The Gutsy Podcast | Mindset, Personal Development & Entrepreneurship for Women

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44: Squeezing the Juice out of Life with Lauren Chiarello Nov 19, 2019

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When you’re faced with life challenges, it can be difficult and sometimes annoying to embrace happiness. What’s that saying, when life gives you lemons… find a friend whose life has given them vodka and have a party.

True personal growth lies in finding things and people to be grateful for — even when stuff isn’t going as planned. Lauren Chiarello, NYC-based business owner (Chi Chi Life), fitness guru, and 2x cancer survivor, is sharing how she’s learned to integrate gratitude into her daily schedule and the profound impact it’s made on her ability to keep moving forward.

Every day, we get to choose how we react and see things. And if you’ve got a naysayer (or three), just know that if you’re giving the best you can give and it still doesn’t resonate with them, then it’s ok to move on. “At the end of the day, you’re the one that makes the magic happen… believe in yourself!”

Ready to fuel your mind + body? Awesome. Tune into this week’s episode to get your weekly fill of mental pick-me-ups.
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Powerback 43: Have the Difficult Conversation Nov 14, 2019

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We often put off having challenging conversations because, well, they're uncomfortable. I can't really think of a single person I've come in contact with that's like, "Oh great, something is going wrong. I can't wait to tell this person."
It's often perceived as easier to just not talk to them or deal with it. Maybe it's me? Maybe if I just don't bring it up it'll just magically go away. But, inevitably, it ends up running in the back of our minds; building up stress, anxiety, and adding fuel to a potentially smoldering fire.
So now something goes wrong, you get upset, but let it slide. Then something else happens and then something else happens. And this could be over the course of a couple of days or a couple of years, but when that initial issue has not been resolved (or at least communicated about), your tolerance for that person starts to decrease. And when something else pops up, you're quick to judge and react.
You're gonna freaking snap and all of those circumstances and occasions where you did not address the issue before, it's going to come out through rage, anger, and resentment. What started off as an annoyance a few months ago is now a full-blown argument; which causes a whole lot more trauma in your relationship.
This week, I want you to take your power back by just having those difficult conversations. I often say that people don't know what they don't know. It might be irritating the shit out of you that something is put into the cabinet the wrong way, but if your spouse or partner doesn't know it's quote-unquote the wrong way — it's going to bother you way more than it is them because they don't even know it's an issue.
We underestimate our own feelings when we pull them down and bottle them up (a lot of times to protect the other person or to honestly just not have to deal with it). In the long run though, what we end up doing is creating way bigger situations about really small things that could have been addressed.
Emotions and communication are at the root of all humanity. If you're upset, talk about it. If there's a problem, face it. If you're happy, celebrate it. If you're frustrated or angry, give yourself a few minutes to cool down. The last thing that you want to do is react impulsively. But once you've been able to gather yourself, get your composure, write down the facts, and really process things — sit down and have a conversation. Now. Not two weeks from now; not a month from now; not a year from now. NOW. You owe it to yourself and the other person.
It says that you protect your own energy and that you value the relationship enough to sit down and talk. People just don't talk enough anymore. I'm here to encourage you today to open up that conversation, and have that talk. Not only is it going to give you an opportunity to clear the air, but it's also going to give you an opportunity to maintain that relationship.
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43: The Hallway Between Where You Were and Where You're Going Nov 12, 2019

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In my opinion, this is one of the least talked about business topics.
You’ve invested a lot of time, money, and effort into evolving yourself. You’re no longer willing to sacrifice who you are or how big your dreams are. So you cut ties, remove toxic relationships, fire clients, clean out your desk, get organized, change your brand, have a different mindset… the whole nine yards.
What once felt like a closed-door ahead you can now see a light through. And not just through the keyhole — the whole damn door is open. All you have to do is walk through it.
But there’s this space in between; what I call, The Hallway. You’ve walked through one door leaving old shit behind you, but you’re not yet through the new door of life. It’s frustrating, challenging, and makes you wonder what the heck you’re doing (or if it’s even worth it). You’re over the past but frustrated because you’re not filling in your future.
This week, we’re getting in the nitty-gritty of this subject. It’s a place that I’ve found myself at more times than I care to admit, but it’s a necessary part of growth, expansion, and personal fulfillment. If you find yourself stuck between two worlds, tune in — it’s real, raw + ridiculous.
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Powerback 42: You Don't Need Approval Nov 07, 2019

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We often get caught between asking for opinions and seeking approval. There's something about having a really amazing idea or being excited about something and then going to someone else and having an acknowledgment from them. Right? It's kind of a mental high we get when someone says, yeah, what you just thought about is incredible. So when we're looking for opinions, a lot of times what we're really looking for is validation.
Now, that's not to be confused with a situation where you legitimately need someone else's advice; you're stuck, you're not sure what to do, you feel like you're backed into a corner and you really are just relying on someone else to help potentially open up your eyes to a situation and guide you through it. But validation — yeah — that's a real thing and I'm just as guilty as the next person because it feels good when someone else validates something important to you. And you know, sometimes that's okay.
It's okay to want someone else to feel as excited as you are or see the vision you have. But I want to encourage you to pause and ask yourself: Am I looking for validation because I need approval or permission to follow through with whatever idea it is I have?
It's all about being intentional in the questions you're asking because what happens when you are seeking approval from someone else who isn't in the same position you are? Meaning, they're not taking the same risk. They're not in the same walk of life. They're in a different industry. They're a different level of risk-taker than you are. Maybe one person is more conservative, maybe another person is more free-flowing and a free-spirit. I mean, there are just so many variables. It's hard to have people who are not in the same scenario or situation help you make decisions (especially when they may not have or understand all of the details).
This week I want you to take your power back by evaluating who it is you're going to, the types of questions you're asking them, and then breaking it down to yourself and say, am I looking for encouragement or am I looking for approval?
Sometimes when we have these big bold, audacious goals, we just want someone to say, yeah, yeah, you can do it. When really what we need to do is find the validation within ourselves. It's getting all the facts and making that educated decision yourself and then feeling 100% confident in the decision you made. You can't please everyone and not everyone is going to be a raving fan of the things you do, but it's not everyone's job to understand your life and it's not your job to allow other people to stop you from living yours.
You so got this, you don't need anyone's approval to tell you that you can. All you have to do is start by believing in yourself down to the depths of your core. Then put action behind it to back it up and make it happen.
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42: Embracing Tramua for the Higher Good with MaryLynn Hinde Nov 05, 2019

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Along our journey, we’re given things that don’t belong to us: words, opinions, traumatic situations, heartache, pain. Even though we know we didn’t ask for these things, we feel the need to carry them, day in and day out, in a metaphorical book bag — and that damn thing gets heavy.

Today, we’re going to talk about letting some of the skeletons out of the closet and embracing trauma for the higher good. MaryLynn Hinde is a magical human being, to say the least, but her journey to this conversation was not an easy one. She peels back the layers and talks about her trauma and how it presented itself in her life, career, and relationships — all to inspire you to know you’re not alone and it’s ok to LOVE yourself.

The key here — there is someone that cares. Your feelings are real and there is more support around you than you may realize. It requires taking a risk and opening up, but when you do, love and support can follow. And most importantly… your healing can begin.

This week’s episode is heavy but beautiful, and a necessary conversation to have.

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Powerback 41: Taking Back Your Time Oct 31, 2019

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Let me guess: You went into work today with a full list of things that need your attention and the best intentions in the world to get everything done today. Yet, inevitably, a new issue pops up that needs your attention. One after the other. And by the time you leave you're thinking, What in the hell? I did so much today. Yet I feel like I haven't accomplished a damn thing.
We lose so many hours in the day without even knowing it. It's like a slow leak in a balloon or a slow water leak in your pipes. It's not overly noticeable at first, but over time it can cause some serious damage. That's why this week I want you to take your power back by intentionally choosing productivity and efficiency over multitasking.
1. Limit phone time.
Oh gosh, we love our phones. Right? And I know that we talk about this a lot, so I'm not trying to beat a dead horse, but what's real is real. You can set up screen-time alerts and they will tell you every week how much time on average you are spending on your phone. I get my alerts every Sunday, and this past Sunday my phone let me know that I had spent just shy of four hours a day every single day on my phone. Now granted, part of what I do for a living has to do with my phone for social media, content, and strategy. But even using my phone for a living, it's really kind of a hard pill to swallow knowing that I've spent four hours face down in my phone every single day.
2. Silence/turn off notifications.
The next thing is to turn off your notifications. I did this probably a couple of years ago and it's one of the most freeing things I've ever experienced. So, I don't get notifications for my email. I don't get notifications for my social media. There are no push notifications saying, Hey, check me. Hey, check me. Other than text messages, all of your different apps suck your attention away from you every single day without you even realizing it.
I also recommend doing the same thing when you're actually physically working on your computer. So when there is something you have to get done — you need to focus and just really dig into — I highly recommend closing the tabs or even closing your browsers. Completely closing the Facebook tab, closing out your email apps, closing all those things. If you have instant message notifications — whatever it is that takes your attention away — close it. It takes your brain up to 20 minutes to get back to where you began, which means it's taking you two, three, four, five times longer than what it actually should take you to get something completed.
3. Batch work.
And one of the best ways to be productive at work is to batch work. Let's say you need to work on sending follow-ups. Make a list of all the people you need to follow up with, get your brain and body in that frame of mind, and send all those follow-ups at one time. If it's time to do bills, collect all of them, pull all of your numbers, get all your resources ready, and work on nothing but numbers. If your social media has been slacking and you really need to build some content, closeout everything, tuck yourself away, and solely focus on your goals and mission for social.
We make it 10,000 times harder to do anything when we are multitasking on so many things at the same time. Not only are you going to be more productive, but you're going to get some time back and at the end of the day, you can actually go home feeling like you've accomplished something.
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41: Personal Styling for Success with Kristin Holt Oct 29, 2019

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The way you dress and present yourself is often associated with your business brand. Whether it’s super casual or ball gown attire, there’s a way for you to stay authentic to who you are. How you dress and can have a direct impact on your confidence, how you carry yourself and even how you perform.
Let’s face it – when you’re having a great hair day and your jeans aren’t cutting off circulation, your productivity level goes through the roof.

As our resident fashionista, Kristin Holt from Worx & Co joins me to share some powerful tips on how to spruce up your current wardrobe without having to spend a ton and how she can make over 100 outfits from just 10-15 staple pieces. And her words of encouragement are to push yourself to try something new. You never know if you **truly** like something unless you try it!

Whether you love style or feel like it’s a foreign subject, this week’s episode has lots of goodness to help you level up your wardrobe game.

(Continue to Episode Blog)
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Powerback 40: Prevent the Past from Repeating Itself Oct 24, 2019

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If you've lived through a previous trauma — regardless of what size, matter, or subject — you know just how difficult it can be to put yourself in the situation again where the same outcome could be possible. Now, while I can't make any guarantees, what I can tell you is that the past has a really hard time repeating itself if you don't repeat the past.
This week, I want you to take your #powerback by doing something that has been making you nervous because maybe you've had previous experience with this. Maybe this is an unknown territory that left you feeling not so awesome and really just rocked your world in one way or another. But here's where the true power back lies: You can repeat a previous type of scenario but get a completely different outcome by changing the way you respond and react.
If you find yourself emotionally reacting to the same types of situations, this is an opportunity for you to change the way you respond by not reacting. It could be something as simple as less exposure to this situation, person, or topic. But your power back lies in that you get to choose how you respond. If you feel like you're constantly behind at work, you can't keep up, you're always one step behind of where you actually need to be — then that's a chance for you to change the way you schedule yourself.
Are you taking on too much? Are you taking too much off of other people's plates for them, but ultimately kind of screwing yourself over? Are you saying yes entirely too many times? You see, you can prevent being overworked and over-exhausted by changing the way you accept work and the way you schedule things. Sometimes that's as simple as being realistic. When can you actually have things back to people by? We create this hallucinated urgency that everyone wants everything at some lightning speed and that they'll return it to us just as quickly. But 9 times out of 10, their expectation on when they're going to get it back is drastically different than yours.
If there's constant confusion with the way things need to get done in your office, then maybe this is an opportunity to change the way they're documented. Have you put processes and systems in place? Does everyone know how to do things the same way? You can prevent future confusion and increase employee morale simply by being consistent with your processes.
If you find yourself in the same financial circle, the same challenges right back to where you started, then this is a chance for you to change the way you not only view but spend and save your money. And if you find yourself with the same type of toxic relationships, then you have the power to change the way you allow people to enter and manipulate your life.
You see, cycles typically continue on and on because we continue the same behaviors and patterns, but the true power back is being presented with a similar situation and saying, you know what — we're going to do things differently this time because I am tired of feeling like this. I am tired of feeling like I'm never getting ahead. I'm tired of honestly just being tired. This cycle no longer belongs to you and that power comes down to you changing the way that you respond.
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40: High Achievement Addiction with Shauna VanBogart Oct 22, 2019

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It’s so easy to get in the flow of “doing.” You’re busy day in and day out, working around the clock to achieve a goal. You’re willing to put everything on the line to get to the finish line. Yet, by the time you get there, you’re exhausted.
Sure, you get the satisfaction of “winning,” but within a few weeks, days, or heck, even a few hours, you’re back to feeling unfulfilled, unsatisfied, and craving your next achievement. Why? To prove your worth.

This week, the fascinating and energetically intelligent Shauna VanBogart and I talk about everything around being a high achiever and how easy it is to get stuck in the trap of choosing to win over creating impact. We want to DO when what we really need is to open ourselves up to the act of receiving.

And just to give you a taste of the nuggets of awesomeness in this episode, Shauna recommends these 4 levels of surrendering which allow you to step into who you need to be vs. what you need to do:

Surrender being right
Surrender being in control
Surrender the unknown
Surrender independence

Get your pens ready, folks. This one is packed full of takeaways!

Stay Gutsy,
LauraAura
(Continue to Episode Blog)
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Powerback 39: Bring Awareness to Your Fears Oct 17, 2019

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Every Monday morning in the worxandco office, we open up our week together as a team and share what we call a Monday Morning Motivation. We know the hustle and bustle of the week is ahead of us. We know there are client projects to go over. We know there are timelines and calendars to discuss. But first, we need to get our minds in the right place.
This is so important because it's not only an opportunity to really come together and have a unified message, but it's also an opportunity for us to see things through a different lens and get our brains moving.
A few weeks ago, our communications specialist, Kelli, led us through a session based on a book she is currently reading called 15 Things You Should Give Up to Be Happy by Luminita D. Saviuc. You can find tons of blogs for cliff notes version to really just get straight to the goods, but Kelli went into a chapter that really struck all of us: Give Up Fear.
We talk a lot about fear here on The Gutsy Podcast because it's one of the most powerful emotions. When it's not constructed or directed — it can wreak havoc. So this week, I'd like to talk about bringing awareness to our fears and then what to do from there.
So when fear pops up, the first thing you want to do is either sit and think or grab a piece of paper and pen and think: What do I most want? In a no-limitation scenario where fear isn't a concern, worry doesn't exist, and the future is your canvas. What do you want?
The next question is: Why you are afraid? What is it about this particular scenario that brings fear to the forefront? This is a really great opportunity for you to dig a couple layers deeper than what you may even be thinking right now. This is a chance for you to get real with yourself; the deep-rooted fear of why you can't have that, why you can't achieve that. What's holding you back from it?
And then the third question is: What is the actual truth? When you step outside of your fear, what is actually going on? What is it you already know that debunks that fear right from the start?
So think about the fears arising for you. Write them down. Then ask yourself: What am I afraid of? What am I fearing will happen if I do this? If I pursue that? What's going to happen because of those things? And then really get real with yourself and say, what is actually true? What do I know to be true to this scenario?
I hope you'll find peace in this exercise because we found tremendous power in it. And slowly, but surely, we're lifting a lot of those fears one by one and pursuing the very things we have held ourselves back from doing.
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