Goofy C*nt Nation

Latest Episodes:

129 Ways to Get a Husband & 0 Second Dates Oct 06, 2021

Show notes

Hanna bitches to Skylar about unsolicited advice from friends in relationships and gets pretty defensive about it. The girls also read a magazine article from 1958 of "129 ways to get a husband" that wouldn't work today, or likely ever. Also, enough with the herpes jokes and calling smoothies "lunch"

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No Longer Aspiring Sep 29, 2021

Show notes

Hanna and Skylar chit-chat sobriety in a crew of drunk girls and the best way to reveal an STD (pamphlets, powerpoint, etc). They also discuss a mother/ daughter duo that murdered a woman via butt implants. side note: why do people get filler? Hanna reveals her hatred for Haunted Houses and unending chitchat loops on dating apps (which are their own haunted house).

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Everyone has Red Flags Sep 22, 2021

Show notes

Hanna and Skylar talk about the Amazon Prime doc 'LulaRich' and the power of ugly leggings, how to spot red flags before things go wrong (trick question, you can't), and the unsolved case of Gabby Petito. The girlies also can't help but wonder, are all men sociopaths? Kidding, women can be too, i.e Erika Jayne.

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Ghosted but Still Gettin' It Sep 15, 2021

Show notes

Hanna dishes to Skylar about getting close to celebs and realizing she's too old for this new generation of fame. The gal pals also discuss Kourtney and Megan Fox's unnecessary acting careers turned rockstars' baby mamas, personal assistant horror stories (Hanna once accidentally ate her boss' pubes but it wasn't sexual), and the confusing MET Gala looks (social messaging).

Hanna also bitches about Bumbles notification of guys who "are no longer feeling it" and getting shot down in the DM's.

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Jockstrap at Graduation with Chad Kroeger (Chad Goes Deep) Sep 08, 2021

Show notes

Hanna and Skylar reconnect after Skylar gets engaged in Spain & the girlies gossip about proposals, Hanna's new puppy, the Scott v Kravis drama. When will men date their own age/ when will Hanna get over any of her exes?

Hanna then introduces the legend Chad Kroeger to the hammer toe. The 2 chit chat about red flags on dating apps, having babies, and one swollen nut.

Fetish of the week: Mysophilia

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Never Trust the Bus with Natasha Vaynblat Sep 01, 2021

Show notes

Hanna and comedian/ guest host Kat Belinfante discuss dropping too many thirst traps, their fear of dying alone, and the humiliation of having a crush.

The girlies are then joined by comedian Natasha Vaynblat to talk about her war with Coach USA, their theory of KRAVIS, who men follow on Instagram and what is says about them.

Sex position of the week: 'BUTTER CHURNER', heard of it??? Kat and Natasha certainly have it.

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Shitting Dildos with Nicole Aimee Schreiber Aug 25, 2021

Show notes

Hanna and Skylar discuss to stay sober and celibate at a wedding. Hanna then vents to Skylar about the sacrifices she's had to make with sobriety such as threesomes and general thoughtlessness. The gal pals answers one listener who asks how to tell a new partner they have herpes.

The girlies are then joined by comedian Nicole Aimee Schreiber and talk about the time Nicole lost a dildo to the vortex that is her asshole, the low standards we have for men, delusional confidence and lippy pussies.

Fetish of the week: psellismophilia

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Freezing Eggs and Shaving Nipples with Maddy Smith Aug 11, 2021

Show notes

Hanna recaps the Kanye listening party for Skylar as they try to dissect the meaning of his madness (or genius?) The girlies also shit on AirBnb and reminisce on the good old days of middle management. Should Hanna and Skylar start an OnlyFans? Be honest. Than these inspiring babes talk to comedian Maddy Smith about bombing (but not actually bombing) at a recording, losing weight after gaining the Freshman 15 of Life, the price of showing our titties and having body hair.

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BJ Bumpers with Courtney Davis Aug 04, 2021

Show notes

Skylar and Hanna discuss the new Gucci movie & whether or not Lady Gaga is a good actress. They also chit chat about Adam Driver's sexual experience with a horse in a cologne ad. The girlies are then joined by comedian Courtney Davis to talk about flying coach to Tokyo for a man, working as Jared Kushner's assistant and having sex on a haystack.

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Fourth Time's a Charm with Jeff Epstein Jul 28, 2021

Show notes

Hanna and Skylar gab about responding to weak dating profiles, a porno breakup and the power of Bennifer (desperation). Hanna then gossips with comedian Jeff Epstein about rehab roommates, trying to stay hot in recovery and Jeff's recent diagnosis (per Dr. Dickinson's suspicions).

Fetish of the week: Chremastistophilia

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