Bare Marriage

Latest Episodes:

Episode 241: Both Hurt and Healed by the Church Jul 11, 2024

Show notes

What if the church hurt you terribly? Can you still heal? Today Ryan George joins us to talk about how his fundamentalist family covers up his father’s sexual abuse of others—and how Ryan eventually learned the truth and turned his father in. And then Ryan deconstructed so much of what he had been taught—and found the real Jesus. Join us as Ryan George talks about his book Hurt and Healed by the Church.

About Ryan's Book

Ryan’s book Hurt and Healed by the Church
Find all of Ryan's books

To Support Us:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 240: Breaking Away from Christian Patriarchy (feat. Cait West) plus Why People Deconstruct Jul 04, 2024

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What happens when your family gets sucked into fundamentalism, and your father insists on controlling your life, including who you will marry? You grow up under Christian patriarchy, and you experience serious emotional abuse. Today Cait West joins us to talk about her absolutely beautiful memoir Rift, about how and why she had to break free. Then Keith and I talk about why people are deconstructing, and why it’s so desperately important to listen to stories like Cait’s.
About Cait West:

Find Cait’s book Rift
Find Cait on Twitter and Threads

To Support Us:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

Our post on 8 things to know about deconstruction
Our book The Great Sex Rescue
The Great Sex Rescue Toolkit to help people understand why certain teachings hurt people

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 239: Who Are Exvangelicals? feat. Sarah McCammon Jun 27, 2024

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People who deconstruct are often accused of never believing in the first place, or of just wanting to sin. But those who deconstruct are often those who have been hurt the most by toxic teachings. Today Sarah McCammon joins us to talk about who are “ex-vangelicals”, and her own story of deconstruction. And then Keith and I talk about what it means to create a safe and just community that honors people’s fears, betrayals, and concerns.
About Sarah McCammon:

Find Sarah's book The Exvangelicals on Amazon
Follow Sarah on Substack

To Support Us:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in this Podcast:

Our book She Deserves Better
The Great Sex Rescue Toolkit to help people understand why certain teachings hurt people
Marg Mowczko's site analyzing the biblical passages pertaining to women
The saga of Robert Morris’ abuse, from Dee at Wartburg Watch who broke the story
Larry Linn’s Twitter thread about righteousness

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 238: The Problems with Lies Young Women Believe by Dannah Gresh and Nancy Wolgemuth Jun 20, 2024

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Why is a frequenty-used book in teen girls' Bible studies focusing on Satan and not Jesus?
A deep dive into the book Lies Young Women Believe by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth and Dannah Gresh. Let's see what is being taught to teen girls--and why it's so problematic. We can do better, church!
Get our Downloadable One Sheet of the problems with the book Lies Young Women Believe:
Thanks to our sponsor, the book The Sex Talk You Never Got by Sam Jolman

And listen to our interview with Sam about the book!

To Support Us:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in this Podcast:

Our podcasts about the book Lies Women Believe: Part 1 and its treatment of abuse and Part 2 and its portrayal of God
Our downloadable onesheet about Lies Women Believe
Our book She Deserves Better
Our podcast going over the problems with how Dannah Gresh teaches about modesty
Why do women support modesty messages?
Dannah Gresh's submission quiz

About Johnna Harris

Follow her on Instagram and X, and find her podcast Bodies Behind the Bus

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 237: Do We Have to Frame All Dads as Heroes? Jun 13, 2024

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Every Father’s Day, there’s a rallying cry in many conservative evangelical spaces that men are losing out and fathers are under attack. Where’s the truth in this? And what are the problems with talking about marriage like this? Plus we rewrite Harrison Butker’s commencement speech!
Thanks to our sponsor, the book The Sex Talk You Never Got by Sam Jolman

And listen to our interview with Sam about the book!

To Support Us:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in this Podcast:

Focus on the Family Broadcast, Finding the Hero in Your Husband (Part 1)
Harrison Butker Speech and Transcript
Our Bare Marriage podcast on the idea that women talk too much (put forward by Focus on the Family under James Dobson)
My post from last Father’s Day about framing your husband as the hero

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 236: The Sex Talk You Never Got with Sam Jolman Jun 06, 2024

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What if purity culture didn’t just steal sexual health from women, but stole it from men too? What does it mean for a man to have healthy sexuality? Today licensed counselor Sam Jolman joins us for The Sex Talk You Never Got.
To Support Us:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

The Sex Talk You Never Got by Sam Jolman: https://amzn.to/4aRrShp

Find Sam on Instagram

The Boost Your Libido Course: https://baremarriage.com/boost-libido-course/

All about New River Fellowship Church:

Pastor Joey Willis, Lead Pastor at New River Fellowship in Hudson Oaks, Texas.

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 235: Wolves, Chimpanzees, and Deer: Let’s confront the Alpha Male Myth May 02, 2024

Show notes

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Evangelical conservatives too often portray masculinity as if men are supposed to be the “Alpha male”—aloof, emotionless, vying for control, and bullying. Today we look at how, even in nature, this concept of the Alpha Male has been overblown. And we present a better picture.
To Support Us:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things mentioned in the podcast:

All about New River Fellowship Church

Pastor Joey Willis, Lead Pastor at New River Fellowship in Hudson Oaks, Texas.

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 234: Pastors’ Wives Spill the Tea on Church Life—and the search for authenticity and friendship Apr 25, 2024

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Church is messy. Friendships are hard to find. Life in a fishbowl is awkward. But what if…it’s worth it? Such a great convo with Stephanie, Jessica, and Jenna about their new book Pastors’ Wives Tell All!
Whether you're a pastors' wife, or a female pastor yourself, living life in a fishbowl can be hard. We talk about parenting, marriage, and finding friends when you're in church ministry.

Things mentioned in the Podcast:

Pastors’ Wives Tell All: Pre-order Here

Get Your Preorder Bonuses

Find out everything that’s happening at their website

Follow Pastors’ Wives Tell All on Instagram

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 233: The Backlash from Those Defending Purity Culture feat. Zachary Wagner Apr 18, 2024

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With the release of so many books critiquing purity culture, what has the backlash been like? Well, let’s talk about it with Zachary Wagner, the author of Non-Toxic Masculinity as we celebrate the one-year anniversary of the launch of She Deserves Better.
To Support Us:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

About Zachary Wagner:

Find Zachary's book Non-Toxic Masculinity
Find Zachary on Instagram

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

Our book She Deserves Better!
Zachary's response to the review from Shane Morris on The Gospel Coalition
Bob and Dannah Gresh's appearance at Cedarville University
Information about Dannah calling 8-year-old's bellies intoxicating
Fred Stoeker's appearance on Focus on the Family
Matthew West's podcast discussing Modest is Hottest

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Episode 232: When Submission "Cults" Groom for Abuse: One Woman's Story Apr 11, 2024

Show notes

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We've got such a compelling interview with Lauren Rose from Called to Peace Ministries. She's telling her story--and it's a mesmerizing one--of what happened as her family got more and more into the Bill Gothard movement (and she was eventually one of the ones he allegedly abused, and was part of the lawsuit).
But when you grow up feeling like your main role is to submit, are you even able to recognize abuse?
Lauren tells her story of being in an abusive marriage, and how she eventually realized something was wrong and came out of it.
(Also: at the beginning I quoted a Bible passage and said Matthew 18. I meant Matthew 15. Sorry!)
Our Sponsor:
The Kingdom Girls NIV Bible. Meet the women in God's story! Designed for girls, but honestly--it's awesome for every woman! And it makes a great Easter gift. The Bible includes beautiful photos and write-ups on every woman who is mentioned in Scripture. Finally, a Bible that highlights God's story for women.
View a sample of the Bible here!
To Support Us:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

About Lauren Rose and Called to Peace:

Called to Peace Ministries
Find Called to Peace on Facebook, including my interview on how Sexual Coercion is Domestic Abuse

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

Our podcast with another Gothard Survivor, Emily Elizabeth
Our interview with Alyssa Wakefield, who grew up in a Gothard home and was groomed for abuse (Part 1, and Part 2).
Our podcast episode 229 with Jay Stringer about Josh Howerton's wedding night advice
My Twitter thread about Josh Howerton's "apology"
The original thread that went viral, as well as a viral follow-up dealing with Josh's comments

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!
Check out her books:

The Great Sex Rescue
She Deserves Better
The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!
Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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