How To Survive with Danielle & Kristine

Latest Episodes:

How To Survive a Space Mission & a Madonna Audition (w/Dennis Hensley) Nov 04, 2025

Show notes

This week on How to Survive, Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive traveling to space — zero gravity, cosmic rays, and all! Writer/Professional Dancer Dennis Hensley joins the fun to share his hilarious story about auditioning to be a backup dancer for Madonna.

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🎧 New episodes every week!

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See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How to Survive Identity Theft & an Art Heist (w/ Murray Valeriano) Oct 28, 2025

Show notes

This week, How to Survive tackles identity theft and didgeridoo drama! Comedian Murray Valeriano returns with a hilarious tale of trying to reclaim his cousin’s missing didgeridoos from a Hollywood Hills art dealer.

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🎧 New episodes every week!

👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content.

📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How to Survive Urban Legends & Real-Life Body Horror (w/ Kevin Avery) Oct 21, 2025

Show notes

This week, on How to Survive, Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive urban legends — from Cropsey to Candyman — and comedian Kevin Avery joins to share his own real-life medical scare involving a benign tumor. It’s a mix of monsters, medicine, and mayhem — only on How to Survive!

👉 Hit Follow — it helps the show and keeps you alive!

🎧 New episodes every week!

👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content.

📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How To Survive Burning Mouth Syndrome and an NYC Meltdown (w/ Dan Cronin) Oct 14, 2025

Show notes

This week on How to Survive, Danielle and Kristine tackle Burning Mouth Syndrome (yep, it’s real!) and welcome comedian Dan Cronin, who survived his own burning experience in New York City- one that nearly took out his apartment. Get more chaos and laughter on Patreon!

🎧 New episodes every week!

👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content.

📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How To Survive Salmonella (w/Mike Henry) Oct 07, 2025

Show notes

Salmonella strikes again! On this week's episode of How to Survive, returning guest Mike Henry shares his unforgettable encounter with the bacteria.

👉 Hit Follow — it helps the show and keeps you alive!

🎧 New episodes every week!

👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content.

📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How to Survive Wedding Disasters (w/ Marta Mendez-Cross) Sep 30, 2025

Show notes

This week on How to Survive, Danielle and Kristine tackle runaway grooms (and brides!) and get the inside scoop on international “I dos” with Las Tres Sisters Marta Mendez-Cross, who shares her wild wedding adventures in Costa Rica.

👉 Hit Follow — it helps the show and keeps you alive!

🎧 New episodes every week!

👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content.

📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How To Survive A Strip Search (w/Kathy Egan-Taylor) Sep 23, 2025

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This week, on How to Survive, Danielle & Kristine undress the topic of the strip search. We’re talking strip searches, survival tips, and the fine line between law enforcement and a lawsuit. Kathy Egan-Taylor of Bad Elizabeth shares her unforgettable experience with the UK Border Patrol.

👉 Hit Follow — it helps the show and keeps you alive!

🎧 New episodes every week!

👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content.

📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How To Survive Performance Anxiety & Cruise Ship Gigs (w/Chris Witaske) Sep 16, 2025

Show notes

This week on How to Survive with Danielle & Kristine, we face the spotlight: performance anxiety (something many comedians struggle with) and the fascinating world of cruise ship comedy 🚢. Actor and comedian Chris Witaske (The Bear, Chicago Party Aunt) joins us to share hilarious survival stories, from performing for an audience trapped at sea to being a magician's assistant. Plus, he shares a harrowing and mysterious cruise ship death.

👉 Hit Follow — it helps the show and keeps you alive!

🎧 New episodes every week!

👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content.

📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How to Survive Sea Slugs & Skydiving (Comedy w/ Nikki Nash) Sep 09, 2025

Show notes

This week on How to Survive with Danielle & Kristine, we dive into two wild adventures: the beautiful (but venomous) Blue Dragon sea slugs 🐉🌊 and the thrill of skydiving! Writer Nikki Nash joins us to share hilarious stories from her book Collateral Stardust and what it really takes to survive falling from the sky.

🎧 Want more laughs? Get extended episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes fun on Patreon.

📰 Stay in the loop! Join our Substack for extra comedy, more survival tips, and stuff we don’t share anywhere else.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

How to Survive Martial Law… and Martial Arts? (w/ Cristina Fernandez) Sep 02, 2025

Show notes

This week on 'How to Survive with Danielle & Kristine,' we tackle two wild challenges: how to survive under martial law (unthinkable, but we promise to make you laugh) and what happens when you step onto the mat for Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Comedian Cristina Fernandez joins us with laugh-out-loud stories, survival “tips,” and a few chokeholds along the way.

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🎧 Get More Laughs on Patreon

Love the show? Support us on Patreon for extended episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes survival stories you won’t hear anywhere else.

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See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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