Moms Working Overtime

Latest Episodes:

Late Night Pep Talk: Instincts & Attachment Sep 14, 2023

Show notes

As a mom, it's completely normal to crave and need breaks from our children so we can rest, reset, and fill our own cups. But it's also not unusual for us to miss them the instant we leave the house. Feeling these things doesn't mean we shouldn't take the breaks.
I personally really struggle to be away from my motherhood role. I allow it to consume me completely and am definitely guilty of putting myself on the back burner sometimes.
Why do we beat ourselves up for feeling any of these things? Can we not just trust our intuitions and validate our own feelings without worrying about how something is perceived or what someone else has to say about it?
What we have to remember is that these things all exist by perfect design...and we feel them on PURPOSE.
If you dive into the research on mothers and children, analyzing the psychology behind all of it. our rollercoaster of emotions are all validated. Specifically, studies performed in 2019 looked into attachment patterns between mothers and their children, why they exist, and what "typical" responses were. You see, the attachments we have to our child or children begin to have influence in the womb.
And what they find is that these attachments, in place to drive us to instinctually protect and care for our children, serve more purposes than I could even discuss in one podcast. Developing secure attachments to our children relieves distress on both sides, restores physiological homeostasis, and it encourages safe and healthy exploration in our children. These strong attachments lead to us, as mothers, being pre-wired to feel anxiety or tension when distance is created between us. All of these things were designed perfectly this way and impact our children for their lifetime.
WOAH.
I think we can all agree motherhood is an all consuming role. Therefore, it's normal to crave a reset. It's also normal to mourn separation.
It's. All. Normal.
You better take a break before YOU break.
Because that kind of exhaustion is no badge of honor, mama.
Give yourself permission to take a break, but validate yourself that you can feel sad to be away from your children and STILL need that break. It's actually empowering to recognize and provide yourself with that time when needed. As moms, we should encourage each other to take the breaks rather than running ourselves into the ground, which we all know our entire household pays for.
If you don't have a village, let us help you create one.
And mama, if the thought of stepping away isn't something you're ready for yet, THAT'S OKAY, TOO.
Let's normalize that we all have motherly instincts and are doing the best we can and put a stop to having opinions about how another mama should live out this chapter.
No matter what side you sit on, I think you're doing absolutely amazing and I hope you know that you deserve a break when you need it.

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Thank you so much for listening!
Love what you hear? Please share the podcast and leave a review! It means the world to me and helps me reach more moms so I can remind them how amazing they're doing.

Late Night Pep Talk: Am I Enough? Sep 11, 2023

Show notes

How often do you sit down at the end of the day as a mom and wonder "Did I do enough?"
We're ALL guilty of this at one point in time or another. The anxiety of "Could I have done more?" is enough to keep us up at night, every night. Why do we spiral into these thoughts?
Tonight I'm diving into these intrusive thoughts and how we can combat them.
The first thing we HAVE to consider is how we even define "enough" and where these beliefs are coming from. Often, social media provides us with false ideologies of what a "good mom" looks like and gives us unrealistic expectations of how we should be in this role.
If we can stop, take a deep breath, and see ourselves through the lens of the people we love and who love us most, often we see a completely different image. We're not just ENOUGH, we're MORE THAN enough.
We must remember that we were designed perfectly for this role, but that this role was never intended to be performed perfectly. You are exactly who your family needs you to be.
This podcast will help you shift your perspective and rewire your thoughts when it comes to defining "enough." I hope you walk away after listening and feel a wave of reassurance that you're doing so amazing!

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Late Night Pep Talk: Obligation Sep 07, 2023

Show notes

It's so easy as moms to get sucked into the negativity in our world today, live in fear, or fall into a dark hole of worry thinking about the life our children may have as they grow. We wish we could just protect them from the bad things that exist. And it's so easy to worry about things that are out of our control.
These are challenges that our generation of mothers has to handle at such a large scale as a result of how connected we are. At all times, we have a feed of information coming through the TV, our phones, and social media. We aren't privileged to what was almost a bit of oblivion that past generations of moms were blessed to have. Instead, we consume hours of content each day that makes us question all of our decisions in motherhood!
Sometimes as mothers, we get TOO focused on the wrong things. The things that are maybe out of our control or we focus on problems TOO big for us to manage on our own. We can be better about just focusing on the obligation we have inside of our own home.
When we became parents, we accepted this obligation to raise good humans. But it starts with the example we set for them and the way we show up for them. As Ed Mylett says, things that children learn are "caught, not taught." If we want our children to be kind, smart, healthy, empathetic, etc., then they must catch us being those things consistently.
Our greatest legacy is the children we raise and send out into the world. If you think about any of the unsettling, insane, discouraging, horrifying things happening in our world, WE can change that through the way we show up for our children. This is a hill I will die on - present parenting will change the world.
Much of what happens in our world today is our children's cry for help. For attention. For love. For guidance. For faith. For structure. For discipline. For hope. We can provide this.
Let's change the world, mamas.

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Late Night Pep Talk: Validating the Hard Sep 04, 2023

Show notes

Motherhood is no easy feat.
In fact, it's probably the furthest thing from easy.
As moms, sometimes we just need someone to validate the way that we're feeling. We don't expect them to fix the problem, and sometimes there's not even a clear solution anyways. But what we do need is for someone to be there for us simply by saying, "It IS hard, mama."
As humans, when we share our problems, struggles, or anxieties with the people we love, we are often looking for nothing more than validation. And we can provide this in return as well. One of my favorite books is "I Hear You" by Michael Sorensen and it teaches you that you can validate someone even without agreeing with them. It is truly a superpower when it comes to strengthening connections with other humans and building relationships. And it is a necessary piece of motherhood.
Another message that comes to mind is one I heard from Ed Mylett - that sometimes people just need us to sit in their pain with them. We aren't responsible for making the pain go away, and often doing so is unintentionally selfish on our part. But instead, we just need to sit there with them, or have someone sit with us.
Of course, we constantly want to evaluate our personal relationships and make sure there is a balance of give and take.
Receiving validation in motherhood is crucial. If you don't have a community of women to validate your experience or sit in the "hard" with you, please find that here with Moms Working Overtime.
You're incredible. You're doing amazing. And don't give up, okay?

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Late Night Pep Talk: Humble Enough to Find the Humor Aug 31, 2023

Show notes

You know what’s worse than going through something awful or humiliating as a mom? Going through it feeling like you’re the only person to ever experience it...or going through it thinking you’re being drowned in judgment. We've all been there. And in today's episode, we're going to talk about how to handle it without wrecking our entire day.
The sooner we accept that motherhood is this immense, never ending trial and error process, the better off we will be...and the faster we’ll master the skill of laughing at ourselves, learn that it’s silly to sweat the small stuff, and begin to celebrate identifying our weaknesses.
Literally NO mom is perfect. I'll remind you of this a million times! Even the "instafamous" mom on your social media feed doesn't have it all figured out. It’s like the coolest guarantee about motherhood - no matter what you’re going through, there is a mama somewhere in the world going through the exact same thing. Solidarity, sister.
Generating a new perspective of these situations allows us to generate a new response for our children. When our responses are no longer anchored to the fear of judgement or society's opinion, we can show up so much better for our children.
Along the way, you become humble enough to find the humor in each situation. After all, we're all just doing our best...right mama?

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Late Night Pep Talk: Exhaustion Aug 28, 2023

Show notes

A staple of my brand as a mom is "this exhaustion is a privilege" so it's only fitting to make it the topic of our first Late Night Pep Talk.
Let's petition for more of the "finding strength through gratitude" message on social media and in the motherhood community as a whole.
First, I think it's important to address that term "toxic positivity" that gets thrown around these days. Because while validation is so important, I personally feel we also have to eventually lift each other up as moms.
This is the type of mom friend you can expect me to be:
The one who validates your challenges and agrees wholeheartedly that this experience is HARD.
But then, I'm going to remind you how incredible you are, that you're doing an amazing job, and that we wouldn't trade this experience for the world.
No matter how much our children test us, we are so privileged to be here.
I also share very personal details about my own journey to motherhood and it uncovers some emotion I didn't plan on showing this episode! It's real and it's raw though, so I hope it hits home for you.
There were days I begged and prayed for this exhaustion in my life, as I know many of you did as well.
I am never going to sit here and tell you it's not hard. But what I will also remind you of every single day is that despite all of the challenges, it's still the best and most amazing privilege of our entire lives to raise these small humans.
I'm so proud of you for challenging your own perspective in the hard moments to remember this:
This exhaustion is a privilege, mama.

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1. Pilot Episode Aug 24, 2023

Show notes

Welcome to Moms Working Overtime! I'm so grateful that you're here.
Becoming a mom has made me super passionate about connecting with and helping other moms. This journey can truly feel like you're on an island sometimes, but my hope is that through this podcast I can remind you that you're never, ever alone in your motherhood journey.
My name is Alanna and I'm the mom behind the microphone. My husband, Dylan, and I are raising our family in our small hometown in southeast Missouri. It's been the biggest blessing to raise our child together, and our second one will be here soon! I believe our history of personal development and growth is what prepared us to have this beautiful perspective of parenthood, and we want to help you do the same. As with most things, when parenthood gets tough the mindset and perspective you have makes all the difference.
I aim to change the narrative in the mom community, especially when it comes to social media. Let's ditch the comparisons and find a middle ground - just some average moms trying to show up a little bit better for our family each and every day.
On this podcast, you can expect reassurance, validation, knowledge, and community...and so much more. I can't wait to bring you all together.
Last but not least, I want to share with you all what "Moms Working Overtime" even means. It has nothing to do with punching the clock, working outside the home, or climbing the corporate ladder. All of us, as moms, clock overtime hours every single day. It's the seemingly small things that we do to show up as our best selves and do the best we can for our families.
These things, while they feel futile, are actually the difference makers. And the return on investment is greater than we ever imagined.
I'm so glad you're here and we'll talk again soon!

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