Fragmented to Whole: Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery

How to Understand What a Spiritual Awakening Is and Three Personal Examples | Episode 219 Jul 03, 2023

Show notes

The whole point of the 12 steps of recovery is to have a spiritual awakening and a spiritual awakening means we have changed. As a result of my recovery, I can be, see, think, do and have that which I could not before recovery. This week’s episode 219 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how to understand what a spiritual awakening is and sharing three of my personal examples!

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In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing what the different varieties of experiencing a spiritual awakening look like and 3 instances that happened in my recovery journey that, looking back, I am now able to understand were spiritual awakenings.

I want to hear from you! What is a spiritual awakening you’ve had in your life?

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

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My Vulnerable Share About Family Dysfunction and How It Results In Trauma | Episode 218 Jun 26, 2023

Show notes

{Content Warning: This episode has emotional mentions of abuse.}

The thing with trauma is that sometimes it can pop up and trigger us when we’re not expecting it. Last week, I attended a concert that brought up a lot of emotional trauma for me, and inspired by others in recovery, I decided to record my vulnerable thoughts and emotions in real-time to share with you. This week’s episode 218 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about my vulnerable share of family dysfunction and how it results in trauma.

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In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the raw and emotional story of the time my dad tried to strangle me when I was just 17 and how I have since come to understand that I DID NOT deserve that, despite my previous beliefs that his actions were a justified response to my behavior.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

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Why Pausing Is So Important and What To DO When You Pause | Episode 217 Jun 19, 2023

Show notes

Ep 126. How Understanding Your Part in Things Brings You Out of Victim Mentality

One of the big tasks in recovery is going from being a reactor to an actor in life, or to act ON life rather than reacting to it. This is huge and is another way of coming out of the victim mentality we often find ourselves living in. This week’s episode 217 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about why pausing is so important and what to do when you pause!

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In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing examples of times when I was able to recognize that I was reacting rather than acting on life and how my tools from recovery allowed me to pause in those moments. I also share the techniques I use while I am pausing to re-ground myself and the language I use with others when I need to pause.

The end goal here is to get to a state in which you can think clearly and make decisions about how you want to live your life so that you can live your life on purpose. That is the power of the pause.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Ep 8. My Tools of Recovery Part I: Pausing

Victim Mentality episodes

Ep 3. Victim mentality

Ep 106. How to overcome victim mentality even if you’ve been victimized

152. How to Stop Taking Things Personally and Come Out of Victim Mentality

172. Seven steps to coming out of victim mentality

176. What Is the Dreaded Drama Triangle and How to Get Out of It

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What It Means to Be Powerless Over the Effects of Alcoholism | Episode 216 Jun 12, 2023

Show notes

What I've learned in ACA (Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families) is that the effects of alcoholism get passed down through the generations. Because of this, we often talk about alcoholism as a family disease because the effects are embedded in the relationships surrounding the alcoholic, affecting everyone, not just the person abusing alcohol. This week’s episode 216 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about what it means to be powerless over the effects of alcoholism!

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In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the first step in every 12-step program: admitting we are powerless over something and that our lives have become unmanageable because of it, as well as actionable steps you can take right now to recognize this powerlessness and give it up to your higher power.

Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:

Coming to recognize that I was living in a constant state of fear my entire life.
Examples of some of the distorted thinking that comes from growing up in a dysfunctional family.
The monumental task with incredible benefits that learning to reach out and ask for help did for me.
What it means to be powerless over fear and distorted thinking and what we can do about them.

We are always going to be powerless over the fears and distorted thinking we have but if we stay in recovery and learn to hand our fears and our thoughts over to our higher power, they will reduce dramatically.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Ep 9. My Tools of Recovery Part II: Reaching Out

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How to Discover Your Real Identity and Authenticity by Building Healthy Boundaries | Episode 215 Jun 05, 2023

Show notes

When it comes to growing up in a dysfunctional family, we didn’t have the opportunity to form our true, authentic identity because we were so corrupted by the dysfunction. Now, of course, there are certain elements of us that are true and real and have always been there but there are other parts of our identity that we create as we come out of the dysfunction. This week’s episode 215 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about discovering your real identity and authenticity by building healthy boundaries!

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In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing why many of us who grew up in dysfunctional families have been people-pleasing for so long. The result is that we truly do not know what it means to be authentic. I also share how building healthy boundaries allows us to finally become our true selves. Living as your most authentic self means figuring out your values and then living in alignment with those values.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

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The Foundations of Recovery- Honesty, Open-Mindedness and Willingness | Episode 214 May 29, 2023

Show notes

When I first got into recovery my sponsor told me, ‘If you’re not honest with me I can’t help you. You’ve got to be open-minded to the idea that there are things you don’t know and willing to do the things you’ve never done before to succeed in recovery.” This week’s episode 214 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about the foundations of recovery- honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness!

Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!

In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the 3 fundamentals of H.O.W. to recover- honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness and how I came to understand and follow each one of these and began living in alignment.

Ask yourself, are you willing to do things that people around you in recovery have done in order to have the life you want? Honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness are the foundation of recovery so if you don’t already have them, you have to be willing to look inward and seek them.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

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How We Become Approval Seekers and How to Get Out of It | Episode 213 May 22, 2023

Show notes

Many of us have grown up feeling that we have to do things for others so they won’t dislike us, get mad at us, leave us, or even abuse us. We then get so deeply ingrained in this behavior pattern that we think the only way we will be okay is by getting the approval of other people. This week’s episode 213 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how we become approval seekers and how to get out of it!

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In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the importance of recognizing when you’re acting as an approval-seeker as a manipulation tactic and actionable steps you can take right now to transition into the type of person that lives their life for themselves and on their own terms.

Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:

How we develop approval-seeking behavior.
The difference between being kind and helpful and being a self-sacrificing person.
Why approval seeking is much more than doing the right thing for someone, it’s manipulative.
Steps to go from a lifetime of approval-seeking to being someone who cares so much less about what other people think of them.

Part of the process of coming out of being an approval seeker is learning to give a shit about yourself and what you think, need, and want. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Ep 161. How to Care More What You Think of Yourself Than What Others Do

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Nine New Methods I've Learned for Reparenting and How They've Affected Me | Episode 212 May 15, 2023

Show notes

As I’ve mentioned previously, I am still (and forever will be) on a journey to reparent myself. Between the last time I did an episode on this topic and now, I have made some really radical and impactful internal changes that have made an enormous difference in my life. This week’s episode 212 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about nine new methods I’ve learned for reparenting and how they’ve affected me!

Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!

In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the importance of connecting deeply to your inner child and actionable steps you can use to heal your inner child's wounds.

The nine new methods I use that I share in this episode include:

Making consistent, conscious contact with your inner family members.
Make small promises to your inner child and keep them.
Get a picture of your inner child or inner teenager to make conscious contact.
Find a safe place in your mind where you can go and feel safe with your inner family.
Bring your inner critical parent to your safe place with you and see what happens.
Play with toys, do a craft, or listen to music as a way to connect with your inner child and tap into those feelings.
Allow your inner child and/or inner teenager to safely express their feelings and then soothe and affirm them as they do it.
Interact lovingly with your inner critical parent so they see if there’s an inner loving parent present and are more likely to step aside than if you were to try to strong-arm them into giving up their role.
Stop resisting and feel the damn feelings.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Ep. 181. 5 Methods for Reparenting Myself: What That Looks Like for Me

Ep. 205. 24 Ways Adult Child Traits Show Up in The Workplace – Part 1

Ep. 206. 24 Ways Adult Child Traits Show Up in The Workplace - Part 2

Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families (ACA or ACOA)

Adult Child podcast episode with Susan Anderson “The Outer Child and Abandonment Trauma”

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What Life is Like Before and After Building Healthy Boundaries | Episode 211 May 08, 2023

Show notes

Bonus Episode: Coaching with Barb

If you had told me years ago that boundaries were my issue, I would have never believed you. It is for that reason that I shape my content around helping others understand that their issues can be cleaned up and healed by learning to set and maintain healthy boundaries. This week’s episode 211 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about what life is like before and after building healthy boundaries!

Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!

In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing real testimonials from clients I’ve worked with in the past to illustrate what life was like before and after working with me to implement healthy boundaries in their lives.

Some of the things I have helped my clients work through are:

Speaking up about boundaries in the moment and setting them in a kind and respectful manner.
Getting out of self-doubt when setting and maintaining boundaries.
Standing up for yourself and communicating your needs without feeling bad about it.
Overcoming fears of abandonment and establishing healthy coping strategies.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Ep 12: Stop Gossiping

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