnerable and share with you that I have been really sad recently, and it took me a long time to figure out why. What makes self-coaching so difficult is that it is nuanced, and that is why I continue to get coached. Join me as I share with you the process I went through to identify what was making me sad and how I’m showing up for myself through this time.

Sometimes our work is to allow the sadness and really create space for our feelings. Other times our work is to move away from the sadness, change our thoughts, and really shift our mood. And honestly, it can be difficult to know how to make the right call and know which is best. This is why I highly recommend getting a coach. In my program, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better, you get access to a library of over 60 videos where I take you through the process so that you can stop wanting him back, fall in love with you, and find someone better. To learn more and apply, go to: https://course.clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/

Topics In This Episode

Why awareness of our brains is key
Our brains can be sneaky bitches
Signs that you truly love yourself
The discomfort that comes with growth, and moving through it in order to achieve our results
Identifying the root cause
Supplementary tools to help with healing
Checking in with ourselves in the pain

Resources

Jamie’s Guide on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jamiesguide/

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Clarity On Closure May 10, 2021

Show notes

How do we know when we are really over our ex and ready to find someone better? A lot of times we tell ourselves that in order to really close the book on our heartbreak, we need closure. We need for that person to tell us how sorry they are for whatever has happened, and once we get that from them, we’ll be ready to let go and move on. What if you could get closure without them? This is something I was working on with a client this week and in this episode, I share with you how we can redefine closure, create it for ourselves, and live our best lives, no matter what.

Closure is step three in my five step process in order to create the results of stop wanting Mr. Wrong back, fall in love with yourself, and find someone better. If you are interested in taking your love life and your entire life to the next level, I invite you to join my one-year group coaching program, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better. With me as your coach, I teach you to cultivate awareness and get to the crux of your thoughts, so that you can heal your pain. To learn more and apply, go to:https://course.clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/

Topics In This Episode

What we think closure is versus what it actually is
Something I see women do that keeps them in pain for longer
How I got closure from my rock bottom heartbreak
Why acceptance feels so difficult in the heartbreak
Looking at the best kind of closure
Examining our levels of commitment to ourselves
He can’t give you your best life. Only you can give you your best life

Resources

Episode, My Heartbreak Story

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She's Damned If He Does, She's Damned If He Doesn't May 03, 2021

Show notes

Over some of the recent episodes of this show, I have talked about the importance of cutting contact with your ex, and why it is the first step in my five-steps of how to heal your heart. Let’s say you have done the difficult thing of cutting contact and blocking them, but your Mr. or Ms. Wrong is finding a way to still get in contact with you. If you’re like my client Jane, you may be feeling anxious when they call, but when they aren’t calling, you’re feeling anxious then too. You’re torn, and confused, and not sure how to handle all these feelings. In this episode, we really investigate how you can examine your thoughts and anxiety, and how to move through this pain in order to continue healing your heart and find someone better.

If cutting contact feels too difficult for you, I would say that is an excellent reason for getting coached, and why my program is exactly what you need. In Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better, I teach you the skills of the thought work and coach you through the pain. I won’t sugar coat it and say that this will be easy, because it won’t. But with me as your coach, the group coaching calls, and over 60 videos in the resource library, you will get over your ex, fall in love with you, and call in the love of your life. To learn more and apply to my program, go to: https://course.clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/

Topics In This Episode

What is possible for you
The times when you should not do the thought work
Where our pain actually comes from, and what we can do about it
Lessons our triggers teach us
Becoming aware of our thoughts
The freedom on the other side when we allow the pain

Resources

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Your Ability To Receive Apr 26, 2021

Show notes

Let’s talk about our ability to receive. This topic comes from a coaching client who recently came to our coaching and shared that she is finding it really difficult to receive a gift that was offered to her. When we dig into the hard work of upleveling ourselves and healing our hearts, I have seen with many of my clients that the universe recognizes the work and provides abundance and opportunity. However, because of the heartbreak we’ve experienced, it’s not always easy to lean into the opportunity and be able to receive what is being offered. In this episode, I walk you through how to take inventory of where you may be over-giving to others, where you should give to yourself, and how to receive the love you deserve.

There is a reason you haven’t found Mr. Right yet. If you want to get coached to stop wanting Mr. Wrong, fall in love with you, and find someone better, apply to join my one-year coaching program, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better. This program has over 60 videos, weekly group coaching calls, and the opportunity to Write a Coach and get answers to your questions in 24 hours. To learn more, go to: https://course.clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/

Topics in this episode

Coaching you through cutting contact with your ex
Why you’re attracting unavailable men
Dating yourself, and what that may look like for you
My thoughts on casual sex for my clients
Where are you not giving to yourself?
Investigating the thoughts that make us uncomfortable
Behaviors that show the universe that you are unavailable

Editing and show notes by Roth Media

Two Types Of Dating Triggers Apr 19, 2021

Show notes

Let’s talk about triggers. In the world of dating, there are more than just two types of triggers, but for the purpose of this episode, we will be focusing on two: the kind you have when are dating Mr. Wrong and the kind you have when you are dating Mr. Right. This episode was inspired by a recent coaching call with a client who is starting to date again, and is really interested in this guy she’s dating, even when there are triggers for her that he may not be the Mr. Available she wants him to be.

Triggers and fear are both totally normal, even when you are dating or even in a relationship with Mr. or Ms. Right. In this episode, we take a look at the different types of triggers, how to identify and call out problematic behavior, and how to love yourself through the fear and through those moments of being triggered. You deserve a reciprocal relationship of love, consistency, effort, and commitment. The question that comes down to you is, are you willing to lean in and do the work so that you can live in the result of an epic love story? Because it is waiting for you on the other side.

For those of you who are interested in doing this work and healing your heart, I invite you to apply to my group coaching, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better. In the group coaching, you have access to 3 live coaching calls a week and you can write in with a question and get a response within 24 hours. You also have access to over 60 videos where I teach you the tools you need to set yourself up for success in order to reach the three results in my program: stop wanting him back, fall in love with you, and find someone better. To learn more and apply, go to: https://course.clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/

Topics in this episode

The worst thing you can do after a break up
What it looks like when you are avoiding the healing
Getting closure and empowerment
Signs he’s not available
Answering the question: “What if I get scared?”
Identifying hot and cold behavior
Unavailable men won’t tell you that they are unavailable. But their actions will.

Resources

Episode, Taking a Dump On Your Love Story

Episode, Heartbreak in Your Ideal Relationship

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Your Feelings Matter Most Apr 12, 2021

Show notes

Your thoughts, create feelings, which drive results. This is the model I use as a coach and when I get coached. In this episode, I share with you just how important your feelings are, and how they can shape your results. Let’s take a look at how you may not be fully loving yourself right now, what this means for your love life, those you are attracting, and how to investigate the feelings that may be driving your actions.

This work is so much deeper than simply getting over Mr. Wrong. If you are ready to get started and apply to join my one-year group coaching program, go to https://course.clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/. I truly believe this is the work that I am meant to do. In this group coaching, there are over 60 videos on how to stop wanting Mr. Wrong, fall the fuck in love with you, and call in Mr. Right. If you are willing to commit to this work, I can’t wait to see you inside.

Topics in this episode

Examining the type of love we attract
What it looks like to date yourself
How emotional pain is manifested
The time it takes to heal your heart
Creating that Hollywood love story
What this work requires of you
Looking for evidence to show you that the work is working

Resources

One-year Group Coaching: https://course.clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/
Follow Me On Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/clairetheheartbreakcoach/
Episode 5, My Heartbreak Story
Dr. Joe Dispenza, Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself: https://www.amazon.com/Breaking-Habit-Being-Yourself-Create/dp/1401938094

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The Pain is Worth the GAIN! Apr 05, 2021

Show notes

I am so excited for the full launch of my one-year group coaching, which starts this Friday, April 9th. For this episode, I have asked three students who took advantage of the opportunity to join early to come on the podcast and talk about what it has been like for them to get coached in this way and why it works. You’ll hear from each of them as they share why they joined the program, what it’s like to be in the group setting, and what the work looks like for each of them. I am so honored to have these women on the podcast and to be their coach.

If you are ready to get started and make the commitment to heal your heart, fall in love with you, and find someone better, subscribe to my website to get all the details https://clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/.

Topics in this episode

Growth is hard. But it’s also hard to be stuck in your heartbreak.
Identifying ways you may be hating on yourself
“It feels like everyone is getting married”
Gaining confidence in being heartbroken and moving through the heartbreak
How easy it is to do the thought models wrong - and why you need a coach
The differences between coaching and therapy
Doing this work may look different than you expect it to

Resources

Gay Hendricks, The Big Leap
Jenn Sincero, You Are a Badass at Making Money
Brook Castillo, The Lifecoach School Podcast: https://thelifecoachschool.com/podcasts/

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He's Giving Her Everything I Wanted Mar 29, 2021

Show notes

I was recently working with two clients who were going through the same thing; their Mr. Unavailable’s are in new relationships, and from the outside, it looks like they are now Mr. Available to their new partners, and are now able to give the best of themselves in the new relationships. Even in my own dating history, I can look back and see examples of men who committed to new partners and were able to give them everything I wanted. In this episode, let’s take a deeper look into this thought. Is everything what it seems? Does it matter? And how does this create the container to be able to find who is right for you?

The work starts with you. The three results you will get from my coaching are to stop wanting him back, fall authentically in love with you, and find someone better. If you are ready to take this to the next level, my group coaching officially launches on April 9th. If you are a current student of my course, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better, and want to upgrade to the one-year group coaching experience, email me at hello@clairetheheartbreakcoach.com in order to get early access to the group coaching calls and get a jumpstart.

Topics In This Episode

The awareness necessary to identify thoughts and truths
Recognizing that we can decide what it means about us
It all comes back to what you think about you
The work that it takes for true change
How these thoughts are preventing you from creating your results

Resources

Episode, My Heartbreak Story
Instagram: @clairetheheartbreakcoach

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Get Your Hopes Up Mar 22, 2021

Show notes

Having hope is very tricky. How many times have you been looking forward to a date, but then stopped yourself from “getting your hopes up”? This happened recently when I was working with a client. When she told me she didn’t want to get her hopes up for a first date, I asked her why the hell not? It is so natural to have hope, but there are also times when hope doesn’t serve us. I share with you how to tell the difference between when hope is helpful, versus when it isn’t, and how you should apply this to create the result of finding your person.

I also want to remind you that my course, Stop Wanting Him Back and Find Someone Better is going away very soon and will be replaced by my one-year group coaching program with the same name. If you are a current course student, you have a window of time between now and April 9th, to upgrade to the one-year group coaching program. You even get early access to the group coaching calls!

To take advantage of this opportunity, send an email to hello@clairetheheartbreakcoach.com. The one-year group coaching opportunity officially launches on April 9th. For official details, be sure you are subscribed to my website at https://clairetheheartbreakcoach.com/

Topics In This Episode

You don’t need hope. You need commitment.
The difference between having hope for a date, and hope for creating your results.
Where we can allow the hope to come in
Don’t stop looking and doing the work
When we think we know what we want, but we don’t
The willingness to feel disappointed over and over again
Exploring what is happening when you get ghosted, and what that means about you

Editing and show notes by Roth Media