Your Parenting Long Game

Latest Episodes:

Episode 313: Plugging an "Influence Leak" - Lack of Predictability Jun 06, 2024

Show notes

As parents, we want to be able to influence our children. And we can feel helpless and out of control when we try to help our kids feel or act better… and we can't make it happen.

One of the most common ways that we "leak" influence happens on a day-to-day basis in the way we ask our kids to do things and in the way we respond to their requests.

Once you become aware of this leak, you can make a simple change and increase your influence immediately!

In this episode, you'll learn:

Why some of our our requests and our responses immediately put our kids into fight-or-flight (and make them more resistant to us)
An example that illustrates what this is like for your child that you will be able to relate to
Simple strategies to increase your influence and improve your relationship with your child

FREE ASSESSMENT + 30-MINUTE CALL WITH RACHEL: https://rachel-bailey.com/call

Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/191

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 312: Plugging an "Influence Leak" - Recognizing Your Expectations May 23, 2024

Show notes

As parents, we want to be able to motivate our kids to act more responsible and handle situations more effectively. And we can feel helpless and out of control when we aren't able to make that happen.

Unfortunately, we will feel helpless and out of control because we often (unknowingly) "leak" influence by the way we think about and respond to situations. One of the most common influence leaks happens when we set unrealistic expectations and aren't even aware that we're doing that.

In this episode, you'll learn:

How setting realistic expectations increases our influence with our children
A simple question that will help you set expectations and handle previously-difficult situations more effectively
The benefits (for us and our kids!) when we plug influence leaks

FREE ASSESSMENT + 30-MINUTE CALL WITH RACHEL: https://rachel-bailey.com/call

Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/190

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 311: A Simplified Roadmap to Peace, Resilience, and Confidence (Step 2 of 2) May 16, 2024

Show notes

We want to be able to influence our kids. We want them to listen to us, and we want to be able to calm them down so they can work through situations with less drama. So it can be challenging when our attempts to influence them don't work… or even make things worse! In this second episode of a two-part series, we'll discuss what's needed to become a powerful positive influence with your children so you can bring more peace to your home, even if that seems impossible now.

In this episode, you'll learn:

The type of influence we usually have with our children – and why it doesn't motivate better behavior, moods, and attitudes
The two qualities that you need if you want your children to listen more readily and calm down more easily
What it looks like when you do improve your influence (even if your children don't realize it's happened)

--- FREE ASSESSMENT + 30-MINUTE CALL WITH RACHEL: https://rachel-bailey.com/call

Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/189

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/rachel

Episode 310: A Simplified Roadmap to Peace, Resilience, and Confidence (Step 1 of 2) May 09, 2024

Show notes

Most of us crave more calm in our homes. But what do we do when there is drama on an almost-daily basis and nothing we try makes a difference in our child's behavior? Is it possible to reduce the drama and feel more confident in our parenting without damaging our relationship with our children? The good news is you can bring more peace to your family while increasing your children's resilience and self-esteem.

In this episode, you'll learn:

Why our current parenting strategies don't change behavior, moods, or attitudes
The differences between Band Aid Parenting and Long Game Parenting
What our kids really need from us when they're struggling (and the long-term benefits of meeting their needs rather than addressing negative behavior with punishments and rewards)

Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/188

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

Episode 309: Using Yuck Dumps for Kids to Improve Behaviors, Moods, Attitudes Apr 25, 2024

Show notes

It's natural to want our kids' negative behaviors, moods, and behaviors to stop. But what happens when nothing we do seems to end the drama? How can we break out of the cycles of negativity?

In this episode, you'll learn:

Why "quick fix" methods don't help our kids feel better (and often make things worse)
Why Yuck Dumps are NOT the same as wallowing, and how these Dumps actually build resilience
Simple ways to help children release their negativity and frustration

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Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/187

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

Live "make your plan" sessions: https://rachel-bailey.com/training/

Episode 308: How to Stop Using Willpower to Try to Stay Calm (When You're Actually Upset With Your Kids) Apr 11, 2024

Show notes

We know it's better to stay calm when our children have big feelings, but it seems like some days, we can only hold on for so long when they are complaining, crying, or melting down. How can we help our kids handle their discomfort when their behavior triggers our own Yuck?

In this episode, you'll learn:

Why we need to set realistic expectations for our children
What it looks like when we're using willpower to stay calm (and why willpower never seems to last long enough)
How to shift from artificial calm to genuine emotional regulation

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Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/186

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

"Make Your Long Game Plan" live sessions: https://rachel-bailey.com/training/

Episode 307: Why You're Not A Failure (What's Really Going On Instead) Apr 04, 2024

Show notes

Most of us have an idea of how we'd like to interact with our kids. But often when we're tired or frustrated, we don't react in a way that feels good. And when situations with our kids frequently spiral out of control, it's natural to feel like we are failing at parenting!

In this episode, you'll learn:

Tips that will help any time you feel like a failure
One mindset shift that can reduce guilt immediately
How simple steps we take can positively impact our kids

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Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/185

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

Episode 306: When Your Child Gets Upset When Others Are Upset Mar 28, 2024

Show notes

We talk a lot about BIG reactions when our kids have big feelings, but what about quiet, sensitive children who struggle when other people around them are upset? Often these children will do anything they can in order to make others feel better. To keep the peace, they will also disregard their own needs – even when we encourage them to stand up for themselves!

In this episode, you'll learn:

Why many parenting strategies don't work with our sensitive children (and may even make things worse)
How to help our kids deal with discomfort -- without hurting their self-esteem
How we can help "sensitive" children become confident, resilient kids who know how to advocate for themselves in difficult situations

Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/184

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

Episode 305: You'll Lose Your Cool Less Often When You Do This Mar 21, 2024

Show notes

When we're raising kids with big feelings, it can be hard to stay emotionally regulated all of the time. How can we be the parent we want to be when it's hard not to lose our cool? How can we teach our kids how to stay calm when we're struggling with staying calm ourselves?

In this episode, you'll learn:

Why we get stuck in a "cycle of Yuck" (and feel guilty and ashamed)
How your ability to regulate yourself impacts your influence with your child
A simple tool you can use in the moment to get unstuck - even when your children are complaining or melting down

Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/183

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

Free training for parents with kids with big emotions: https://rachel-bailey.com/longgame/

Episode 304: When Family Members Get Caught In Negative Cycles Mar 07, 2024

Show notes

We want our days to be filled with peace and connection, but those of us raising kids with big emotions know that's not always the reality. Even when we try hard to fix the arguing, complaining, and general resistance to our requests, it can feel like nothing reduces the drama long-term -- and sometimes, it seems like our efforts are actually making things worse.

In this episode, you'll learn:

Why some of your current parenting strategies may not be working, despite your best efforts
The real reasons behind seemingly-unbreakable cycles -- and what to do about it!
The lifelong benefits (for us and our kids) of breaking negative cycles for good

Notes from this episode: https://rachelbailey68580.activehosted.com/f/182

Free coaching calls: https://rachel-bailey.com/coaching/

Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/RachelBailey

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