WARRIOR WEEK

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HALL PASS TO HELL | Warrior Week: Parables From the Pit | EP 064 Jun 09, 2019

Show notes

Warrior Week 52 graduate, Mick Olinik, is Sam's special guest in this episode of Warrior Week: Parables From the Pit. Today's conversation reveals their spiritual journeys and how mathematics plays a part in one's spiritual connection. We also discover how it is possible for a man to be excommunicated before he is even born, and the significance of Pink Floyd in Mick's life.

Parable #1: Warrior Wealth

Mick's intro to Warrior came via one of Garrett White's podcasts, which at the time he was discontinuing but Mick found them so interesting that he continued playing past episodes. Mick eventually stepped through the gates of Warrior in early June of 2018 through one of the live events, Warrior Wealth, with the belief he would come away with some tax strategies.
"The experience of Warrior Wealth was like a wet fish-slap in the face. It was insane." The two pivotal messages Mick received centered around the evolution of the man's role in society throughout history, as well as the conversation of the Core 4 (BODY, BEING, BALANCE, BUSINESS), specifically in the area of BEING through a powerful mediation led by Coach Sam.

QUESTION

Where in your world have you been drawn to a certain conversation or message that resulted in making what you now recognize as a life-altering decision?

Parable #2: Excommunication

Mick was essentially excommunicated (twice) from his religion before he was even born due to the actions of his grandfather in the 1940s, and his parents' actions before his birth. Mick was told by church leaders that because he was excommunicated, he was going to hell.
"This made the acceptance of spirituality and God really hard for me as a kid. Essentially, it wouldn't matter what I did; according to the leaders, I was fucked." While preparing for his Holy Communion in the second grade, and after many conversations with the priests, Mick said fuck it to religion and turned to atheism.

QUESTION

How have the religious beliefs and practices of your childhood shaped your current beliefs?

Parable #3: The Marriage of Science and Spirituality

Through the years, Mick's desire to rectify this whole BEING conversation led him to delve deep into the study of many different philosophies. By the time he walked into Warrior Wealth at the age of 41, he basically had a fuck-you attitude toward anything remotely associated with the spiritual realm.
Coach Sam: "There is a science behind spirituality. What happened in that room at Warrior Wealth during that Meditation was a mathematical formula that I can fucking explain, that created that moment of stillness. Where we were IN that moment of stillness, I cannot tell you…that's where faith comes in."

QUESTION

What has been your spiritual journey throughout your life?

Parable #4: I'm Not Worthy

There are so many man-made rules inside of all religions that have men and women believing that in order to be deemed worthy, they must complete a check-list. Even then, many are in a constant state of questioning their worthiness.
Coach Sam: "The truth is, we are all worthy when it comes to BEING as long as we are clear about the relationship we have with ourselves and the higher source we are seeking. The problems begin when a man starts to come in between you and God… and when we start idolizing men."

QUESTION

Where are you in this conversation of worthiness?

Parable #5: Wandering Generality vs Certainty

Coach Sam: When you are certain, you're a fucking lion, not a sheepdog. You're not waiting to protect; you're a fucking lion and are going to go in the hallway and eat that mother fucker.
Mick: Where I was a year ago is almost laughable. Today, I am fucking certain about who I am and where the fuck I'm going. When you talk about being a wandering generality vs being certain… I was trying to be certain, but I was a wandering dumpster fire of a fucking generality.

QUESTION

How has life itself shifted for you as you have become more certain?

Parables from the Pit:

"It took years for me to move away from information ABOUT God to an actual encounter WITH God where I feel this one-to-one, direct relationship & communication that "I" believe vs what it is "supposed" to be based on some information."

—Sam Falsafi

"For the first time, I've been able to have a connection with the Voice that doesn't follow anybody's opinion of what it's "supposed" to be.

-Mick Olinik

WHY DOES THAT EVEN MATTER? | Warrior Week: Parables From the Pit | EP 063 Jun 06, 2019

Show notes

Coach Sam Falsafi welcomes Warrior Week graduate #52, Branden Orr, to today's show. "When you have a good business, a healthy family, and a beautiful wife – and yet you're not happy – you begin questioning why that is. I have a great life and should be excited about that. But instead, I'm filled with the feelings of guilt and shame and there's nobody to share that with." Enter Warrior and the association one finds with the other guys, knowing they are going through the same things you are…and there's no dollar value you can put on that.

Parable #1: Knocking At Warrior's Door

Branden initially learned about Warrior in the first quarter of 2015 via a video. Although he wasn't sure what it was at the time, it intrigued him and he thought it looked like fun, so he filled out the application…but never turned it in. "At that point, I wasn't in the right mindset for it. Something in the Universe prevented it from happening and allowed Warrior to come into my life when I actually needed it the most."
Fast forward to July of 2018 where things inside every area of Branden's life seemed to be falling apart. "I felt a general disconnect from everything in my life. After a huge fight with my wife, I told her it was time for us to divorce…and this time I actually meant it." Later that evening, something from Warrior came across his computer screen and with one click of the mouse, there was Garrett asking a question that resonated deeply with Branden, "Why does that even matter?"

QUESTION

How did you get introduced to Warrior? What has your journey looked like?

Parable #2: Going to War For Your Wife

In a world where the threat of divorce is used as leverage by couples who are in the throes of ugly arguments, Coach Sam truly believes there could be a reframing of this entire game of marriage by eliminating the option of the "easy" way out, aka divorce. After a divorce, the question becomes, "Did you ever really go to war and fight to keep her?"
In an imaginary world where divorce would not be an option, Brenden believes couples world work together more and learn to embrace each other's differences. "The more I come to accept my wife's differences, the more I actually appreciate them and can see how they complement me, rather than seeing them as a threat against me."

QUESTION

How would life itself change for you if instead of going to war against your wife and children, you went to war for them?

Parable #3: The Pit

Inside of his Pit at Warrior Week, Branden came face-to-face with his upbringing and all of the resentment he had been holding onto from the past, namely his father leaving him when he was seven, and the unhealthy example of his mom and stepdad's volatile marriage.
"The door that started opening up for me after the life-changing experience of Warrior Week was a deeper love than I had ever experienced for my wife and my children, and an immense appreciation for them. Up until then, I felt like I was living somebody else's life where I never felt completely connected."

QUESTION

What are you hanging onto that you know you it's time to come face-to-face with?

Parable #4: Before & After

Before Warrior Week, Branden felt that just showing up and being there for his family was enough. But he learned that wasn't the case. "What's different now is our communication. I'm actually listening to and being attentive to my wife and children, and I'm actually showing them how I feel about them."
Inside of the business realm, the idea of expansion did not appeal to his business partner, which caused Branden to feel stuck. "At the end of the day, regardless of the dollar figure, if I'm not growing and the business isn't expanding, then what am I even doing this for?" At the time of this recording, they are days away from selling the business and embarking on a new journey of expansion.

QUESTION

What are some "before and after" moments of your own?

Parable #5: From Private School to Home School

About a month after Warrior Week, Branden and his wife decided to pull their children out of the private school they were attending and to home school them instead."We're so excited about it! We love that we get to teach our children and that they get to see what we do day in and day out. And it's amazing seeing my eight-year-old come up with business plans that might actually work!"
Coach Sam: Years ago if you were to talk to me about that, I would have said no, that's insane. Weird people do that! Today…I'm in a totally different place.

QUESTION

How can you take more of a hands-on approach with your children's education no matter where they attend school?

Parables from the Pit:

"If I'm not happy, there's a source of this unhappiness that is fueling this unhappiness that I have to seek and hunt down, whatever that is. And that's what Warrior does: it brings you to the source and asks you if you're willing to find out why."

—Sam Falsafi

"I was buying stuff I didn't want, to impress people I didn't like."

-Branden Orr

UNRESOLVED CONFLICT | Warrior Week: Parables From the Pit | EP 062 Jun 01, 2019

Show notes

This week's powerful podcast is filled with amazing stories from your host, Coach Sam, and his special guest, Drew Hooper, graduate of Warrior Week #52. Stay tuned as we discover what Drew faced inside his Pit at Warrior Week, the revelation Coach Sam received during a recent chaotic experience at a local restaurant, pivotal Stack revelations, the story behind The Shovel, and much, much more in this week's episode of Warrior Week: Parables From the Pit.

Parable #1: Seeking Connection

Drew's journey into the Warrior's Way began in March 2016 when he received a link from one of his buddies leading to a video of Garrett, the content of which resonated on a deep level with him. His entry point was WarriorBook 500.
About 45 days into the process, Drew's wife revealed to him, "If you hadn't of done this, I was ready to leave." At the time, Drew was oblivious to the signs.

QUESTION

What was your entry point into Warrior?

Parable #2: Feeling Lost

At the time of applying to Warrior Week, Drew felt frustrated, unchallenged, and alone. He felt like he didn't have anyone in his circle with whom he could connect. Warrior Week, for him, meant finding a group of men to connect with, learn from and relate to.
By this time, Drew and his wife had created a safe space for communication in their marriage and things were looking up in all areas of his life. Still, he felt lost. He was ready to burn it all down and was afraid that he was going to lose it all.

QUESTION

How does this resonate for you?

Parable #3: Leader or Dictator?

For a time, Drew's wife had lacked direction and ultimately didn't know what she wanted. "Since I lived a very regimented life, she looked to me as her leader and her rock. As she became more comfortable with herself, I never pulled back from that leadership or dictatorship. I was leading in a way that was out of disregard to what she wanted."
Coach Sam had become a bully inside of his marriage, even though he thought he was just leading. "Today, I realize I was bullying, dictating, and not listening in my marriage, I had been controlling… but with a good heart and a good purpose. I had labeled it as security and protection but as I look back, I ask myself, what was I actually protecting?"

QUESTION

Where in your world are you dictating and bullying rather than leading?

Parable #4: Turning Points

The Stack is a powerful tool inside of Warrior that takes you through a series of questions and ultimately leads you to view things from a different perspective. Inside of that, you get to create a new story surrounding an event, a person, or situation.
"One of the Stacks I did, I was so pissed off at my wife. I felt she was flighty and non-committal on ANYTHING. When I had to walk the block and turn that trigger statement on me, I broke down in tears. The revelation I received was that I was the one who was being and doing everything I had been blaming her for."

QUESTION

Where inside of your world are you projecting blame onto another person?

Parable #5: Dig Your Way Out

In May of 2018, Drew had been called into the Brotherhood Boardroom during a live training where he revealed to Coach Sam that he had been struggling to lose weight. Sam instructed Drew to grab a shovel hanging on the wall behind him – a shovel that had been used for the groundbreaking of a new hospital – and essentially told Drew he was going to "dig his way out of this."
Sam had Drew write down targets on the back of the shovel and instructed him to carry it with him wherever went, with the idea that he was to bring it with him at the end of the year to WarriorCon3. "I took that fuckin' token of a shovel with me everywhere I went!"

QUESTION

What would be a meaningful token and anchor for you as you move toward your desired outcome?

Parables from the Pit:

"It wasn't that these people were doing anything to piss me off; it was because I was already sequenced to be fucking triggered and I was just waiting for the final victim to blame, which was the old guy with the fucking mustache."

—Sam Falsafi

"I start to realize that the only reason why I'm pissed off is because there's something about it that's a reflection of myself. And that awareness is a little bit fucked up because it makes it difficult to stay mad."

--Drew Hooper

LETTING GO OF THE GOOD FOR THE GREAT | Warrior Week | EP 061 May 27, 2019

Show notes

What causes a man to want to go to Warrior Week when his business is the most successful it's ever been, and life is good? Welcome to this week's episode of Warrior Week: Parables From the Pit with Coach Sam and his guest, Mike Cottmeyer, where we discover the answer to that question and learn why Mike chose to walk through the gates of Warrior Week #52 even after learning about his wife's life-threatening diagnosis a mere two days before.

Parable #1: Feeling Isolated

In the summer of 2018, it was the viewing of one video that caused Mike to step into the world of Warrior via the Kings Kit Challenge, which proved to be a poignant turning point in his life. Although he had more monetary success than ever before, he was feeling disconnected on every level and was feeling completely isolated.
The message from the video that resonated with Mike the most was this idea that guys who are really successful in business are bored. "I know people have problems paying their electric bill; I had a problem making my million and a half payroll every month. Who do you share that kind of pressure with?"

QUESTION

How is having an association of men to share life with making a difference in your life?

Parable #2: Taking a Leap

When Mike took the leap out of corporate America to start his company, he gave away the security and promise of the paycheck for the uncertainty of doing his own thing. "What I found was, that was just the first of many leaps."
Pre-Warrior, Mike felt that he had reached the ceiling on what he could accomplish as a leader, as a husband, and as a father. He was feeling overwhelmed. Two days before he entered the doors of Warrior Week, his wife was diagnosed with a life-threatening illness.

QUESTION

Where have you been taking leaps in your life? How has your life changed because of those leaps?

Parable #3: The Cemetery

When Mike was 23, his mother passed away from cancer, which was the most painful thing he had experienced up to that point in his life. Fast forward two decades to Warrior Week where the group is in a van traveling to visit a cemetery. When asked by one of the coaches what his reaction would be if his wife were to die from her illness, the best response Mike could muster in that moment was, "I would be sad."
"With my mother's death, that was a pivotal time in my life which turned off a range of emotions for me. If it doesn't crack that level, fuck it. It is what it is. You want to trigger an emotion in me? Put me in a cemetery thinking about my mom and writing letters to my kids about what would happen if I were to die. I can get to that emotion, but I'm not comfortable living there."

QUESTION

When was the last time you gave yourself permission to experience deep emotion?

Parable #4: Modeling Behavior

Mike's involvement in Warrior has allowed him to create space for conversations with his sons Zach, Daniel, and Noah. What he's trying to model for them is "just because things get fucked up or go a little sideways, doesn't mean it's over. Don't give up."
"Basically, it's modeling behavior. They're seeing me get into better shape, pray & meditate, emotionally connect with their mom & them every day. They're seeing what's going on in the business, that we're going to continue to collide, and that I'm not giving up."

QUESTION

What behavior are you modeling for your children?

Parable #5: Letting Go to Lead

Post-Warrior, Mike has chosen to spend more time with his wife which has meant letting go and whittling down the hours he works on his business. "In my little niche of the world, I'm the Garrett White of my industry. I'm the speaker, I'm the rain-maker, I'm the one who's out there. When I take a step back, there's a real risk for it to slow down."
"When you have strong leaders, you've got to give them space to lead. And when you're a control freak like me, it's hard to know which pieces you can let go of and which pieces you can't. It's a tough balance."

QUESTION

Whether in your home or business, what can you let go of in order to create space for others to lead?

Parables from the Pit:

"It doesn't matter what the fuck you say – whether it's wrong or right – as long as you're certain, people will follow."

—Sam Falsafi

"Warrior Week for me was the beginning of a journey. It was like having a veil lifted and realizing there was a whole different way of looking at the world that I hadn't been paying attention to."

-Mike Cottmeyer

What Would You Do If You Didn't Fear Fear? | Warrior Week | EP 060 May 22, 2019

Show notes

Coach Sam's special guest in this week's epic episode of Warrior Week: Parables from the Pit, is Coach Tony Blauer, creator of the SPEAR system that focuses on how to Detect, De-fuse, and Defend against violent encounters, and where students are trained to use the physiology of the startle-flinch response to deal with ambush attacks. Get ready to experience a fascinating and mind-opening conversation in this special episode.

Parable #1: Confidence & Certainty

In 2012, when Coach Sam moved to Laguna Beach from Houston, he stepped into the CrossFit world. However, after about a year, he discovered he simply wasn't good at it and felt as if he was always at the bottom of the board.
As he was searching the internet one day, Sam found Tony Blauer who was teaching self-defense using CrossFit. This fascinated Sam. As he immersed himself in it, it appealed to him because it enabled him to tap into his primal side. Not only had Sam found something he could be good at, but it was also a way for him to access confidence and certainty.

QUESTION

How do you access confidence and certainty in your life?

Parable #2: Tony's Light Bulb Moment

Tony, who has been teaching, studying, and researching violence for the past five decades, had his big light bulb moment in 1980 after a fifteen-year-old he had been training lost a fight to a bully. Tony suddenly realized the way self-defense was being taught was all wrong.
"In a vacuum, we break boards, we spar, we do katas, but nobody was doing research and putting people in a dynamic situation where it was scenario based. We were teaching Block Training instead of the desired Brain-Based Training. I wanted to create a self-defense system that worked in the real world"

QUESTION

Describe a light bulb moment you have experienced.

Parable #3: The Perfect Marriage

Circumstances brought Tony to a place where he had this perspective of how to marry CrossFit with self-defense. For example, a push up could be the same genetic chain as a palm strike.
"When I go for a run, part of what I include in my running is sprinting away from danger AND sprinting to save somebody.

QUESTION

What are your experiences with Crossfit and self-defense?

Parable #4: Startle-Flinch

We teach people that the startle-flinch is going to happen naturally; it's part of your physiology. What we want to do is change our relationship with it and re-educate ourselves.
The difference between stimulus and response is the gap time or your holy shit moment where you have to figure shit out. We don't want to be reactive, we want to be responsive.

QUESTION

As a man, what have you been taught to believe about flinching?

Parable #5: Bells Palsy

Coach Tony opens up about his experience with Bells Palsy where he awakened one day to find the left side of his face numb and drooping. He laughed when the emergency room Doc asked him if he had ever been hit in the head. "Yes, for about 30 years!"
As a public speaker with events to show up to, Tony was embarrassed about the way he looked and his inability to communicate as he usually did. When given the option for his team to handle things, his response was, "I'm a fucking leader."

QUESTION

What is one lesson you have learned as a result of unexpected circumstances or events showing up in your life?

Parables from the Pit:

"Often, those that fear the most, in a hidden way, make others fear them."

—Sam Falsafi

"You can't write your next chapter or make your next move unless you accept what's going on, and then get strategic. It is what it is."

-Tony Blauer

PERCEPTION OF PERFECTION | Warrior Week | EP 059 May 18, 2019

Show notes

Coach Sam welcomes Christian Davidson to the show today where their in-depth conversation leads them to share stories & experiences that uncover destructive patterns and behaviors of men in today's society.

Parable #1: Turning Points

Christian was initially introduced to Warrior when he received a text from his friend that read, "You've got to check out this video! This guy's crazy!"
Christian found Garrett's message riveting & compelling and wanted to feel the certainty and fire that Garrett was displaying. His buddy suggested they do Warrior Week together but in the end, it was Christian who ultimately reached out to Coach Sam, forever altering the trajectory of his life.

ASK YOURSELF

Describe a significant turning point in your life.

Parable #2: Freedom & Fire

In the years leading up to his immersion into Warrior, there were areas of Christan's life that he felt had slipped and fallen; where he experienced subtle change and erosion over time due to his choices and stories.
This brought with it heaviness, disappointment, and guilt that built up and clogged his energy. After Warrior, Christian experienced freedom and fire as he used the tools of Warrior, coupled with the accountability he found within the brotherhood.

ASK YOURSELF

Where in your world have you awakened to and noticed subtle erosion over time?

Parable #3: Stacking Obstacles

As a teen, Christian had established a strong foundation in certain areas of his life through his choices and daily disciplines which continued through his 20s. In his 30s, as he took on more responsibility with marriage, children, and business, those disciplines shifted.
Like many men, Christian began feeling shame and guilt as he started moving away from those disciplines and moved deeper into a pit. How does this happen? How do we find ourselves suddenly out of a routine that has been working so well for us for many years?

ASK YOURSELF

What daily routines & disciplines did you change or give up once you entered into your marriage? Why?

Parable #4: Define Your Outcomes

When men get married, most begin focusing on their business and body at the expense of their relationships and spirituality. Why? Because the hustle of business and body can be easily measured, while results in the areas of relationships and spiritually are built around assumptions and comparisons.
In the 90 days post-Warrior, Christian was able to define for himself what successful outcomes looked like in all four areas of his life, including the oft-times difficult to define areas of relationships and spirituality, a practice he continues to find life-altering.

ASK YOURSELF

How do you define success in all areas of your life? What are those definitions based on?

Parable #5: Isolation

Twenty years into his marriage, Christian experienced a divorce. His feelings of self-worth had dropped, and looking back, he felt he didn't handle circumstances well at the time. "When I should have been communicating more, I communicated less."
When things inside of his business began crashing, instead of slowing things down and opening up to his wife about their circumstances, he doubled down on work and kept it all inside to try to protect her and their four children from the stress of it all.

ASK YOURSELF

What do you keep from your spouse in order to "protect" them?

Parables from the Pit:

"You're uncomfortable in the presence of truth because you're a fucking liar. What if you began to practice the art of telling the truth?"

—Sam Falsafi

"Wake Up Warrior is a unique tribe of powerful men, unlike anything we normally associate with in our day-to-day associations & connections; a tribe of truth hunters who are seeking expansion in every area of their life."

-Christian Davidson

CLEAN & SNATCH | Warrior Week | EP 058 May 11, 2019

Show notes

In this week's special episode, Coach Sam and Coach Maximilian Mormont have a riveting conversation about Max's myriad adventures & world travels, poignant turning points, mastery & family, and… Coach Sam makes an important announcement and commitment to Max.

Parable #1: Blood Money

In 1996, an accident that claimed the lives of two of his college friends became a turning point for Max where he began playing the 'fuck you' game. "God, you saved me…but, why?"
He began putting himself in harm's way after receiving settlement money from the accident and poured this 'blood money' into drugs. For a time, he traveled the U.S. dealing drugs and spending time with high-level athletes until deciding to return home to his mother.

QUESTION

How does this resonate with experiences in your life?

Parable #2: Turning It Around

Max's choices after returning home led him from the possibility of facing involuntary manslaughter charges to probation and ultimately to be in the position of wanting to turn his life around.
He became a bartender, went back to school, got into bodybuilding, personal training, coaching, managing major gyms, helped develop CrossFit football, and found his way into Olympic weight lifting.

QUESTION

What has been a turning point in your life?

Parable #3: Mastery

Sam: "It's four years of your fucking life dedicated to two fucking movements day and night: clean and snatch. That's mastery!"
Max: "It's 10,000 hours. And if you really look into the mastery of 10,000 hours of something, the reality is, you actually have to put time into something.

QUESTION

Where in your world are you devoting time to becoming a master at something?

Parable #4: Train For Something

Sam had an experience with Max's wife, also a coach, where she instilled in him the necessity to train for something vs going to the gym or working out without having a target in mind.
Max: Training for something doesn't necessarily have to be training for fitness or health, it could just be discovering and understanding how your body works and taking ownership of it.

QUESTION

What are you currently training for?

Parable #5: Cyclops

As Max entered Warrior, he began wondering, "What the fuck am I doing here? Everything's pretty good in my life; what do I need to fix?" What Max discovered was a spiritual path, unlike anything he had experienced up to this point in his life.
After the men had been directed to draw Light & Dark Warrior in their journals, Max drew a picture of Cyclops to represent his Dark Warrior. At first, he wanted to erase it until he realized that his drawing was the perfect representation of himself with the one eye mirroring his laser focus once he hooks onto something.

QUESTION

What does your Dark Warrior look like?

Parables from the Pit:

"When I first met Max several years ago, I was a sedated mother fucker who traveled the world with my Blackberry and suitcase and had a feeling of significance."

—Sam Falsafi

"People want to get strong until the weight gets heavy."

— Coach Maximilian Mormont

PIECE BY PIECE | Warrior Week | EP 057 May 05, 2019

Show notes

Warrior Week 52 graduate, Jason Kehler, and Coach Sam have a conversation about Jason's journey over the past ten years, and how his introduction into Warrior through a message that pierced his heart ultimately opened the door to massive change inside his life and his marriage.

Parable #1: Lack of Connection

What Jason was experiencing at the time he was first introduced to the message of Warrior was a lack of connection with God, a lack of connection with his wife, a lack of purpose inside his business, and a feeling of shame for his nearly 300-pound body.
Over time, he had filled his life with victim stories, particularly one involving his wife that caused him to drift away from her for ten years. During this period of time, he felt that none of the issues he was facing mattered or took priority.

QUESTION

Where in your world are you experiencing a complete lack of connection with a significant person or relationship?

Parable #2: Cracking the Shell

Jason began delving deeper into Warrior via the various podcasts and books, which eventually led him to Kings Kit. It was through a protocol involving his family that ultimately prove to be a poignant turning point in his marriage.
It was in the sharing of his feelings with his family that cracked open the hardened shell around him. This propelled him into the reality that his involvement inside of Warrior could actually be life-changing.

QUESTION

What was the turning point in your life that began to turn things around for you?

Parable #3: Before & After

After having experienced zero date nights with his wife for the past six to eight years – and perhaps only two to three sexual connections a year – Jason and his wife are now experiencing regular date nights and regular sex.
Their discussions and collisions are enabling them to take a look at the things that have been impeding their growth and are now clearing them off the table. Their conversations have turned from 'what do I want' into 'what do we want?'

QUESTION

What does your 'Before & After' look like? What are the decisions and actions that created it?

Parable #4: Two Sides of the Coin

Coach Sam: There's how you felt and what you experienced, and there's also how your wife felt and what she experienced. Where is her pain? Where is her pit? Who took her into her pit? Who is guiding her?
Jason: I didn't show up for her. I had no empathy for her, and I left all the responsibility to those who were caring for her. These past six months have been about recognizing this, stepping up, claiming responsibility, and expressing to her my need to have her at the core of my life.

QUESTION

When you take a step back, how have you been showing up inside your relationship?

Parable #5: Faith & Focus

When Jason looks back at who he used to be – a 'man' who was not showing up for his wife nor his children – he is blown away that she never left him. "I can only imagine that her faith in God is what kept her here."
Waking up every day with a focus on his wife and making deposits into her has allowed them to compress time and rebuild the connection & the spark between them.

QUESTION

What has kept you or your spouse inside a marriage that is seemingly 'over?'

Parables from the Pit:

"The puzzle that you have in front of you doesn't tell you that you lost ten years; what you have is a blueprint for the next forty years."

—Sam Falsafi

"When you get to the place of knowing that you're enough, that's an incredibly epic place to be after you have spent decades not feeling that."

-Jason Kehler

TIME On Dad's Watch | Warrior Week | EP 056 May 01, 2019

Show notes

Coach Sam and Warrior Week #52 graduate, Don Burris, have an in-depth conversation about important & relevant topics not often discussed with men and share significant insights in this week's special episode of Warrior Week: Parables from the Pit.

Parable #1: Obligation or Love?

As men, at what point are we transitioning from being boys & teenagers into men? As fathers, how are you showing up for your children – as a supportive dad or like a fucking teenager?
If you do show up as a dad, is it out of obligation and expectation, or is it from a space of love and wanting to empower your kids & your family?

QUESTION

How are you showing up for your children?

Parable #2: A Matter of Time

Bedtime routines are unique to every family, yet inside of that, there's this common belief that children should be in bed by 6:30pm, something Coach Sam vehemently disagrees with and questions.
When men arrive home at night and the kids are already in bed, that's a problem that needs to be addressed. If men don't speak up about this to their wives, the future will surely hold regrets in the hearts of the men for the time they lost with their children.

QUESTION

What is the bedtime routine at your home? Are both you and your wife in agreement with it?

Parable #3: The Forgotten Ones

Children and their feelings are oft times the overlooked commodity when it comes to divorce. Many fathers, in an attempt to 'find happiness' again, begin spending less and less time with their children and more and more time searching for happiness in the arms of other women.
Who really knows the struggles of children as they are thrust into this new situation? Do they struggle with darkness or being bullied? Significance or popularity? Before they drift off to sleep, what are their thoughts? What are they feeling?

QUESTION

What can you do to open up the lines of communication with your children about their feelings?

Parable #4: Let it Flow

The valve of the male heart gets shut down pretty early, where we don't know where to pour all of this pure love & energy we feel as a kid. As a result, we begin restricting the flow of love.
This ultimately leads to kids shutting down their hearts and lying during the time of their lives when they should actually be opening it wide open

QUESTION

What do you remember about this when you were a kid? Do you see the same thing happening with your children?

Parable #5: Awareness

Don: Inside the pit at Warrior Week, my heart was on fire again. I was aware of all these things I had suppressed, all the demons and lies I had created.
Coach Sam: Our imagination is the source of that creation; the source of our fucking lies. When something happens, we imagine, we assume, and then as alpha males, we justify in order to back that fucking imagination. Awareness eliminates imagination.

QUESTION

What was your experience inside the Pit at Warrior Week?

Parables from the Pit:

"There's one fucking time, and that time says, love."

—Sam Falsafi

"I used to think my heart was my enemy; now my heart is my sword and my shield."

–Don Burris

THE MAN WITH THE CHECK | Warrior Week | EP 055 Apr 25, 2019

Show notes

Warrior Week 43 graduate, Franco Cabral, is Coach Sam's special guest in this week's episode of Warrior Week: Parables from the Pit. Franco's fascinating story is one filled with twists and turns of the miraculous kind and is certain to ignite the fire of inspiration & change within you.

Parable #1: Painful Reality

A graduate of Warrior Week 43, Franco was initially introduced to Warrior at the beginning of 2016 by a friend with whom he hadn't connected for nine years. WarriorCon1 was the first event he attended and it was there that he discovered the painful reality of the facts of his life.
It was during a special meditation that Franco was able to take a step back and look at where he really was in life, asking himself the questions: Is this what I really want? Do I really want to continue being 'that' guy? Would I share these facts with my daughter?

QUESTION

Do you really want to continue being 'that' guy, the man who runs from the facts of his life?

Parable #2: The Mirror

After Franco's wake-up call, he decided to go 'all in' with Warrior and began using the tools. Although he began seeing gains in his life and started feeling good about himself, the foundation he was creating was a foundation of lies.
It was after the birth of his son a few months later that Franco had the realization that his infant son was a mirror for him; that he was the only one who truly saw him. Aware of the darkness that was gathering around him, Franco knew that his son and daughter deserved better.

QUESTION

Who and what do you see when you look in the mirror?

Parable #3: Maybe I'm Not Alone

Although in great financial deficit, Franco reached out to Coach Sam and committed to Warrior Week, not knowing how the fuck he was going to pull it off financially. He was tired, and unbeknownst to him at the time, his marriage was headed down a dark path.
During the two weeks Coach Sam had given Franco to put the money together for Warrior Week, Franco received a call out of the blue from a man with whom he had made an investment seven years before; an investment Franco had all but forgotten about. That afternoon, the man handed Franco a check for $19,500.

QUESTION

How has a path miraculously opened up for you that didn't previously exist?

Parable #4: Turning Points

The pivotal moment for Franco at Warrior Week came when he was face down in freezing cold water, his entire body was shivering, and the question was being asked of him, "What will happen if you do nothing?" Time stopped at that moment for Franco as the thought of another man raising his children entered his mind.
Since that day, much has changed for Franco. His family life is unrecognizable, he recently re-proposed to his wife, his spirituality has been rekindled, he listens to the Voice who's existence he used to question, he's in the best shape of his life, he's experiencing certainty & clarity, he is having powerful collisions, and he has rekindled his relationship with his father.

QUESTION

What has been a pivotal moment for you in your life? What happened? How has your life shifted because of it?

Parable #5: Impact

In January of 2019, the man who handed the investment check to Franco showed up at his door, a broken man in a very dark place. Many months before that, he had asked a question of Franco to which Franco responded in complete honesty and unleashed exactly where he was in all areas of his life at the time.
Franco listened and shared his pain; he held space for this man who had enabled Franco to enter Warrior Week. He chose for himself to go 'all in' and now Franco is a witness to this man's journey and transformation, which "fills me in a way that's indescribable."

QUESTION

Who in your world have you shared space for? How did it feel?

Parables from the Pit:

"It is the structure of the CEO of the Universe to open the doors."

—Sam Falsafi

"One thing I've learned at Warrior is that every time I truly have been 'all in' in my heart, God has helped me find the path."

-Franco Cabral