The Place We Find Ourselves

Latest Episodes:

144 Embodied Sexuality and Religious/Sexual Trauma with Jenny McGrath Oct 16, 2023

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I am joined today by therapist Jenny McGrath who is passionate about helping people heal from the damage of purity culture. One byproduct of purity culture is a disconnection from your body and a distrust of your body. If you feel shame about your body, or especially shame about your sexuality, this episode will hopefully help you. For those who want to dive deeper into these things, please consider signing up for Jenny's Embodied Sexuality course. You can use coupon code "PLACEWEFIND" to save $60 off the cost of the course.

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143 Finding Home Again After Religious Trauma with Matthias Roberts Oct 09, 2023

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Matthias Roberts joins me today to talk about his book Holy Runaways: Rediscovering Faith After Being Burned By Religion. Topics covered include: why belonging is so crucial for each of us, how to trust when you've been betrayed by others so many times before, and why it's hard to open ourselves to actually receive care when it is available.

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142 Healing From Trauma: The Power of "Being With" Part 2 Sep 18, 2023

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We pick up with Curt sharing about Cora's experience in a story group. Specifically, we talk about about why Cora's intense bouts of panic were her body's way of saying "something is wrong and needs care and attention." We also talk about a woman named Cheyney who experiences deep healing as a result of taking in the acceptance and embrace of other group members in the precise moment when she is feeling intense shame. This is how neural networks get rewired. This is how healing happens. We need other people.

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141 Healing From Trauma: The Power of "Being With" Part 1 Sep 04, 2023

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Curt Thompson returns to the podcast to talk about how we heal from trauma. In short, trauma and emotional pain begin to heal when our stories are witnessed by an empathetic other. Curt shares a story from his newest book about a woman named Cora, who is disconnected from her emotions and finds it very hard to receive care from Curt. Curt's newest book about suffering and healing is called The Deepest Place.

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140 Trauma, Resilience, and Race with Jimmy McGee and Rebecca Wheeler Walston Jul 21, 2023

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Jimmy McGee and Rebecca Wheeler Walston join me to talk about how they came to understand the importance of trauma and story engagement. If you want to engage your story in more depth, the Impact Movement is hosting an online event called Hope and Anchor Story Weekend. This zoom event will take place Sept 30 to Oct 1. You can find out more here.

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139 Role Reversal: When A Child Becomes A Parent May 15, 2023

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I am joined today by my friend Rebekah, who shares a story from when she was six years old. Topics covered include: feeling like there is something wrong with you but not knowing what it is, self-doubt about how you see reality, difficulty trusting your gut, learning to listen to your body and to trust the information that it is giving you.

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138 How To Heal From Sorrow and Grief Part 5 with Mary Ellen Owen May 01, 2023

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Fellow therapist Mary Ellen Owen joins me today to share her journey with sorrow. Like many people with trauma, it took Mary Ellen years to find her tears, years to befriend her sorrow. Although she cognitively knew that grief was necessary for healing, something within her said "hell no" to feeling the unfelt sorrow. In this final episode in a series on grief and sorrow, Mary Ellen shares how she came to befriend her sorrow. In the words of Fredrick Buechner, "Whenever you find tears in your eyes, especially unexpected tears, it is well to pay the closest attention. They are not only telling you something about the secret of who you are but, more often than not, God is speaking to you through them of the mystery of where you have come from and is summoning you to where, if your soul is to be saved, you should go to next."

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137 How to Heal From Sorrow and Grief Part 4 with Heather Stringer Apr 17, 2023

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I am joined today by Heather Stringer, who has lots of experience creating rituals that heal. Heather begins by describing two rituals: one focused on recovering from sexual assault and the second focused on preparing for a double mastectomy surgery. Heather and I talk about why ritual is so unfamiliar to many of us, and the healing that occurs when we begin to move our bodies in particular ways, especially when others are present to bear witness to the ritual.

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136 Engaging Another Person's Story: Why It's Important and How To Do It Apr 03, 2023

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I am joined by Cathy Loerzel to talk about how to engage another person's story. Effective story engagement is not a magical skill that some people have and some people don't. It can be learned. Today we give a preview of some of the principles and tactics of effective story engagement. If you want to learn more, consider joining us on Saturday, May 13, for a zoom conference on How to Engage Another Person's Story. You can sign up here.

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135 How Your Story Affects Your Sexuality Mar 23, 2023

Show notes

Jay Stringer joins me to talk about the relationship between our current sexual difficulties and our story in our family of origin. Sexual struggles are rooted in our stories—and, very often, our stories of attachment to our primary caretakers. As Jay puts it, "When it comes to sexual struggles, there are always two story lines at play: there is the story line of your present sexual struggles, and then there is the story line of your growing up experiences which set you up for those present sexual struggles." If you want to explore your sexual story in more depth, please sign up for the Sexual Attachment Conference on May 5-6. You can sign up here.

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