Coming Out Pod

Latest Episodes:

Episode 206: Marginalized Mormon Stories with Kerry Spencer Pray and Jenn Lee Smith Jul 06, 2022

Show notes

Kerry Spencer Pray and Jenn Lee Smith met in Affirmation, an organization for LGBTQIA+ Mormons. Kerry had just realized that she was queer; Jenn had been out for longer, but as an Asian-American, she was struggling with the overwhelming whiteness (not to mention maleness) of the only available queer Mormon spaces. Jenn and Kerry clicked immediately as friends, and Jenn pitched the idea for what would eventually become "I Spoke to You with Silence: Essays from Queer Mormons of Marginalized Genders" (which just sold out during its first week on Amazon!). Kerry and Jenn share the different trajectories their lives have taken since coming out, and we discuss the beauty and freedom of unconventional relationship structures. Plus, Lauren does a live reading of an essay from the book THAT SHE HERSELF IS FEATURED IN! Umm...#FOUNDLAUREN?!
Follow Kerry on Twitter at @swilua and on Instagram at @swilua_, and keep up with Jenn on Instagram via @bewilderfilm (or connect with her on Facebook)! You can purchase "I Spoke to You with Silence" at https://uofupress.lib.utah.edu/i-spoke-to-you-with-silence/ or at your local bookstore (or, yes, FINE; also on Amazon). And find links below to a bunch of the things we discussed during the episode!
Queer Mormon Witches: https://www.qmwproject.com
"Sexual Fluidity: Understanding Women's Love and Desire" by Lisa M. Diamond: https://www.amazon.com/Sexual-Fluidity-Understanding-Womens-Desire/dp/0674032268
"The Dilemma of Desire" (feat. Lisa M. Diamond): https://www.sho.com/titles/3509856/the-dilemma-of-desire
Jenn's short film "Faithful": https://vimeo.com/ondemand/faithfulmormonfilm

Episode 205: Linda Riley Jun 29, 2022

Show notes

We're capping off a fantastic Pride Month with the publisher of DIVA, the world's largest LGBTQIA+ magazine for female-identifying and non-binary people! DIVA has been around since 1994, but Linda Riley became the title's first ever lesbian owner in 2015. She shares the story of how she came out to her mother at fifteen and was offered the choice of "psychiatry" (aka electroshock therapy), or leaving home. Linda promptly left home and school, and what followed were years of her finding and building her queer community; not only in her native London, but also in San Francisco during the AIDS crisis. She describes how activism was intertwined with queer social life in the '80s, and how she ultimately ended up in the magazine industry. Plus, Linda talks trans allyship, founding Lesbian Visibility Week, and her Twitter beef with JK Rowling!
Follow DIVA on Twitter and Instagram at @divamagazine, and follow Linda individually on Instagram at @diversityriley, and on Twitter at @lindariley8 (where you can help her fight any future Twitter battles!). Also, as Linda mentioned, DIVA will soon be changing over to a new URL, but for now, check them out and subscribe at https://divamag.co.uk/!

Episode 204: Erica Luttrell Jun 22, 2022

Show notes

We have a *hilarious* conversation with actor Erica Luttrell (Lost Girl; Salvation; Mayans M.C.), who voices lesbian icon Sapphire on Steven Universe! Back when she was younger, Erica made a point of differentiating between her platonic female crushes (Gillian Anderson) and her non-platonic male crushes (you will genuinely never guess who). But the formative experience of seeing Shakespeare in Love brought up some feelings she could no longer ignore, and kicked off a five-ish year internal struggle with her sexuality. Erica reads some GLORIOUS journal entries from that time in her life, and discusses how she eventually grew to identify as "homoromantic demi-pansexual" (but also just "gay"). Plus, she shares how she *still* gets cast almost exclusively in make-out-with-a-dude roles, even after publicly coming out! WHAT'S IT GONNA TAKE, HOLLYWOOD?!?
Follow Erica everywhere at @shukrani.

Episode 203: Edafe Okporo Jun 15, 2022

Show notes

Activist and author Edafe Okporo ("Asylum: A Memoir & Manifesto") is a truly incredible human being. Born and raised in Nigeria when homosexuality was heavily condemned (but not yet criminalized), Edafe hid his sexuality by joining the ministry in college. Though he eventually left to become an activist and work at an HIV/AIDS clinic, everything changed in 2014 when homosexuality was made illegal in his country. Edafe details the harrowing story of how he was attacked by a mob and subsequently fled Nigeria...only to land in a U.S. detention center for months on end as a refugee. He describes the emotional whiplash he experienced going from life-threatening trauma to suddenly having to be "fabulously gay in New York," and how therapy has helped him on that journey. Today, Edafe is THRIVING, and it was an utter joy to talk to him!
Follow Edafe everywhere at @edafeokporo. Also, check out his beautiful website (and order his BOOK!) at https://www.edafeokporo.com/.

Episode 202: Victoria Albina Jun 08, 2022

Show notes

A Functional Medicine Nurse Practitioner! A Certified Breathwork Meditation Guide! A self-identified "Deep Lez!" Victoria Albina (she/they; Feminist Wellness podcast) was born in Argentina, but by her early teens, her family had immigrated to the greatest state in the union (Rhode Island), and she was secretly attending a "tiny homo support group." Victoria shares how her queer Latina origins led her to the healing work she does with other marginalized folks, and how the #positivevibesonly movement is actually *detrimental* to our mental health. She also leads us in two simple somatic exercises in real time, and we introduce Nicole to the *life-changing* k.d. lang/Cindy Crawford Vanity Fair cover from 1993! Do we keep erroneously referring to it as a Rolling Stone cover from 1992? LOOK, WE WERE FLUSTERED, OKAY??
Victoria gives good gram at @victoriaalbinawellness, and you can listen to Feminist Wellness wherever you get your pods. Also, make sure you go to http://www.victoriaalbina.com/comingout to check out the FREE suite of meditations and exercises Victoria created just for our listeners!

Episode 201: Jay Toole (a.k.a. Super Butch) Jun 01, 2022

Show notes

It's officially Pride Month, and we're kicking things off with an UN-F$@#!NG-BELIEVABLE guest!! At thirteen years old, Jay Toole (known to all as Super Butch) came home with a flat top hair cut, and was promptly kicked out for good. Jay headed straight for the West Village, and before long, she was taken in by a community of homeless queer kids in Washington Square Park. What followed was over twenty-five years of living on the street, and some of the most amazing stories we have EVER heard on the podcast! It's impossible to do justice to this episode in a blurb, but among other things, Jay discusses the stints she did at the famed Women's House of Detention, and her experience AT THE STONEWALL RIOTS!!! Jay is an indispensable (and *hilarious*) resource for our community, and we cannot emphasize enough what an honor it was to talk to her. Happy Pride, everybody!
(TW: passing mentions of sexual assault, but nothing descriptive)
You can honest-to-God contact Jay at the number she gave out in this episode! She's also on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/Superbutch, and her website is https://www.jaytoole.com/.

Episode 200: Sarah-Cate May 25, 2022

Show notes

Get ready to FEAST YOUR EARS on the Southern drawl of public speaker, advocate, and Lesflicks writer, Sarah-Cate! From living alone by age nine, to bouncing around group homes through her teens, to years spent unhoused as a young adult, Sarah-Cate's story is equal parts devastating and deeply inspiring. And despite living her entire life in very conservative parts of Texas, Sarah-Cate always, *always* made the choice to be out as queer. She explains how she went from life as a homeless young person with zero queer people in her orbit, to managing Lesflicks' Community Amplification Network, traveling the country to advocate for positive representation, and working with LGBTQ youth organizations. Also, Sarah-Cate identifies as aromantic and says she's "not a monogamous creature," and we get all the deets!
We've got a whole bunch of stuff for you this episode! Follow Sarah-Cate on Instagram at @s.c.peregrine, and at her *new* Twitter handle (not the one she gives in the ep!), @sarahcaitlin. Read her work at https://www.lesflicks.com/, and check out the Community Amplification Network she manages at https://audience.lesflicks.com/c/hello! Also, the Texas LGBTQ youth org that Sarah-Cate mentioned is https://www.lgbtqsaves.org/. They're located in Fort Worth, but also do things virtually! Lastly, check out Sarah-Cate's fan site, Fleet of Fandoms, on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/FleetofFandoms!

Episode 199: Queer Relationship Coach Liana Griebsch May 18, 2022

Show notes

Not only is queer relationship coach Liana Griebsch an absolute joy, she is also one of the most SELF-AWARE people we've encountered! By the end of high school, straight-A-rule-follower Liana had already cleared the massive hurdles of accepting her gayness, and coming out to her Mexican Catholic mother. But a series of unsatisfying partnerships in college ultimately led her to a bold declaration: "I'm not entering into any relationship until I actually understand [how to do] this." And thus, a Queer Love and Relationship Coach was BORN! This episode is so valuable for both those in relationships *and* those struggling with being single. Nicole asks about limiting beliefs for ethically non-monogamous folks! Lauren asks about being alone! Liana gives us tools to help us be gentle with ourselves! It's an enlightening and uplifting conversation.
Follow Liana on Instagram at @lianagriebsch, and check out her incredibly comprehensive website at https://lianagriebsch.com/!

Episode 198: Abe Farrelly, REDUX! May 11, 2022

Show notes

Strap in and strap-on for this VERY HORNY EPISODE!! Unflinchingly-authentic comedian and actor Abe Farrelly (Curb Your Enthusiasm; Netflix Is A Joke Fest) is back as our first ever post-transition guest! Abe discusses how his standup - which used to lean heavily on the butch lesbian jokes - was "a big tell" when it came to realizing he needed to transition, and how he sees comedy as an opportunity to educate audiences without lecturing them. He also shares the beautiful ways in which his parents have adjusted to his new identity, and how his 89-year-old, Catholic Mass-attending grandmother has become his biggest supporter! Plus, Abe reveals all of the surprising changes he has gone through since starting testosterone (spoiler alert: no tree stump is safe, and Rob Lowe is the only person who can make him cry).
Follow Abe on Instagram at @abfarrelly, and on TikTok at @abefarrelly!

Episode 197: Lisa Cordileone May 04, 2022

Show notes

Actor, writer, and VO artist Lisa Cordileone heard "no" so many times that it prompted her to create her own work, which led to the lesbian web series Easy Abby and the feature Freelancers Anonymous! But while Lisa's queer life away from home was thriving, the time she spent with her family back in North Carolina was radically different. Lisa gets candid about her lifelong journey with shame, and how it was impacted by the fact that her parents took a long time to come around. She also spills her plans to create "a Marvel Universe for women in STEM," and we go on a Queer Elder (TM) mini-rant about how WE HAVE TO KNOW OUR HISTORY!!!
Follow Lisa on Instagram at @lisa.cordileone, and watch Easy Abby at https://watch.revry.tv/details/30205 and Freelancers Anonymous at https://www.freelancersanonymousmovie.com/!

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