Square Roots - THE Classic RPG Podcast

Latest Episodes:

Xenogears Part 1 - The Climate War of 2023 Apr 18, 2022

Show notes

Square Roots - Episode 310 That's right! This week's Square Roots is sponsored by Manscaped, please use the promo code SQUAREROOTS at the checkout to receive your discount! We promise next week's commercial will be... more succinct. This week on Square Roots we dive into the space fantasy anime that is Xenogears. There's lots of religious imagery. Lots of swinging crosses. Accidental village melting. And big Gundam punchies! Also:

- Just what is Angel Dust? - Johnny's Chronic Elden Ring Problem - More JRPG Bingo Cards - Timothy's Himbo Energy Tragically Cut Short - Dan, the Creepy 40 Year Old Child - Correct Usage of Well Endowed - A Young, Suave, Hip Doc Brown This Week: Fei defeats Bart in combat and falls into the cavern! Next Week: Get Margie back to the Yggrasil! Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome new theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Final Fantasy Tactics Part 6 - Chocobo Funeral Drive-By Apr 11, 2022

Show notes

Square Roots - Episode 309 Holy crow! We all finished Final Fantasy Tactics! Does this mean we're all pro gamers now? There was no Andraste or anything. Heck, Matthew and Johnny even got Cloud for some pointless reason, as well as War of the Lion's Balthier. Also:

- Next Game Announced! - Monkey Ireland! - Blaidd Gaslights Johnny at the Taco Bell! - Letters Too Big To Read! - Surprisingly A Bad Human Guy Turns Into A Big Monster! - Falling Over With Sadness! - I Come From A Cosmic Tinderbox!

This Week: We finish the game! Next Week: You Defeat Ramsus and Miang!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome new theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Final Fantasy Tactics Part 5 - I Am the Chosen One, He's Just My Brother Apr 04, 2022

Show notes

Now that we're over the Wiegraf Hunt, it's full speed ahead plowing through the first half of Chapter Four of Final Fantasy Tactics. There's a whole lot of vampirism, oodles of bad guy cutaways, and adorable sprites spewing blood after being assassinated. Also:

- Happy April Betrayals - Fred Baddecisions and Lady Realgamer - Ramza's Cakes - A Lot of Lucavi Talk - The Mask was the Killgrave of The Mask - Plus Ten Gravy - A Ranking of Cids - Reverse Cowboy

This Week: We recruit Meliadoul! Next Week: We finish the game? Maybe?!

Contact Square Roots!

Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Final Fantasy Tactics Part 4 - Ein Fluffeldonks Mar 28, 2022

Show notes

Are you ready for the toughest boss fight in the game? Maybe the toughest boss fight in Square Roots history? Because we are, and friends, Belias The Giygas gets it. In this chunker of Final Fantasy Tactics we march towards Riovaynes Castle and somehow manage to pick up two new party members along the way? Will we use them? Probably not? Also:

- When you possess something smaller than a human it will explode its body! - Gushing with ghosts we know are ghosts! - Switcheroo Princess - I AM COME - Let the Bodies Hit the Floor, Verse 2

This Week: We finish Chapter 3! Next Week: We recruit Meliadoul! Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome new theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Final Fantasy Tactics Part 3 - Belias Dick Energy Mar 21, 2022

Show notes

Uh oh. Pack the little ones off to bed, because we're a little spicy on this salacious episode of Square Roots: A Rashomon Podcast! So much happens in this chunker of Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions as we try to make sense of which million characters is important, defeat a demon with a mouth tummy, and so much more! Also:

- Horny Columbo! - But there's also bunny MEN! - What Matt Does When There's Text on Screen! (NSFW) - Oogie Boogie Demon! - Alma's Super Awesome Invincibility Spell! - Wiegraf wants a Treat? This Week: We clear out the Orbonne Monastery fights! Next Week: We finish Chapter 3! Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome new theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Final Fantasy Tactics Part 2 - She's the Andraste of These Twelve Dudes Mar 14, 2022

Show notes

Hooray! We're all back, and there definitely were no arguments edited out of this episode! Instead, we're playing the first chunker of Chapter 2: that's right: you get to find out all sorts of secrets about the Princess! You keep bumping into Delita for some reason! Ramza is a grown up now and he's mad!

Also:

- No arguments whatsoever! - Matthew denies the existence of both TMNT 2: The Arcade Game *and* TMNT 3: The Manhattan Project! - Fred Savage as Delita, Macaulay Culkin as Ramza! - Matthew's Racing Stripe Beard That Goes From 0-69 in 2 seconds! - Nothing is argued about, ever! And so much more!

This Week: We rescue the "Princess" from Golgoda Gallows! Next Week: We finish the three fights in the Monastery in Chapter 3!

Hot Gaming News Special Episode Mar 07, 2022

Show notes

So... it turns out that Johnny was the only one really up for recording this week. Instead of doing a one hander, Johnny and Vanessa hang out and do a quick Hot Gaming News spectacular!

This Week: ... Next Week: We "rescue" the "princess" from Golgollada Gallows!

Final Fantasy Tactics Part 1 - Nobody Nose Feb 28, 2022

Show notes

Alright! We're now onto Matthew's Official Favourite Game of All Time: Final Fantasy Tactics! We're playing War of the Lions, but you can play whatever version you like, depending on if you like your translations Classic or Extra Spicy. There's plenty of talk about classes, class, and classiness this week! Also:

- Not Every Moustached Man is Brian David Gilbert - Hugh Can Dance - Matthew's Pleasant ASMR Robot - Watching Dad Shows - Robot Insurance And so much more! This Week: We finish Chapter 1! Next Week: Golgollada Gallows Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome new theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Dragon Age II Part 7 - Low Effort Post Feb 21, 2022

Show notes

We wrap up Dragon Age 2 with a surprise: everyone finished the game! It's a BioWarey miracle! But who lived? Who died? What was this week's Hot Gaming News anyway? Also:

- Walter Goblins - Miss McPoogle - Awkward Kissing Angles - Some Language Infomercial I've Never Heard Of - My Dock Is Dry, Baby - Vanessa's Confusing Contest This Week: We finish Dragon Age 2! Next Week: Defeating Milleuda (For Realsies)!

Dragon Age II Part 6 - Square Roots Doghouse Feb 14, 2022

Show notes

Uh oh! Jim's in the dog house after a computer related episode eating. But we truck on with Episode 302: The Revenge! In it we look at the DLC for BioWare's Dragon Age 2. Also:

- Top Bottoms of the Tower - Larry's Pandemic Haircut - Janica's Blue Warden Team Makes it to Regionals - Reacher's Floppy Hog - Another thing Johnny pronounces wrong - Beefy Boy Fountain This Week: We finish the Felicia DayLC and Legacy! Next Week: We finish Dragon Age 2! Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome new theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

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