Show notes
00:00.00 mikebledsoe Well I think we should record now then you got 2 Eight week puppies a week old puppies. Yeah, you don't seem much like ah. 00:01.45 Max Shank Yeah,, let's do it. Puppies are great. Yeah, ah. I don't seem like a dog owner at all. And in fact, so far I have not been. 00:13.52 mikebledsoe No. 00:19.17 mikebledsoe What did she do to you. 00:22.92 Max Shank Made me an offer I couldn't refuse I guess I mean it's it's funny. Um, we talk about basically on this show. We talk about benevolent selfishness not in so many words, but basically do as good for yourself as you can. Well doing good for other folks and I've never wanted to have the responsibility required but I love dogs. Someone brings a dog into the gym and I'll just play with it the whole time I'll completely ignore the people right? but. I don't know there's a really nice, beautiful connection between beings between a person and a dog and Lindsay my special lady friend. She ah she just fell in love with this dog right. And I watch the two of them together I'm like man I don't want to because Lindsay and I cohabitate so I don't want to stand in the way of that so I was like ah I guess you can have a dog and it can live at the house but outside basically and then. Within 1 trip. Um, it was put on the table like we should take her her brother also so a pair of dogs and that seemed really nice and i. Kind of started to question all the resistance I've had toward that because resistance is a funny thing. It's either the exact right thing and in fact, you should experience a lot of resistance toward stupid risky behavior ah like jumping off cliffs. With no safety equipment. It's not really a reward there. The resistance to do that is is a good thing. It's a safety mechanism but basically ah I thought it would be good to to shake things up a little bit might as well go to instead of one also is. My thanking. 02:32.35 mikebledsoe Yeah I think it's kind of like it's probably easier have 1 or 2 kids instead of 1 02:41.43 Max Shank It's like ah, an energy balancing thing I feel like um, it's ah, a boy and a girl puppy and of of course I'm a boy and my lady is a girl I shouldn't say of course I mean who knows I could be whatever I want to be but it's like ah it feels like a good. 02:55.73 mikebledsoe It's right can make it up anytime you want. 02:59.18 Max Shank Yin Yin and Yang balancing so husky pomeranian mutts they're adorable. They're the cutest dogs ever seen. Yeah, one of them is and 1 of them is not. 03:00.66 mikebledsoe Yeah I love that what kind dogs are these. 03:08.70 mikebledsoe Wow They probably are furry. 03:17.77 Max Shank It's they would don't even look like they're from the same litter. 03:18.69 mikebledsoe Ah, interesting. Yeah, we're looking to getting a dog I think we're gonna end up getting a pit. We want to get like a big tough dog and like a little tiny. Yeah and then I have like a little tiny Yipper you know. 03:22.26 Max Shank 1 1 03:28.67 Max Shank Ah, defense dog. 03:35.27 Max Shank like like fuck what's his partner's name like Lenny in of mice and men and then the little shorter smart guy kind of you know I'm talking about ah man it's like ah there are these 2 guy. 03:37.24 mikebledsoe So. 03:46.78 mikebledsoe Now. 03:54.39 Max Shank Someone and Lenny in of mice and men anyone who's read that book and remembers it is laughing right now because Lenny is this ah mentally challenged guy and then there's the who's huge and then there's the much smaller guy who basically. Calls all the shots and Lenny's like I like to pet rabbits and you know that kind of that kind of thing so you got the big. You got the big dog bringing the muscle and then you got the the smart dog. 04:13.33 mikebledsoe Right? Yeah, yeah, so. Exactly exactly we'll make it work. Yeah um I had an interesting weekend. The ah my my fiance and I did a little couple's Journey. So. 04:25.00 Max Shank Yeah. 04:38.14 Max Shank Oh. 04:40.88 mikebledsoe We took some special medicine. That's really good at opening the heart and creating more connection. So we had an all day experience together. Ah a variation variation which is. 04:46.47 Max Shank Is that mdma. 04:55.35 Max Shank Mdma is like hooking up your heart to an electrical socket. So. 05:01.45 mikebledsoe Ah, yeah I took ah a variation of that slightly different. Ah it's it's better for 1 on 1 connections or connection to self if you were to take it in a big group. You would kind of find yourself being a little more hermit versus mdma. 05:11.60 Max Shank Oh. 05:19.90 mikebledsoe Where you're going to want to you know, be friends and make love to everybody? Yeah, so um, it's yeah, but. 05:20.70 Max Shank Love everyone? Yeah right? What a horrible drug. What a horrific side effect you, you're gonna want to love everybody ban. It. 05:35.30 mikebledsoe Ah, it's really difficult not to love everybody? Um, but it's it's a really good experience for um, you know, even though Ashley and I have had an enormous amount of personal development work and and. Ah, communication work and all these things and and we're probably we're we're definitely in the the point zero one percent of couples on communication and yet even though we're there with sobriety. We use a substance a heart opening substance. And you know we just start digging into areas that we weren't willing to or you know I think I think that these these medicines are so um, things that are really working on the serotonin. You don't really There's there's a level of presence that you're able to stabilize for a period of time there where it allows you to get deep with somebody so beyond just the being really happy and loving There's also a heightened a much heightened level of of presence and so I got to learn a lot. Yeah, a lot of openness. So like. 06:33.91 Max Shank Oh. 06:42.95 Max Shank Sounds like openness to yeah. 06:49.50 mikebledsoe Like I'm open to hearing a prefer experience and she's open to sharing I'm open as open to listening. It's ah it's it goes both ways if 1 of us was using it the other unpleasant we wouldn't get nearly as far. Yeah. 06:51.50 Max Shank Right. 06:59.15 Max Shank Huh unless one of you was super enlightened and able to be very open on command I think that's that's why people say that comedians are modern day philosophers. Because that's ironically like None of the only people we listen to because you use humor and it drops a person's guard so it like opens them up in the here and now so they actually take it in rather than lecturing to someone where I don't know if you tried it, people don't love that they they close up. 07:21.81 mikebledsoe Yeah, so. 07:29.80 mikebledsoe Yeah now. 07:34.57 Max Shank Real quick and so that's kind of like a bit of a psychedelic experience for someone to ah catch you off guard with the surprise of humor so much that it rocks your balance off center and so you're like whoa and you just fully like take that. That bit of information in and you know this openness and boundaries thing makes me think about ah the openness to to welcome new lives into my home. It. Ah it feels already like a psychedelic. 07:53.64 mikebledsoe Um, yeah. 08:06.10 mikebledsoe And. 08:12.64 Max Shank I mean puppies are drugs Man are you kidding me now I'm like gonna love this thing Yo I'm like fucking rocking and rolling right now. It's insane. The fact that I've even accepted this I mean last week I would have never even considered it every time she asked I was like now I'm like I'm a. 08:12.94 mikebledsoe Oh yeah, you're gonna be high for at least six months you got it? yeah. 08:32.27 Max Shank I'm a cat I'm a cool cat I'm a fat cat I'm a fucking cat I don't want any other things around I don't want to love anything else. That's why I told her I was like I don't want to love anything else, but it can happen really fast and that openness right? So what you're saying. 08:41.16 mikebledsoe A Ah yeah. 08:51.30 Max Shank With the medicine which is ah an exogenous substance. Basically that's taking you to that level of openness that is required for let's just call it complete communication where there's no like. Coversion right? oh. 09:10.10 mikebledsoe About as complete as you're going to be able to get I mean if there's another more complete way I would love to be you know, be with that. But um, what we so fast. Well here's the thing is like I'm willing to share a lot of things. 09:20.62 Max Shank So fast too. 09:28.97 mikebledsoe Because I have some of the things I haven't shared up to this point because I'm afraid of how she'll receive. She'll receive it and when I'm having that experience and feeling this way I'm like well if she were to share if I were gonna were to share something that's triggering now's the time to do it because this't gonna be she. 09:33.90 Max Shank Ah. 09:42.40 Max Shank Wait till after you get married man. Forget it. 09:46.60 mikebledsoe Is when she's gonna be the most open. 09:51.39 mikebledsoe Ah, yeah, yeah, but yeah, so we had a nice time. It created a lot of closeness. Um and gave us like a really clear vision of where we're currently standing and where we want to go together and. 09:52.88 Max Shank Ah, just put it off till later. It'll be. It'll be fine. 10:00.45 Max Shank Yeah. 10:08.66 Max Shank Whom. 10:10.70 mikebledsoe Yeah, it was really really beautiful and I mentioned all this because it brought up because I know you and I like to have create distinction and we like to look at the juxtaposition of 2 things and the contrast of things and her and I both really care about. 10:29.40 Max Shank E f. 10:29.94 mikebledsoe People right? and we really care about helping people and being of service to people I know you are too and None of the the differentiating factors between how it expresses between her and me which I think expresses similarly amongst a lot of men and women. Is. She tends to really focus in on the individual like how do I how do I help this individual heal or how do I help this individual. You know, live out their best life and all that and whereas I'm much more concerned about humanity as a whole. 10:56.12 Max Shank Um. 11:02.77 Max Shank Move. 11:08.39 Max Shank Totally. 11:08.76 mikebledsoe How does how are how a society can benefit from how this person is behaving and so what's that what? well yeah, it's. 11:15.53 Max Shank I can relate I can relate. It's a bit grandiose isn't it I can absolutely relate the that desire ah for for like it's so exactly me too. It's a big difference of scope. 11:26.81 mikebledsoe Well well, that's where I'm making decisions from it's it's you know like I want to help this person but I'm not going to sacrifice the people around them in order for them to get what they need like they I want them to show up in a way that's good for everybody. Not just for themselves. 11:35.94 Max Shank Oh. 11:43.53 Max Shank Oh interesting I I took it to mean like she enjoys helping people 1 on one and you have this vision of being broadly beneficial to you know None or None or something like that. Oh. 11:58.39 mikebledsoe No, no yeah I think that's I think that's also true. Um, but yeah, my my desire to help there I used to have the desire to help millions of people and and I know I've touched maybe close to that I don't know. 12:03.20 Max Shank Misunderstood. 12:16.21 mikebledsoe Ah, with with some type of message. 12:18.77 Max Shank Depends if you count ricochets which I do and then and then like you've probably affected like a billion people right? I count ricochets. Ah. 12:23.10 mikebledsoe Totally totally Rick let's count Ricoche's here I'm going to keep that one. Yeah, ah. 12:31.23 Max Shank Ah, me too that was good that was like a little easter egg for us today. 12:37.11 mikebledsoe Yeah, so um, ah so I think that men and this isn't you know there are no absolutes here. But I think men in general probably think about humanity as a whole and and women think about the individual and that's probably why women are. Going to be much more compassionate to a single person having that's down on their luck versus a man who's more like you know we need to clean up the streets. You know we look at the we have ah a homeless population in Austin Texas which is um, improving. It's getting smaller because. 13:12.25 Max Shank Wow. 13:15.21 mikebledsoe The citizens of Austin got together and voted a little over a year ago to create a camping in the city ban. Um, because years ago the the city decided to make it where people could camp in the city which created. 13:29.17 Max Shank Yeah. 13:32.37 mikebledsoe Ah, tent you know several tent cities around town that were just insane and and there's still an issue but you know like we're in the car regularly and these people are on something that's causing them to scream at people that don't exist on the street while holding a sign to try to get. 13:33.78 Max Shank Um. 13:51.88 mikebledsoe You to hand them money and um, it's you know and she's like well you know can we help this one person and I'm looking around going. How do we clean this shit up because like you know how much how much do you give this person. 14:00.40 Max Shank Who. 14:11.52 mikebledsoe Over time. How much help do you give them before you say look We just gotta push you to the outskirts. We don't know what to do with you like you are your responsibility and you're causing problems for other people so where is that line where we're sacrificing the whole we're sacrificing you know. 14:18.54 Max Shank Yeah. 14:28.59 mikebledsoe Many individuals because 1 individual can't get their shit together and it's um so it's it's very interesting to me. Yeah, it's just an interesting place to be is because I I what I'm seeing is if I care about humanity then I have to. Ah. 14:31.95 Max Shank Totally. 14:47.89 mikebledsoe The the best place for human the thing that creates the best place for humanity as a whole is when if each each individual is taking on personal responsibility and so. 14:55.80 Max Shank You see that as just the best option was that the word used. Yeah. 15:02.36 mikebledsoe It's probably optimal like if if humanity as a whole is going to flourish that would only happen under the circumstance of every individual taking personal responsibility. But what we have is a lot of people caring about. 15:12.41 Max Shank Yeah. 15:18.71 mikebledsoe You know the feelings of 1 person and trying to get everybody around them to mold to what they desire sacrificing 20 people to make one person happy. It's very interesting. 15:26.49 Max Shank Ah, right? Well, it's all about it's all about so our our ah species is the the compassionate caring species now. We're still savage animals like a lizard dinosaur. Ah, baboon right? But we have this super high level of compassion which is the only reason ah and desire for connection emotionally and intellectually which is why people painted on cave walls. And left their handprints. There. There's no reason to do that unless you want another person to see it this desire to like leave your Mark and be part of the tribe and sustain and so that's also very easily leveraged to make absolute bad choices. But ah comparative good c…
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