100% Guilt-Free Self-Care

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**100% Guilt-Free Self-Care**

100% Guilt-Free Self-Care because you know you need it to live your best life and feeling guilty isn’t helping you do it. You may believe self-care is selfish. It isn’t. You may believe you are broken. You aren’t. From exercise to mindset to books that will change your life, Tami is here to remind you that you matter and self-care is the foundation to your dream life.

Latest Episodes:

EP 195: Never Ending To-Do List Sep 21, 2023

Show notes

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-195

No one wants one more giant time-sensitive thing on their to-do list. Speaking of to-do lists…what's on yours?

At home,3 no doubt you are dealing with at least some of this:

Dealing with the mail Paying bills Grocery shopping Home goods shopping Home maintenance Dishes Laundry Pets Garbage Cleaning Cooking weekday and weekend meals Calendar keeper Childcare outside the home Watching kids inside the home Transportation for kids Bathing and grooming kids Bedtime routine kids Morning routine kids Diapering and potty training Medical for kids Homework, projects + school supplies Discipline and screen time for the kids Middle of the night comfort for the kids

There are so many more home management tasks, and maybe you are your co-parent/partner already split them up equitably. Woohoo! 🎉🎉🎉

If you are like me, this list totally stresses you out, and you would like to know how other people manage all this adulting. Seriously, who can get this all done?!

In this week's podcast, the Fair Play Fall Series continues. I am digging into the 100 Fair Play cards, being a game changer, and figuring out the roles we play in our household organization.

Show links:

Fair Play Interest List

EP 194: Time Is the Greatest Fight You Will Ever Have Sep 14, 2023

Show notes

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-194

In this week's podcast, the Fair Play Fall Series continues. I am diving into the toxic time messages we've internalized and how Fair Play can help.

I hope you'll give it a listen. You can find all the episodes and show notes at www.tamihackbarth.com/podcast

Show links:

Fair Play Interest List

EP 193: Data, Definitions and a Big Call In Sep 07, 2023

Show notes

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-193

In this week's podcast, the Fair Play Fall Series continues. I am diving into the data around unpaid labor and the beliefs we need to unlearn in order to create more equity in our homes. It isn't a fight between genders because we all suffer under the current system.

I hope you'll give it a listen. You can find all the episodes and show notes at www.tamihackbarth.com/podcast.

Show links:

Fair Play Interest List

EP 192: Wouldn't It Be Nice to Have Time for Yourself Sep 01, 2023

Show notes

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-192

In this week's podcast, I am happy to introduce you to the why behind the Fair Play Method. It isn't just splitting up domestic labor more equitably so we create a more balanced workload. It is also about creating Unicorn Space for all the adults in the household.

I hope you'll give it a listen. You deserve Unicorn Space of your own, and Fair Play gives you the tools to get it.

Show links:

Fair Play Interest List

EP 191: It's Not Just You. It's Time for Fair Play. Aug 24, 2023

Show notes

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-191

We are back from our annual beach redwoods vacation and seven days from starting school. For me, this week is like the one between Christmas and New Year's. The exciting stuff has happened, I am not sure what day of the week it is, and there is a whole lot of New Year energy swirling around.

This week used to be the worst week of the year for me. My teacher spouse returned to work, and I was left without any childcare. I was expected to pick up all the slack in our household and help get the school year off to a calm start.

Needless to say, it never worked that way because I was so resentful about all these unsaid expectations about how I was in charge of everything house-related because he was working outside the home.

It wasn't until a few years later that I realized that lots of couples experience a similar thing. It becomes even more clear when kids come into the picture. There is a default household manager who takes care of all the daily grind tasks: dishes, cooking, meal planning, homework, cleaning, laundry, child care….. the list is endless.

Even when you had conversations about equity and the equal distribution of household labor, somehow, it still ended up with one person doing much more to keep the household going.

The good news is that it isn't a personal problem. It actually is a systemic one. Our systems aren't set up to help us succeed.

In this week's podcast, I am happy to introduce you to the Fair Play Method.

I hope you'll give it a listen. Fair Play gives words to what we've been feeling and a plan for getting us to where we want to be.

Show links:

Fair Play Interest List

EP 190: Make That Appointment. Your Future Self Will Thank You. Aug 17, 2023

Show notes

Hello from Humboldt County, California! I am at the beach this week enjoying some cool coastal fresh air, reading under an umbrella, and walking in the redwoods.

Our annual summer vacation is so relaxing and restorative. We stay at the same place, so we know what to expect, and it makes packing and unpacking so easy. We follow the same daily rhythm of breakfast at home, adventure in the morning, lunch out, quiet time in the afternoon, and dinner at home.

We mix in old favorites for adventures and sprinkle in new locations for some excitement. Childhood friends have moved up here, and other friends have college students here, so we are also spending time with friends while we are here.

This is my favorite week of the year!

Instead of recording a show while on vacation, I am sharing my latest episode with the Okayest Moms podcast all about the importance of moms getting their vital health screening appointments done on time.

I hope you'll give it a listen.

You can find the episode and show notes at https://www.okayestmoms.com/episode-164/

EP 189: How to Be An Adult (from the archives) Aug 10, 2023

Show notes

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-189

Is it just me, or do you also sometimes look for the how to be a grown up manual? Growing up in the 70s and 80s I had to figure out a lot of stuff on my own — without Google or YouTube or even a ride to the library often enough to keep up with my questions. Quite frankly I don't know if I was qualified for the job 🤣🤣.

I have even asked various therapists over the years if I am on the right track for being a good grown up. Thankfully, someone I admire very much wrote a book about it.

In this week's podcast I am resharing my interview with author Julie Lycott Haims. I first "met" Julie when I watched her TED Talk about raising successful kids without over parenting and read her first book How to Raise an Adult. I was lucky enough to sit down with Julie to talk about her latest book Your Turn: How to Be an Adult.

Show links:

EP 188: Summer Cooldown (from the archives) Aug 03, 2023

Show notes

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-188

How is it where you live? Unsurprising to anyone, it is hot, hot, hot in Sacramento. I am trying my best to roll with it, but this time of year, I am looking longingly at my boots and sweaters. I am very much looking forward to soup season.

In this week's podcast, I am resharing an episode about the best ways to cool it down in the heat. I hope you will give it a listen and share with me your tips for keeping yourself sane in the hot weather.

EP 187: How To Make the Finances Work for What You Really Want (from the archives) Jul 27, 2023

Show notes

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-187

If I had a dollar for every time someone said, "It must be nice to be able to afford fill-in-the-blank service, product or vacation," I would be a very rich woman. The reason I can afford so many things is (of course, generational wealth and the privilege of being college educated and white), but also, I put my money into my personal values.

I value education, so I say no to spending hundreds at Target on cute home decor I don't really need. Instead, I spend those funds on courses and coaching services that will improve my health, my parenting, my partnership, my organizational skills, my speaking career, my thought leadership, my writing, and my business.

I have paid out of pocket for courses and coaching in all those areas because I want to get better at all those things. It is an investment in money, time, and energy to learn all this stuff, but I gain from the teacher's experience and expertise, and that ultimately saves me time and energy.

I also value travel experiences, so I say no to lots of meals out, happy hour while spending those funds on plane tickets, lodging and experiences outside my region.

You get the picture, I allocate my dollars towards the things that make my heart happy.

When I am tempted to say I don't have the time or money for things and exprences I want, I take a deeper look into where I am spending my time and money. It is from those time and money audits I can see where I can shift my spending toward what I actually want more of in my life.

In this week's podcast, I am resharing an episode about saving and spending on what matters most. I hope you will give it a listen and share with me what spending with your personal values in mind would mean to you.

You can find all the episodes and show notes at www.tamihackbarth.com/podcast.

EP 186: Books Good Enough to Read Again (from the archives) Jul 20, 2023

Show notes

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-186

In this week's podcast, I am resharing my list of books that have made such an impact on me that I return to them over and over again. Fair Play gave me the language to work with my partner on making sure we were both taking responsibility for our house and child.

We'd set out to have an equitable relationship, and even we fell into some gendered defaults. I love this book so much that I have added Fair Play Facilitator to my professional offerings.

I hope you will give it a listen and share with me what books have made such an impression on you that you return to them over and over again.

Show links:

Fair Play Interest List

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