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Narcisistas — Comedy
Narcisistas

Buckle Up for some bull s**t. Hello and welcome to the gayest hour of your week! We see you, sitting there wondering why two flawless narcissists think they should be talking into a microphone at you every week? First of all, thank you! And we are SO glad you asked! We met our Junior year of High School and have been sistas ever since. The only thing we care about more than ourselves is each other and BEYONCÉ. Every week hear us talk about a lot of wild s**t we know nothing about all in a haze of smoke, drink, mirrors and glitter! Yes we’re doing ok why does everyone keep asking that?! Can’t reiterate enough that we really have no idea what we’re talking about so occasionally we’ll convince someone who does to have a kiki. Every episode also features our producer Leif. He’s white and straight so don’t worry about him! You should take us extremely seriously and do everything in your power to make us SCARY famous. Oh and if you don’t like us we’ll die. K? You’re welcome!

Latest Episodes:

EPISODE 121: THIS B*TCH: Ariana Grande Pt.5 Sep 26, 2019

Show notes

We start this one off with some LOVE for the Grandmas and a small but beautiful moment for comedy legend and queen GMA! Ariana gives us some hope and Court makes one of her signature DUMB JOKES! Put your pups on a private jet and let's get into PART FIVE of THIS B*TCH ARIANA GRANDE!!! We got a new album coming cause these b*tches NEVER stop working! From Halloween Scream Queens to the TRUE meaning of XXX-Mas! You don't go to Christina for the 8 Counts! The MAGINANATORS missed the PEEYAW! So a very big PEEYAW to the Dangerous Woman era! A Saturday Night SLAY, the Pete Davidson chemistry and WHICH song is BABY SHARK for the GAYS!?!! Make it Audrey Hepburn meets slutty but NOW! The charts love Ari so she can't stop breaking records! Zoolander is a plane movie! Mac Miller! Hairspray LIVE! Fallon rumors! ALL the VEVO views! We love dick on this pod! Stay in your lane Aereola! She getting browner and blonder so lets LEAN into the URBAN aesthetic! Plus like a burning car in the middle of the highway we discuss the shocking Manchester bombing. We start this pod sad... so why not end sad! The silver lining??? Stevie Wonder STANS Ariana Grande!!!! Also he could GET IT! YOU HAVE TO LISTEN TO THIS EP! THEN RATE! REVIEW! FOLLOW! REPOST! SUBSCRIBE! VISIT www.narcisistas.com and wash your face no matter how drunk you get!

EPISODE 120: THIS B*TCH: Ariana Grande Pt.4 Sep 19, 2019

Show notes

Wil's ACTUALLY thoughtful and heartfelt while Court is fake as F**K... no wonder Leif has the GIFT to be GAY! It's part FOUR ARIANA GRANDE THIS B*TCH! We pick back up in 2014 and THIS B*TH has 3 songs in the Top 10 and two #1 albums within one year... so go ahead and sit your dainty ass on a stool and let's get INTO IT! She's shifting from bubblegum pop to a darker 90's influence so look out for OOKIE SPOOKIE matted locks Canadian icon The Weeknd (all the white women are wasted from the waist down). The Aesthetic is soo right (unlike Katy Perry x Party City)!! ALSO Who isn't trying to bang Santa?! From the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show to Cloverfield the Music video we cover it all! PLUS! Big Sean! Cat Ears! What happens when cuffing season gets UNCUFFED?! We end by throwing is allllll the way back to 1776 when we licked a donut! Get 'Merica back on your side by doing celebrity singing impressions people!!! THEN LISTEN TO THIS EP! THEN RATE! REVIEW! FOLLOW! REPOST! SUBSCRIBE! VISIT www.narcisistas.com and remember SEX is all about FLEXIBILITY!! Part 5 out NEXT THURS!

EPISODE 119: THIS B*TCH: Ariana Grande Pt.3 Feat: Tracey Carnazzo Sep 12, 2019

Show notes

You got me walkin side to side because CHIVALRY is DEAD! That's right people it's PART 3 THIS B*TCH ARIANA GRANDE! Court is trying to be Rihanna, Wil is about to step on a neck and Leif is werkin too much! The heteros strike again!! Let's cut the CHIT CHAT because our guest today is a LEGEND. The one and only TRACEY CARNAZZO joins us!! Tracey is Ari's red hair because she's simply BROKEN. It's all a big MOOD! BRITNEY said it best when she just SHAVED her head people! It's a wild episode so buckle up and get ready to fist fight your grandma (the one with the great A$$)! We discuss Ariana's influences from Mariah to Rachel Dolezal... she's black l'm black we're all BLACK! I've got Raven Simone's DNA swab! PLUS! How long are you REALLY gonna wait for Kid Rock to finish smoking crack? Tracy and Leif scissor and which one of us cut our own Hannah Montana bangs?! It was back when Fyre fest was just a twinkle in Ja's eye!! From Total Ariana Live to 106 and we haven't gotten there yet this Ep is one of our best! Miss Grande's strong POV, forgetting what she recorded and a 9/11 sunglass story that will make you weep! Tracey finishes this one off by laying out the Ariana and Pete TEA so you MUST LISTEN TO THIS EP! THEN RATE! REVIEW! FOLLOW! REPOST! SUBSCRIBE! VISIT www.narcisistas.com and make some NOISE if you left prom to blow a guy to ~*fOoLiSh!*~

EPISODE 118: THIS B*TCH: Ariana Grande Pt.2 Sep 05, 2019

Show notes

Wil is a dangerous woman but the kids still love him because he can sit on a D**K, Court is over here licking donuts for her wedding diet and Leif is BANG BANG cause it's a hot boi summer baby!! That's right everybody it's THIS B*TCH ARIANA GRANDE PART TWO!! The year is 2012 and we weren't even born yet but the girls on Victorious sure were!!! From an emotionless Emotions cover to the MAC MILLER kiss heard around the internet you know Nickelodeon was holding on for DEAR LIFE! Too bad Court is basically the next Austen Mahone! BUY our memoir it's called LISTEN TO THE GAYS!!! We cover the making of her debut album that brought out all the 90's R&B legends... I mean sure some of it was trash but so are the old episodes of THIS POD! Before she was the most followed woman on Instagram she was an American apparel catalog with 166million views that Billbord didn't seem to know! OOP! Plus! A Beyoncé GAG that could be a choking hazard! Big Sean is our priest!? A Spanglish album no one asked for?! Oh and come on Italians! You already got Snooki!! It's time for us to school some adults cause the children already know! If you on your Suit & Thai food you're gonna love this Ep! SO LISTEN UP! THEN RATE! REVIEW! FOLLOW! REPOST! SUBSCRIBE! VISIT www.narcisistas.comand don't forget BRITNEY would've been SHERYL if she has the money!!!!

EPISODE 117: THIS B*TCH: Ariana Grande Pt.1 Aug 29, 2019

Show notes

And a very first ENGAGED PEEYAW to all our listeners out there! Wil is tweeting about Normani because she wrote the song, Court is a child bride engaged to a successful comedian and Leif is greedy BUT he LOVES his MOMMY!!! That's right ladies and gentleGAYS we are kicking off another THIS B*TCH series with... ARIANA GRANDE! You're not going to believe what year ol' GRANDE AEROLES was born... let's just say we were smoking cigarettes by then! We go all the way back to the beginning of her journey... her parents were CEOS and she was a weird deranged goth child! We know! We STAN!!! From Prep school and the French Horn to the Florida Panthers (who for the record we DO NOT know) all the way to a big time move to Los Angeles to be on... BROADWAY!! We have all the scalding hot TEA that made this donut licker who she is today! One day you're using the internet to research 9/11 the next DING DONG Nickelodeon's here! Court is known in most circles for her LIGHTLY DIVERSE group of friends, Wil is THE CHILD DETECTIVE and our tiny baby sex doll has a voice to bring the HOUSE DOWN! From the YouTube covers that made her a household name to the first single that had us looking for Jordan Sparks! YOU MUST LISTEN TO THIS EP! THEN RATE! REVIEW! FOLLOW! REPOST! SUBSCRIBE! VISIT www.narcisistas.com and come back next week for BIG NIPPLES PT.2!!!

EPISODE 116: CalexicoED Feat: Dave Vendley Aug 22, 2019

Show notes

There's a SPICY SEXY energy for this one people!!! Wil's got her Jesus say YES braids, Court's got alcoholic family FLAVA and Leif is actually Dax Shepard! Hold onto your wigs cause it's a LEGENDS ONLY pod today!! Joining us in the studio we have co-owner of Calexico and stunning bad b*tch... DAVE VENDLEY!! Dave is falling down at the Super Bowl but still snatched and figuring it out! So many things to talk about with our guest so we start from the beginning! How the "genius" behind Calexico was actually that they were just broke! Ew! From the beginnings of the business fighting in Street Cart gangs and bringing back women to his room full of FREEZERS. Yikes. To googling "How to run a business" the story of Dave's journey is incredible!! Oh yea and we can't have a Dave Vendley Ep without talking of his white rapping days PLUS shit going down with Cappadonna from Wu Tang! Dave's kinda like the Tony Robbins of starting businesses so he serves some scalding hot advice tea for you ENTREPRENISTAS our thurrrr!! Just when you thought it couldn't get any better we end this one with a freaky round of WHAT GETS YOU HARDER!! From Fred Durst's Jazz night to Kid Rock's dirt bike collection this guy might be our first NON PEDOPHILE! You can catch Dave pretending he's not drunk at all CALEXICO locations! You also cannot MISS THIS EP! RATE! REVIEW! FOLLOW! REPOST! SUBSCRIBE! VISIT www.narcisistas.com and COURT'S GETTING MARRIED ON A DISNEY CRUISE!!!

EPISODE 115: Mrs. Salengo Feat: Casey James Salengo Aug 15, 2019

Show notes

We've never been so moved by straight love y'all!! Wil is Blue Ivy hittin the choreo, Court is SINGLE LADIES cause DUH and Leif is calling Courtney fat!! Take a hint b*tch!! We talking ENGAGEMENT so naturally our guest today is the funniest... sexiest... BIGGEST man alive Casey James Salengo aka MR HUSBAND!! A true GAG! They gettin married!! We get the behind the scenes breakdown of the LEGENDARY engagement! Edges are still on the floor of The Bowery! From Casey hiding behind that curtain to trying not to die he really pulled it off y'all! How's the wedding planning so far?! Well not to be DRAMATIC but they're getting matching Bugs Bunny tattoos!! Listen we don't need napkins at our wedding it's going to be a Beyoncé vs. Bruce dance party! They're both gonna gain so much weight! Can you still do drugs when you're married? What is Courtney's 4?! Was the proposal actually between a sunset cruise or Trump's second inauguration?! Did Casey only date dudes before Courtney?! If you haven't sent us money you're not invited!! We'll send you a Thank You card! The origins of Courtney and Caseys love and how a Power Cobra Clutch makes women melt. Big DADDY big DAY!!!!!!! He's gonna wear her tits as a scarf SO U BETTA RATE! REVIEW! FOLLOW! REPOST! SUBSCRIBE! VISIT www.narcisistas.com and no SNIFFIN at The Strip Club!!!

RERELEASE: EPISODE 67: New York City Feat: Tom Delgado Aug 08, 2019

Show notes

Joining The Narcisistas in the LOUVRE... I'm sorry The Brain Machine recording studio this week is Comedian, Film Maker and NYC Historian Tour Guide.. TOM DELGADO!! Let's get into it! Wil is APE$HIT recycled hair-dos commanding the room EFFORTLESSLY, Court is getting Jay-Z together but in a lipliner because she found HERSELF, Leif misses the Obamas but they're busy dancing at OTRII and Tom is singing HALO at a Singapore Hospital because The Narcisistas are SICKening! This week the subject is NEW YORK CITY and thank goodness because the bone structure is CORRECT! We teach Tom to EAT, take a moment for our HOTNESS, throw some European shade and find out why Court spends every morning at the top of the Empire State Building! "Pull over for the Picture!" and other hot Tourist Tips so you don't get the $hit beat outta ya! We cover wild celeb sightings (was that William DaFoe arguing with a woman in Chinese?!) and we answer questions like... are New Yorkers mean? Here's a hint... NO! But they will take a shit on 10th Ave! We talk NYC's brand, how it's changing the city, where so much of the public's tax money is going and a LOT of other smart stuff! DELGADO for MAYOR! Get involved on a local level people! This might actually be the most factual pod in Narcisistas HERstory! So listen up if you want to hear all about The Big Apple including Lindsay Lohan's Pu$$ at PLUM, SJP singing Beyoncé and Steven Tyler feeling her beat! We ALSO end this Ep with a tough round of our favorite game WHO'S YOUR DIVA?! Shoutouts to NY natives for not caring about Brandy!! RATE! REVIEW! FOLLOW! REPOST! SUBSCRIBE! VISIT www.narcisistas.com for info on our NEXT LIVE SHOW!! August 30th at The Footlight!! We love y'all!

EPISODE 114: THIS B*TCH: Taylor Swift Pt.4 w/ Harry Hill Aug 01, 2019

Show notes

Wil is Wildest Dreams because he's simply blown away by the bone structure of our guest and Court is the CATS trailer because... what the F**K! It's our LAST Episode of the Taylor Swift THIS B*TCH era!! We had to make it a legends only Pod so joining us today is Swiftie and ICON HARRY HILL!!! He's BACK on the pod but the real question is WHO is in the suitcase!?! When did our sweet Harry become a Swiftie? Is it what happens when you get burnt out on Bangerz? It's ALL the Gaggedy Anne Tea including Harry's thoughts on THE alleged queerness! PLUS! THE Social Media clear that SHOOK the world! Suing for $1! The Kimye drama! The BRAVERY of messy hair! AND... you know there's more records to break!! ANYWAYS It was nice to see black people in End Game! Everything from Reputation (including the POWER of a rain show) all the way up to today's Lover era! It's very Pets 2!! And I am TELLING YOU... I'm not seeing Cats!! How do we feel about Taylor now? Did we convert?! Are we Swifties?! GUESS YOU HAVE TO GRAB A VODKA DIET COKE AND LISTEN TO THIS EP! THEN RATE! REVIEW! FOLLOW! REPOST! SUBSCRIBE! VISIT www.narcisistas.com and for the record... there is room for everyone... including MEGAN TRAINOR!!

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EPISODE 113: THIS B*TCH: Taylor Swift Pt.3 w/ Emily Winter Jul 25, 2019

Show notes

Wil is LOOK what you made me do, Court is ACTUALLY getting paid and Leif is just putting his fingers in Court's mouth! Unbelievable! Joining us today on the pod is writer, comedian, actress, ANGEL... EMILY WINTER!! Emily just got married in a rainbow dress (Taylor wishes) so she's too busy looking at pictures of herself to worry about Leif being a ghost! This is Episode 113 that was recorded on the 13th... The Taylor Swift energy is ookie spookie in THIS B*TCH Pt.3!! Last time we left Taylor we had one foot in the queer theory so let's jump back in! Taylor's rich and skinny and pretty... and she's still the only DIVA who's a DORK! We cover all the BOPS, the Guinness world records and that HIPSTER that pissed her off! This era of Taylor is giving full white woman fantasy so let's give the basic b*tches their anthem! Frap-A-Chin-o's! Plus a Tim McGraw Grey's Anatomy moment! The 1989 era was pop perfection so it was hard to hate T.Swift... but we find a way! The problematic message of Bad Blood and the racial blind spots are a little tough for 2.2 billion views girl! Ugh but The Blank Space video is SO GOOD!! And that STUNNING True Detective intro?!! We can feel the unsubscribes! Let the dorks rise!!!! The Grammys! The VMAS! The AMAs! The CMAS! The POWER! Come on DICK! Show us your TWAYLOR! Next week is PART 4!! LISTEN TO THIS EP! THEN RATE! REVIEW! FOLLOW! REPOST! SUBSCRIBE! VISIT www.narcisistas.com and come on! You can find one black person in Africa!

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