Square Roots - THE Classic RPG Podcast

Latest Episodes:

Baldur's Gate Part 2 - Yakuzsazsa Gabor Apr 03, 2023

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Square Roots - Episode 358 Uh oh, someone didn't finish this chunker and it's not who you think! This week Johnny bombs trying to make his own Answer Smoosh, Vanessa has found true wizardly love, and we clear out some bandits AND yet another mine! Also:

- A Real Cabinet Meeting - Famous Vanessa Catchphrase "Time to Die" - Tampopokémon Red - Blacktalons & Chill - Matthew's Accidental Dream Corner - Our Listeners are Educated and Informed

This Week: We finish Chapter 4! Next Week: We finish Chapter 5 and probably 6!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven

Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Baldur's Gate Part 1 - Hashtag Chaotic Good Lifestyle Mar 27, 2023

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Square Roots - Episode 357 BioJanuWarey is over, welcome to Marchioware? BioMare? BioWarch? In this swashbuckling episode of Square Roots we all adopt old timey accents and swing into the thick of Faerun in Baldur's Gate. There's magicks! Hobgoblins! Spiders! And a walking 1990s meme! Also:

- Iambic Poonslammiter - Happy Bear Day - Answer Smoosh - Jizzle Physics - Another Bad Dragon Situation

This Week: We clear out chapter 2 (Nashkel Mines) in Baldur's Gate! Next Week: Chapters 3 and 4 and maybe 5 if that feels short

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven

Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Mass Effect 3 Part 8 - The Reapers Are Basically A Roomba Mar 20, 2023

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Square Roots - Episode 356 We did it! Since starting in 2017 we have now played through all of the original Mass Effect Trilogy, the only Mass Effect games that exist. No, there was no such thing as Galaxy or Andromeda or that one iPhone 3D one either. Nope.

Also:

- Normal People Watch the Food Network - #JohnDunsWasRight - Are You Ready For Sequel Slam 2023? - Somehow The Reapers Have The Citadel - Everyone's Favourite Character Major Coates

This Week: We finish Mass Effect 3! Next Week: We clear out chapter 2 (Nashkel Mines) in Baldur's Gate!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven

Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Mass Effect 3 Part 7 - A Romantic Canadian Evening Mar 13, 2023

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Square Roots - Episode 355 Johnny gets weird quasi-dates with straight guys flashbacks in this party filled, aquarium smashing, minigame loving chunker of BioWare's Mass Effect 3! Mass Effect lets its hair down and gets out of its ridiculous marching band outfit and finally lets you enjoy the world they've created, at least for this one DLC. There's evil betrayals! Clones! Gun toting Hanar! Grunt in the shower! And so much more! Also:

- The Princess of Burnsville - Vanessa's Milky White Obsession - The Whore / Horror Switcheroo - Shepherd Almost Died And It Was The Funniest Thing That Ever Happened - The Asari Don't Make Sense - The Normanddy of Thessius - Definitely Not Gay James Vega - Blasto: A Porn Parody

This Week: The Citadel DLC! Next Week: We finish Mass Effect 3!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven

Mass Effect 3 Part 6 - A Genetically Perfect Butt Mar 06, 2023

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Square Roots - Episode 354 Sadly we don't get to dispatch Kai Leng in this episode, but we do get to meet some big ol' space bugs in this chunker of BioWare's Mass Effect 3! We get a lot of DLC lore about the origin of the Reapers, get to splish splash in some water, and Miranda gets to wrap up her Cerberus ties and crappy father issues in one biotic swoop. Also an exciting edition of Jim's Front Page Failure! Also:

- Johnny Can't Tell if Jim Is Saying Horror Or Whore But Is Afraid To Ask - A Very Real George Miller Game - Jackson Cloink-Cloink - That Was Some Good Breevin' - Vectorman for the Sega Genesis - Vanessa's Chef Wrestler Persona

This Week: Leviathan, Horizon: Zero Ashleys (because she's probably dead) Next Week: The Citadel DLC!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven

Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Mass Effect 3 Part 5 - Pokemon Snap: Your Leaders May Lie, But Your Camera Won't Feb 27, 2023

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Square Roots - Episode 353 In this slicing and dicing episode of Square Roots Kai Leng may be back, but mysteriously Johnny has disappeared! Does this mean way more political rants? Of course! But Jim, Vanessa and Matthew will guide you through Rannoch and the end of the Geth wars and then discover a very important artifact on Thessia! Also:

- Way Too Much Political Talk - Full Page Failure: Death Match - The Crooshable Returns - The Illusive Man Has a Really Cool Idea - Sealed Shucker

This Week: We finish the Quarians homeworld stuff, Priority: Thessia Next Week: Leviathan, Horizon: Zero Ashleys (because she's probably dead)

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven

Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Mass Effect 3 Part 4 - Wet From Everything Feb 20, 2023

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Square Roots - Episode 352 This may be our raunchiest episode in a while, so hide it from sensitive ears! On this chunker of Square Roots we go through some fun classic DLC in BioWare's Mass Effect 3 and reunite with Tali, unless of course you're BimJanks and Tali is Super Dead. Also:

- English Sexy Talk - Aria Said F - Would You Dance To This Song? - Jim's Wild New Rules for Full Page Failure - Ashley Fell Asleep on a Hotdog - Downloadable Lesbian Content

This Week: We finish the Geth Ship and do the Omega DLC! Next Week: We finish the Quarians homeworld stuff, Leviathan, Priority: Thessia

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven

Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Mass Effect 3 Part 3 - Karlos the Thresher Maw Feb 13, 2023

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Square Roots - Episode 351 On this tragically romantic episode of Square Roots, Vanessa must choose - will she emotionally and physically bond with her snake boyfriend, or her himbo dummy human? PORQUE NO LOS DOS?! Also there's plenty of tough decisions on this Tchunker of BioWare's Mass Effect 3 like something about doing a genocide or not, or doing a different genocide or not, or watching fan favourites Dagg, Wreav and Padok Wiks sacrifice themselves. Also:

- The Illusive Woman - Jim Is Afraid of Improv - Clean Your Grint - 2023's Z-Snap - And Lo, Noah Did Get a Rad T-Rex, and It Was Cool - The Grim Darkness of the Far Future

This Week: We Save Tuchanka and Deal With A Citadel Coup! Next Week: We finish the Geth Ship and do the Omega DLC!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven

Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Mass Effect 3 Part 2 - PRUNES Feb 06, 2023

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Square Roots - Episode 350 Shepherd takes some selfie hints from the 21st century in this action-packed chunker of Mass Effect 3! There's meeting a 50,000 year old Protheon, hot gossip with the lady Krogan, and seeing Jack's clothing journey. Also:

- Your Favourite Mary Kate & Ashley Songs - The Pegger - New Game Plus Elementary School - Her Two Big Front Mounted Processors - Ensign Pringles Saves The Day - Bring Your Bits! Whatever!

This Week: Extract Lady Krogan, Javik, Biotic School, and explore some planets! Next Week: Reach the end of Rannoch, the Turian homeworld!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven

Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

Mass Effect 3 Part 1 - Press Y to Yeet Jan 30, 2023

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Square Roots - Episode 347 Finally, on the second to last day of BioJanuWarey, we start Mass Effect 3! That's right. Shepherd, Wrex, Kaiden (or Ashley if you're a monster) and Doctor Chocolates are back in this action packed chunker. Also:

- Mister BAMF Himself - I Thought We Were Doing ME Tonight! - Just A Regular Butt - The Pros and Cons of Chocolate Fountains - Future Teen Slang - I... Want... Clean... Faces

This Week: It's BioJanuWarey and we play until The end of the Primarch Mission (Turian moon) in Mass Effect 3! Next Week: Extract Lady Krogan, Javik, Biotic School, and explore some planets!

Our Patreon: http://patreon.com/squarerootspodcast Thanks to Steven Morris for his awesome theme! You can find him at: https://twitter.com/BeigeOnBeige and https://www.youtube.com/user/morrissteven

Contact Square Roots! Twitter: @squarerootspod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/486022898258197/ Email: squarerootspodcast (at) gmail (dort) com

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