Fragmented to Whole: Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery

Choosing Freedom: How a Simple Shift in Language Can Change Your Life | Episode 249 Jan 29, 2024

Show notes

Whenever I hear clients say something along the lines of “I have to…” I like to reframe their sentence to instead say, ‘I get to…” or “I could do…”. The language change is so small, and yet the conceptual change is HUGE. This week’s episode 249 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about choosing freedom: how a simple shift in language can change your life!

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In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m talking about how building healthy boundaries helped me to understand that I have choices in everything that I do and sharing some examples of how a simple shift in your language can reframe your entire perspective of your life.

The biggest way to stop thinking that you don’t have choices in your life is to stop using phrases like ‘I have to’ or ‘I need to’ and start using the phrase, ‘I GET to’. You’ll be amazed at how freeing those little vocabulary changes are.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

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How I Heal My Inner Teenager: Unveiling the Magic of Reparenting | Episode 248 Jan 22, 2024

Show notes

ep 212. Nine New Methods I've Learned for Reparenting and How They've Affected Me

The reparenting journey that I’ve been on for the last year has been nothing short of miraculous. I cannot tell you the level of healing I’ve achieved through my reparenting work. I hope that by sharing my journey and process on the podcast, other people can also find some healing. This week’s episode 248 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how I heal my inner teenager: unveiling the magic of reparenting!

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Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:

Recent examples in the past week where I have recognized how far I have come in my reparenting journey.
How the feelings from my inner child and inner teenager come out in my life.
Using my inner loving family to reparent my younger self when big feelings and emotions arise.
The nicknames, habits, and general knowledge that come forward in my reparenting sessions.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

ep. 114. Here’s What Recovery Looks Like in Real Life - My Day at the Beach

ep 181. 5 Methods for Reparenting Myself: What That Looks Like for Me

ep. 218. My Vulnerable Share about Family Dysfunction and How It Results In Trauma

ep. 221. The Evolution of My Reparenting Journey: Reshaping the Past to Heal the Future - Part 1

ep. 222. The Evolution of My Reparenting Journey: Reshaping the Past to Heal the Future - Part 2

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11 Steps for How to Build Your Own Personalized Boundary System Part 2 | Episode 247 Jan 15, 2024

Show notes

Last week, I shared the first half of the steps I take all of my boundary clients through to build their personalized boundary system. Today, I’ll be sharing the final half of the steps so that you can create a boundary system that works for you! This week’s episode 247 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is part 2 of the steps to build your own personalized boundary system!

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If you missed part 1 of these steps, refer back to episode 246 where I cover steps 1-5.

The steps I go over in this episode include:

6. Learn how to let good things in as well as keep bad things out.

7. Set boundaries of self-protection.

8. Set boundaries of self-containment.

9. Hold onto your property. You’re the one responsible for it.

10. Align with your values.

11. Stay connected to healthy, safe, and loving people as you build healthy boundaries.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Ep 9. My Tools of Recovery Part II: Reaching Out

Ep. 12. Stop Gossiping

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11 Steps for How to Build Your Own Personalized Boundary System Part 1 | Episode 246 Jan 08, 2024

Show notes

I take all of my boundaries clients through a series of steps to build their personalized boundary system and I wanted to share these steps with you today. This week’s episode 246 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is part 1 of the steps to build your own personalized boundary system!

Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!

In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the importance of determining your top 5 values BEFORE starting any boundary work and actionable steps you can take right now to create a boundary setting system that feels good to you!

The steps I go over in this episode include:

Alter your mindset.
Develop empowered communication.
Shed your masks.
Deal with the pushback that inevitably comes.
Recognize who owns what.

Tune into next week’s episode as I cover steps 6-11.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Ep 156. Info, Not Ammo

Ep. 9. My Tools of Recovery Part II: Reaching Out

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How to Stop the Self-Sabotage and Get Over Your Fear of Abandonment | Episode 245 Jan 01, 2024

Show notes

Sometimes people refer to self-sabotage as things like shooting themselves in the foot, not showing up for themselves, or not following through for themselves. This is incredibly common for those of us in recovery. ACA has taught me that another way to refer to self-sabotage is to call it self-abandonment. And this makes sense because as adult children, we were brought up on abandonment so of course we would only learn to abandon ourselves. This week’s episode 245 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how to stop the self-sabotage and get over your fear of abandonment.

Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!

Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:

Why it is so common for adult children of alcoholics and dysfunctional families to self-sabotage or self-abandon themselves.
Some of the ways we might abandon ourselves.
2 important reasons it is helpful to connect this abandonment behavior to our status as adult children.

When you start calling self-sabotage, self-abandonment there is s solution to that. And that solution is becoming your own inner-loving parent.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

The ACA Solution

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How to Effectively Communicate When Someone Says, ‘You Don’t Care About Me’ | Episode 244 Dec 25, 2023

Show notes

When someone says something like ‘You don’t care about me’ to you and you defend it, you’re the one declaring war against them. How you respond in these scenarios determines whether you’re entering into a conflict or a conversation. This week’s episode 244 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how to effectively communicate when someone says, ‘you don’t care about me’.

Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!

In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing what to do to show someone you care about them and get to the root of the problem instead of getting defensive and listing the reasons you DO care about them. I also share the specific language you can use to communicate effectively in any scenario.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

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How I Went from Trauma Response to Miraculous Recovery- A Story of Driving and Toenails | Episode 243 Dec 18, 2023

Show notes

A couple of instances have come up in my life recently where I realized how far I have come since recovery. Scenarios that used to trigger an emotional trauma response are replaced with clarity and calmness. And in times like this, I become super appreciative of my recovery. This week’s episode 243 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how I went from trauma response to miraculous recovery- a story of driving and toenails.

Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!

In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing experiences in my life that triggered a dramatic trauma response before getting into recovery and how recovery has allowed me to change physiologically to live a more peaceful life.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families 12 Step Recovery Fellowship (aka ACA or ACOA)

Episode 17: GUILT AND SHAME

Episode 179: Freedom from the Lie of Shame - You're Not Inherently Flawed

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How to Stop Trusting Untrustworthy People and Start Trusting Yourself | Episode 242 Dec 11, 2023

Show notes

One of the many revelations I had while in recovery is that I had been trusting untrustworthy people my entire life. These people had proven to me time and time again that they were not to be trusted and when they broke my trust I would inevitably get upset over it. When I eventually learned to find my part in things, I realized I was the one at fault- for continuing to trust untrustworthy people! This week’s episode 242 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how to stop trusting untrustworthy people and start trusting yourself!

Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!

In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing examples from my life where I got burned for continuing to trust people who had already shown me that they were untrustworthy and how building self-trust was the foundation that helped me come out of this harmful behavior pattern. I also share the amazing benefits that self-trust has given me.

Trust is something that can only be built over time. We can only determine if someone is trustworthy by seeing their continued patterns of behavior.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

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3 Conceptual Shifts Learned in Recovery and How They'll Change Your Life | Episode 241 Dec 04, 2023

Show notes

It’s occurred to me recently that a huge part of 12-step recovery is changing our perceptions or the ways in which we perceive certain concepts. And when we can make these mental shifts, the way we view our circumstances or situations we find ourselves in changes drastically. This week’s episode 241 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about 3 conceptual shifts learned in recovery and how they’ll change your life!

Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!

In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing 3 (of the many) shifts that have come up for me personally, with a client or with someone in recovery, and sharing how these shifts might come up in your life and what to do about them when they do.

The 3 conceptual shifts I go over in this episode include:

Making the distinction between submitting to something and surrendering to something.
Understanding that something may be reasonable and at the same time, unrealistic.
Drawing the line between acceptance and setting boundaries.

Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.

Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/

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