DadAwesome

Latest Episodes:

207 | Stop Worrying & Start 2022 with Worship (Jeff Zaugg) Jan 06, 2022

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook

Show Notes:

0:59 - "As turn the calendar and look to the year 2022, I want to take an episode and set up some worship and a perspective of how big God is and how little our current stresses are..."
2:37 - My Daughters Share a Video Recording to encourage mommy to trust God to Provide
3:10 - Matthew 6:25-27 - "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[a]?
3:50 - "My daughters helped remind us of this promise. That worry does not help things. Worry is not setting us up for God's best. Worry is trusting in ourselves, and I want to start the year 2020 trusting God"
4:22 - This song is by Sean Curran, and it's called bigger than I thought
4:38 - Guys, our heavenly father is for us. Our Heavenly Father wants to remind us this is not about us figuring out what we can accomplish under our own strength. And there's the bridge to this song talks about I will rest in the father's hands, leave the rest in the father's hands like we don't have to carry it all that we are called to store or touch. We're dads of action DadAWESOME. We're not sitting back and just saying it'll all be OK, whatever. But God does not want us to start 2020 to God does not want us to to lead this fatherhood journey from a place of we're stressed out, we're worried and we're relying on ourselves.

Bigger Than I Thought

Speak to me When the silence steals my voice You understand me You understand me Come to me In the valley of unknowns You understand me You understand me

You understand me, God You understand me

So I throw all my cares before You My doubts and fears don't scare You You're bigger than I thought You were You're bigger than I thought So I stop all negotiations With the God of all creation You're bigger than I thought You were You're bigger than I thought You were

I believe But help my unbelief You understand me You understand me Help me reach The faith that's underneath You understand me You understand me

I will rest In the Father's hands Leave the rest In the Father's hands

WRITTEN BY SEAN CURRAN, NATALIE SIMS & ALLEN SWOOPE © 2019 Worship Together Music / sixsteps Songs / Sounds Of Jericho (Admin. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) / Lead And Yellow Publishing (BMI) (admin. by Round Hill Music) / This Is Swoope's (ASCAP)

10:27 Here's what I think happens when we have a small perspective of God and we have this big perspective of ourselves and the weight that we need to carry. I think we make a mess of things. We make a mess of our lives, of our families... when we put all the weight on our own shoulders. We trust in ourselves
11:00 - Story of my daughter Zara and the mess she makes when she eats
13:56 - "This is my life. God is trying to give me good gifts at a good rate, at a good pace that I can handle for my age and my responsibility level, right? God is trying. He's setting us up with blessings. "
14:23 "I'm not managing stresses. I'm a manager of good gifts, good blessings. That's what I'm managing. It's so easy to complain about what's going on in life. When I am managing God's good gifts that he is, he is trickled into my life and I'm complaining about it. Like, it's so common that we we enter a worry and we make our lives a mess because we don't trust our heavenly father. We don't trust him."
15:06 - 1 Peter 5:1-11 (Advice for Elders and Young Men)
1And now, a word to you who are elders in the churches. I, too, am an elder and a witness to the sufferings of Christ. And I, too, will share in his glory when he is revealed to the whole world. As a fellow elder, I appeal to you:
2Care for the flock that God has entrusted to you.
Watch over it willingly, not grudgingly—
not for what you will get out of it, but because you are eager to serve God.
3Don't lord it over the people assigned to your care, but lead them by your own good example.
4And when the Great Shepherd appears, you will receive a crown of never-ending glory and honor.
5In the same way, you who are younger must accept the authority of the elders. And all of you, dress yourselves in humility as you relate to one another, for
"God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble."a
6So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor.
7Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.
8Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.
9Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith. Remember that your family of believers all over the world is going through the same kind of suffering you are.
10In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Christ Jesus.
So after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation.
11All power to him forever! Amen.
17:39 - "I pray that we would start the year 2022 to with a posture of worship versus a posture of worry, a posture of trusting God versus a posture of struggle and trying to do it on her own. A posture of God's bigness. He is so much bigger and we need to keep that perspective of he knows best. His ways are bigger and wider and deeper and strong. Guys, we have a limited perspective. Let's choose to worship versus worry."

Episode Links:

Worship Song = Bigger Than I Thought (SEAN CURRAN)
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team
https://dadawesome.org/tour/

Conversation Transcript

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206 | Gentleness, Humility & Unforced Rhythms (Matt Fogle) Dec 30, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Matt Fogle

Matt grew up as a wild middle child in rural IL and now lives in AZ with his wife Jen and 4 kids. For over ten years Matt has been a pastor in TX & IL & AZ. He's a spiritual director, pastor, and retreat guide that works with multiple non-profits in the areas of leadership development and spiritual formation.

Show Notes:

LIVE WITH RHYTHM. LEAVE A LEGACY. FINISH WELL. https://harborministries.com/
Episode 81 | Adjust the Pace, Live with SELF-CONTROL & Hear God's Voice (Tim Bohlke)
3:57 - Matthew, 11, Jesus's invitation in Matthew, 11:28-30 "Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."
6:00 - "I've been in a radical pursuit of trying to figure out how do I learn not only how do I learn these unforced rhythms, but how do I demonstrate in a way to others that makes them feel like, oh, I could enter into that rhythm of life too"
6:49 - "learn to live or to live freely and lightly or, as most translations say. Take my yoke upon you, you know, because I am gentle and humble in heart. So that's where Eugene Peterson, when he translates the message that we're gentle, unforced, right, unforced rhythms"
book mentioned: Gentle and Lowly: The Heart of Christ for Sinners and Sufferers by Dane C. Ortlund
9:00 - "What's God's heart gentle and lowly, humble... And to be a parent like that to enter into a relationship, whatever stage? Or I mean, even if you have a grown kids to constantly be in a posture of gentleness towards them. It doesn't have to go my way."
9:36 - "Maybe God is the primary agent of my kids spiritual formation, not me. And so it's my job to ask good questions and listen and be patient along the journey"
10:22 - speedboat versus sailboat
11:48 - "I love that illustration when it comes to life in rhythm with Jesus is, are we developing a motor boat mentality? By the way, we're living, are we in control or we telling God what direction we want to go and how fast we want to go? You know, specifically with our marriages and with our kids, are we the ones telling God, I want you to do this in my kids life and I want you? I want him to look like this or her to look like that? Or are we hoisting up our sails every day and saying, God, however you want to blow into my sails, however you want to blow into their sails helped me to be a good, like, non anxious cooperative friend"
13:48 - "in small ways and big ways, we can hoist up our sales daily and trust that the wind of God, the spirit of God, is going to blow into our sales and move us in the direction at the pace that he is setting, which is so un-American."
17:16 - Parker Palmer Clearness Committee - short video: https://vimeo.com/139027540
17:24 - "We gathered some friends. So remember there was a handful of friends that didn't have any emotional attachment to our decision. So that's key. Yeah, is find people that just are working for your good and for discernment"
22:01 - "I'm a huge believer in that. Jesus meets everybody in the gospels where they're at and invites them to take the next step from where they're at..."
25:39 - Lazy Dad Games
26:06 - "We learned early on that when we prepare for the morning, the next day, we're teaching our kids how to set intentional things out for the next day. So the next morning is an anxious and hurried right."
26:42 - Imaginative Prayer: A Yearlong Guide for Your Child's Spiritual Formation ( Jared Patrick Boyd )
27:50 - Winnie the Poo -- "Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart"
S2 Episode 5 | Gospel Clarity on Parenting -- Life in Rhythm Podcast
https://podcasts.apple.com/lu/podcast/s2-episode-5-gospel-clarity-on-parenting/id1545668466?i=1000535126316
29:02 - "we put these heavy. Things on ourselves that God is not laying on us at all. And we put pressure where there doesn't need to be pressure, we put obligations on it. And honestly, it turns into a pride thing. Not a humble thing"
30:22 - "Proverbs 4:23 that out of the overflow of the heart like, comes everything. So guard your heart above all else for from it flows springs of living order."
30:55 - "if you want your kids to overflow with life, you've got to be connected to living water and you are parched. And it really is nobody else's responsibility. But yours to say no to a lot of good things..."
31:30 - "it's going to take intentionality and it's going to take you guarding your heart above all else. For from it flows living water. And this is meant to be an overflow journey, not one of scarcity, but one where you are being filled up daily to be poured out like a reservoir to fill your kids up and your wife and you can do it. And it's an invitation piece. It's not... God's not going to ever make you do this. You've got to take him up on his invitation."

Episode Links:

Conversation Transcript

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205 | Three Fatherhood Insights From Joseph Dec 23, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook

Show Notes:

1:35 - "Part of the dad life is you have expectations and you think it's going to be like this and it's like that. And that is the story of Christmas, and that is the story of Joseph. So Jesus earthly father Joseph, he experienced disappointment beyond what we could ever imagine. I wanted to just I wanted to riff on the story of Joseph for just a few minutes"
2:44 - "I want to grow in these areas and be more like Joseph, the father of Jesus. So here's these three fatherhood insights from the life of Joseph"
2:55 - Matthew 1:19 "Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. 19Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly."
4:35 - So he did not react in the moment. He paused. That's the first fatherhood principle. He paused. Joseph paused.
4:53 - "I have a I have a problem with pausing. Often I react my. My first reaction, guys, is to react in a reactive fatherhood, reactive. In my marriage, being a husband who is reactive in the moment responds with emotion and frustration causes so many problems. And if Joseph could in this kind of setting, if Joseph could pause..."
5:37 - Story - hiking Sabino Canyon in Tucson, AZ
9:20 - Matthew 1:20 "But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream"
9:42 - He went beyond the pause to a consideration he considered he. He pondered he he thought about what's the right course of action forward"
10:57 - Matthew 1:24 "When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife" -- Guys, I think the consideration in the pause are the set up for God revealing direction for us in our fatherhood. That's what happened with Joseph. His pause in his consideration led to the Lord appearing to him in a dream. An angel appeared to him in a dream and gave him clarity, gave him insight that took the devastation and put it back to a place of hope and of I'm a part of a bigger miracle.
12:05 - "What starts is devastation. The woman I'm engaged to, this is Joseph thinking. The woman I'm engaged to, has betrayed my confidence, has broken this pledge has has become pregnant from another man. Instead of that, she. Instead, the pause in the consideration led to Joseph realizing he's right at the center of a miracle."
13:56 - We need these three things these fatherhood principles the pause, the consideration, and we need guidance. We need to follow that guidance, not follow our own insights and strategies, especially when devastation. Don't trust your own. I don't want to trust my own insights and guidance when when it when it when loss or a change of plans caused me to be emotionally reactive. I want to pause. I want to consider and I want to follow God's will lead God's guidance."
14:35 - Joseph had three other miraculous dreams.
15:01 - Joseph actually has a pattern of multiple times hearing angelic, miraculous guidance in his dreams, and I believe it's from a posture of his heart was at a place where he had calmness in the place of devastation. And it's from pausing and considering and following the voice of our heavenly father.
15:24 - God trusted Joseph with his son, Jesus, and got his trust in each of us with these precious kids in my prayer for you"
16:13 - Jeff's Closing Prayer

Episode Links:

Another Podcast Episode about JOSEPH (Becoming A King - Morgan Snyder)
Christmas book - The Indescribable Gift. Blending tradition, biblical story, historical fact, and sanctified imagination, Richard Exley uses words like chisels and scalpels to unveil the heart of the Incarnation. You don't want to miss a chance to add this collection of beautifully imagined eyewitness accounts to your holiday library.
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team
https://dadawesome.org/tour/

204 | Measuring Legacy, Exploring Anger & Breaking Generational Patterns (Zack Curry) Dec 16, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Zack Curry

Zack Curry is the Lead Pastor at Jesus Culture San Diego. Zack experienced a significant move of God in high school that marked his life forever. His passion is to see love released on campuses and see schools transformed by God. For the past 15 years Zack's ministered to high school and college students, raising them up as leaders heading into all areas of society to see cultural transformation. He is passionate about community and family. He believes healthy people and thriving relationships are the true measure of success. He leads from a desire to see lives and cities transformed by an encounter with Jesus. Zack and his wife Melissa delight in their three wonderful daughters.

60-Day Fitness Challenge

Join the dadAWESOME MURPH on Saturday, February 12th, 2022
WHY? Winter is an easy time to step back and take it easy. We are challenging dads to get stronger this winter.
WHAT? We are launching a 60-day MURPH training plan leading up to Saturday, February 12th, 2022
WHEN? It starts this week and the actual event can be on or around Saturday, February 12th.
WHERE? Anywhere. Your basement, gym, playground, RV or wherever you can find open space and a pull-up bar.
HOW? We will support you through a SLACK group with a professional athletic trainer creating workout plans and answering your questions. (we will send you an invitation to SLACK after you register)
DIFFICULTY LEVEL? You can do a 1/2 MURPH or FULL or add the weight of your kids to make it harder. Here's the standard challenge started specifically to honor Navy Lieutenant Michael Murphy, who was killed in action in Afghanistan on June 28th, 2005:
1 mile run 300 air squats 200 pushups 100 pull-ups 1 mile run
KIDS JOINING ME? We are adding a gamification system to encourage you to include your kids in the actual February 12th, 2022 workout challenge. Place them on your back or on your shoulders... Strap on your baby to add some weight for the pull-ups. Invite your kids to run or bike along with you on your two 1-mile runs.

JOIN the 60-Day Challenge

Show Notes:

Episode 83 - https://dadawesome.org/episode83/
6:21 - "For me, as a father, it's prioritizing that role, this sacred role, privilege of being a father"
7:21 - "This is a sacred call, an honor. And to you have to prioritize it"
8:41 - "one of my indicators and the lights that come on for me is when I get frustrated or angry"
10:56 - "as a dad, I care for my kids deeply and I'm in scenarios where I actually don't know what to do. So I feel out of control. And so then my default is frustration"
18:58 - "We love the concept of adventure. But I think for a lot of us in our own lives, the unknown can paralyze us and keep us where we know we're safe, we have control..."
20:36 - "we could just sit here all day and tell stories of why do we believe God's real? Because we've seen it in our life over and over when we couldn't do it in the big and the small way?"
22:07 - "we want to do it for them or fix it or solve it when you know we can actually help guide them through and say, Hey, OK, is that is that true? Is like, what is God say about that? And then like, Hey, we're like teaching them to bring it to God, invite God and teach them to say, OK, yeah, it is impossible from you can't do it. But what would happen if God helped you like? Then it becomes these, you know, like in the Old Testament, where you have these memorial stones that you build and say, Oh, OK, and you're and you're along their journey teaching them to say, Hey, remember when God did this for you? Not for me? They're watching us. But you're like, Maybe when you did that for you, that's a memorial stone in your journey. Look back..."
23:40 - "one of the values for me with my daughters is to be connected to their heart. So like, so they feel I just want them to always be able to talk to me"
25:22 - "teaching them to dream a little bit bigger, not just settle with, OK, yeah, what? What's the truth? What does God say"
27:06 - "we did this challenge. There were four parts to it. We said, Hey, we want to build a rhythm of adventure, which is like taking care of our soul for us individually and for us, for our kids. We're like, Hey. So it's kind of broken up into a weekly, monthly, quarterly and then yearly."
27:30 - once a week, go on an adventure
27:48 - monthly, go do an overnight or full day type of activity
28:05 - quarterly is like planned, like an adventure that is substantial
28:13 - a once a year epic kind of trip
33:56 - "this is probably my philosophy on parenthood. And, you know, as a dad is just invited to be a part of it. So we just we were outside of a need, you know, for anything healing provision, any of those areas we teach our girls that God is good, that he's powerful, that he you know, he. He's alive and moving like these are truths that are true in every season. Good, bad, hard..."
37:21 - do the work to grow, to go deeper... Don't run away from the hard things or not to label it as failure or yourself is failure. But listen, we have this is the kingdom of God."
38:13 - "Don't run away from it. Dive into that because in it, your pain, your weakness actually...Paul said that his power is made perfect and our weakness"

Episode Links:

Jesus Culture San Diego
https://jesusculture.com/podcasts/show/man-camp/
https://dadawesome.org/strong/
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team
https://dadawesome.org/tour/

Conversation Transcript

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203 | My Dad Was The Loudest (Simon Osamoh) Dec 09, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Simon Osamoh

Simon Osamoh is a British American, raised in Reading, England. When he emigrated to the States in 2011, he took charge as Head of Counter Terrorism at Mall of America in Minnesota... Born to a Nigerian father and British mother, his parents separated before he was born. Growing up mixed race in white neighborhoods, and without a father he battled validation and his own identity for many years.

Simon now coaches young men to never give up, and that adversity can become your greatest gift. He is a nationally known speaker, entrepreneur, author, mindset and podcast coach, and the Host of the Who I Became Podcast where he interviews impactful individuals who share their life stories.

Show Notes:

https://dadawesome.org/tour/
4:36 - "I've never met the man that brought into my world. I'm a color of skin for someone I've never met and it just has a lot of questions and challenges. But I've had in my life, but I have never considered myself to be a victim. I sort of move past adversities and sure to come out through part of my my story today."
7:33 - "what I knew I wanted to do when I became a husband and a father is I wanted to try and give my sons what I was missing. But that hasn't come without challenges..."
16:38 - "my son knows because he can always hear me. What he remembers about his games is that my dad was the loudest. My dad was shouting, and it's intentional. The reason why I do that, I scream over every other father there because I want Mason to remember when he's 21, 25, 40, 70, whatever it is, and I'm no longer there. His memory would be, You know what? My dad was the loudest... My dad was the loudest person at my game, and that's the memory, because that's what I never had."
17:55 - "I might not always communicated it because I'm human and I make mistakes. But please never underestimate the significance that you have to me "
20:14 - "I believe in you. And I always knew that if you could walk in the light, but you could achieve greatness"
20:25 - "I started to say to myself, If not me, then who"
21:21 - "I asked myself, if not me, then who? If I'm not going to be that role model for a stranger, then who is, you know, I'm feeling called to make sure people know the best someone they're rooting for them might not always be to give you the answer, but you want to hear. But if not me, then who? And I believe we can all start a lot more in our own lives."
23:41 - "I was seeking validation from a father that never came."
26:36 - "Let's focus on what I can control. I can't control the past, but I can control the future. And there's going to be a time when my sons, as they do now at eight and 11, they're going to ask me questions about my dad and I need to give them some, some answers."
29:57 - "what I try and say to my sons and I would encourage your listeners is to just keep driving forward. Sometimes we set really large goals, but I don't. I just move, you know, one percent. How can I get one percent better each time? And that's what I say to my sons son's."

Episode Links:

Conversation Transcript

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202 | The 6 Pillars of Intimacy | PART 2 (Tony DiLorenzo) Dec 02, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Tony DiLorenzo

Tony DiLorenzo is the Amazon bestselling author of 7 Days of Sex Challenge, Connect Like You Did When You First Met, and other books. Tony believe that the healthy combination of sex, love, and commitment is more than the foundation of a strong marriage… it's the glue that will keep a marriage together.

Listen to his weekly podcast, ONE Extraordinary Marriage Show, at OneExtraordinaryMarriage.com, where nothing is off limits when it comes to the many aspects of marriage.

Tony has been married to his beautiful wife, Alisa, for 25 years and together they have a son and a daughter. He lives in San Diego, CA

Show Notes:

https://dadawesome.org/tour/
Episode 201 - PART 1
Book - The 6 Pillars of Intimacy: The Secret to an Extraordinary Marriage
- Emotional Intimacy This Pillar involves a closeness created through sharing each other's feelings, thoughts, and desires. This is both verbal and non-verbal communication. It's more than just, "Can we talk?"
- Physical Intimacy Think of this Pillar as every type of loving touch. This can be holding hands, a hug, a kiss, or even cuddling. You were designed to be touched. It's answering the question, "How do you like to be touched?"
- Financial Intimacy This Pillar is the sharing of your financial situation. It's developing a plan for your finances, from how much you spend on date night, to joint accounts, to planning for retirement. This is more than, "We need to talk about the budget..."
- Spiritual Intimacy Think of this Pillar as religious beliefs and observed religious practices. This can be as simple as praying together, going to church together, or discussing spiritual issues as a couple. This answers the question, "How are we spiritual together?"
- Recreational Intimacy What you do together at home, or on dates, or just for fun, is what this Pillar is about. It's the plans the two of you make to spend time together, doing things you enjoy. When this is working, you don't sit in the driveway playing the "What do you want to do?" game.
- Sexual Intimacy This is the Pillar that encompasses everything about your sexual connection with your spouse. This can be romance, initiating, foreplay, and sexual intercourse. There's no two ways about it: Sex is h-e-a-l-t-h-y. But this intimacy goes way beyond, "Hey, wanna have sex?"
https://www.ramseysolutions.com/
You Need A Budget: https://www.youneedabudget.com/
4:10pm - Proverbs 27:23-27 -- Know well the condition of your flocks, and give attention to your herds, for riches do not last forever; and does a crown endure to all generations?

Episode Links:

The 6 Pillars of Intimacy: The Secret to an Extraordinary Marriage
https://oneextraordinarymarriage.com/
Tony's Podcast
FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team
https://dadawesome.org/tour/

Conversation Transcript

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201| The 6 Pillars of Intimacy | PART 1 (Tony DiLorenzo) Nov 25, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Tony DiLorenzo

Listen to his weekly podcast, ONE Extraordinary Marriage Show, at OneExtraordinaryMarriage.com, where nothing is off limits when it comes to the many aspects of marriage.

Tony has been married to his beautiful wife, Alisa, for 25 years and together they have a son and a daughter. He lives in San Diego, CA

Show Notes

https://dadawesome.org/tour/
4:57 - Rainbows and Unicorns - "Twenty fourth anniversary. She made a little post and she she just talked about, Hey, it was not all rainbows and unicorns. And she said, Hey, we didn't know how to be married. This is when you started. We didn't know how to communicate with each other. We didn't know how to make our relationship a priority. We didn't know how to juggle being parents and being spouses. We didn't know to be each other's lover and truly in those moments with one another. Basically, she goes on to say, we still don't know. So as the leaders of one extraordinary marriage, she she's she's goes public with it. We still don't know. We're learning, we're growing"
8:38 - "I truly want men around me who I can call at the drop of a hat and or text and just be like, Man, I need some prayer right now. I need somebody to talk to. Can we just go like once a month, just grab a coffee together? And I remember just praying that prayer in and it didn't happen like overnight."
11:07 - Taking that time and reading to them in bed.
13:55 - Walk and talks
15:37 - We schedule sex and that's been a habit we've been doing for 12 years now. Yeah. And that has kept our sexual intimacy on course from all those years. We came to an agreement 12 years ago that we wanted to have sex twice a week, and doing that has really created an ability for us to engage one another when it happens, which is great."
17:44 - We were never taught? Or does it teach us that we never saw it? So we're looking up to those around us mentors, parents, grandparents, whoever, and they never did it. So why would we?
The 6 Pillars of Intimacy: The Secret to an Extraordinary Marriage
- Emotional Intimacy This Pillar involves a closeness created through sharing each other's feelings, thoughts, and desires. This is both verbal and non-verbal communication. It's more than just, "Can we talk?"
- Physical Intimacy Think of this Pillar as every type of loving touch. This can be holding hands, a hug, a kiss, or even cuddling. You were designed to be touched. It's answering the question, "How do you like to be touched?"
- Financial Intimacy This Pillar is the sharing of your financial situation. It's developing a plan for your finances, from how much you spend on date night, to joint accounts, to planning for retirement. This is more than, "We need to talk about the budget..."
- Spiritual Intimacy Think of this Pillar as religious beliefs and observed religious practices. This can be as simple as praying together, going to church together, or discussing spiritual issues as a couple. This answers the question, "How are we spiritual together?"
- Recreational Intimacy What you do together at home, or on dates, or just for fun, is what this Pillar is about. It's the plans the two of you make to spend time together, doing things you enjoy. When this is working, you don't sit in the driveway playing the "What do you want to do?" game.
- Sexual Intimacy This is the Pillar that encompasses everything about your sexual connection with your spouse. This can be romance, initiating, foreplay, and sexual intercourse. There's no two ways about it: Sex is h-e-a-l-t-h-y. But this intimacy goes way beyond, "Hey, wanna have sex?"
22:55 - "But as a couple, you look at them together and go, which ones have cracks? Which ones are strong? And how do we continue to strive and go after the extraordinary we desire?"
23:57 - Emotional intimacy, obviously our verbal and nonverbal communication? How are we? How are we engaging our spouse? And so for many, it's just what we get. We get caught up in the day today. As dads, we get caught up in the day to day. Is the provider taking care of the yard? Maybe our toys, maybe wanting to go out to this or do that. But how are we really engaging our spouse? What are we doing on the regular that allows them to know that we're here and not just talk about laundry kid's work? I think that's the big thing,
25:46 - We use the app, the Voxer app, even though we could make a list and wait and talk about. And it's not just punch list of get the groceries or do this is actually lets me hear her tone and hear how is she doing, really? And then I can listen to that when I'm, you know, when I get done with this recording with you or is. So Voxer has been actually a tool that allows us to communicate more and to understand her heart.
26:15 - Walk and talk, but it could be a driving and dive. It could be a coffee chat, whatever that may be. That works for you guys.
27:07 - Physical Intimacy - "All your loving touches. This is not. This is does not mean sexual touch. This is like kisses holding hands. Hand on the knee, cuddling, hugging."
28:45 - (Jeff) These do apply around dads to kids, as well as husband to wife, because I mean, those first things. First of all, we already talked about, like my desire for all four of my daughters, is that I am intentional around putting my arm around and giving them that morning hug when they come down again, the hand on the knee that that emotionally they know that I want to connect and hear their heart and what makes them feel loved. And so. So we really can take this further than just our one extraordinary marriage,

Episode Links:

The 6 Pillars of Intimacy: The Secret to an Extraordinary Marriage
https://oneextraordinarymarriage.com/
Tony's Podcast
FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team
https://dadawesome.org/tour/

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200 | Belly Laughter, Feeling Stuck & Sailboat Fatherhood (Jeff Zaugg) Nov 18, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Jeff Zaugg

Jeff and Michelle Zaugg celebrated 15 years of marriage last summer. They currently live in a 37 foot RV traveling across the United States with their 4 young daughters. After 10-years of entrepreneurial non-profit ministry leadership, Jeff served as a pastor at Substance Church in the Twin Cities for the past 7 years. In Fall 2020 Jeff took the leap and went full-time fatherhood ministry. He is the founder and lead cheerleader at dadAWESOME & FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS. When he's not wrestling or playing hide and seek with his daughters, you might find Jeff out for a bike ride, making a pour over coffee, sitting by a fire with his wife or challenging some friends to a game of Spikeball.

Show Notes:

1:23 - "When I say become dadAWESOME, it's never been about an arrival or I am dadAWESOME. You're not, I'm more dadAWESOME than you are anything like that. It's a journey of focus and intentionality of saying, I'm going to be dadAWESOME for my kids and I'm becoming. It's a never ending journey of becoming that will continue till we reach heaven, because even as a great grandfather, someday I'm still going to be becoming dadAWESOME. And I think focus matters. Focus matters on this journey.
2:28 - "A look BACK. This thing started with an idea of, what if we help encourage intentional fatherhood?
6:03 - A look FORWARD
6:12 - GOALS:
1. Keep cheering on intentional fatherhood.
2. Keep seeking wisdom, both practical ideas and high level perspectives around intentional fatherhood through interviews on the podcast
3. Keep rallying fathers to train together to do a hard thing on behalf of the fatherless
4. Keep growing partnerships with other like hearted organizations so that we can resource dads further with books and retreats and other things that we're not going to do immediately
6:49 - "My prayer is that we would awaken a generation of dads that would realize the fact that they have a Heavenly Father who wants to father them. I believe that many of us dads are living as if we were fatherless, so we're accidentally passing on pain to our kids, were passing on hurts to our kids because all of us have imperfect fathers... none of us are perfect fathers. None of us had perfect fathers, but were accidentally, I believe, living as if we were fatherless. When we have a Heavenly Father who wants to bring freedom and healing so that we can pass on LIFE and we can pass on JOY and PEACE and LOVE to our kids, not pain to our kids. So that's I look forward. I'm more passionate than ever."
8:01 - "My prayer is that every interaction (from dadAWESOME) would just be a nudge in the direction of treasuring the role of being a dad. It is such a gift that we get to be dads. It's such a gift and we've been entrusted these treasures, our kids. And that's my main prayers that any time you interact with dadAWESOME in any way that it would nudge you in that direction of seeing this as a gift from God that we get to be dads."
8:57 - IDEA #1 = "I think God wants me to laugh more often with my kids"
9:52 - Acts 8:8 says. And there was great joy in that city
10:21 - "May your homes be known as a place that there was great joy found in that home where kids think back about all these years and their dad and say there was great joy that just radiated from my dad. His eyes shined as he belly laughed."
10:44 - IDEA #2 = RV Story - the first 48 hours
14:05 - "I want to encourage you guys that stuck does not mean you're outside of God's will. Stuck does not mean you're going to stay stuck. Stuck does not mean that you messed something up. Stuck does not mean that you're inadequate. Stuck does not mean that you're unloved. Stuck does not mean it's easy. It's stuck is a perfect setup for the John 10:10 the thief comes to steal, kill and destroy. He wants to do that in your fatherhood journey your dad life. He wants to steal kill destroys often as possible"
14:48 - "You have a Heavenly Father who is for you and is known. He is famous throughout the history of the world for getting stuck people unstuck."
Exodus 14:13 "Moses answered the people, "Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today."
15:34 - "I'm a dad who has what it takes. I am dadAWESOME. You are dadAWESOME. Do not think that being stuck means that you don't have what it takes because God is fathering you. He's your Heavenly Father and he has gifted you your kids and he's like, Treasure those gifts"
16:08 - A speedboat mentality or a sailboat mentality
18:16 - "When we're feeling stuck, think sailboat, not speedboat. What if the wind is just not blowing? What if this is the time to learn and to be humble and to say, what can I take away from this versus a pointing at all the things that are wrong? What can I experience now that will help me be the dad that my kids need me to be?"
19:05 - "There are 40 people who have given to help finance some of the budget. This last year, about half of the budget was financed through 40 families. And and if some of you guys want to join that team to help fuel this movement www.dadawesome.org/give

Episode Links:

FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team

Conversation Transcript

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199 | You Need To Dance (Wayne Francis) Nov 11, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Wayne Francis

Wayne Francis leads the New York City location of The Life Church and was the founder and lead pastor of the former Authentic Church, which merged with The Life Church in early 2020. Wayne and his wife, Claudene, have been married for twenty years and have two beautiful teenage daughters, Haleigh and Ryleigh.

Show Notes:

Coming SOON

Episode Links:

https://thelifechurch.com/locations/new-york
http://leadershipinblackandwhite.com/
FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS
Make a Donation to dadAWESOME
Join the dadAWESOME Prayer Team

Conversation Transcript

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198 | Speaking Blessings, Hearing God's Voice & Exposing our Kids to Missions (Seth Barnes) Nov 04, 2021

Show notes

dadAWESOME

We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. | YouTube | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

Seth Barnes

Seth Barnes is founder and president of Adventures in Missions, a discipleship and missions ministry that has taken over 125,000 people on mission projects around the world since 1989. The mission of Adventures is to deeply connect people to Jesus and his movement. Their goal is to train 100,000 disciple makers focused on fulfilling the Great Commission. Adventures has ministry training centers around the world that are focused on making that goal a reality.

To move toward the fulfillment of the vision, Seth also founded the World Race in 2005. The World Race provides trained teams of young adults the opportunity to engage in 11 international mission contexts in 11 months using an experiential, missional discipleship model. Adventures emphasizes listening prayer, relationships, and servanthood in their work amongst the poor. Both through ministry/training centers and World Race ministry teams, Adventures maintains an active presence in a number of African countries. In addition to overseeing Adventures in Missions, Seth is a speaker, author, and prolific blogger. His blog, Radical Living, can be found at www.sethbarnes.com. Seth is married to Karen. They have five children and seven grandchildren.

Seth's books on Amazon

Episode 200 Party:

Tuesday, January 9th from 8-10pm we are gathering 200 dadAWESOME friends for a couple hours of fun. Spikeball, Cornhole, Music, dadAWESOME Giveaways, Food and some Vision/Mission/Hopes for what's next.
We're hosting this party in NE Minneapolis at Ninth Street Soccer and Coffee: 801 SE 9th St, Minneapolis, MN 55414
Here's the RSVP Form: https://forms.gle/R3ApseRfsX49Kuk26

Make a DONATION to FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS

Show Notes:

Episode 200 Party: https://forms.gle/R3ApseRfsX49Kuk26
Join for dadAWESOME meetups around the south/southwest this winter!
3:19 -Adventures in Missions: The World Race
4:31 - Being a 9 year old with his dad in the Vietnam War
8:20 - YouTube clip from 1988 - pulling kids around on palm tree leaves example - 53 min. mark on this video)
8:40 - The continuum of softness to drivenness. Get feedback.
9:12 - And innovation, not just at work, but also on the playground, so that palm branch, it looked like just, you know, something might have to throw away or it could be this magical ride that they could jump on and pretend it's a horse or something, you know, and that's I always tried to approach the playtime that way, you know, inventing games not just like pulling down a box and opening it and letting somebody else set the rules.
10:44 - "So it's great to be soft when they're, you know, zero to five and they need boundaries, of course. But but you've got to start challenging them and people ask me, you know, when, when can I take my child on mission? Well I used to take them at age four and five on a mission. And man, that really tones down the entitlement, which is a huge issue these days for dads."
13:24 - the importance of challenging entitlement in our kids
13:59 - Somebody needs to be taking them out of entitlement, out of a self-focus, out of this place of just kind of, I don't know, they get to Yale and they're called snowflakes. I mean, we've got to stop this as a as a nation or we're just not going to have a generation to hand any kind of inheritance to"
14:14 - How do we help our kids embrace pain?
14:56 - Know the phase you are in: Ages 0-5 - Identity formation. Ages 6-12 - Body, Soul & Spirit formation. Ages 13-18 - Connection to the world of adults.
- 1. From 0-5 Identity formation. Main job is loving them & attachment formation. Key activities: Focused attention, touch, eye contact. Play with them & teach them agency (example - me 33 yrs ago playing w/ the kids - 53 min. mark on this video)
- 2. From 6-12 Body, soul & spirit formation: Main job is mentorship/discipleship. Stay deeply connected w/ them and help them move toward, not away from challenge so that curiosity guides them and kids become lifelong learners. This is where the battle for faith is won or lost. My secret weapon was to take/send them on mission.
- 3. From 13-18 Connecting to the world of adults. Help them embrace the process of growing, especially by embracing the healthy pain of responsibility & discipline. In this last stage, I watch so many dads absolutely fail. They don't trust their kids and specifically, they don't trust them with what I call "healthy pain" - instead confusing it with the kind of caustic pain that they often have not adequately processed themselves.
15:20 - Piaget and cognitive development
18:01 - "And we've got to lean into the future if we're ever going to raise greatness in our kids."
18:09 - John Tyson's Primal Path - The capstone was The World Race for his son.
21:05 - "We're going to do fun and missions. And, you know, I'm just trying to bait the hook and and get everybody to see that there is a bigger picture by exposure."
21:15 - Recognize there are four levels of covenant relationship
- You and God
- Good Family
- Community
- Affect the world
21:53 - "You've got to recognize true religion. James, 127, says, is widows and orphans in their distress. Let's go take care of them. Let's go and recognize that we're not the center of the universe."
22:50 - "that was the pivotal moment in my life. Maybe there's that, you know, when I ask my wife to marry me, but I asked that question and I was in a broken place. I mean, our marriage wasn't the best and we're at a marriage retreat and I needed to hear God. I mean, I was desperate. And God spoke to me in a voice that it was just incontrovertible. It was him. And he said, I love you, Seth and I. I just wept. I was just a puddle of tears. This is what I've been waiting all my life to hear, but didn't know that I could, that it was even available and it made all the difference"
24:03 - Tips for hearing the voice of God
24:12 - "I would get all five of them (his kids) and we get on our knees on the couch and we talked to God. And I just ask questions. And I was present and I was intentional. So I think you've got to find a way to carve out that space. And if you have that space, if you need to, if you need curriculum or just some prompts, there's a book I wrote called The Art of Listening Prayer.
25:30 - Story of Seth leaning in and pursuing healing with his dad
28:30 - Story of Jeff's dad and the moment of Jeff coaching his dad on how to pray a prayer of double blessing
(Jeff) 29:19 - "There's something about choosing, even though there's pain for many of us who are dads, you know, I'm thirty nine. There's pain. Pain can separate us from our earthly father or pain. We can choose to press through it. Just like you said, pain is great. Pain is good. We choose to press in and the gift and the blessing of choosing a president versus be hardened and calloused."
30:00 - Seth's Blog post with his Blessings For His Kids (linked here)
30:23 - ..."intentionally praying this prayer a blessing and consecration over my kids. And so, you know, that's something I think everybody let me just challenge everybody here. If you haven't blessed your kids in a way that if I were to ask your child, you know, have you been blessed by your dad? And they would say, Oh, definitely, if they can't answer that, then go ahead and do it again."
30:59 - "when you get to heaven, what I understand is it's Jesus that's waiting. And it's your family that's waiting. So your dad is like going to be waiting and there's not going to be this level of awkwardness there to just get over yourself. Have some courage, I vulnerability and courage or flip sides of the same coin. So just press into this stuff that's hard and do it."
31:20 - "if anybody needs to email me, I'll walk you through it. I got nothing better to do and to help you get to a place of reconciliation with those that are closest. sethbarnes (at) adventures (dot) org
31:50 - "there's two ways of blessing. One is with your actions, another is with your words. And if your actions don't match your words, then that's going to just look like hypocrisy.
32:54 - John O'Donohue, book To bless the space between us
34:25 - "liminal space is space in between thought and action. And so you got to have some thoughts and you've got to meditate on the implications. So I would carve out a half a day or at least an hour or two hours just to think about and I living at my potential."
34:42 - "there's greatness in you. There's amazing potential in you that you probably have not tapped and that God wants to tap. And he often uses our weaknesses. And that's where we're, you know, his strength shines through our weaknesses."
35:29 - "we ourselves should not be living in fear. We are more than conquerors. The words us and many of us don't live that way."
35:59 - "I started off the year by going to Nigeria, and it was amazing how many people are going to do that. And I don't know, you go, What is it that you need to do? That would be amazing. And maybe it's going somewhere. Maybe it's a hard conversation. Show some courage. That's my challenge to find a place where you can be courageous today and use that as a place to impart the Lord's strength to those that desperately need to hear from you."
Specific Blog Posts for dadAWESOME: Connecting them to the Lord and answering key questions through discipleship and mission (see this blog) Connecting my girls to boys in a safe way (see this blog and this one)

Episode Links:

Conversation Transcript

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