Self Helpful with Kevin Miller

Latest Episodes:

The 12 Steps Benefits For All Of Humanity w/ Ian Morgan Cron Jan 27, 2025

Show notes

Most everyone has heard of the twelve steps concept associated with Alcoholics Anonymous. I bring it here for all of us, whether you think you are addicted to anything or not, which is an arguable claim for anyone. Ian Morgan Cron is the bestselling author of The Road Back to You: An Enneagram Journey to Self-Discovery, which has sold over one million copies. He’s a psychotherapist, Enneagram teacher, Episcopal priest, and the host of the popular podcast Typology. I had Ian on the show before to talk about the message in his book, The Story of You: An Enneagram Journey to Becoming Your True Self. Since he was on my show, Ian, this leader of so many, relapsed. It’s not an incredibly sordid story, but he has a past history of substance abuse. All these years later, he found himself reliant on some substances and questioning himself in significant ways. In this episode we talk through his story. We talk about what Ian calls, “the great human ache.” We discuss what addiction is, the need we all have for community to keep us on a healthy path, and how the 12 steps are relevant for anyone seeking well-being. Ian breaks down how the 12 steps covers making peace with God, making peace with self, making peace with others and cultivating a healthy and fulfilling life. Ian has captured all this in a brand new book, The Fix: How the Twelve Steps Offer a Surprising Path of Transformation for the Well-Adjusted, the Down-and-Out, and Everyone In Between. I hope you’ll join us in this conversation.

Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin

Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial.

Use my promo code WHATDRIVESYOU for 10% off on any CleanMyMac's subscription plans

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How To Be Free From The Many Masks We Wear w/ Lewis Howes Jan 24, 2025

Show notes

I don’t think any of us chooses to wear a mask. But creating and wearing them is taught to us from early on. And in some cases, it’s a necessity to survive. Now here we are. Are we wearing a mask? More than one? I’m bringing an incredible show back from the archives. Lewis Howes is the host of the podcast, The School of Greatness, one of the biggest podcasts alive at this point. Lewis is a big, strapping looking guy. A former pro ball player. He looks like the definition of “all-American.” But few know that he began life with a learning disability, which led to being alone and bullied in school, to being sexually abused as a child. Years back he took on the topic of masculinity. Lewis’ research looked at the majority of stress, anxiety, and pressure men feel is due to the masks they wear. Now, if you’ll listen in, I feel the concept pertains very much to women too. Think of masks as certain personas we fall or buy into, and get trapped in. Then live from in a limiting life construct. Do you have any stress or anxiety? Do you feel any pressure? Would you like to be free of it? Let’s look at the masks you may find out you are wearing. You can connect with Lewis at “The School of Greatness” podcast, which you’ll find at the top of the podcast charts. You can get his book, The Mask of Masculinity, wherever you buy books, and find Lewis anywhere at Lewis Howes.

Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin

Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial.

Use my promo code WHATDRIVESYOU for 10% off on any CleanMyMac's subscription plans

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Everything We Do Is Simply An Effort To Create A Feeling Of Well-Being Jan 23, 2025

Show notes

With the big question and quest of what do we actually want for our lives, it strikes me that it is all just an effort to feel a certain way. We strive and strive for this and for that and to me it seems like a great mind game. I am not discounting the things we want to achieve, but I’m questioning some of what we do as a means to an end. I have found myself going after things I think I want. Then when I ask myself why, and why again, I realize it’s often to generate a feeling. And then I ask myself, do I really need to pursue whatever it is in order to feel the way I want to feel? Let’s talk about it.

Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin

Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial.

Use my promo code WHATDRIVESYOU for 10% off on any CleanMyMac's subscription plans

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Books We Love vs The Books That Have Actually Changed Our Lives Jan 22, 2025

Show notes

I recently posted a question on Facebook. The question was, “What is a book you have read, where you can honestly look back and say that after you read it, you made a tangible life-change for the better? What is the book, and what was the change?” About 75 people shared around 60 books. They could easily testify to the knowledge they received from the books, but very few could specify the change they made as a result. I have some thoughts on this.

Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin

Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial.

Get 20% off your first probiotic membership order at pendulumlife.com/drivesyou

Go to cozyearth.com/driven and use code DRIVEN for an exclusive 40% discount

Use my promo code WHATDRIVESYOU for 10% off on any CleanMyMac's subscription plans

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What Would You Do If All Obstacles Were Gone Jan 21, 2025

Show notes

I find that people are far more clear on what keeps them from having what they want, than being clear on what they actually want. The job, the kids, the money, the chores, the upbringing, the government, the economy, the devil, and an infinite list of culprits are to blame for keeping people down. For stealing their dreams. For keeping them from what they want. However I find that if you ask the question, “OK, imagine you have 10 million in the bank. You have everyone’s support in your life. Now, what would you do? What would you do with your days?” Most people are very unclear. Which to me belies that many people actually want the grind and the responsibilities because without them, they don’t know themselves and they have little idea what they would do to occupy their time. The grind might as well be the purpose if we have no other clear purpose.

Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin

Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial.

Get 20% off your first probiotic membership order at pendulumlife.com/drivesyou

Go to cozyearth.com/driven and use code DRIVEN for an exclusive 40% discount

Use my promo code WHATDRIVESYOU for 10% off on any CleanMyMac's subscription plans

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Unearthing The Mystery Of Knowing What You Really Want w/ Tracey Gee Jan 20, 2025

Show notes

The catalyst for writing my book, What Drives You, was realizing what I most wanted for my children, was for them to know what they truly want, and wrap their lives around it. From this inspiration I realized that while I had always been driven, I had often been unclear what I wanted, and what I was driving toward. As time goes on, I continue to perceive that truly, clearly knowing what one wants is one of the most elusive things of life. And getting clarity on one wants, may just be the ultimate success. So in this show, I bring on another expert on discovering what you want. Tracey Gee has also devoted herself to this quest for helping people understand what they truly, authentically want. Tracey is a leadership coach and consultant who has done extensive research in workshops and personal coaching with individuals seeking to discover what they want. She has a new book that caught my attention, The Magic of Knowing What You Want: A Practical Guide to Unearthing the Wisdom of Your Desires. We sat down to discuss how unaware people are of what they really want, and then talked through methodologies Tracey uses to help people, that I am very intrigued by. You can find Tracey’s new book, The Magic of Knowing What You Want, at Amazon, and find her at traceygee.me.

Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin

Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial.

Get 20% off your first probiotic membership order at pendulumlife.com/drivesyou

Go to cozyearth.com/driven and use code DRIVEN for an exclusive 40% discount

Use my promo code WHATDRIVESYOU for 10% off on any CleanMyMac's subscription plans

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Boundaries, Leadership, & Influence with the legendary Dr Henry Cloud Jan 17, 2025

Show notes

I get to have deep conversations with people who have had great influence in the lives of so many people. Dr Henry Cloud became synonymous with the term boundaries after his groundbreaking book, Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life, and has influenced millions of people in doing just that, taking control of their lives. I was a mere 21 years old when Dr Cloud’s Boundaries book published and wouldn’t become aware of boundaries for another 21 years, and wouldn’t truly implement them in my life till much later. Today, 33 years later, as I record this, the book is ranked #256. Incredible. I got the chance to sit down with him and Tom Ziglar a few years ago when Henry brought his focus and insight into leadership and influence. We began talking about boundaries, then got into leadership and influence. Influence is one of my favorite topics, as we all want influence. Without it, we can’t help anyone. I think you’ll get great insight from our discussion. You can find all Dr Cloud has to offer at his website, drcloud.com. And I don’t know anyone who would not benefit from reading his book on Boundaries.

Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin

Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial.

Get 20% off your first probiotic membership order at pendulumlife.com/drivesyou

Go to cozyearth.com/driven and use code DRIVEN for an exclusive 40% discount

Use my promo code WHATDRIVESYOU for 10% off on any CleanMyMac's subscription plans

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Never Quit The Destination But You May Need To Quit Many Methods Of Getting There Jan 16, 2025

Show notes

In the industry of self-improvement and personal and professional development, we are all familiar with the concept of not quitting. Staying committed. But in my experience, personally and in working with so many other aspiring people, we very often confuse the meaning of staying committed and not quitting. Here is a quick analogy: the Superbowl is coming up soon. Each team is committed to getting to the end zone and scoring. That is what they stay committed to. They don’t quit striving for it. But to get there they run plays. Imagine if they ran a play and it didn’t work. But somebody was yelling, “Hey, don’t quit! Stay committed to the plan and run that same play again!” So they do, and it doesn’t work again. But, don’t quit! So they run it again. Hold on. The plan is not the play. The plan is getting to the endzone. If that play doesn’t work, try a different play. So in your life, what is the end goal, result, or destination? The plan is to get there. Stay committed. Don’t quit. But you may need to try a lot of methods to get there. Let’s break it down a bit more. And this wraps up my series with world record mountain climber Jenn Drummond as my muse. You can find her on the Seek Your Next Summit podcast and her new book is, Break Proof: 7 Strategies To Build Resilience and Achieve Your Life Goals.

Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin

Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial.

Get 20% off your first probiotic membership order at pendulumlife.com/drivesyou

Go to cozyearth.com/driven and use code DRIVEN for an exclusive 40% discount

Use my promo code WHATDRIVESYOU for 10% off on any CleanMyMac's subscription plans

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are You Modeling A Life Others (like your kids) Would Want To Emulate Jan 15, 2025

Show notes

My recent conversation with epic mountain climber Jenn Drummond, and my recent time with all my children has me again focused on the life I’ve emulated to others. I have much in my life I’m proud of, but I’ve also spent many, many years just grinding things out. I chose to have seven kids and adopt two more. Most people respond to that with respect and as if I’ve done something valiant. Maybe I have, maybe I haven’t. But what my kids have seen as a result is a parent that is really busy. I went through a long period of life where I didn’t play. I didn’t do leisure. I didn’t “hang out.” I was productive. One, it was how I fed my self image. Two, it was fairly necessary with up to nine kids at home. I never asked myself what I was modeling for my kids. I ask myself that now, and like Jenn, I’ve altered my life accordingly. Let’s talk about it. Find Jenn Drummond at the Seek Your Next Summit podcast and check out her new book, Break Proof: 7 Strategies To Build Resilience and Achieve Your Life Goals.

Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin

Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial.

Get 20% off your first probiotic membership order at pendulumlife.com/drivesyou

Go to cozyearth.com/driven and use code DRIVEN for an exclusive 40% discount

Use my promo code WHATDRIVESYOU for 10% off on any CleanMyMac's subscription plans

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What Is Significant To You Is All That Matters Jan 14, 2025

Show notes

In yesterday’s episode I was with Jenn Drummond, world-record mountain climber, and talked about her story of a near life-ending car wreck that changed her perspective on life and got her looking at living a life of significance instead of just the so-called cultural success. So she went after the world’s biggest mountains. Why was that significant to her? I’d say…who cares? You might look at climbing mountains and wonder why that matters. And I’d say, it doesn’t. And doesn’t have to. The point is it means something to Jenn. And the bigger point of this episode is, what means something to you? What makes you feel proud of you? Is it a physical achievement like climbing mountains or running a 5k or marathon? Or is it learning to dance? Or learning a new language? Or volunteering somewhere? Or is it simply having a relationship and a family and working a solid job to pay the mortgage and be a solid member of your community? What is significant to you and helps you feel good about yourself is what matters. Let’s pursue it a little further. You can find Jenn Drummond at the Seek Your Next Summit podcast and her new book and my muse for this series is, Break Proof: 7 Strategies To Build Resilience and Achieve Your Life Goals.

Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin

Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial.

Get 20% off your first probiotic membership order at pendulumlife.com/drivesyou

Go to cozyearth.com/driven and use code DRIVEN for an exclusive 40% discount

Use my promo code WHATDRIVESYOU for 10% off on any CleanMyMac's subscription plans

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices