Bare Marriage

Latest Episodes:

Episode 291: How Professor Neil Reaches Young Men Stuck in Misogyny Aug 14, 2025

Show notes

Sheila Wray Gregoire interviews Professor Neil, a popular social media creator who critiques toxic masculinity and problematic topics he finds in the manosphere. They discuss how certain Christian pastors and influencers spread harmful messages about gender roles, sex, and marriage that mirror incel ideology. Through reviewing harmful clips from pastors Josh Howerton & Josh McPherson, professor Neil shares his approach to changing minds through facts and research.

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Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
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FIND PROFESSOR NEIL:

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 290: What Does Authoritarianism Have to Do with Complementarianism? (with a test!) Aug 07, 2025

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How do we reach people still in evangelicalism about toxic teachings? I read an amazing book called On Authoritarians by Bob Altemeyer which talks about how people get to be authoritarian, and the nature of authoritarians. And then shows (horrifyingly) how evangelicalism overlaps with authoritarianism! These insights can actually help us learn how to reach people still wading in toxic teachings!

TO SUPPORT US:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
Join our email list!

BOOKS MENTIONED:

The free book The Authoritarians (includes the quizzes you can take to see where you score!)
She Deserves Better
The Good Girl's/Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex (great for bridal showers!)

OTHER LINKS MENTIONED:

Podcast with Terran Williams
Podcast with Marg Mowczko
Our toolkit to use to talk to friends/pastors about our findings

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 289: Why Fiction Makes You a Better Person (Why We Don't Hate ALL Books!) Jun 26, 2025

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In this season finale of the Bare Marriage Podcast, Rebecca, Joanna, Connor, and Josiah discuss the powerful benefits of reading fiction for personal growth, empathy development, and critical thinking. They share their personal journeys back to reading after University & adult life interrupted their childhood love of books, explore scientific research on how fiction affects the brain, and provide practical advice for getting back into reading. The episode concludes with an inspiring poem about women's value and calling by Porsche Vu (The Poetic Activist).

BECOME ONE OF OUR MONTHLY DONORS:

We're aiming for 50 new monthly donors, for even as little as $10 a month! For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation

KEEP UP WITH SHEILA THIS SUMMER:

Join my Substack! It's free.

TO SUPPORT US:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

Porsche Veu on Instagram (The Poetic Activist), and her reel

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 288: Is Sex a Want or a Need? Jun 19, 2025

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Is sex is a human need within marriage? Let's address the tension between those who see "need" language as potentially coercive and those who feel legitimate sexual desires shouldn't be shamed. Psychological research does classify sex as a human need, but the real issue is how couples can co-create a reality for a mutually satisfying sexual relationship. Rather than pressuring reluctant partners, couples should focus on building marriages where both people genuinely want and enjoy sexual intimacy.

BECOME ONE OF OUR MONTHLY DONORS:

We're aiming for 50 new monthly donors, for even as little as $10 a month! For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation

KEEP UP WITH SHEILA THIS SUMMER:

Join my Substack! It's free.

TO SUPPORT US:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

"Diamonds are forever and other fairytales" study from 2015
Podcast with Beth Allison Barr and Miranda Zapor Cruz that debunked the father influence statistic
Check out our Orgasm course and our Boost Your Libido course
Download our 12-point rubric and scorecard for healthy sexuality

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 287: What is “Headship” in Ephesians 5 and 1 Corinthians 11? Feat. Marg Mowczko Jun 12, 2025

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In this episode of the Bare Marriage Podcast, I am talking with Biblical Greek scholar Marg Mowczko about the true meaning of "headship" in the Bible. Marg reveals that the Greek word "kephale" (head) doesn't typically mean "leader" or "authority" in ancient literature, and that no verse actually commands men to lead their wives. Instead, head-body metaphors are used in Scripture to describe unity and mutual care and as a picture of growing into the likeness of Christ for ALL Christians. Together, Marg and I talk about the Biblical evidence of Paul's support for women in ministry roles. We also take a moment to discuss the best Bible versions for more accurate translation in key passages about submission and hierarchy.

TO SUPPORT US:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED

Marg’s website
Marg’s patreon
Marg’s blog post on the best Bible version
Everything on 1 Corinthians 11
Everything on Ephesians 5

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 286: Our Best Christian Dating Advice--that you've all been asking for! Jun 05, 2025

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After a recent social media AMA, we noticed a ton of you wanted us to tackle dating - red flags, green flags, how to choose a great partner. Rebecca and I have been avoiding this topic since we both married young and have limited adult dating experience, but we DO have evidence-based research to share. We're addressing why we need to stop telling singles "God is just teaching you patience" (it's a numbers game!), the "Burn the Haystack Method" for online dating, why some might need to relocate for better options, and the hard truths about red flags versus settling. Fair warning: we're going to make some people uncomfortable, but if you want research-backed advice over platitudes, this episode's for you.

TO SUPPORT US:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED

Dr Jennie Young & The Burned Haystack Method
Our podcast on why Evangelical Women aren't marrying evangelical men
Join my Substack to keep up with us while the blog is on hiatus for June and July

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 285: Are Soul Ties Real? Overcoming a Purity Culture Teaching May 29, 2025

Show notes

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“Soul ties” refers to the belief that when you have sex with someone, you are now joined in the spiritual realm, and that “tie” impedes your ability to ever experience freedom if you marry someone else. Often people claim you have to go through a specific prayer to break the tie, or an exorcism. But is this idea biblical? And does it help or hurt? Today Joanna Sawatsky shares our results of believing in soul ties, and we discuss different ways to talk about heartache and trauma.

PRODUCT HIGHLIGHT:

Our puberty course The Whole Story
Join my Substack!

TO SUPPORT US:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED

Our book She Deserves Better
My series on Soul Ties
John Eldredge’s Podcast series on Soul Ties
Lisa Bevere Reel with misinformation
The domestic violence website with steps from breaking trauma bonds

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 284: The Problems with the Book His Needs, Her Needs by Willard Harley May 22, 2025

Show notes

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Let's take a close look at the book His Needs, Her Needs by Willard Harley! Bethany Jantzi and Ngina Otiende join me to look at some of the things that we find problematic about the book--and explain why evangelicalism needs better resources!

RESOURCES:

Get our one-sheet download on His Needs, Her Needs

TO SUPPORT US:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
Join our email list!

LINKS

Find Ngina Otiende on Facebook, Instagram, and at her website Intentional Today
Find Bethany Jantzi on Instagram and at her website Free from Control
Check out our newest book The Marriage You Want, with stats about what really builds intimacy
Download our rubric on how His Needs, Her Needs (and other books!) scored on sex

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 283: When the Church Stole Your Sex Life May 15, 2025

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What happens when church doesn’t seem safe? Or when, in retrospect, you realize it wasn’t, even if you threw yourself into it at the time? Today Dr. Andrew Bauman joins us to talk about his new book Safe Church, and then Rebecca and Sheila read reader’s stories about how the church stole their sex lives—and what we can do about it.

TO SUPPORT US:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
Join our email list!

LINKS

Andrew Bauman’s book Safe Church
Andrew Bauman on Facebook
Andrew’s guest post on Safe Church
Courses:
- Our Puberty Course (The Whole Story)
- Our Orgasm Course
- Our Libido Course
My blog series on sexual recovery
Our book The Great Sex Rescue
Our book She Deserves Better
Our Good Girl’s/Good Guy’s Guides to Great Sex (great for engaged couples)

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 282: What Makes Men Cheat? New Research Spotlight May 08, 2025

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It's time to walk through some super interesting studies that have recently been published--and see what they say about the intersection of infidelity and beliefs in male hierarchy. Keith joins Sheila to react to the studies!

OUR SPONSOR:

Thank you to our sponsor, Zondervan and the book Saving Face. The church needs to get away from harmful tropes, and call us towards true community based on vulnerability and safety. Aimee Byrd points the way!

TO SUPPORT US:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

The Marriage You Want
Study on how affairs aren't linked to sex frequency, and the post about it
Study on how sexism affects infidelity
Power to Flirt Study
Differences in Solitary vs. Dyadic Sexual Desire study
Study on Heroism by Gender
The IFS World Map 2019 (abuse stats are on pp. 35&36)
John Piper on how complementarianism protects women, and Rachel Held Evans' response

OTHER RESEARCH DEEP DIVE PODCASTS:

Pink and Blue Brains? What the research says about gender and brain differences
Why Sex Is Like Chef Boyardee
New Research on Obligation Sex
New Research on Ogling and Dressing for Attention

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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