The Alli Worthington Show

Latest Episodes:

How to Raise Emotionally Strong Boys with David Thomas Aug 22, 2022

Show notes

Hey, hey! Welcome back to the show! Today’s episode will be so helpful to anyone who has a boy in their life that they care about deeply.

David Thomas joins me today to talk about raising emotionally strong boys. He’s spent 25 years counseling boys and young men. After all, we live in a world that often bombards our boys with messages like “don’t feel” or “don’t ask for help.” Both are harmful messages and, unfortunately, ones that many of them absorb throughout their lifetimes.

Listen in as David and I discuss how we can best communicate with the boys (and even the men) in our lives, along with practical ways to help them develop new vocabulary and skills that will better serve them over time.

As the mom of five boys, you know I listened closely to David’s advice in this episode, my friends. Such wisdom!

David is the director of Family Counseling at Daystar Counseling Ministries in Nashville, Tennessee. He has co-authored ten books, including his two latest titles, Raising Emotionally Strong Boys and Strong and Smart: A Boy’s Guide to Building Healthy Emotions.

Listen in to learn more about:

What causes boys to instinctively begin to channel all primary emotions (fear, sadness, confusion, disappointment) into anger around ages 9-10
Some red flags may indicate the boys in our lives are struggling emotionally and how we can help them recognize, regulate, and repair those emotions
How Jesus is the perfect example of healthy masculinity

Favorite quotes:

~Boys tend to have a less expansive emotional vocabulary which makes us think they have fewer emotions.

~Somewhere around 9 to 10 boys instinctively begin to channel all emotions fear, sadness, confusion and disappointment into one emotion and that is anger.

~Having side by side conversations rather than eye to eye. Even shame registers differently for us as males and too much eye to eye ,where females can experience intimacy and connection, we males experience shame and threat in that.

~Anger is a secondary emotion; there is always something going on beneath.

~This evidence that Jesus felt all the things we are going to feel and had an emotional presence and strength in the midst of it. He also was a man who walked in intimate close relationships with a handful of men.

Links to great things we discussed:

"Feels Like Home" | Drew & Ellie Holcomb ... - YouTube Music

Kipchoge: The Last Milestone (2021) - IMDb

Everything sad is untrue- Book

Vuori Clothing: Activewear & Athletic Clothing for Ultimate …

David Thompson’s website- Raising Boys & Girls

Mad Men (TV Series 2007–2015) - IMDb

All Hail King Jesus (Lyric Video) - Bethany Wohrle - YouTube

Worship for fierce faith - Playlist

Confident Motherhood Community

Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :)

xo,

Alli

How to Release Control with Sharon Hodde Miller Aug 15, 2022

Show notes

Hey friend! Today, I welcome back to the show one of my dear friends, pastor, author, and speaker, Sharon Hodde Miller. This much-needed conversation about our craving for control and what happens when we don’t deal with it gave me so many things to think about, and I think it will do the same for you!

Be sure to listen in to hear as Sharon shares how the advice she heard about handing control over to God (while entirely true, biblical, good, and important even) wasn’t exactly helpful as she struggled to navigate life in the middle of the pandemic… as a wife, mom, and church planter.

Sharon realized that it wasn't just that she didn't have control but that it would cost her dearly when she tried to have it. So much wisdom is found in what she discovered…. I promise you don’t want to miss out on this eye-opening conversation!

Sharon pastors Bright City Church in Durham, NC, with her husband, Ike. She is also the author of three books, travels around the country speaking at churches and conferences each year, and holds a Ph.D. on women and calling.

Listen in to learn more about:

How control is an illusion that will break more than it fixes in our lives and relationships.
Identifying the red flags that could indicate controlling behavior and ways to address them.
How our generation brings our control issues to the internet instead of God.

Favorite quotes:

~Whenever we feel anxiety, we reach for control to soothe that anxiety. But control is not able to do that. What it actually does is exacerbate our anxiety even more.

~God does not give us control but he gives us agency. Agency is power with limits.

~Make room so that you can actually pay attention to what’s going on inside of you. Don’t turn on podcasts, audio books or music when you are in the car, just sit in silence when you drive and then name accurately what’s going on inside of you . Very often it’s not something outside of you, it's something spiritual going on inside of you.

~We were created for security and stability and so whenever we feel that fear, that overwhelm; that is our soul recognizing there is a dissonance with the world around us.

In this episode I answered this question:

How do you know as a coach that you don't want to work with someone? (40:55)

Links to great things we discussed:

Sharon Hodde Miller (@sharonhmiller) • Instagram photos and videos

The Cost of Control Book - Amazon

This Is Thomas Newman | Spotify Playlist

Top Gun: Maverick (2022) - IMDb

Only Murders in the Building (TV Series 2021– ) - IMDb

Mark Sayers Book- A Non-Anxious Presence

Nuuly: Clothing Rental + Resale Marketplace

See A Victory | Live | Elevation Worship - YouTube

Dashing Diva USA: Shop Glaze, Magic Press, Gloss & Glue-On Nails.

Join the Confident Motherhood Community here.

Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :)

xo,

Alli

How God Makes Us Better Humans with Scott Sauls Aug 08, 2022

Show notes

Hey hey! Today on the show, I welcome back pastor and author Scott Sauls for a candid conversation about how we can find freedom from regret, hurt, and fear that’s part of the human experience.

Listen in as he speaks candidly about his struggles with anxiety, depression, and fear over the years and how those struggles are all important parts of telling the story of what God is up to in his life. Scott also reminds us we live in a broken world, but God’s not finished with us yet, and He is in the process of redeeming and renewing everything. Such a comforting reminder for all of us, right?! So good.

We take a deeper dive into how carrying these burdens weigh us down. At the same time, we can find hope in how God is drawn toward us, not appalled by us, in our sin and sorrow.

Trust me when I say this is another conversation you don’t want to miss!

Scott Sauls is senior pastor of Christ Presbyterian Church in Nashville. Before this, he served with Tim Keller at New York City's Redeemer Presbyterian Church as a lead and preaching pastor. He is the author of six books, including Beautiful People Don't Just Happen: How God Redeems Regret, Hurt, and Fear in Making Better Humans. In addition to his books, Scott also blogs regularly at scottsauls.com.

Listen in to learn more about:

Why we tend to absorb the things in life we regret like a sponge, but things like grace tend to quickly leak out.
The way challenging experiences build character and a natural path for knowing God better.
How we can walk through the hard things with a more positive take on what God can do with those parts of our lives we’d rather avoid.

Favorite quotes:

~We easily get appalled, by ourselves. It traces back to the Garden of Eden, we were made for perfection and so there’s this alien experience we have to our original nature and original design. Whenever we fall short of the mark there is something within us that is triggered toward guilt and shame.

~There is no punitive motivation that God has towards his children. His motive towards sinners and sinners is surgical not punitive. God's heart toward his kids is not punitive but redemptive, it’s a healing motive.

~Our emotions are just as much a God given part of us that’s meant to complete our humanity and expression.

~Owning what’s wrong in us is the first step to becoming the best version of ourselves.

~It’s like we have become disintegrated people because we have become performative.

~The lives that we are living now are just prologues because life in the fallen world is all prologue to the fullness of Life that still awaits those who are anchored into the finished work of Jesus Christ.

In this episode I answered this question:

Can you give me your best tip on how to get myself organized? (40:08)

Links to great things we discussed:

Beautiful People Don't Just Happen: How God Redeems Regret ...

Child Again - song and lyrics by NEEDTOBREATHE | Spotify

Ozark (TV Series 2017–2022) - IMDb

Free Design Tool: Presentations, Video, Social Media - Canva

TurboTax Tax Filing

Marcel the Shell with Shoes On (2021) - IMDb

Coach School

Join the Confident Motherhood Community here.

Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :)

xo,

Alli

How to Build Things That Matter with Annie F. Downs Aug 01, 2022

Show notes

Hey friends! It’s the last week of our Smart Girl Summer series… I sure hope you have enjoyed it as much as I have! I am thrilled to have Annie F. Downs on the show today. I’m absolutely convinced that the world needs more fun and laughter, and Annie brings both wherever she goes!

In this conversation, we talk about business, marketing, podcasting, friendships, failures, and even how to chase the fun in life! You definitely don’t want to miss how we bonded over the importance of having a solid mission statement to keep us focused. Plus, Annie candidly shares how her understanding that God has called her to build something that will bring light keeps her motivated and pushing forward in all seasons.

Annie F. Downs is a New York Times bestselling author, sought-after speaker, and successful podcast host based in Nashville, Tennessee. Founder of the That Sounds Fun Network—which includes her aptly named flagship show, That Sounds Fun—and author of multiple bestselling books, Annie shoots straight and doesn’t shy away from the tough topics. But she always finds her way back to the truth that God is good and that life is a gift.

Listen in to learn more about:

How “knowing your lane” in your business or ministry is the absolute BEST way to manage imposter syndrome and comparison.
Debunking the myth that just because someone has a bit of success, everything magically turned golden for them. 100% not true, by the way!
How Annie views failures. Here’s a hint, she believes everything is an experiment and an opportunity to ask, “So, what’s next?!”

Favorite quotes:

~It’s a little easier to cheer for everyone who’s in their lane when we are sure of our lane. I need to see my mission statement everyday so I know MY lane and don’t compare myself to other people and I don’t live and die by the applause of the internet.

~The reality is that nothing is a total flop or a failure. Everything is an experiment that you pivot as you build, so sometimes, you stop building the building if you don’t want to put energy into it anymore; or if the return on the investment is not matching the investment.

~If you don’t know why you are doing what you are doing when you get put in a fire, you will jump out.

~What keeps me doing this is that I really think God put me on the planet to do the thing I’m doing right now.

~What keeps me motivated is that I believe God’s really called us to bring light to the dark places.

~My biggest piece of advice is to start paying people to help you before you have the money to pay them; if it means giving away a little piece of equity or paying them hourly.

~We pray for wisdom and the mind of Christ everyday, that’s how you are going to make decisions you do not know how to make.

Links to great things we discussed:

Annie F. Downs – author. speaker. podcaster. loud laugher.

Concealer Makeup | IL MAKIAGE

Buc-ee's Famous Beaver Nuggets Sweet Corn Puff Snacks Texas …

Buc-ees: Home

That Sounds Fun Book - Annie F. Downs

The Old Man (TV Series 2022– ) - IMDb

Lauryn Hill - Doo- (That Thing) (Official Video) - YouTube

Join the Confident Motherhood Community here.

Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :)

xo,

Alli

How to Follow Your Calling with Lisa Bevere Jul 25, 2022

Show notes

Welcome back to our Smart Girl Summer Series, which features real conversations with real friends and colleagues about the behind-the-scenes of our careers and lives.

You definitely don’t want to miss today’s chat with my friend, Lisa Bevere. I’ve had so many valuable conversations with Lisa in my life, and I’m so glad to share one with you! This conversation is encouraging and affirming. I personally love Lisa’s perspective on giving up the fight for a seat at the table, and instead, focusing on doing what God has asked us to do. Oh, friends… I agree with her wholeheartedly about this!

Lisa Bevere is a wife to John, mom to four men, godmother, internationally known speaker, and New York Times best-selling author. She has spent nearly three decades empowering women of all ages to find their identity and purpose.

Listen in to learn more about:

How Lisa never dreamed she would be doing the work she is doing now
The importance of making exchanges in the lies we believe and how comparison can make us misunderstand God’s love for us
These 3 truths: Smart girls know what to hold on to and what to let go of. Smart girls know who to give weight to in their life. Smart girls don't allow random strangers to assign value to you… and so much more!

Favorite quotes:

~There’s certain things that when God drops into our hearts we need to actually guard them. There’s people that you should share them with and people you should not share them with .

~We have to think about social media as people being guests in your realm . They do not have the right to hijack it or take you emotionally hostage.

~If we have a revelation that God loves me uniquely then there is no place for comparison. Because comparison says,” I want to be like them or I want to have what they have or want to do what they do” but if I understand that God loves me uniquely then I am going to take the time to find out what God has entrusted me with.

~You have to be faithful in the season. The right thing in the wrong season becomes the wrong thing.

~When you are first starting a journey the things that you see on the road are different from an aerial view.

~Smart girls make sacred spaces in their lives.

~When we sense the Holy Spirit speaking to us , we have to add weight to it by adding action.

Links to great things we discussed:

Lisa Bevere: Home

Lisa Bevere (@lisabevere) • Instagram photos and videos

Premium BB Beauty Balm SPF 40 - Dr. Jart

The Original Refrigerated Protein Bar - Perfect Snacks

Fat Fuel Keto Coffee

Thor: Love and Thunder (2022) - IMDb

November Rain- Gunsnroses

Join the Confident Motherhood Community here.

Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :)

xo,

Alli

How To Fight Self-Sabotage with Jen Fulwiler Jul 18, 2022

Show notes

Hey hey! Today’s episode is a must-listen, friend! So much so, I’m bringing this Smart Girl Summer conversation back from the archives. Jen Fulwiler shares all sorts of knowledge about what it looked like in her life to step out in faith from one career to another. Y’all, it’s so inspiring!

Jen is a standup comic, bestselling author, former Sirius XM Radio host, and mom of six. And as if that isn’t impressive enough, she self-produced her first standup comedy tour, booking theaters across the country with nothing more than a Google search and her personal credit card. And she sold out almost every show!

We talk about her famous Tik Tok videos, how she pivoted through a pandemic as a stand-up comic, and the lessons she’s learned when dealing with self-sabotage and resistance moments. We also dive into how she faces a setback, gets out of her own way, and some of her “bomb” moments.

Listen in to hear all about:

View courage like it is a sport. Some have a natural talent for it and others have to practice.
The importance of getting help where you need it if you want to accomplish your goals and dreams (and how to embrace the grace necessary to accept that help!).
The differences between Tik Tok and Instagram and the importance of knowing the demographics for each platform (if you’re interested in growing your reach on social!).

Favorite quotes:

~Courage is like playing a sport, in the sense that some people might be just born with more natural skill in that area than others but anyone can learn to be good at it if they practice.

~You learn about the game of life by taking little risks and letting them turn into bigger risks. You start to feel more comfortable with the bigger risks because you just have more experience with risk.

~Going for it is the most humble thing you can do and in fact when people stop themselves, usually it is actually your ego driving that it is your ego saying, “That would be embarrassing to me.”

~When I face a setback, I speak in terms of action, not emotion, and that has really helped me move forward and stay strong, even when I know I’m feeling frustrated or embarrassed or whatever it is.

~I think it takes humility to say, “I can’t do it all, I can’t, I need some help in this department.”

Links to great things we discussed:

Jen Fulwiler - Website and Social media

Phone stand - Amazon.com

Skin Care, Fragrances - philosophy

Billions (TV Series 2016– ) - IMDb

Only Murders in the Building (TV Series 2021– ) - IMDb

Mr. Jones - song by Counting Crows - Spotify – Web Player

BarkBox - The Monthly Dog Toy and Treat Box

Join the Confident Motherhood Community here.

Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :)

xo,

Alli

How to Be Kind & Curious About Life with Erin Moon Jul 11, 2022

Show notes

Welcome back to Smart Girl Summer, friend! I’m thrilled to welcome Erin Moon on the show today. You may know her as The Bible Binge’s Resident Bible Scholar or from her mission to educate the internet on Zac Efron, but no matter how you found her, you can’t deny that she’s fun!

Our conversation covers everything from following a dream job that didn’t work out to how our relationships (yes, even the ones we have online!) can create incredible opportunities for us to recognize our calling and then dive in to learn all we can about it. Friends, we covered All. The. Things. And we had a blast while doing it!

I hope you find yourself laughing along with us as you listen.

Erin Hicks Moon is the author of the weekly newsletter, The Swipe Up, the Resident Bible Scholar on The Bible Binge podcast, host of the Faith Adjacent podcast, and senior creative at The Popcast Media Group.

Listen in to learn more about:

How authentic networking helps you build real relationships with people (and how natural opportunities follow!)
How Erin’s offline and online community and helping people feel seen and heard serve as professional motivators for her
How to show you care about your audience on a personal level and the value that action provides

Favorite quotes:

~We got so comfortable putting ourselves down that we never bothered to notice all the things that God has gifted us with.

~When anything I do resonates with anyone, makes someone feel less alone, makes them feel heard and understood I feel motivated.

~We are in a time right now where it’s very easy to learn. If you want to start a YouTube channel or reels or TikTok or be a writer - There are so many resources out there available to help you do that. I would recommend figuring out what it is you want to do and then diving in and trying.

Links to great things we discussed:

The Bible Binge: Home

Instagram Links — EHM - Erin Moon

Turning Red (2022) - IMDb

Ms. Marvel (TV Mini Series 2022– ) - IMDb

trtl Pillow - Scientifically Proven Super Soft Neck Support Travel …

Some Call Me Crunchy - Cosmetics

Lectio 365 on the App Store

Lovesac - Modern Furniture | Modular Sectionals & Bean Bag Chairs

Elvis (2022) - IMDb

Only Wanna Be with You - YouTube

Reeds Classic Hard Candy Rolls - Root Beer Pack of 24

Confident Motherhood Community

Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :)

xo,

Alli

How to Follow Your Calling in Community with Lisa Whittle Jul 04, 2022

Show notes

Hey, friends! I am absolutely thrilled to have my good friend Lisa Whittle back on the show today as part of our Smart Girl Summer series! We go behind the scenes in Lisa’s story and share never-before-told stories of our friendship over the years along with our co-founding Called Creatives. I can’t wait for you to hear this one!

Listen in as Lisa talks candidly about a season she experienced with wanting to step away from what she knew deep in her marrow God had called her to do. It is often a challenge to push through the hard places in pursuing our God-given missions, and Lisa brings so much truth-telling to this topic for us.

We also debunk the self-sabotaging mindset that if we don’t have success in the beginning or in the first few years, even then, “it’s just not meant to be.” We both agree what this means is that maybe it’s merely the time to acknowledge you’re in some pretty good company because we’ve all been there at some point or other in our callings and creative endeavors.

Lisa Whittle is the author of eight books, a sought-after Bible teacher, founder of Ministry Strong and the popular Jesus over Everything podcast. Lisa is also the co-founder of Called Creatives and has been featured in numerous media outlets.

Listen in to learn more about:

How Lisa wanted to quit writing after book 3 or 4 and seriously contemplated going back to school to become an interior decorator, an attorney, or a chef!
The ways we can over-spiritualize the hard places in our lives and self-sabotage ourselves.
The importance of keeping company with other people who have things in common and who make us better.

Favorite quotes:

~One of the biggest lies is that we are the only one that is facing rejection or lack of traction or whatever the case may be. And so, because we are very self focused and we only know our own experience I think the most powerful thing is when women find community with other women.

~Just because you have hit an impasse, just because you have come to a place where you are feeling uncomfortable or you are getting a rejection or things did not go smoothly that does not mean you need to quit, that is a sign that you are in a very normal situation of trying to move forward in a calling or a creative entrepreneurship role.

~There’s something about keeping company with other people who not only do we have things in common with, but also make us better.

~ If you are a woman who is concerned about doing business with another woman do your due diligence but I wouldn’t let your trust issues get in the way.

Links to great things we discussed:

Called Creatives

About Lisa - Lisa Whittle

Breaking Bad (TV Series 2008–2013) - IMDb

Magnetic Eyelashes - Amazon

Lightyear (2022) - IMDb

Remember Two Things - Album by Dave Matthews Band - Spotify

Vaseline - Amazon

Join the Confident Motherhood Community here.

Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :)

xo,

Alli

How to Dream Again with Bianca Olthoff Jun 27, 2022

Show notes

Hey hey! Welcome to week three of our Smart Girl Summer Series as I continue to speak with my most brilliant friends sharing behind-the-scenes stories that you won’t hear anywhere else.

Be sure to listen in today as I chat with author, speaker, podcaster, Christian leader, and my long-time friend, Bianca Olthoff. We talk about how the early death of a dream she had for her future actually led to her discovering what God called her to do.

Don’t miss how she references the word reboot many times throughout this interview… such wisdom is found in each mention! I promise!

Bianca Juarez Olthoff is the best-selling author of Play With Fire and How To Have Your Life Not Suck and host of the We’re Going There podcast. She is a passionate Jesus-loving, Bible-teaching, book-writing MexiRican who loves to help people navigate life, connect in community, and live significantly.

Listen in to learn more about:

How Bianca believes God has graced her for various seasons of life (including this VERY BUSY current one) and how He does the same for each one of us as well.
Creating space in our lives to look back on our hardest seasons to see how far God has brought us (and take the time to celebrate the spiritual success and growth found there!)
The practical ways Bianca accomplishes so much in her everyday life, including what she learned after tracking 14 days of her life.

Favorite quotes:

~ If the Lord is asking you to lay this down it’s because it’s not Yours to carry and when you pick this up it will be with even greater strength.

~ When you’re building a business, when you're building your purpose , when you’re walking in you’re calling -it’s like triage, I need to invest in the things that are actually going to live.

~Anointing does not mean awesome, it means you are set apart.

~ Identify your voice. What is your teaching style?

~ Right now we have access to every amazing biblical communicator there is across the world. What happens is that we are prone to emulate the voice , the sound of other people we admire. That’s great to be inspired by, It’s dangerous to be influenced by.

Links to great things we discussed:

Bianca Olthoff -website

Jack Harlow - First Clas series s [Official Music Video] - YouTube

Top Gun: Maverick (2022) - IMDb

Keeping Up With the Kardashians Streaming Online - Hulu

Hollywood Flawless Filter de Charlotte Tilbury | Sephora

Stracciatella (ice cream) - Wikipedia

Lightyear (2022) - IMDb

Tuesday Night Music Club - Album by Sheryl Crow | Spotify

Amazon.com : IT Cosmetics Bye Bye Pores Pressed Finishing Powder

Confident Motherhood Community

Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :)

xo,

Alli

Smart Girl Summer with Kasey Van Norman Jun 20, 2022

Show notes

We’re continuing our Smart Girl Summer Series this week with Kasey Van Norman! Remember, Smart Girl Summer is a series featuring some of my most brilliant friends sharing behind-the-scenes stories that you won’t hear anywhere else.

Kasey is a bestselling author, counselor, cancer survivor, and Bible teacher. But I invited her on the show to talk about hard things. Kasey has a passion for trauma therapy, and I wanted her to share her perspective on trauma, faith, what God means to her, and how nothing is wasted in our lives
This episode is not meant for young kids, as we cover some difficult topics, but my sincere hope is that our conversation will touch your heart.

More on Kasey: She has 20 years of experience as a mental health therapist and has traveled the country encouraging others with God’s Word for 10 years. She loves connecting with women through retreats and events and is a plenary speaker for the Extraordinary Women Conferences and the American Association of Christian Counselors.

Listen in to learn more about:

The winding path that led Kasey to her role as a trauma therapist and what we all need to know about trauma
What God needs from us before He sends us into sit with someone and hold their story
Generational trauma, and the important steps we can take to process and prevent it.

Favorite quotes:

Trauma really is an experience that you had in your life that at that moment, was so far outside of your emotional wheelhouse, of what you knew to be true that it so radically shifted the internal landscape of your brain, your mapping, the way your pathways moved and it wrote itself in and created this threat response.

A 5 year old speaks to safety, 15 year old determines “Who can I trust” and 25 year old says, based on those 2 messages and core beliefs “This is who I am going to let myself be intimate with.”

You can be in the Church serving, in leadership, a full blown believer going to heaven when you die and still be in complete bondage.

That’s the work of trauma- it is accessing those old pieces of us that are still very present and allowing them to speak.

The Bible is not waiting on me to change , the Bible is not waiting on something to be true, it is a book that is true no matter who I am.

Links to great things we discussed:

Kasey Van Norman - Website

Love on the Spectrum - Netflix show

Top Gun: Maverick (2022)

Green Goddess Glow Oil - Milani Cosmetics

Jurassic World: Dominion (2022)

Dune Movie

Obi-Wan Kenobi (TV Mini Series 2022)

Lenny Kravitz- Mama said album