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    Counselling Tutor Podcast

    CPD, supervision and specialist training for counsellors

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    Latest Episodes:
    082 – Taking Risks in Therapy Jun 23, 2018
    Show notes

    In episode 82 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, Ken Kelly and Rory Lees-Oakes offer tips on how to study effectively. 'Practice Matters' addresses the difficult issue of taking risks in therapy. Last, the presenters discuss faith and religion, and whether these stem from an external or internal locus of evaluation. Effective Study (starts at 1.35 mins) In this first segment of the podcast, Ken and Rory offer a number of tips on how to study effectively: Research has shown that writing something down by hand helps you retain the information better than typing it on a computer etc. In particular, 'cheat sheets' (summaries of useful information - e.g. a list of key terms in person-centred theory, with short definitions of these) can be really useful. Another effective tool is flashcards - you can just use plain postcards or index cards, and write a key term on one side and the definition on the other. You can then either test yourself or use them as the basis for a game with one of your peers. If you are an auditory learner, you might find it helpful to record yourself reading out the material you need to learn, and then listen back to this. Try to ensure that you get enough sleep - being well rested is really important for effective study. Try to minimise your stress levels, as stress is a real mind-blocker. For example, plan ahead rather than leaving work until the last minute. Choose the time of day to study when you feel the most alert. For example, Ken likes the early morning, while Rory is a night owl. Take a break if you are tired. Above all, do what works best for you: you know the right way forward for yourself. Taking Risks in Therapy (starts at 13.01 mins) In 'Practice Matters', Rory discusses how to be a 'boundary ninja' - that is, working at the edge of boundaries, so long as this is in the service of your client. He describes a number of scenarios in which practitioners took risks that paid off in terms of helping clients move forward. While some people would see confronting or challenging a client as directive or even judgemental, others would describe doing so as courageously congruent. Rory provides various guidelines on how to strike the right balance here; these are described in his handout on taking risks in therapy. This can be downloaded here; it is also available in the Handouts Vault and Counselling Study Resource (CSR). Faith: Internal or External Locus of Evaluation? (starts at 17.49 mins) Ken and Rory discuss this complex but fascinating philosophical question. The person-centred approach arose from the Human Potential Movement; it represents a distinct set of ideas that are different from religion. It could be argued that the idea of original sin in religion is based on an external locus of evaluation. Similarly, it could be argued that the person-centred approach has an external locus, in that it seeks to apply theory created by someone else (i.e. Carl Rogers). When Rogers left Wisconsin and went to help found the Western Behavioral Sciences Institute, he became interested in encounter groups (now more commonly known as 'PD [personal development] groups'). In the 1960s, he held one of these with 600 sisters from the Immaculate Heart Society, who were working in elementary schools. The group was led by associates Bruce Meador and Bill Coulson. The sisters were interested in looking at how they could communicate with people from a non-faith-based tradition. Interestingly, the community ended up splitting up. In terms of how counselling and religion might interlink, the most important thing is for people to relate to each respectfully, taking the time and making the effort to understand each other's meanings in the world. While both religion and the person-centred approach assert that essence precedes existence (i.e. that we each start life with an innate purpose), existential therapy takes the opposite view - i.e. that existence precedes essence (i.e. that it is up to each individual to find their own purpose in the world). You can find a lecture by Rory on existential therapy in the CSR.


    081 – Timelines in Therapy Jun 16, 2018
    Show notes

    In episode 81 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, Ken Kelly and Rory Lees-Oakes offer guidance for disappointed students who haven't got a place on the course they wanted. 'Practice Matters' goes on to describe the use of timelines in therapy. Finally, the presenters discuss possible challenges to learning. Not Getting a Place on a Course (starts at 1.46 mins) It really is so very disappointing to find out you didn't get a place on the counselling course you applied for. Ken and Rory offer some tips for those in this situation: Remember that many courses are massively oversubscribed - so quite a number of people are bound not to get a place. Reflect on any feedback you have been given and try to learn from this. Think about whether there are other course providers that you could apply to. Don't forget that you don't have to follow the same awarding body all the way through - it's usually fine to swap between them on your progression route. Consider what you could do to improve your chances next year - and apply again then. Bear in mind that tutors are only human, and it's possible to have a personality clash with one. Tutors are under huge pressure these days to retain students for the full course duration, so they have to be selective about who they take, choosing those who seem best placed to be able to complete the training. Above all, remember that if you really want to be a counsellor, and are willing to persevere and work hard, you will get there: so don't give up! Timelines in Therapy (starts at 11.13 mins) It is easy, during counselling, to lose the ability to see the wood for the trees. Rory explains how using timelines can really help the counsellor and client together to 'helicopter' above the situation, spotting patterns and roots of problems. Timelines can be especially useful in supporting clients to take an overview of loss and other significant experiences in their life. Rory has written a detailed handout on this section of the podcast, which you can download here. Alternatively, it is available in the Handouts Vault and Counselling Study Resource (CSR). Overcoming Barriers to Learning (starts at 15.50 mins) Counselling training really is very demanding compared to many other courses of the same academic level: it demands a lot personally too. It can be difficult to balance the demands of studying, working and relationship/family commitments. Ken and Rory offer a number of tips on this: Before you start training, plan ahead for how you will slot all the different elements into place. If you have a specific learning difficult, e.g. dyslexia, then make sure you enlist your tutor's support, and get hold of any software (e.g. spellcheckers) that can help you; many such tools are available free of charge online these days. Come as you are with who you are: counsellors are hugely diverse and there is a place for everyone. For example, many people with a hearing or visual impairment have made a successful career in counselling. Don't procrastinate - try to stay on top of things as you go along. If you do experience problems, don't be afraid to ask for help. Tell your tutor straight away (unless you feel your tutor is the root of the problem - in which case, speak to the head of department). If you had difficult experiences in education in the past, remember that neither it nor you are the same now - so try not to stay stuck there. Remember that any barrier can be overcome if you are really determined: it can help to picture yourself holding that final diploma. Be as kind and empathic to yourself as you would to clients, showing yourself a high level of self-compassion.


    080 – Counselling Clients with Domestic Violence Jun 09, 2018
    Show notes

    In episode 80 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, Ken Kelly and Rory Lees-Oakes talk about counselling clients who are affected by domestic abuse. 'Practice Matters' discusses trauma-informed practice. Last, the presenters explain cognitive dissonance. Domestic Abuse (starts at 1.27 mins) All counsellors are likely to encounter clients who are experiencing domestic abuse at some stage in their career. It is really important to raise awareness of this issue among counsellors and others - this really can save lives. Rory shares some shocking statistics relating to domestic abuse in England and Wales, most of which were gathered from the website of Women's Aid: Two women are killed by a partner or ex-partner every week. Of all recorded crimes, 10% are domestic abuse. 100 calls per hour relating to domestic abuse are received by the police. Where gender is recorded, 92.1% of defendants in domestic-abuse cases are male, and 7.9% female. Meanwhile, 83.3% of victims are female and 16.7% male. On average, each victim of domestic abuse has made seven to eight attempts to leave the abuser. The clues to domestic abuse against a counselling client can be very subtle; it is important to be vigilant in order to pick up on these. The abuse may not be physical, but rather psychological or emotional. For example, the abuser might use gas-lighting (intentionally eroding the victim's belief in their own sanity) or threaten to put intimate photographs on the internet. Many victims of domestic abuse may feel tied into the relationship, and even have partners who are loving and caring for part of the time. The abuser may be full of regret and remorse after each incident, and the victim may believe that they really will change. However, it's unlikely that real change will occur without the abuser facing their challenges through therapy of their own. Explaining and holding the limits of confidentiality is of critical importance in this work, supporting the building of the therapeutic relationship while balancing the need for safeguarding too. Above all, be prepared: if a client does hint at domestic abuse, it is useful to understand something about this, and to know where you could refer them on to for expert help, guidance and protection. Trauma-Informed Practice (starts at 14.42 mins) Up until 1980, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) did not exist as a diagnosis. It was only when clinicians 'joined the dots' in the cases of Vietnam war veterans - realising the common threads of alcoholism, self-harm and anger-management issues - that the disorder was officially recognised. There are remarkable similarities between how victims of all different types of trauma process this. Understanding of PTSD, including how the human brain processes trauma, has grown hugely over the last 15 years in particular. Rory asserts that - in contrast to the usual stance of person-centred therapy, which advocates the uniqueness of each person's experience of the world - it can in fact be useful to use trauma-based interventions. In other words, it can really help clients to offer them psychological education. Understanding how the human brain is programmed to react in situations of trauma can provide clients with a huge sense of relief - for example, helping them understand why they did not fight back. You can download a detailed handout on this topic here, or it is available in the Handouts Vault and Counselling Study Resource (CSR) - where you will also find a lecture on trauma and abuse, and another two-part lecture specifically on working with sexual abuse. Cognitive Dissonance (starts at 20.10 mins) Rory shares the story of US psychologist Leon Festinger's cognitive dissonance theory. In an unusual piece of social research, Festinger and two colleagues infiltrated a doomsday cult. 'Cognitive dissonance' describes the situation when a person has conflicting beliefs or values. Festinger's cognitive dissonance theory suggests that this makes the person feel uncomfortable, and so leads them to adjust one of the beliefs or values, harmonising these in order to reduce the discomfort we feel. So how does cognitive dissonance theory apply to counselling? One area that it relates to is clients in abusive relationships. Because people have often invested heavily in such relationships (for example, financially, or in terms of children), they may tend to remain in them and to find ways to justify to themselves that the abusive behaviour is somehow acceptable. Known as 'trauma bonding', this is best tackled in counselling through a 'high challenge, high support' therapeutic relationship.


    079 – Becoming a Counsellor May 26, 2018
    Show notes

    Feelings of Incompetence - Working with a Third Person in the Room - Completing Your Placement Hours In episode 79 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, Ken Kelly and Rory Lees-Oakes offer tips on the common issue of having feelings of incompetence in the process of becoming a counsellor. 'Practice Matters' discussed working with a third person in the room. Finally, the presenters talk about completing your placement hours. Feelings of Incompetence (starts at 2.25 mins) Feelings of incompetence - also known as 'the imposter syndrome' (a term first used in 1978 by clinical psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes) - are common among trainee counsellors, in respect to both their academic work and their clinical practice. Feelings of incompetence come from how we view ourselves, and the expectations that we perceive others to have of us. They may derive from being criticised in the past, and often involve transference. It's important to try to understand and tackle feelings of incompetence, because otherwise they can distract us from being fully present with the client in the here and now - and so risk tainting the counselling relationship. Above all, try to believe that you are enough. It is OK - and human - to make mistakes. If you do say something in a session that feels wrong, then step straight in and acknowledge this, trying again and building your learning for the future. Working with a Third Person in the Room (starts at 14.36 mins) There are various different versions of the third person in the room - for example, an interpreter, a parent (if the client is a child) or a support worker. A recording device is even a type of third presence in the room. Rory refers to a research study carried out by psychotherapist Lorraine Quinn on working with interpreters in therapy. This discusses the challenges faced by counsellors when working with a third person in the room, explaining the importance of practicing in a way that is effective, ethical and culturally appropriate within the resources that are available. You can download a detailed handout on this topic here, or it is also available in the Handouts Vault and Counselling Study Resource (CSR). To Become a Qualified Counsellor you need to Complete Your Placement Hours (starts at 23.50 mins) Towards the end of the process of becoming a counsellor, many students feels the pressure of trying to complete their placement hours whilst also writing final assignments, for example for the ABC external portfolio. It can feel like a lot to get done all at the same time. Ken and Rory offer some practical tips on how to avoid the feelings of panic: Make sure you fully understand and adhere to the supervision ratios required by your awarding body, so that all your placement hours are counted. Ensure too that you are aware of your awarding body's rules on what counts as a client session (i.e. how long a session must be - sometimes the rules are different if you are counselling children and young people, who may need shorter sessions). Get your paperwork spot-on, presenting this clearly so as to avoid or explain any discrepancies. Check with your tutors and work with peers to check that you have understood correctly the forms that you must use to record your client and supervision sessions. Try not to worry if you are behind schedule to complete your hours in time - find out from your tutor how long you have after the course ends to finish. If you are delayed in completing your hours, don't delay starting your external portfolio. It is much easier to do this while you are still in college with your tutor and peers, so get as much of it done as you possibly can, and then you can add your hours in as the final stage. And why not share this your achievement with other student counsellors in our Facebook group?


    078 – Counselling Assignment Referred May 19, 2018
    Show notes

    In episode 78 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, Ken Kelly and Rory Lees-Oakes offer tips on using quotations in assignments. 'Practice Matters' looks at reasons why clients may 'disappear'. Last, the presenters discuss what it means to have an assignment referred. Using Quotations in Assignments (starts at 2.18 mins) Tutors like to see students using quotes in assignments as this shows you have read around the subject. It is a way of backing up your own experience and views. Ken and Rory offer tips on finding and using quotes: Use the index of the book as a starting point, looking up the particular concepts you are focusing on. Don't assume you understand a quote without setting it in context - look up where it has come from, and read what comes before and after. If you find quotes online, make sure they are from an authority source (e.g. Wikipedia is not a reliable source). Counselling Tutor is proud to announce a new quotes section on our website. There, we include quotes that we have checked out, and present each as an attractive graphic. Why not join the discussion on Facebook to let us know your favourite quote? Don't forget to provide the full reference too, and we might use it on our website. When Clients Never Return (starts at 10.37 mins) It can be very concerning and frustrating for counselling students when clients 'DNA' (do not attend), but there are many reasons why this happens, for example: health reasons not being able to afford to take time off work not being able to pay the travel costs to get to counselling having to care for children or other dependants not being ready for counselling feeling fear and shame moving house experiencing transference (i.e. when you remind them of someone from their past) just not having the time. For some clients, one session is enough: simply having the opportunity to offload and feeling heard can be enough. If you are faced with a DNA, try to use the time constructively - for example, you could read, make notes or go for a walk, so supporting your learning and preparing you for your next client. Also, do try to retain unconditional positive regard for the client: we never know what is going on in other people's lives. You can download a handout on this topic here, or it is also available in the Handouts Vault and Counselling Study Resource (CSR). Getting Assignments Referred (starts at 14.29 mins) Ken and Rory both experienced getting assignments referred when they started counselling training. This can bring back difficult memories of receiving 'fail' marks at school, but a referral is not a failure: it simply means that you have not fully covered what is needed to meet the particular criterion. It is usually not a reflection on your intelligence or aptitude. A referral should always give pointers on where the gap is between what you have provided and what is required, so you'll know exactly what you need to do to pass. When writing counselling assignments, the most important thing is to provide exactly what the awarding body is asking for. The first step is to understand the academic language used in the criteria. If you are a member of the CSR, you can listen to Rory's lecture, 'Cracking the Criteria', which comes with its own slide pack and links. If you are working on your external portfolio for the ABC Level 4 Diploma in Therapeutic Counselling - the final set of assignments for this popular qualification - you might find it useful to use our External Portfolio Key.


    077 – Fitness to Practice in Counselling May 12, 2018
    Show notes

    In episode 77 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, Ken Kelly and Rory Lees-Oakes discuss whether age is a barrier to starting counselling training. 'Practice Matters' then looks at working within your competence as a counsellor. Finally, the presenters talk about getting signed off as fit to practise. Age of Counselling Students (starts at 1.54 mins) Is it possible to be too old to train as a counsellor? Ken and Rory think not, and both entered the profession themselves after experience in other fields. Rory began training aged 42 with few formal qualifications, and was one of the younger members of his group. Learning is lifelong: we can always learn more, however old we are. Becoming a counsellor is a vocation, often attracting people who have come through difficult times themselves. It's more about who you are than how old you are or how academic you were when at school. Not all learners prosper in the school environment - for example, as Ken points out based on his own experience, young people with dyslexia may be seen as lazy and incapable when really it's simply that the learning style at school doesn't suit them. So if you feel drawn to counselling training, go for it! And if you'd like to discuss this topic with other actual or potential students of counselling - and some qualified counsellors and counselling tutors - do visit our Facebook group and start a conversation. Working within Your Competence (starts at 9.48 mins) Working within your competence as a counsellor is vital whether you are qualified or a student. If you don't have the right knowledge, skills and experience to help a potential client, it's important to make an ethical referral. How do counselling students know whether or not they are working within their competence? It is not at all uncommon for students - and others - to experience feelings of incompetence (FOIs). In fact, Dave Mearns and Brian Thorne write about FOIs in their book Person-Centred Counselling in Action (Sage, 2013). Rory offers some tips to help you ensure you work within your competence as a student counsellor: Make sure you choose a placement where a qualified counsellor assesses all new clients before allocating them to counsellors (considering presenting issue, risk level and modality). Get yourself a good supervisor to support you and your learning. Seek out appropriate continuing professional development, e.g. on working with bereavement and working with trauma. Be familiar with the limits to confidentiality within your agency. Ensure you understand and work within the ethical framework of your professional body (e.g. the Ethical Framework for the Counselling Professions of the British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy). Be aware of your own process, e.g. any transference within the counselling room. Don't be afraid to ask for support - doing so is neither wrong nor weak. You can download Rory's handout on working within your competence here, or it is also available in the Handouts Vault and Counselling Study Resource (CSR). Fitness-to-Practise Letters (starts at 27.07 mins) 'Fitness to practise' refers to being fit to go into practice in a placement, sit with clients there, and handle the material they bring. You are not expected to be a mature, seasoned professional at this stage. Above all, it ensures that students counsellors do no harm in placement (e.g. by providing advice to clients). Your college tutors assess whether you are fit to practise - usually by observing you in skills practice, or by listening to taped sessions with peers. When they feel you are fit to practise, they will give you a letter to show your prospective placement. Getting your fitness-to-practise letter is a real landmark in counselling training, and something to celebrate - though of course you will never stop learning! We have two articles available that might be helpful for you as you prepare to be assessed for your fitness to practise: 'First Counselling Session - Overview for Student Counsellors' 'Three-Step Blueprint to Passing Your Skills Evaluation First Time'


    076 – When to Break Confidentiality in Counselling May 05, 2018
    Show notes

    In episode 76 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, Ken Kelly and Rory Lees-Oakes discuss how to spot and work with clients' defences. 'Practice Matters' then investigates the limits to confidentiality in counselling. Finally, the presenters discuss the key principles of the person-centred approach. Working with Clients' Defences (starts at 2.20 mins) While we all know our own truth (unless our reality is altered - for example, by drugs, alcohol or psychosis), we sometimes defend ourselves from looking at this - perhaps for fear that it may be too painful or difficult. This 'block' can really feel like a brick wall. You may see this phenomenon in clients who say they want to change something, yet at the same time seem very resistant to actually doing so. It can be difficult to know how best to deal with this as a therapist: should we challenge, or should we simply wait for the client to become ready? The clue here lies in numbers 16 and 17 of Carl Rogers' 19 propositions, which Rory decodes as follows: I may find an experience threatening if it is inconsistent with how I see myself in the world. The more experiences I find threatening, the more rigid my sense of self becomes, and the more tightly I cling to my viewpoint. If I feel accepted and understood, I may be able to look at experiences I had previously denied. When there is this lack of threat, I can begin to make sense of myself. In this way, I am healing myself. In other words, providing a threat-free environment is key to enabling the client to lower their defences. Rogers provides a 'recipe' for this in the form of the six necessary and sufficient conditions of therapeutic personality change. Defences may be serving as the client's 'life raft', keeping them afloat. To deflate this could be both cruel and dangerous. The key is to be gentle, kind and patient. Limits to Confidentiality (starts at 11.58 mins) Confidentiality is key to offering a threat-free environment in the counselling room. However, confidentiality is not synonymous with secrecy, and always has its exceptions and limits, which are likely to vary between countries, with their different jurisdictions. The points here are specific to the UK. The counsellor must break confidentiality in three cases involving the law being broken: terrorism, drug trafficking and money laundering. Rory explains these areas. Strangely, there is no legal requirement currently to report child abuse, though many counsellors include this as one of their reasons to break confidentiality. Additional limits on confidentiality may be set by individual agencies; it is important to understand your agency's policy in this respect. The only people who can require the release of client notes are: a judge (with a court order) a coroner the client themselves It is important to make the limits to confidentiality clear in contracting, ideally in a written contract that is signed by both client and counsellor. Rory recommends a book by Peter Jenkins ­- Counselling, Psychotherapy and the Law (Sage, 2007). You can download Rory's handout on the limits to confidentiality here, or it is also available in the Handouts Vault and Counselling Study Resource (CSR). Key Principles of the Person-Centred Approach (starts at 27.07 mins) Ken and Rory talk about key concepts in the person-centred approach to counselling, which is based on humanistic psychology. Introjected values (implanted in us by parents or teachers when we were young - or perhaps later by a boss at work, a partner or the media) lead to conditions of worth. For example, a girl may be taught that she must dress in a 'feminine' way, while a boy might be told that 'big boys don't cry'. Later, when she feels drawn to dress in a way that she feels doesn't fit this definition, and when he is hurt and feels the tears pricking, both experience incongruence. Person-centred counsellors believe that everyone is born good (or perhaps 'ethically neutral', as Rory suggests). Counsellors in this modality aim to help clients accept themselves as they truly are: that is, to embrace their real (organismic) self, relying on their internal locus of evaluation.


    075 – Psychodynamic Approach to Counselling Apr 28, 2018
    Show notes

    In episode 75 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, Ken Kelly and Rory Lees-Oakes talk about psychodynamic theory. 'Practice Matters' then delves into transference, before the presenters discuss Abraham Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Psychodynamic Theory (starts at 1.36 mins) Psychodynamic theory was originally developed by Sigmund Freud, the father of talking therapies. This represented a move away from the traditional medical model of treating mental-health problems with medication. Freud's work was based on the idea of drive theory (i.e. looking at what drives humans). Freud proposed a tripartite model of personality - comprising the id, ego and superego - in contrast to the humanistic model of an organismic whole. He believed that sexual drives and stages were important; he saw women as very different from men, even proposing the term 'hysteria' as female-specific. Those receiving therapy were often referred to as 'patients' or 'analysands' rather than as 'clients'. Psychodynamic theory has informed other developments in psychotherapeutic theory, for example, Eric Berne's work on transactional analysis; he and Carl Jung always worked together before going their separate ways. It is in psychodynamic approaches that practitioners tend to be referred to as 'psychotherapists' rather than 'counsellors'. While counselling focuses on resolving specific issues and tends to be fairly short-term, psychotherapy (which uses the technique of psychoanalysis) is often about sorting out the client's whole life (involving bringing early memories back into the conscious mind). As such, it tends to require a much longer course of therapy. Transference (starts at 12.32 mins) The importance of transference - a subconscious reminder of a past relationship - in the counselling room can be underestimated. Rory describes an example of a student experiencing transference towards him, as he reminded her of her father. When this happens, there is a danger that the person experiencing transference discounts the other person, making assumptions about them that are based on past rather than present experience. Rory gives some pointers on clues that transference is occurring in the therapy room These include when the client becomes: angry at you childlike or coy in your company fearful (of either your physical presence or the idea that you might judge them). While these signs suggest that transference may be happening and be outside the awareness of the client, it can sometimes be overt. For example, the client might say: 'You sound just like my dad.' You can download Rory's handout on transference here, or it is also available in the Counselling Study Resource (CSR). Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs (starts at 19.03 mins) The hierarchy of needs - sometimes known as 'Maslow's pyramid' - is one of the key concepts in humanistic psychology (the third force in psychology, after psychodynamics and behaviourism. Rory explains the structure of the hierarchy, moving from physiological needs at the base to self-actualisation at the top. It is possible to move to the next level only once your needs at the lower level have been met. Abraham Maslow influenced the work of Carl Rogers, in particular in the seven stages of process (which track people's development, including clients in counselling). You'll find various resources on Maslow's hierarchy on the Counselling Tutor website (you can use our new search facility). Given that lack of prejudice is an important part of self-actualisation, you might also find it useful to refer to episode 74 of the Counselling Tutor podcast on self-concept. Awareness of self is key to moving towards self-actualisation.


    074 – Self-Concept in Counselling Apr 21, 2018
    Show notes

    In episode 74 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, Ken Kelly and Rory Lees-Oakes talk about self-concept, as written about by Carl Rogers. 'Practice Matters' examines attending. Last, the presenters discuss unconditional positive regard (UPR). Self-Concept (starts at 2.04 mins) Self-concept is an idea much discussed by both psychologists and sociologists. Carl Rogers describes his notion of self-concept in his well-known book On Becoming a Person, originally published in 1961. In his thinking on self, Rogers was influenced by Danish philosopher Søren Kierkegaard. Rogers believed that the self has three aspects: real self (who we truly are), ideal self (who we would like to be) and self-concept. The self-concept is all about how we view ourselves; it is like a lens through which we see the world. This lens - often invisible to us - may be warped by conditions of worth and introjects. This links to the idea of phenomenology - i.e. the study of subjective experience. It is really important for trainee counsellors to work on identifying and understanding their self-concept, because otherwise this invisible lens can mar the ability to offer clients the core conditions. Personal development is an important part of counselling training - for example, you will probably have personal development groups, personal therapy and exercises in increasing self-awareness (e.g. the Johari window). Attending (starts at 12.44 mins) Attending is a really important skill in counselling, which links to the core condition of UPR. Attending involves putting your client in the centre of your universe while you are working with them. It's about not only listening to them, but really hearing them. This can be an unusual experience for a client who has not known unconditional love - or who has perhaps even been rejected by others. It is important to ensure that attending happens throughout the full course of therapy. It is also important to show the client that you are attending to them. Rory offers some tips on doing this: Make appropriate eye contact, remembering that what is appropriate may vary by culture. Sit with a relaxed and comfortable posture. Lean forward towards the client. Consider moving slightly closer when the client is describing difficult material. Be aware of the client's body language and non-verbal communication. Ensure the room is both accessible to and comfortable for the client, avoiding any triggering objects. If possible, accommodate the client's wishes with regard to the counselling environment. Pay attention to the ending of therapy, planning this in advance and taking time to help map support available to the client afterwards. You can download Rory's handout on attending here, or it is also available in the Handouts Vault and Counselling Study Resource (CSR). Unconditional Positive Regard (starts at 21.25 mins) UPR is all about freeing clients from judgement: Carl Rogers used to refer to 'prizing' or 'non-possessive warmth'. This is important in all modalities, not just the person-centred approach. Ken and Rory discuss the challenges of feeling UPR towards others outside the counselling room. There are differences between the counselling relationship and the way we need to relate to others outside this context; Rory suggests that we can choose to 'adjust the volume' on how we display the core conditions, turning this up or down in different contexts as appropriate.


    073 – Metaphor in Counselling Mar 24, 2018
    Show notes

    In episode 73 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, Ken Kelly and Rory Lees-Oakes discuss the skill of active listening. 'Practice Matters' follows, in which Rory explains the Caldicott principles and how these can support ethical multidisciplinary working. Finally, the presenters discuss the use of simile and metaphor in counselling. Active Listening (starts at 2.12 mins) It was the Greek philosopher Epictetus who first pointed out that we have one mouth and two ears. In active listening, we must not just passively let the client's words wash over us, but must see every word they speak as important, paying full attention to nuances. Active listening extends to their body language too: you can pick up a lot about how a client is feeling by observing this. Active listening is not just about listening - it's also about ensuring that the client feels heard. To do this, we must also respond respectfully, for example using the skills of reflection and paraphrasing. Our own body language also helps with this - for example, we must use an open posture, make appropriate eye contact, and allow the right amount of personal space (depending on cultural norms and individual clients' preferences). It is important to listen not only to the narrative (the story), but also to the meaning behind this - that is, the emotions and themes. Carl Rogers called this 'the music beneath the words'. Minimal encouragers (e.g. 'Mmm', 'Yes', 'Aha' and 'Oh right') and facial expressions can be useful to show the client you are listening attentively, but do let these flow naturally so that they don't sound contrived. The Caldicott Principles (starts at 11.53 mins) Counsellors often work as part of a multidisciplinary team, for example in a school. This raises challenges for confidentiality. Whether we are working in a paid or voluntary post, we must be guided by the organisational policy on confidentiality and limits to this. Most importantly, you should set out and explain in your contract what the limits of confidentiality are in the particular context - in other words, reflecting what might be asked of you by other professionals. The client can then make an informed decision on whether to go ahead on this basis. The murder of eight-year-old Victoria Climbié in 2000 by her guardians illustrates why information sharing can be important: many different authorities knew parts of what was going on, but none was aware of the full picture. In 1997, the UK government commissioned a review on the use of patient information in the NHS. The committee was chaired by psychiatrist Dame Fiona Caldicott. The resulting report highlighted six key principles, with a seventh added later, in 2012: Justify the purpose of using confidential information. Don't use personal confidential information unless it is absolutely necessary. Use the minimum necessary personal confidential data. Access to personal confidential information should be on a strict need-to-know basis. Everyone with access to personal confidential information should be aware of their responsibilities. Comply with the law. The duty to share information can be as important as the duty to protect patient confidentiality. Rory explains each of these in detail in the podcast. You can also download Rory's handout on working in a multidisciplinary team here, or it is also available in the Handouts Vault and Counselling Study Resource (CSR). Working with Simile and Metaphor in Counselling (starts at 24.44 mins) Simile and metaphor are both types of imagery. While simile compares something to another thing (e.g. 'I feel like I'm riding choppy seas'), metaphor suggests that something actually is another thing (e.g. 'I have a knot in my stomach'). Many clients use imagery as a way to talk about difficult feelings using external points of reference, as it can be so painful to fully immerse oneself in emotions. When this happens, it is like they are opening a door for you, which you can then gently pass through and respectfully explore what lies within. Imagery is often culturally linked - for example, people in the UK have recently referred to 'the beast from the East' to mean the cold, snowy weather that hit the country from Siberia. We all understood what this meant, but people in other countries may not be familiar with the term. Caution therefore needs to be used if you introduce imagery yourself in the counselling room. Imagery uses a different part of the brain than does spoken language; this means it may reveal things are at the edge of the client's awareness - and thus very rich learning material. Why not try speaking to your peers about the use of simile and metaphor, listen out for how other people use imagery, and explore your own use in your journal? This will help hone your skills in engaging with language. You might also like to read work by Eugene Gendlin, who wrote on focusing - which involves examining the felt sense and images that come out of this. If you are a member of the CSR, you can listen to a lecture on working with metaphor featuring expert Jonathan Lloyd. (You need to be logged into the CSR for the above link to work)


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