Fragmented to Whole: Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery

Latest Episodes:

How and Why to Stop Dragging the Story with You | Episode 111 Jun 07, 2021

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When I stopped gossiping, I realized that I'd been "dragging stories with me" all my life. And it was making me miserable! It's bad enough that negative stuff happens, but you MAGNIFY the negativity by talking about it all the time! You relive the negative events over and over each time you talk about them. Here's how to stop so you can reduce the amount of chaos and negativity in your life.

You can sign up for the FREE 3-Day Workplace Boundaries Challenge I mentioned here: www.facebook.com/groups/boundarieswithbarb
Please follow me on Instagram @HigherPowerCoaching.
Be sure to leave a rating on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen (it helps other people who need this info to find me!).
Visit me on my website: www.HigherPowerCC.com.

And be sure to check out ALL the podcasts produced under the Baobab Tree at https://www.baobabtreestories.com

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<Audio> Guest Episode - Codependency with Gail | Episode 110 Jun 01, 2021

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Gail Ferguson Jones is a recovering codependent and host of the podcast "The Buttrfly Effect" (no "e"), which is for families of addicts. She shares her experience having grown up with multiple generations of alcoholism and being married to an alcoholic.

Gail dropped all kinds of pearls of wisdom on this show. Here are just a few gems.

“This is why [codependence is] also called co-addiction. Even though I didn’t have a drinking problem, I was sharing in all the chaos and dysfunction that went with it.”
“The pain is always the thing that makes us rethink…pain is a good thing, because otherwise I wouldn’t have changed.”
“HE wasn't making me lose myself, I surrendered MY OWN power. It took a few years and a diagnosis of PTSD, that turned things around for me.”
"When we prioritize [their drinking and behavior], it’s because we’re concerned with what other people are going to think if I abandon him now…or 'she has this great life, what’s the matter with her?'"

Here's a link to Gail's podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/buttrfly-effect-podcast/id1518404338

Please follow me on Instagram @HigherPowerCoaching.
Be sure to leave a rating on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen (it helps other people who need this info to find me!).
Visit me on my website: www.HigherPowerCC.com.
And check out all the shows created under the Baobab Tree @www.baobabtreestories.com

★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

How to Stop Abandoning Yourself So You Can Get Over Your Fear of Abandonment | Episode 109 May 24, 2021

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Most of us in recovery fear abandonment, yet ironically, most of us abandon ourselves. We do this because of the chaos and dysfunction with which we grew up. The key is to stop abandoning yourself, which essentially means to learn how to take good care of yourself. This is the essence of what recovery is - learning to take good care of ourselves. I go into a couple of examples of how to stop abandoning ourselves and why it's so important. I also go into the astonishing impact it has on our relationships when we stop abandoning ourselves.

Here's the link if you're interested in having a free 30-minute Better Boundaries call with me: www.BetterBoundarieswithBarb.com
Please follow me on Instagram @HigherPowerCoaching.
Be sure to leave a rating on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen (it helps other people who need this info to find me!).
Visit me on my website: www.HigherPowerCC.com.

Check out all the shows produced under the Baobab Tree at www.baobabtreestories.com

★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

How to Increase Your Integrity by Getting Clear on Your Intentions | Episode 108 May 18, 2021

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Your integrity is impacted by your motives because our motives guide our behavior. We may THINK we're doing something to be nice, when in fact we're doing it to manipulate. This shatters our integrity because our intentions are not pure - we're not living up to the spiritual principles we may think we are (like being kind and good).

It's also important to consider that others don't care what your intentions are, they only care about the impact of your behavior. I give several suggestions for how to get clear on your intentions and bring your behavior in line with good intentions.

Check out ALL the shows under the Baobab Tree at https://www.baobabtreestories.com

★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Importance of Boundaries in 12-Step Recovery: Learning from the Outside In | Episode 107 May 10, 2021

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There are several means by which 12-step recovery programs impose boundaries on us. These include the Serenity Prayer, program slogans, several common meeting practices, as well as seven of the 12 Traditions. By having these healthy boundaries imposed from the outside first, we learn to form healthy boundaries of our from inside.

The episode I referred to on boundaries of self-containment and boundaries of self-protection is episode 48 (I mistakenly said 43 on the podcast!). It's available here: https://higherpowercc.com/2020/11/05/fragmented-to-whole-podcast-48-boundaries-of-self-containment-and-self-protection/

Please follow me on Instagram @HigherPowerCoaching.
Be sure to leave a rating on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen (it helps other people who need this info to find me!)
Visit me on my website: www.HigherPowerCC.com.

★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

How to Overcome Victim Mentality Even If You've Been Victimized | Episode 106 May 03, 2021

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People who have been victimized don't necessarily take on the mentality of victimhood. That is, they've been through something, but they don't always take on the identity of being a victim. Victims perceive themselves as not having choices. Victimization is about a situation; victimhood is an identity.

The way to overcome this mentality is to first see that you have it. I describe a variety of ways in which this mentality shows up. Once you're aware you have victim mentality you'll see choices where you never saw them before. To move away from that mentality, actively seeking options will shift your perspective so you can see that you actually do have choice.

If you like the show and want to be a support consider becoming a patron at https://www.patreon.com/higherpowercoaching

Check out all the podcasts shared under the Baobab tree at https://www.baobabtreestories.com

★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

How to Turn Your Life Around: From Obstacles to Detours | Episode 105 Apr 26, 2021

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The universe is FOR you, not against you. There is wisdom in the universe beyond your understanding. When things pop up that feel like they're obstacles on your path, they're really just detours. If you think back over your life you'll see that to be true. Why wait to gain the perspective of time to realize that what you thought was an obstacle was really a detour? You can do that now with a simple decision. Listen in to hear more.

Here's a link to my 3-month group coaching program, "Better Boundaries with Barb" which starts next week. https://higherpowercc.com/betterboundaries/

The other podcast episode I mentioned "Making Things Mean Things That They Don't" is #59 and can be found here: https://higherpowercc.com/2020/11/05/fragmented-to-whole-podcast-59-making-things-mean-things-that-they-dont/

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How Fear and Telling the Truth Can Lead You to Wholeness | Episode 104 Apr 19, 2021

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Hear my story of uncovering a fear that I could feel bubbling up like a pressure cooker. I managed that fear by telling the truth - and I didn't die! (not kidding!). My pattern of dishonesty over the years reared it's ugly head. Not giving into that fear and being honest about it reinforced my integrity, which means it reinforced my wholeness. The same is true for you - tell the truth, it will lead to your wholeness.

The podcast episode I mentioned today is #67 and you can find it here: https://higherpowercc.com/2020/11/05/fragmented-to-whole-podcast-67-why-we-say-the-truth-shall-set-you-free/

Please follow me on Instagram and Facebook @HigherPowerCoaching.
Be sure to leave a rating on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen (it helps other people who need this info to find me!).
Visit me on my website: www.HigherPowerCC.com.

★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

How to Go from Black-and-White Thinking to Seeing the Gray | Episode 103 Apr 12, 2021

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Most people in recovery have or have had lives filled with chaos on dysfunction. When we're surrounded by chaos, we're frequently "activated" as if on alert, which means it's hard to think clearly. One of the ways our thinking gets distorted is that we see things only in stark contrast - like the stark contrast between the colors black and white. In order to be able to see and experiences the nuances of life (the gray area) we have to slow down, stop dissociating and become calm. Reaching out to others to get feedback on our perspective is also helpful. Learn more in this episode.

You might also find these episodes helpful:
#8 Learning to Pause
#9 Reaching Out to Others
BONUS episode: What to Do When You're Triggered (between ep # 93 and #94)

Please contact me at barb@higherpowercc.com or DM on Instagram or Facebook @HigherPowerCoaching
Be sure to leave a rating on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen (it helps other people who need this info to find me!).
Visit me on my website: www.HigherPowerCC.com

★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Why Keeping the Focus on Yourself is the Antidote to Codependence | Episode 102 Apr 05, 2021

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Codependence is a focus outside the self. This happens because when we're in fight or flight mode, we're not able to access the "human" part of our brain. That part of our brain is where our "self" is formed. Setting healthy boundaries is the best way to keep the focus on yourself to get over your codependence. You'll also hear the top two myths about setting boundaries as well as my top five rules for setting boundaries.

Here's a link to my calendar for a 30-minute Better Boundaries call: https://calendly.com/barb-nangle/better-boundaries-call

If you'd like to learn more about my 12-week Group Coaching Program, "Better Boundaries with Barb" you can check it out here: https://higherpowercc.com/betterboundaries/

Please follow me on Instagram @HigherPowerCoaching. Be sure to leave a rating on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen (it helps other people who need this info to find me!). Visit me on my website: www.HigherPowerCC.com.

★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

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