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Niyc Pidgeon believes, all the way down, that she is always going to be okay. That belief carried her through more than most people will ever name out loud. It also got her comfortable holding more pain than she needed to, for longer than she needed to. She calls that her survival story, and it is the one she says she is ready to put down.
We spend the first half on something I have never heard anyone explain this cleanly. When life hits and you still have twenty people waiting on a Zoom call, what are you actually doing when you put the game face on? Niyc names it as dissociation and does not apologize for it. Her point is that dissociation is not the failure. Not going back is the failure. She schedules the return trip. Music, usually, at the end of the day, to get out of strategy and back into her body.
I put a generalization to her and she pushed on it. Men tend to regulate so well they slide into suppression. Women are more often described as flooding. Niyc does a third thing, which is regulate on purpose and then return on purpose. She added the part I had missed, which is that this depends on capacity, and there have been long stretches where she did not have it.
Niyc has a masters in positive psychology, wrote Now Is Your Chance, built the Positive Psychology Coach Academy, made a course with Tony Robbins, and has done policy work on suicide prevention. She is also in the same PhD program I am in, studying integral and transpersonal psychology. Her research question is what commonly stops people and what it actually takes to become unstoppable, with a focus on the trauma people carry behind a business nobody sees the back of.
She talks about her mother's nervous breakdown when Niyc was five, and what it does to a kid who learns she has to fight to be loved. Everyone said she would be all right. She was. That is exactly the problem she is unpicking now.
Then the second half turns, and we get into the part she is genuinely great at. Surrender, the dark night of the soul, why she loosened her grip on a life she was obsessed with, and the difference between being it and faking it.
A note before you listen. Niyc speaks openly about a suicide attempt as a child, about losing twelve friends before they turned thirty, and about suicidal ideation returning during hard seasons. She is careful and clear about all of it. If that is a difficult subject for you right now, please take care of yourself. Resources are at the bottom.
IN THIS EPISODE
0:00
Welcome And Why Nick Stands Out
7:35
Trauma History And The Unstoppable Question
13:30
Dissociation Versus Healthy Resilience
20:05
Making Space To Feel Again
26:00
PTSD Capacity Limits And Honest Mirrors
32:05
The Stories That Drive Survival
37:45
Strengths With Shadows And Radical Honesty
44:30
Surrender Dark Night And Changing Environment
51:35
Compounding Habits And Audacious Goals
58:30
Reading Alignment Intuition And Opportunities
1:02:35
Where To Find Nick And Closing
FIND NIYC PIDGEON
Instagram is where she actually hangs out: @niycpidgeon
Website: niycpidgeon.com
Book: Now Is Your Chance
Certification: Positive Psychology Coach Academy
FIND ME
Take the free quiz that names the pattern running your life: https://quiz.humanuniversity.com
Join a free Wednesday room at 3:30pm ET: https://nextlevelhuman.com/human-conversations
Read the newsletter: https://substack.nextlevelhuman.com
If you are struggling, you can reach the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline in the US by calling or texting 988. In the UK, Samaritans is free on 116 123. Nothing in this episode is medical advice or a substitute for care.
Connect with Next Level Human
Website: www.nextlevelhuman.com
support@nextlevelhuman.com
Connect with Dr. Jade Teta
Website: www.jadeteta.com
Instagram: @jadeteta
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