You're Welcome w/ Zoe Nightingale - TopPodcast.com

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You’re Welcome w/ Zoe Nightingale — Society & Culture
You’re Welcome w/ Zoe Nightingale

You’re Welcome is a satirical improv comedy show whose goal is to find and share peoples stories, from all over the world.

Each episode is unique and can range from 5 minutes to an hour, and will feature a brand new topic usually with someone Zoe has just met. This podcast is not for the faint of heart, buckle up.

ABOUT YOU’RE WELCOME

Like most brilliant ideas, this show was started over a molotov concoction of alcohol and various illicit substances. Zoe had given up on her life long dream, of being the female Howard Stern years ago but finally set out armed with a folding table, a couple lawn chairs, and a foam board sign that read “Free Sex Advice.” One by one strangers stopped what they were doing and sat down to talk to them about their lives.

We’d like to take this moment to thank you for coming to our site and leave you with the eternal words of Oscar Wilde:

“I was under the impression that inordinate joviality can atone for an entire lack of class”

This show is done for one reason only, to bring laughter and remind you that we are all the same.

Copyright: © All rights reserved

Latest Episodes:

What is a Furry? Feb 14, 2018

Show notes

So concludes my time at Mid West Fur Confurence 2017. I want to say a huge thank you to KP and Corey who are featured in this podcast, they are the main organizers (volunteer) and have been in the business of fandom for over 20 years. The main thing I learned from here is that when you have community, you are happy. When you have childish laughter in your heart, you are happy. When you don't take yourself too seriously, life is better. I send you so much love through the invisible airwaves this valentines day, wherever you are remember that all you need to do is love yourself and everyone else will follow suit. People come and they go, but if you really know that who you are is full of love and is constantly striving to learn more and to be a better version of yourself then fuck cupid. HAPPY VALENTINES DAY BABIES! Love Zoe Your eternal valentine Edited by Emily Brodtman www.emilybrodtman.com music: sat morning cartoons by Emily Brodtman Exit - Sing Out - Cat Stevens find all my articles https://cools.com/single-on-valentines-day-fun/?ref=homepage Contribute to my Patreon campaign! https://www.patreon.com/zoenightingale Leave me a review on iTunes or Stitcher! https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/zoe-nightingale/id886045028?mt=2 xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Inside the Dealers Den - MidWest Fur Fest 2017 Ep 3 Jan 31, 2018

Show notes

Episode 3 is here! Today we go inside the mysterious world of the Dealers Den, where anything and everything to do with fandom can be purchased. From laminated personalized name tags, to full on fur suits to tails and ears and noses and ears and shoes and anything your little heart could desire. Something you should know: SPH - specially placed hole, this is what people in the fandom call the holes they have built into their suits so they can get jiggy with one another. Enjoy everyone! Stay warm Edited by Emily Brodtman Check out all my writing at the www.cools.com https://cools.com/sex-trends-2018/ Don't forget to leave me a review on iTunes! Don't forget you can contribute to the costs of making this show at my Patreon campaign! Find the hoof shoes at @choascostumes Find ugly puppy: @ugly_puppy Find Lemon Brat: www.lemonbrat.com @lemonbrat Find PocketWolf @pocketwolfsuits

Orion The Sergal - Mid West Fur Con 2017 #2 Jan 11, 2018

Show notes

Next up we meet Orion, a wonderful 20 year old EMT who was at the midwest Fur Con with his Maker. He is a Sergal, a blended dragon character who is dopey, loving and a little like Pepe le peu. Enjoy! Music: Fantasy Mariah Carey Wanna Be - Michael Jackson Edited by: Emily Brodtman

Do You Register At Petco? Fur Con 2017 Ep. 1 Dec 22, 2017

Show notes

Welcome to the wonderful world of furry fandom, a magical world where everyone looks like some version of your favorite cartoon character and you can be literally anything, or anyone you want to be. Now, I know some of you may not understand this world, and neither really do I, but it doesn't matter because its just another way for people in this world to connect, find love, find friends, and express their creativity. It's not about sex, it's not lunatics who think that they actually are a dragon, it's people who have found a "fursona" that allows them to access parts of their personality that they otherwise wouldn't have been able to. I have ALOT of interviews, and I'm excited to roll these out for you week by week, as always I'll be posting around Thursday/Friday every week, and I hope you are as excited as I am to open the door to this hidden world. Music: The Puppy Song Atomic Dog - George Clinton Born to be Wild - Stephen Wolf Edited by Emily Brodtman - www.emilybrodtman.com I have a new job at the cools! Go check out all of my writing here! https://cools.com/wont-find-nyc-sex-parties/

King Kong Slugs Dec 03, 2017

Show notes

I met Caleb when he was panhandling outside 711, and I was walking my friends brand new black lab puppy (SO FUCKING CUTE) and I caught a bit of his giant blue saucer eyes beneath his hoodie and I just wanted to adopt him. Young, funny, quick, sly he's just great. I spent awhile with him, bought him a pack of cigs and gave him my card if he was ever in trouble...randomly two days later I was walking down the street and who do I see but young Caleb sitting on 6th ave trying to collect enough coin to buy a small bag of weed. What happened next is going to be an on going series where I try to get this beautiful human back on some semblance of a life track or at least find him a warm place to get high in. Winter time in NYC is brutal, and no matter how much money you have, you can be giving more, that can be clothes, time, money, food, or just eye contact and respect. There is no reason that with the insane amount of wealth floating around this great city that anyone should have to sleep on the street. Also I have a new gig! I am the editor of the new sex and modern love section of www.thecools.com come check out my comedic musings about my own struggles with love and my recommendations on best places to eat/drink/dance/get high in the CITY. https://cools.com/what-scares-me-most-about-growing-up/ Music: Ben Harper: Homeless Child Keep Ya Head Up: Tupac Edited by Emily Brodtman www.emilybrodtman.com I A WRITER!!

Aint NOTHIN Fake About a Tittie In YO Mouth - NJ Exxxotica Porn Convention Nov 17, 2017

Show notes

Back to basics, back to where I belong. In a broke down NJ poorly lit convention center surrounded by Porn Stars and the people who love them, and the last frontier for DVD sales. I don't know why I love places like this so much. It's full of such wonderfully weird people, and no one gives a FUCK. There is a freedom, and a overt grime that allows everyone there to relax. The moment you step inside those doors everyone is on the same playing field. Everyone's like yeah, I'm a pervert, I admit it, and so are you so let's have a great time. The thing that always gets me is the insane amount of money that is being tossed around this industry. People are making serious money, and in super creative ways. Ok, so maybe someone is going to be able to see the inside of your small intestine...but every job has it's ups and downs. I met a ton of fascinating people, and I'm going to be doing longer interviews with a Instagram influencers (1.2 million followers!!) named "lethal lips" who is famous for being one of the only people in the world that can deep throat a 18 inch dildo. Girls gonna give us some tips. We're also going to get in deep with Jordan, the unbelievably beautiful Dominican con man who was covered head to toe in tats that said things like "FUCK THE FEDS" and "I see you looking KEEP HATIN" he was fucking fascinating...I'm going to put a list of all the social media handles of all the people we spoke to that day so you can see for yourself just how fabulous they are. Stay warm kids and don't forget WINTER HAS COME. Get busy get snuggley, keep skinny, don't become a drunk sugar addict like I do every year. Music: I want your sex part 1 - George Michael Doin' it - LL Cool J (best SONG EVER)

In Dust I TRUST Nov 10, 2017

Show notes

It's day 7 and I have gone to the Burning Man Lost and Found in search of my phone which I lost day 1 (duh)and I have gone to find it. This was my very first time there and I must tell you it was one of the most pleasant and organized experiences I have ever had in my actual life anywhere. I had the very best time asking people WHAT they had lost and WHERE ..somebody lost a JET PACK. I am not joking. It was just hilarious. So I was waiting in line for literally forever and was still coming down off a massive night of mushrooms and pirate ships and dance floor battles and didn't notice when a dog the bounty hunter lookin dude covered in tats with a bleach blonde hair had a tiny tea cup long haired black and brown Chihauhua sticking out of his murse. Now, this would normally not bring about such an intense reaction from me, but I have NEVER seen anything living from nature there except for one misfortunate insident with a rouge bird and one single bumble bee all which caused great confusion and wonderment for ever from me. How did they get there? Did this bumble bee fly across the entire desert? Is he so thirsty? Anyway, I digress but the burning man lost and found is the worlds saddest and most joyous place. There was a pile of keys the size of Everest for a million RV's, bikes, chastity belts, Segways shaped like dragons...you have never seen people happier than when they find their RV keys. When you lose your keys at burning man you feel like your entire life comes to a halt and you'll waste out there alone eventually turning into stoney chunks like Ozymandias a warning to future festival goers to keep their shit togeher. Either way, thank you burning man for another INCREDIBLE YEAR. In dust I trust. Music: On and On: Halcyon Orbital: Halcyon Edited by: Emily Brodtman emilybrodtman.com

Genetic Jackpot Nov 03, 2017

Show notes

It's the last day of Burning Man and I am wandering through the skeletal remains of the Robot Heart graveyard. The sun has just come up, and the sky is an orgy of orange. As I stare and wonder about the wasted potential of this generation and watch drug fueled men chase beautiful costume queen Instagram addicts, I feel two very large hands on my bear chest. I look to find the source of the foreign intruder and it belongs the glowing Cherub like face of Miles Matthewson. A man so full of the kind of innocent silly positive energy that you instantly sort of fall in love with his lackadaisical carefree white privilege. I met him wearing a panda onesie wandering the furthest outreaches of deep playa and in order to not become another extinct bear I have zipped it down all the way to my cervix (exposing my bear chest) So there I was winding my own business for ONCE and was stopped by this Adonis like man and his super cool east London girlfriend (she wasn't even dressed up she was in like cool brunch clothes and of course she's a yoga teacher in Ibiza FULL time which means she's off her literal tits) by putting both their hands on my boobies and pulling me into a long drawn out stand up cuddle puddle. This is the kind of thing that only really beautiful people can do. This guy looked like Beyonce's stylist walked around following him with a golden light spotlight and a fan for his silken shoulder lengh locks. Just because they were cute didn't mean I wasn't going to verbally punish them a bit for their audacity so we spent the morning on bike rides and art cars and celebrating life and once again it reaffirmed for me how much I love that god damn place. It's just pure magic baby. Song: Life is a bowl of cherries Road to Nowhere: Talking Heads Edited by Emily Brodtman www.emilybrodtman.com Don't forget to sign up to my Patreon Campaign. I decided to keep my podcast ad free because, lets face it, ads are gross, so any help you can give me to support the costs of editing and equipment would be so helpful. This is not my full time job, but one day I wish it could be and unless I start sucking the right dick it's not gonna happen. HELP! www.patreon.com/zoenightingale

A Burning Man Oct 26, 2017

Show notes

It's day 8 of the Burn. I have lost everything and everyone on purpose for I decided last minute to let my grumpy, drained, bedraggled, rag tag team of core friends drive off without me, so I could watch for the Temple burn for first time in 7 years. So I sent them home(with their faces that looked like a cats asshole) with all my Lisa frank colored belongings (beside a minions covered toothbrush, a small bottle of coconut oil and my microphones)and ventured out alone into the desert to see what else the universe could throw at my sleepy face. I ended up meeting two amazing men who were Temple Guardians. Which means they are men who guard the temple to make sure that it's safe for everyone especially during it's burn. I got a chance to talk to them about a really bizarre surreal thing that had happened the day before, which was someone ran head first into the fire as the Man burned on Saturday night. Burning man is dangerous, it's physically brutal and an emotional roller coaster. Most years someone either gets really hurt or killed. This year was different as many people saw this man sprint to his death and then watched his charred remains be pulled out of the wreckage. So it was nice to have an inside explanation as to what happens within the DPW when tragedy strikes. Never regret thy fall, O Icarus of the fearless flight For the greatest tragedy of them all Is never to feel the burning light." - Oscar Wilde

Put Your Pussy Where Your Mouth Is Oct 18, 2017

Show notes

Three years ago I brought my entire family to Burning Man. Everyone thought I was crazy. Why would you bring your family to the one place where you're supposed to be free of all your "default" worlds staples...So what happens when you take 5 east coast super jews whose idea of camping includes 4,000 Egyptian sateen blend sheets and a penchant for obsessing over food, logistics, weather and being on time and leave them helpless to fend for themselves in a desert populated with 70,000 insane asylum escapees with only ME as their way finder? MAGIC BABY. I have been plotting for this moment basically my whole life. I have always been different, always been the fly in my families ointment. While they love me, they've never really understood what the deviled egg I was ever wearing, saying, doing. My resistance to getting a "real job" my failure to get a masters. My insistence on spending my life traveling like dandelion spore in the wind. While they have always supported me, they have always questioned me, rolled their eyes and muttered old yiddish expressions under their breath whenever I would tell them about my newest adventure business idea or travel plans. We have always been incredibly close, but as the years went by and people moved away, had children, settled down we naturally grew apart. I stayed crazy, they all stayed sane. It's like the quote in dazed and confused, I get older, they all stay the same age. I needed to ruffle their feathers. To take away their cell phones, their addiction to work and process. I needed them to get lost, be confused, fend for themselves against the elements, let fate take them on a Icarus ride straight to the sun. I needed them to understand the joy I have felt my whole life being free so they in turn could understand me. So a pinnacle moment for my mother was this moment when she went to the Pussy Day Spa. For her it revolutionized her entire mentality around being naked. Which was in fact I think the thing that was stopping her from finding a new life partner. I have so much gratitude to Woody and Champagne for giving my mother this gift. They are such a wonderful example of different ways you can find partnership that don't erect prison walls around your natural biological urges. THANK YOU PUSSY DAY SPA!! Edited by: Emily Brodtman www.emilybrodtman.com Music: Car Wash: Rose Royce So Fresh So Clean: Outkast

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