Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott

Latest Episodes:

What Story Are You Telling Yourself? Writing Therapy with Stacy Brookman Ep. 101 Aug 04, 2020

Show notes

We’ve all heard that journaling can be therapeutic. But how does writing down our thoughts and feelings heal our emotional wounds? In this episode, we explore all this and more with Stacy Brookman of “Life Story Laboratory.” Stacy shares how writing helps us process our experiences, recover from trauma, and take back our power! Stacy explains how we can discover our life’s “theme” and reframe it if it’s not working for us. She encourages us to identify any lies we’re telling ourselves and replace them with the truth—that we’re strong, capable, and tenacious! According to psych research, writing fosters resilience and cultivates confidence. Join us to learn how to implement this powerful practice in your life!

Website: loveandlifemedia.com

Citations:

Take Charge of Your Thoughts, Take Charge of Your Life: Our 100th Episode! Ep. 100 Jul 27, 2020

Show notes

We’re celebrating Love & Life’s 100th episode! And, as a thank you to our Love & Life family, we’ve made this episode all about what you love most! We start by discussing the inspiration behind your three favorite Instagram posts—the mindset shifts that helped me remain hopeful and positive despite multiple heartbreaks over my MANY years of dating. We then break down a powerful approach from cognitive therapy to sustainably level up our emotional well being—even during the most painful and challenging times. I then answer 3 listeners’ questions and announce the Love & Life 100th Episode Celebration Giveaway! And the best part? Everyone’s a winner!

Website: loveandlifemedia.com

Otherhood: Single Women Without Kids (Who Want Them!) Ep. 99 Jul 24, 2020

Show notes

Sunday, July 26, 2020 is the 12th annual National Auntie’s Day—a day for celebrating the special bond between women and their nieces and nephews. It’s an opportunity to highlight the unique and important contribution aunts make to the development of the children in their lives. I’m an aunt and so are many of you, so I’m pleased to welcome the founder of Auntie’s Day and author of Otherhood: Modern Women Finding a New Kind of Happiness, Melanie Notkin, to the program! In our conversation, Melanie and I discuss:

· How women of The Otherhood manage their ongoing and currently unmet desire for marriage and family.

· The question almost every woman of The Otherhood has asked herself, “Should I settle for a ‘good enough’ guy in order to have children?”

· How to handle invasive and insensitive questions/comments about your life e.g. “You must have focused too much on your career!” or “Didn’t you want kids???”

· The prevailing, yet inaccurate, assumption that women of The Otherhood delayed marriage and child bearing.

· Grieving the loss of the life we’d expected, while embracing the joys of the life we have!

Aunties matter! And, despite the fact our lives haven’t played out as planned, we women of The Otherhood, can be assured our nurturing and influence make a profound, positive impact on the children we didn’t create, yet choose to love.

Q&A on Dating and Marital Conflict Ep. 98 Jul 14, 2020

Show notes

It’s time for another Love & Life Q&A! The first listener asks, “When the guy I’m seeing seems to ‘get quieter’ than he was before, should I pull back?” Another listener wonders, “Why would a man lie about his feelings?” And finally, we delve into the reality that there’s no such thing as a “conflict free” marriage. In fact, according to research by the Gottman Institute, 69% of problems in a relationship will not be solved. A listener asks me specifically, “How do you and your husband agree to disagree? How do you maintain a healthy relationship yet still disagree with each other?” Dan joins me to share how we’ve navigated conflict and challenges in our marriage.

Heartbreak is Hideous. Here’s Help! Ep. 97 Jul 07, 2020

Show notes

If you’ve been brokenhearted—and, most of us have—you know how excruciatingly painful it is. In fact, brain imaging shows us that the same neural systems involved in physical pain are involved in emotional pain i.e. the angst of a broken heart isn’t so dissimilar from the pain of a broken bone. And frankly, many of us would acknowledge that it feels way worse! So here’s some help for the broken-hearted! In this episode, I share the science of heartbreak—spoiler alert: neurologically speaking, you’re essentially addicted to your ex—along with three tangible strategies to help you move past the one who wasn’t right for you, so as to find the one who is!
Sources:
https://divorce.lovetoknow.com/Rates_of_Divorce_for_Adultery_and_Infidelity#:~:text=While%20adultery%20is%20no%20longer,20%2D40%20percent%20of%20divorces.
https://signalscv.com/2019/11/research-how-many-marriages-end-in-divorce-because-of-infidelity/#:~:text=40%25%20of%20adults%20who%20have,are%20currently%20separated%20or%20divorced.&text=In%20contrast%2C%20only%2017%25%20of,to%20no%20longer%20be%20together.&text=Roughly%2050%25%20of%20unfaithful%20partners%20are%20still%20married.
https://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/features/cfp-0000012.pdf

Can Love Survive Infidelity? Jennifer Lehr, LMFT Ep. 96 Jun 29, 2020

Show notes

What would you do if your partner strayed? Would you leave immediately or try to forgive the betrayal and move on? Could trust ever be rebuilt? Would the indiscretion haunt you forever? When vows have been broken, is a relationship ever salvageable? Marriage and family therapist, Jennifer Lehr, works with couples struggling to repair their relationships post infidelity. The good news—restoration is possible. The better news—it takes a lot of work. How is work BETTER news? Because, as Jennifer explains and the research substantiates, in-depth therapeutic work allows many couples to emerge from counseling stronger, more intimately connected, and happier in their marriages. Yes, infidelity can have a silver lining! Join us to learn:
· How to rebuild trust and intimacy after betrayal.
· Strategies for therapy when one partner wants to work on the relationship and the other doesn't.
· The Two-Person System model and why it’s important in relationships and marriage.
· Red flags and yellow flags to note when dating.
· How to educate yourself on what will destroy your relationship and how to prevent those behaviors/attitudes from taking over your relationship.
· The simple, but profound, recipe for a happy marriage.
· The most important element therapists provide their clients.
Jennifer shares wisdom and clinical examples from her 20 years of helping couples find hope and forgiveness, in order to forge a stronger, more intimate and satisfying relationship!

The Problem with Pain—Opioids, Big Pharma, and Heroin Addiction Ep. 95 Jun 23, 2020

Show notes

A few years ago, I met a young woman in her late twenties. As we began chatting, she shared she was going through a divorce. Her ex was addicted to OxyContin—a prescription pain medication. Fast forward a few years, and I learned some startling and terrifying facts—that in 2014, my home state of Ohio led the nation in deaths from heroin overdoses and in 2016, it earned this same distinction from opioid overdoses. I had no idea what was going on, but I suspected that diagnostic inflation and Big Pharma played a role. (For more on why I came to this conclusion, please listen to my interview with Dr. Allen Frances in episode 22). So, when I came across Sam Quinones’ book, Dreamland: The True Tale of America's Opiate Epidemic, I knew I wanted to invite him to the program to help us understand how the Heartland became America’s hotspot of heroin and opioid addiction. In our conversation, Sam describes:
· The “perfect storm” that moved heroin from the fringe to the suburbs.
· How a letter to the New England Journal of Medicine morphed into a “landmark study” which changed the way medical professionals viewed opioids, addiction, and pain management.
· The connection between prescription pads and black tar heroin.
· How the fraying social fabric and breakdown of communities relate to the rise in drug addiction.
· The striking similarities in the marketing strategies of Big Pharma and black tar heroin drug traffickers.
Join us as author Sam Quinones explains this tragic rise of prescription opioid abuse and heroin addiction. If you’re like me, you’ve wondered how this happened—Sam provides answers and solutions.

Dating, Marriage, and Feminism with Life Coach Laurie Gerber Ep. 94 Jun 16, 2020

Show notes

One topic I haven’t covered extensively is sex. So, when life coach Laurie Gerber reached out requesting to appear on the show to share her slightly controversial philosophy about sex, I figured it was high time we delve into this important element of love and life! Laurie specializes in marriage and relationship coaching and has appeared on Dr. Phil, Dr. Oz, and the TODAY show. Join us to learn:
· Her philosophy on sex which rekindled the spark in her 20+ year marriage.
· How Laurie’s feminist ideology impacted her sex life.
· The mantras that eroded the romance in her marriage.
· Lies we tell ourselves which impede our goals and dreams.
· Questions to ask yourself when you’re dating with purpose.
· The critical difference between dating expectations and standards.
No matter what your relationship status—single, dating exclusively, or married—Laurie’s candid account and wise counsel will inform and inspire you!
Laurie's special offer for Love & Life listeners:
Get Started with your LOVE&LIFE75 coupon at: https://bit.ly/0520LL-iu

Recovering from Narcissistic Abuse with Dr. Annie Kaszina Ep. 93 Jun 09, 2020

Show notes

I get a LOT of questions about how to recover from a relationship with a narcissist. So this topic is one I’ve wanted to address for quite a while. I’m so pleased to welcome psychologist Dr. Annie Kaszina to the program to share not only her professional expertise, but also her personal journey of marrying and then divorcing a narcissist. Dr. Kaszina delves into:
· How strong, independent, accomplished women fall in love with and stay with narcs.
· The red flags narcissists wave—despite their best efforts to dupe you!
· Dr. Annie’s suggestion for discovering if the person you’re dating has narcissistic tendencies.
· Why pacing yourself in the early days of a relationship is imperative!
· The power of self-knowledge as it relates to narcs.
· How to take back control after being with a narcissist.
· Co-parenting when your ex is a narcissist.
· The identity some women take on when they’ve been with a narc.
In this episode, as in her book, Do You Choose Your Dog More Carefully Than Your Husband? Dr. Kaszina assures us that we CAN rebuild our lives in the aftermath of narcissistic abuse and we CAN move forward empowered, emboldened, and equipped to select a husband as carefully as we’d pick a pup!
Get a free chapter of Dr. Annie’s book here: https://recoverfromemotionalabuse.com/lp-dog

The Science of Dating: Love Factually with Dr. Duana Welch Ep. 92 Jun 02, 2020

Show notes

Wouldn’t it be great if science could give us the straight facts on dating? Well actually, it does! When on the dating scene herself, psychologist Dr. Duana Welch, looked to psych research for guidance. She shares all she learned in her blog, Love Science, and in her Love Factually book series. Join us as we discuss:
· Why men get so excited early in a relationship, but often lose interest just as quickly.
· The different ways men and women experience situationships.
· How sex causes you to bond—even when it’s just friends with benefits.
· How to figure out if you’re too picky!
· A powerful strategy if you’ve lost hope in love.
· Why women love a man with a plan (and what this means for us when dating!)
· What happens when men lose interest—spoiler alert, even they don’t know why!
· How to present yourself as a “high status” woman—and why this is imperative when dating (also, it’s NOT about being arrogant or snooty!)
· The different “mating psychology” of men vs. women.
· The brain chemistry of a man as he’s falling in love.
Learn how to “love smarter, not harder” by loving FACTUALLY!

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