DadAwesome

Latest Episodes:

168 | Dads of Influence vs. Control (Dr. Peter Larson) Apr 08, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Dr. Peter Larson

Peter J. Larson, Ph.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist, published author, and leader in assessment development. He is the former President of Life Innovations and the co-developer of several internationally used assessment tools, including PREPARE/ENRICH, MCODE, and TruMotivate. He is also an experienced couples therapist and the former Director of Research and Clinical Services for the Smalley Relationship Center.

Peter has been married to Heather Larson for 25 years and has three children ages 17, 18 and 20. Peter and Heather regularly teach, write, and coach premarital couples together.

FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS

Registration is NOW OPEN for the FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS 100-mile bike rides.

—MINNEAPOLIS, MN — August 28th, 2021

— DENVER, CO — September 18th, 2021

— PHILADELPHIA, PA — October 2nd, 2021

— NEW YORK, NY — October 9th, 2021

— PHOENIX, AZ — November 20th, 2021

Show Notes:

4:42 - Tips for dads taking their 11 to 13 yr old son or daughter on an intentional trip:
5:57 - "A big topic of the conversation is how do you show up, and not be conformed to just what everyone else is thinking and doing?"
6:11 - How do you prepare your younger child to WANT to go on a trip when they are 13?
10:48 - "You can't just start strong or launch them. Well, you gotta finish strong too. And because that does impact you. And that's like probably one of the few pain points, when I think about my dad - like, man, he was such a rockstar. I wish he would have finished a little stronger in terms of his, just his modeling of lifestyle."
14:33 - Peter's take on cheering on his athletic son - "There's being proud of your kid, and then there's being like letting your own identity creep into it.....So, you know, keeping your priorities in check, and making sure that's not the only focus of life. You know, life's a whole lot more, especially than something like that."
16:12 - Prepare Enrich [https://www.prepare-enrich.com/] - marriage and premarital assessments for couples.
17:00 - Gloo [https://www.gloo.us/] - assessments and developing tools to serve churches
19:34 - On encouraging strengths in our kids: "...Starting to pay attention to what is it that they naturally do and that they love, and realizing there's some motivation there that is going to serve them throughout their life. And how do we unleash that - fan those flames. And what's fun is it's going to be different than you, you know, they're their own unique person."
19:52 - True Motivate tool [https://trumotivate.com/]
23:02 - "You can't make them do anything they don't want to do. And now on the flip side.... actually you do have influence though. And influence is wonderful because it's like a continuum. And so your question, your challenge as a dad, as a parent, is to think about how can I maximize my influence while knowing I don't have control."
24:22 - How do you influence your kids? 5 ways...
25:21 - (1) Light up when your kid walks in the room.
27:30 - "[My kids are] copying the things I do, even when they don't make sense, you know, when they're irrational."
29:57 - Why to make date nights a priority and what that models for our kids.
31:21 - (2) Setting up routines as a family
32:18 - (3) Making church a priority
33:55 - (4) The importance of outsourcing influence to other positive influences and letting go of control.
36:47 - (5) Don't get on the roller coaster of emotion with our kids
39:54 - "Great parents are often very willing to share a little bit of gold. And so don't hesitate to look for those moments where you can glean a little of that and mine some gold, because those things have informed our last 20 years of parenting and has been awesome."

Episode Links:

www.gloo.us
www.prepare-enrich.com
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team

Full Transcript:

https://dadawesome.org/168notes/ ‎

167 | David Horsager on Trusted Leadership for Dads Apr 01, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

David Horsager

David Horsager is the CEO of Trust Edge Leadership Institute, national bestselling author of The Trust Edge and The Daily Edge, inventor of the Enterprise Trust Index™, and director of one of the nation's foremost trust studies: The Trust Outlook™.

His work has been featured in prominent publications such as Fast Company, Forbes, The Huffington Post and The Wall Street Journal. David has delivered life-changing presentations on six continents, with audiences ranging everywhere from FedEx, Toyota and global governments to the New York Yankees and the Department of Homeland Security.

Get free resources and more at www.DavidHorsager.com, www.TrustEdge.com, and www.TrustEdgeCoaching.com

FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS

Registration is NOW OPEN for the FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS 100-mile bike rides.

—MINNEAPOLIS, MN — August 28th, 2021

— DENVER, CO — September 18th, 2021

— PHILADELPHIA, PA — October 2nd, 2021

— NEW YORK, NY — October 9th, 2021

— PHOENIX, AZ — November 20th, 2021

Show Notes:

1:53 - LINK TO DAVID's 1st time on dadAWESOME - https://dadawesome.org/138/
3:55 - Praxis Labs Resources https://www.praxislabs.org/
4:45 - New insights as a dad
5:17 - "See the good, say the good, share the good."
9:24 - David's 2020 reflection video - "15 Things I Learned In 2020 That I Can Use Forever" -
10:01 - "Reflection allows space for God to speak to us."
12:01 - Rhythms of rest and pause
13:41 - Pacem in Terris - Hermitage retreat center
17:33 - SEEDS - Sleep, Exercise, Eat right, Drink water, Source of strength
20:24 - "People that are leading well, actually have a source of strength beyond themselves. And they're better at work. If people are getting all their life from work, they're worse at work."
21:16 - "Inputs, always lead to outputs"
22:13 - Phil 4:8 - Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, whatever is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things.'
24:28 - The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson
26:06 - Discussing inputs as a dad that lead to great outputs
26:07 - "Quantity time builds quality time."
28:08 - Pathway to Purity
31:04 - David's new book: The Trusted Leader
33:22 - Trust Edge - David's bestselling book.
34:32 - Faith-based module about what God's saying about trust. - Email the team for this resource. Anne (at) trustedge (dot) com
34:58 - Trustedleaderbook.com/dadAWESOME
35:41 - How dads can be difference makers.
36:09 - Making a list of 5 DMA's (difference-making actions) for each day. Ask: What are the difference-making actions today to drive our mission, to do what we're supposed to be called to do today? What are the most important things?
37:52 - One thing that consistently comes to mind is consistency, which is the final pillar of the Trust Edge Framework. And...as a dad or a leader, little things done consistently make the biggest difference, not the big things you thought... Little things done consistently make the biggest difference.

Episode Links:

David's new book: The Trusted Leader
www.DavidHorsager.com
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team

Full Transcript:

https://dadawesome.org/167notes/

166 | Embrace The Pain & Find Strength Through Brotherhood (Rob Champion) Mar 25, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Rob Champion

Rob Champion is the campus pastor at People's Church in Oklahoma City, OK. He's been married for 25 years to his wife Nickie and they have a 20-yr old daughter and 18 yr-old son.

FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS

Registration is NOW OPEN for the FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS 100-mile bike rides.

—MINNEAPOLIS, MN — August 28th, 2021

— DENVER, CO — September 18th, 2021

— PHILADELPHIA, PA — October 2nd, 2021

— NEW YORK, NY — October 9th, 2021

— PHOENIX, AZ — November 20th, 2021

Show Notes:

3:20 - Describing the transition from younger years to high school "coaching mode" and friendship beyond.
5:32 - Coaching out of relationship
7:42 - What he saw from his dad - what areas he admired, and what he chose to do differently in his family.
12:42 - Thoughts on brotherhood - Quote from Ecclesiastes - "One can be defeated, but two can stand back to back and conquer, and the triple braided cord is not easily broken."
15:26 - Killing Kryptonite by John Bevere
18:22 - Weakness as a dad - struggling with anger.
20:53 - How he recognized the need for a change. Recommended book: Leadership Pain
22:48 - "I've learned that in our journey, don't be afraid of the pain, the pain that you experience is God's trying to show you and grow you through your pain. So embrace it and be willing to go on the journey. God will lead you."
23:49 - "Anything you're not liking in how you're behaving is tied to a root in your life that God is trying to uproot."
24:42 - "Guard your heart for out of it flows the wellspring of life, everything comes out of it."
27:28 - Rob's Brotherhood Groups https://www.facebook.com/groups/menszoomgroup/
30:45 - Practical mentoring tips: "Seek first to understand your kid, seek first to understand your wife, seek first to understand anyone..."
34:01 - "And just because you may not have the skills that another brother may have or, the abilities that someone else may have, understand that you, your value is not based off of what you do. It's based off of whose you are, you belong to the Father and your value is rooted in that. Stand confident in that understand you have something to offer your kids. You have something to offer your spouse. You have something to offer your church. You have something to offer this world and walk in your gifts and let other people do the things that you're not so gifted in and celebrate them in it as well."

Episode Links:

Pastor Rob's Brotherhood Zoom Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/menszoomgroup/
People's Church https://peoples.church/
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team

Full Transcript:

https://dadawesome.org/166notes/

165 | Men of the Kingdom (Dean Stinchfield PART 2) Mar 18, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Dean Stinchfield

Dean and his wife Lisa have 2 daughters and a son-in-law and they live in the west metro of the Twin Cities. He leads the ministry Men of The Kingdom and his personal mission is to glorify God by participating in the advancement of his Kingdom by equipping and encouraging the next generation of moral leaders in the church.

(Matthew 6:33, 1 Corinthians 10:31, 2 Timothy 2:2, 1 Peter 5:2-4, Matthew 28:19-20, Hebrews 10:24-25)

FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS

Registration is NOW OPEN for the FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS 100-mile bike rides.

—MINNEAPOLIS, MN — August 28th, 2021

— DENVER, CO — September 18th, 2021

— PHILADELPHIA, PA — October 2nd, 2021

— NEW YORK, NY — October 9th, 2021

— PHOENIX, AZ — November 20th, 2021

Show Notes:

PART 1 of this Dean Stinchfield conversation: https://dadawesome.org/164/

1:42 - Men of the Kingdom https://www.menofthekingdom.com/
2:08 - Chuck Colson Centurion program https://www.breakpoint.org/join-the-centurions/
2:37 - Being told by Chuck Colson, "If you don't think you're doing something for the Lord right now, you're missing it. As a Christian there's no such thing as retirement. There's just repurposement."
3:54 - "The biblical model of the church is everybody has been given a gift by the Holy spirit and that gift isn't to edify them, it's to serve the church and equip and encourage other people."
4:33 - Describing Men of the Kingdom - how he determined "the great work" he is meant to do in life.
6:29 - GUIDE FOR HELPING DADS FIND PERSONAL MISSION STATEMENT https://www.menofthekingdom.com/resources-curriculum/
7:03 - A personal mission statement answers the questions - What are the unique gifts that you've been given? What are the burdens on your heart? Where do we feel completely alive?
7:28 - Three eternal questions: Who's your audience? What timeframe are you living your life? What treasures are you going after?
8:52 - Reading the Beatitudes with a Dad filter (Matt 5:3-12)
16:05 - Being asked to play a dad role for his friend who passed away tragically
18:46 - Living from the personal mission statement
21:28 - Final thoughts from Dean: Have courage. Pray dangerous prayers. What kind of mission do I have for my life? Take risks. Fail often and early. Don't be a critic. Be an encourager.
23:28 - Man in the Arena - "It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat." Theodore Roosevelt

Conversation Links:

164 | Be the "Dad in the Arena"(Dean Stinchfield PART 1) Mar 11, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Dean Stinchfield

(Matthew 6:33, 1 Corinthians 10:31, 2 Timothy 2:2, 1 Peter 5:2-4, Matthew 28:19-20, Hebrews 10:24-25)

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat." Theodore Roosevelt

FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS

Registration is NOW OPEN for the FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS 100-mile bike rides.

—MINNEAPOLIS, MN — August 28th, 2021

— DENVER, CO — September 18th, 2021

— PHILADELPHIA, PA — October 2nd, 2021

— NEW YORK, NY — October 9th, 2021

— PHOENIX, AZ — November 20th, 2021

Show Notes:

3:20 - Quote from Edmund Burke, "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."
4:47 - In response to this quote from Edmund Burke - pressing into the ownership of the space God has put in front of us. "This is my space and God's given us a space to....we got to have ownership of that and step forward. And we have kingdom power, so we should be stepping forward and utilizing that kingdom power."
5:04 - "The man in the arena" - speech by Teddy Roosevelt - every dad is a man in the arena.
5:42 - Beliefs passed down from his parents - that the future is good and we have a good Heavenly Father. Drawing out the best in him and projecting that into the future.
6:33 - "That which we focus on tends to multiply....find the best parts of your spouse or the best parts of your kid and focus on those because they'll tend to expand. Either in your vision but also in your life."
8:18 - Sharing with his girls: "I will always love you. I will always be your dad. Jesus will always love you. We will always be friends."
10:08 - The emotional bank account - word bank account inside our kids. Affirmations are deposits and criticism is a withdrawal.
11:46 - Why repetition is important when it comes to speaking life.
12:26 - Setting up a foundation to be able to recognize when a relationship is right, this is what it feels like.
14:02 - Sharing a not-so-awesome dad moment.
15:12 - The best thing I can do for my girls is to love my wife and respect my wife and honor her, no matter what our relationship is doing, I'm called to sacrifice and love my wife, period.
15:08- Speck management vs Log work - focusing on the small flaws or failures of other people, focus on yourself.
22:10 - "CS Lewis talked about the God-like patchwork. He said, the revealed word is like, we're walking in this dense wooded forest. And every once in a while, the sunlight breaks through the canopy. And I think God's word is like that."
24:34 - On why the local church is so important. "AW Tozer talks about in The Pursuit of God , that we should have an authentic relationship based on an experience, not hearsay, with God the Father, God the son and God the Holy spirit. And the local church gives us a chance to do that."
25:33 - Why he volunteered in the kids ministry.

Conversation Links:

Full Transcript:

https://dadawesome.org/164notes/

163 | An Announcement, Four dadNOTES & a Book Blitz Mar 04, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS 2021 Announcement:

Registration is NOW OPEN for the FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS 100-mile bike rides.

Click HERE TO SIGN UP for one of these cities:

--MINNEAPOLIS, MN -- August 28th, 2021

-- DENVER, CO -- September 18th, 2021

-- PHILADELPHIA, PA -- October 2nd, 2021

-- NEW YORK, NY -- October 9th, 2021

-- PHOENIX, AZ -- November 20th, 2021

Goal - To raise $1,000,000 for the fatherless.

Four dadNOTES from the first Two Months of 2021:

2:24 - Are we ready emotionally to handle the journey that our kids are on? We need to bring our emotional strength to their situation.
2:32 - Episode 156 - Pastor Peter Haas (Part - 2 of 3) "I've noticed that my kids don't need me to have all the answers, but they do need me to be emotionally capable of helping them find God in the midst of that. And, I've noticed that the greatest disciplers aren't the ones with all the Bible answers. They're the ones that are just willing to be present and go on a journey with you."
3:26 - Are we opening doors, are we hosting an attach on the hearts of our kids?
3:33 - Episode 159 | Zach Neese - Story of Lot and Sodom and Gomorrah. "One of the ways that Lot, a righteous man, one of the ways he failed was in guarding the gateways of his kids' hearts from the culture that they had moved into. The culture influenced them, they didn't influence the culture....we have more access points in our lives today than at any other point in history and we have less training in how to guard those access points than in any other time in history."
5:33 - Episode 161 - Efrem Smith - "Now my dad and I talk and we can't have a phone conversation without my dad saying, 'I love you. I'm proud of you. I love you'….and even at 52 years old, hearing my 77 year old dad say that to me even now is so empowering [and] so transformative. And so, I think for me, one thing I would say is dads need to not be afraid, not be hesitant in a healthy way of being vulnerable in front of your kids, because what that shows is that you're not stronger than the creator of the universe...we do a disservice to our kids if we lead them to believe that we can live well without God."
7:21 - Episode 160 - Phil Comer - The concept of "the box" from the book Raising Passionate Jesus Followers [NEED LINK] – Jesus is the foundation, then there is discipline, encouragement, the rod of correction, order. The top is affection, affirmation and fun.

Book Blitz: (9 books)

9:55 - Pursuit: 21-Day Prayer and Fasting Devotional - Practical takeaways for why fasting is a game-changer.
10:22 - Bible Recap by Tara-Leigh Cobble. - Daily Bible reading plan - an app and a book.
11:08 - Man Maker Project: Boys are Born. Men are Made. (Chris Bruno) - Unpacking the fatherlessness epidemic - Malachi verse - hearts of kids returning to fathers. "God's final warning is serious and dire. In essence the welfare of society rests on intentional fathers. Father well, God says, and the world will be blessed. Father poorly, and the world crumbles. It's really that big."
12:03 - Win the Day by Mark Batterson - daily rhythms for winning the day. Sponsored book for the F4F tour - free for every person who registers for the ride.
12:40 - Essentialism by Greg McKeown - What is the priority and how do we narrow our focus?
13:20 - Play the Man: Becoming the Man God Created You to Be by Mark Batterson - A template for dads and sons for how to "play the man" and "be the man." Quote from the book, "My father had, to a marvelous degree, the gift of opening doors for his children, of leading them into areas of splendid newness. This surely is the most valuable legacy we can pass on to the next generation. Not money, not houses, or heirlooms, but a capacity for wonder and gratitude, a sense of aliveness and joy." - Quoting Arthur Gordan
14:39 - Business Made Simple by Donald Miller - includes 60 free videos with his book.
14:52 - Autobiography of George Mueller - A man of faith who built orphanages in the UK filled with stories of miracle provision.
15:25 - Walking with God by John Eldredge

Conversation Links:

Register for FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team

162 | Derek Johnson from Jesus Culture on Creating Heart Strings Feb 25, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Derek Johnson

Derek Johnson is a singer-songwriter who has a heart to see people experience the power and extravagant love of God through music that carries God's presence and anointing. He led worship at Bethel Church in Redding, CA for 5 years before relocating to the Sacramento area with the Jesus Culture team. He believes strongly in serving the local church and is a Jesus Culture Music artist and worship leader at Jesus Culture Sacramento. His heart is to see people transformed by encounters with Jesus who then transform the culture they live in. Derek is a relevant voice to this generation with a strong anointing for bringing intimacy and the joy of the Lord through praise and worship.

Show Notes:

4:40 - "It's been a continuous journey that I've found with my daughter and now with my son is when you have children, I think more than even in marriage, you start to understand what love actually is and what love looks like, and kind of that responsibility in that way, that hits you."
14:09 - Books by John Eldredge - Wild and Heart and Fathered by God
14:23 - Takeaways from the book Fathered by God: "One, we need to be really intentional in the way that we father our kids, that really it is going to have to happen on purpose. To get in there and have the conversations and have the heart connection, realizing that our kids don't know how to do it."
15:19 - Creating "heartstrings" with our kids - where they open their hearts to us and we open our hearts to them.
15:45 - It's important to have grace for ourselves.
17:45 - The Voice of the Heart book by Chip Dodd
17:50 - "What I loved about Fathered by God was actually just the permission to recognize the gaps, to feel the pain of the gaps."
18:36 - Takeaways from the book The Voice of the Heart by Chip Dodd - "The cool thing that this book highlights is that your anger is connected to passion. So somewhere in there, if you filter that pain and that anger correctly, what you'll find is something you're actually deeply passionate about."
19:30 - "So these books are super instrumental and I think connecting that, God created us with emotions. They are there for a reason. They do need to be managed and certainly they need to be touched by the Holy spirit so areas can heal. But they're supposed to be in there."
20:00 - "And I think if, for us, as men, for us as fathers, if we have a vision - and we should have this vision - to have kids who are emotionally healthy and capable in their friendships and their marriages and their careers, then we have to begin by doing the inner work ourselves. And just being that example."
23:55 - Sharing the difficult journey of conceiving a second baby
31:55 - On living out Christian values with our kids: "I don't even want to list it out on a list and so that they can memorize it. I'm like, I want to live it so that you can catch it."

Conversation Links:

Derek Johnson Worship Artist
Jesus Culture - https://jesusculture.com/
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team

Full Transcript:

https://dadawesome.org/162notes/

161 | Dr. Efrem Smith on Cross-Cultural Relationships, Raising Champions & Modeling a "Sneak Preview" of Heaven Feb 18, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Dr. Efrem Smith

Efrem Smith is a pastor, consultant, speaker, and author. He is passionate about life transformation, multi-ethnic development, thriving churches, and community development. As a product of the African-American Church, he also serves as a collaborative catalyst for African-American Church Planting, Disciple Making, and Urban Empowerment Movements.

Efrem was the founding pastor of The Sanctuary Covenant Church, a multi-ethnic church in Minneapolis, MN, He served as the Superintendent of the Pacific Southwest Conference of the Evangelical Covenant Church. He also served as the President of World Impact, an urban missions organization. Currently, Efrem is the Co-lead Pastor of Bayside Church Midtown, a thriving and multi-ethnic community in Sacramento, California. He is also Co-Owner of Influential LLC, a speaking, consulting, and coaching ministry. Efrem is also a Catalyst for African-American Networks for City to City North America. Efrem has been married to his wife Donecia for 28-years and they have two daughters.

Show Notes:

3:22 - Movie "Black Panther" - "he simultaneously shows such great reverence and honor for his dad, but he disagrees with his dad at the same time. And I think that shows a real tension of the way in which we honor our parents. But then there are these moments where we may have a sense of calling in our life that that is so different that we decide there's a different way in which we're called to serve, a different way in which we're called to look at a career or a decision in life. And we're trying to simultaneously go a different way from our parents, but yet love them and honor them at the same time."
4:24 - Examples of ways Efrem stepped outside of the path his parents expected
6:42 - Examples of fathering characteristics that Efrem has tried to copy from his dad
10:13 - "Our lives can be a sneak peek to the Kingdom of Heaven" and I rewrote it, "our lives as dads can be a sneak peek to our kids, but way beyond just our own households."
10:23 - How to be dads who lead our families into courageous conversations about justice, racism and reconciliation
11:37 - A story of his dad treating others well even when he was treated poorly - "One of the things that my dad modeled in front of me was in spite of racial divisions and racial unrest, he was somebody that treated everybody respectfully and fairly... I had a chance to see my dad, even in the midst of times not being treated as well as he should have been treated in society, still treated other people - especially the people that were the skin color of others that weren't treating him so well, he didn't do that back."
12:26 - "I've tried to model racial reconciliation and unity and diversity in front of my daughters. And I know that that's impacted their relationships."
13:56 - "Maybe that's one sign that I'm modeling something well in front of my kids, that they see my intentionality showing reconciled, beloved community in front of them. And so that's one way we can be a sneak preview of heaven is in our relationships... allowing our kids to see that we're intentional about cross-cultural relationships."
14:50 - Additional practical ideas to help raise kids who can see the beauty in all people. "Even the dolls, even the toys that they had were intentional about their diversity. So they could see beauty and all kinds of people. They could see intelligence, they could see problem solving. They could not only see that they themselves could be anything, but they could see that other cultures, other people groups could be anything just by the kinds of storybooks and coloring books and toys."
15:35 - Time Machine Advice - Wishing that he would have listened more to his daughters
16:44 - Spending more time praying for our kids
17:35 - Efrem coaching us on the theme of raising daughters with INFLUENCE
17:40 - Documentary on Venus and Serena Williams - https://www.amazon.com/Venus-Serena-Williams/dp/B00CBFB8MG
"As long as they could remember their dad told them they would be champions. There was this part of the documentary where when they were being asked, when did you know you were going to be great? And they were like, we always knew we were going to be great because our dad always told us we were going to be champions. Our dad always said, you're going to win Wimbledon. You're going to win the US Open. You're going to win the French Open and you're going to win it multiple times. Both of you will be champions. Both of you will be great tennis players."
18:35 - "When I would pray with my daughters at night, when I would put them in bed, I would say, 'repeat after me, I'm a queen. I'm beautiful. I'm God's daughter, I'm a champion.'"
21:00 - The decision to be more vulnerable and show emotions in front of his daughters
22:35 - "Now my dad and I talk and we can't have a phone conversation without my dad saying, 'I love you. I'm proud of you. I love you'....and even at 52 years old, hearing my 77 year old dad say that to me even now is so empowering [and] so transformative. And so, I think for me, one thing I would say is dads need to not be afraid, not be hesitant in a healthy way of being vulnerable in front of your kids, because what that shows is that you're not stronger than the creator of the universe."
23:06 - "We do a disservice to our kids if we lead them to believe that we can live well without God, that we can navigate life's challenges in our own power, in our own strength."
23:41 - "Letter from a Birmingham Jail" [Dr Martin Luther King Jr.]
24:16 - What are some ways that I'm missing it and being a "White Moderate?"
26:10 - "Sometimes what it's about is the things you should do that you aren't doing, not the things that you're not doing that are blatantly and evil. It's about the things that you're passively avoiding, the things that you refuse to step into."
27:08 - "I think we need to look beyond the sins that we didn't commit and look at the actions that we refused to live into."
28:52 - "A meal where I would ask everybody to bring something that represented their upbringing, their culture... I would say during dinner, the same way we're digesting one another's foods, we have to be willing to digest one another stories, one another's pain, one another's dreams without our first reaction being judgment or denial... We have to digest these stories, receive them without initial denial or judgment. And I think that if we're willing to do that, that makes us better parents to our kids. And it makes us better dads when we're still learning and listening and receiving."
32:26 - "Don't take the moments you have right now for granted and allow God to reinvent you as a dad at the different stages of your kids' lives."
32:30 - CLOSING PRAYER

Conversation Links:

160 | Raising Passionate Jesus Followers (Phil Comer & Brook Mosser) Feb 11, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Phil Comer

After raising four kids who are all walking with Jesus, Phil & Diane were commissioned by the elders with the task of teaching parents how to raise passionate Jesus followers. Phil Comer, with assistance from his wife Diane and his son, John Mark, was the founding pastor of Westside: A Jesus Church, a large and vibrant church that welcomes millennials in Portland, Oregon. After handing the lead role over to his son, he and Diane launched Intentional: Raising Passionate Jesus Followers conferences as a way of teaching and training the hundreds of young parents in their church who were now raising families of their own. With his 40 years of pastoral experience and counseling, and lessons learned through his own parenting, he and Diane are bringing parents hope and practical help to accomplish their God-given task of raising children who will walk with God in vibrant faith.

Brook Mosser

Brook and Elizabeth Mosser help lead the Intentional Parent's ministry with Phil and Diane as well as serve at Riverbend Church in Bend. Elizabeth is Phil and Diane's daughter, which makes Brook their son in law, which means they are all family learning to do this thing called life and relationships together. They live in Bend, OR with their four children Duke (9), Scarlet (7), Birdie (3), and Sloane (1). Brook and Elizabeth are passionate about seeing their own four kids become all in disciples of Jesus and helping other's do the same.

Video of this Conversation:

http://bit.ly/DA160vid

Show Notes:

2:50 - Raising Passionate Jesus Followers book
3:00 - Disproportionate relationships
4:45 - Phil's father's day message "Fathering Like a Father" YouTube Link
5:14 - Jeff asked Phil to speak life over Brook
5:33 - John 1 - Jesus was full of grace AND truth
8:12 - What does it mean to have a generational vision?
10:41 - "And I think sometimes we need to remember that what we're doing with our kids is of eternal value. We're affecting their eternity and even generations to come." - Phil Comer on having a generational vision
11:17 - Jeff asks Brook about the concept of "Default Settings" in parenting
13:39 - Praying over the emotional wounds we've caused our kids
13:50 - Praying "God, would you just shield them from the worst parts of me?"
14:11 - Being aware of where your weaknesses impact your family.
15:36 - Discussing the importance of seeing the big picture and not focusing only on individual moments. Phil and Brook run an organization called "Intentional Parents"
17:22 - "Anything lasting, anything of eternal value, anything of substance, we can't do without Him. But as far as the big picture....we parent out of relationship - our relationship with God and our relationship with our kids and life, it's a rhythm, and God designed it that way."
18:58 - You parent in relationships
19:33 - How to set your own family culture - have a macro vision. "What do we want to put into the world? What do we want to be known for?"
21:38 - What does it mean to "raise passionate Jesus Followers?"
21:56 - "Trying to raise kids that operate in a different kingdom all together."
22:50 - Analyzing scenes from movies to point out the lies people are believing.
23:41 - "So I think as far as raising passionate Jesus followers - it's every single moment is Deuteronomy 6. When you wake up, when you lie down, when you go along the road, you're talking about Jesus, you're doing it yourself. You're not asking your kids to beat something that you're not beating yourself. And it's raising kids that really know and love Jesus."
24:35 - Phil talks about when dads realize that it's a partnership with their wives, realizing kids are a gift from God, and their job as a dad is important - that's the lightbulb moment for dads at their conferences.
Phil quoting his son, John Mark Comer, "Pretty much every problem in the world goes back to fathers not doing what they were called to do and not walking with the Father the way supposed to."
27:00 - "Cause I think everyone has father wounds in one way or another. Right? And you're never going to be a perfect dad, but you can be a thoughtful, intentional dad. And we're intentional about so many things in our lives. So as a dad, you can be intentional about your exercise, your hobbies, your work, your relationship with your wife, but oftentimes it doesn't usually trickle down to your kids, you know, by and large. And so I think if you can catch that vision to recognize like that is equally, if not more important than all those other things mentioned in the sense of work or hobbies or whatever, you will never regret it." - Brook
29:10 - Brook discussing how there is a process for you and your kids - there are phases
31:03 - Spiritual parenting - the most important thing you do is to teach your kid to walk with the Lord.
31:30 - The Foundation Years - the first 5 years
32:04 - The Framing Years - Elementary
32:18 - The Functional Systems - Teen years
32:44 - The Finishing Work - 18-22yrs
33:19 - The concept of the box from the book "Raising Passionate Jesus Followers" - Jesus is the foundation, then there is discipline, encouragement, the rod of correction, order. The top is affection, affirmation and fun.
36:15 - The most powerful parenting position is "with-ness"
37:37 - the greatest gift you can ever give your kids after leading him to Jesus is the gift of a good marriage.
38:20 - Phil's last word - "Tenderness" - 1 Peter 3 says, "You, in turn, must treat your wives with tenderness, viewing them as feminine partners who deserve to be honored, for they are co-heirs with you of the divine grace of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers."
39:26 - "So I just feel like the way we treat our wives, especially in front of our kids is of massive importance. You're teaching your sons how to treat their future wives."

Conversation Links:

Raising Passionate Jesus Followers: The Power of Intentional Parenting by Phil & Diane Comer
Intentional Parents - https://www.intentionalparents.org/
Intentional Parents Podcast:
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team

Full Transcript: https://dadawesome.org/160

159 | Zach Neese on Guarding the Doors of Our Kids' Hearts Feb 04, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Zach Neese

Zach Neese is a Worship Pastor at Gateway Church where he oversees all areas of worship education including discipleship and worship training classes. Zach believes there is a difference between "leading worship" and pastoring people in the presence of God, and his leadership reflects his passion for helping people develop vibrant, transformational relationships with Jesus. Zach is a gifted teacher and writes much of the church worship curriculum. He also trains and advises worship leaders and churches around the world. Before coming to Gateway, Zach taught, worked with emotionally disabled young people, served as a youth and worship pastor in several congregations, and directed the Christ For the Nations Institute School of Worship and Technical Arts where he trained worship ministers from over 50 countries. He is a seasoned songwriter of many popular songs including the following:

Video of this Conversation:

http://bit.ly/DA159vid

Show Notes:

2:18 - Throw Confetti and please add the hashtag #dadawesome https://dadawesome.org/confetti/
2:25 - Throw Feedback https://dadawesome.org/feedback/
2:35 - Throw Some Powerful Prayers https://dadawesome.org/pray/
5:35 - "That's comforting to me knowing that God knows I'm going to mess it up. And he still trusts me with some of his most precious people." We're never going to get it right all the time. Looking at the dads in the Bible...no one was a perfect dad.
6:40 - "I think we have to give ourselves a lot of grace and a lot of mercy, but I don't think it's ever too late to really begin ministering in your own house."
9:15 - Being a guardian of the doors in your household
12:11 - Story of Lot and Sodom and Gomorrah
13:42 - The history of entertainment industry and the greek god Dionysus.
16:03 - "So as I'm guarding the doors of my kids' hearts, and I'm teaching them to guard the doors of their hearts, I'm asking questions like this, 'What spirit is this entertaining?' Teach them to ask, 'what spirit is this elevating? What spirit is this welcoming?' Because if this is a door, I get to decide who I host, who I invite, who I welcome and who I host. And everything is entertaining to some spirit."
17:06 - What are we hosting in our home?
20:18 - Telling the story of watching a movie and realized how it affected his kids in their sleep.
21:50 - How to close the doors to darkness once they have been opened.
28:42 - How do we know our kids' hearts?
29:54 - Covenant Eyes
31:12 - "To me, heaven is not going to be paradise unless all my kids are there. So to me, the most important pursuit in my life is the pursuit of God."
33:03 - Zach's prayer

Conversation Links:

Our TOPPODCAST Picks

Follow Us

Stay Connected

Related Podcasts

Links

Stay Connected