the tortoise & the hare

Latest Episodes:

Creating Empty Space May 14, 2017

Show notes

Ben and Brooke are back with another simple experiment for you this week, and it’s all about empty space.

Emptiness gets a pretty bad reputation. Seen as a negative trait, a lack of personality, a boring experience for a boring person. But Brooke is a big fan of emptiness and this week she and Ben talk about the fact that there is something wonderful to be gained by embracing a little empty space in your home, your days, your head…

It’s not necessarily about convincing you that emptiness is something you should like. In fact, you may discover that you really miss the photos, the books, the cushion or the vases that you pack away, which is great. What this very simple experiment is doing is asking you to pay attention, to be intentional, to tap back in to your reasons for having things, rather than operating on auto-pilot. So while it might look like an experiment about stuff or space, it’s actually a reminder to notice more.

Of course you may also realise (much like Ben and Brooke did when they removed all the artwork from their walls) that you enjoy the added space, and that’s awesome too.

Head over to http://www.slowyourhome.com/160 for the full blog post and to share what part of your home you decided to empty this week.

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If you're enjoying the show and want to know how to best support it, leave a rating or a review in iTunes or head over to the Patreon page to help support the show financially.

And thanks so much for listening!

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Join The Tortoise Community: https://brookemcalary.substack.com/

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Bronnie Ware on finding comfort in discomfort May 10, 2017

Show notes

After her blog post, 'Top 5 Regrets of the Dying' went viral in 2009, Bronnie Ware was catapulted in to the limelight. Her words impacted countless people as she laid bare those regrets faced by so many of her elderly patients as they faced the end of their lives.

(If you haven't read it you can find a link to the full post over on http://www.slowyourhome.com/159).

Today, however, Brooke and Bronnie sit down to talk about what has come since that post went berserk on the internet. And it turns out it's been an incredible ride, full of unexpected growth and pain and discomfort and beauty. Today Bronnie shares her personal journey and insights with Brooke as they talk about what it means to live a regret-free life and why it's so often incredibly painful to do so.

They talk about why discomfort is the way through and how learning to soften in to it is vital in finding acceptance and gentleness in life, as well as the role of simplicity and meditation in unlocking that acceptance and gentleness.

Bronnie is a deep thinker, a modern philosopher, and there is so much goodness to unpack in this episode that it might just require a second (or third! or fourth!) listen.

Enjoy!

You'll also hear a sneak peek of our newest show - Sampled Conversations with Seamus McAlary at the end of this week's episode. Once you've listened to Bronnie go check it out and subscribe at http://jackrabbit.fm/sampled-conversations/)

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If you're enjoying the show and want to know how to best support it, leave a rating or a review in iTunes or head over to the Patreon page to help support the show financially.

And thanks so much for listening!

====

Join The Tortoise Community: https://brookemcalary.substack.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It’s Great to Suck at Something May 07, 2017

Show notes

In a recent New York Times article, journalist Karen Rinaldi ruminated on the benefits of sucking at things:

“The notion of sucking at something flies in the face of the overhyped notion of perfectionism. The lie of perfectionism goes something like this: “If I fail, it’s only because I seek perfection.” Or “I can never finish anything because I’m a perfectionist.” Since the perfectionist will settle for nothing less, she is left with nothing…

“By taking off the pressure of having to excel at or master an activity, we allow ourselves to live in the moment.”

In this episode Ben and Brooke dive in to the idea of being OK with not being good at something, and why there is a freedom in accepting that they may never move beyond the mediocre. Brooke talks about the fact that she enjoys things a lot more (like snowboarding, for example) when she lets go of the need to ride like a boss and that there is a lightness and a fun that exists in doing something for the pure joy rather than striving for constant improvement.

They also talk about meditation and why it’s actually incredibly beneficial to not be good at it, as well as the joy and delight that lies in allowing ourselves to be beginners, forever learning.

Head over to http://www.slowyourhome.com/158 for the full blog post and this week’s takeaway. And enjoy!

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If you're enjoying the show and want to know how to best support it, leave a rating or a review in iTunes or head over to the Patreon page to help support the show financially.

And thanks so much for listening!

====

Join The Tortoise Community: https://brookemcalary.substack.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sarah Wilson on going slow and the power of a good flâner May 03, 2017

Show notes

Today Brooke chats with the wonderful, challenging, inspiring author Sarah Wilson. Sarah is someone Brooke has admired for years - not only for the work she’s done to promote the notion of drastically cutting sugar in our diets, preventing food waste, and her more recent work in mental health awareness - but also the way she goes about that work. She is honest and open, prepared to stand for something regardless of whether people agree with her, and she’s also funny and smart and good at not taking herself too seriously.

In this conversation Brooke and Sarah talk about her new book, ‘first we make the beast beautiful: a new story about anxiety’ and dive deep in to how Sarah slows down in order to both strengthen herself against anxiety’s harmful side, and simultaneously go deeper in to it.

They talk about the discomfort of true reflection and Sarah’s growing boredom with shallow conversations and external grasping (and why cocktail parties are the worst example of this!) as well as the idea that it’s not necessary or even helpful to slow down simply for the sake of slowing down, but rather aiming to slow down in order to be or do something meaningful.

As an avid bush walker, Sarah talks about why she chooses to head off in to the bush every second weekend (more if possible) and what the rhythm and solitude of solo hiking provides her that other exercises can’t. Sarah shares her cure for insomnia and why one of her two major tenets of slow-ness is to simply walk. She also introduces Brooke to the French idea of ‘flâner’, an urban wandering, and why sometimes it’s enough to simply walk through our own neighbourhood, noticing, paying attention, watching people and observing the comings and goings that surround us.

They also talk about meditation and why it’s the second key tenet of slow-ness for Sarah, and why it’s not only OK to suck at meditation, but why it’s actually incredibly useful to be bad at it.

This is a cracker of an episode, packed with loads of inspiration. Head over to http://www.slowyourhome.com/157 for the full blog post, including links to Sarah's books, website and other resources mentioned in today's show, and in the meantime, enjoy!

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If you're enjoying the show and want to know how to best support it, leave a rating or a review in iTunes or head over to the Patreon page to help support the show financially.

And thanks so much for listening!

====

Join The Tortoise Community: https://brookemcalary.substack.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Your Why: Putting it in to practice Apr 30, 2017

Show notes

Today marks the final episode of Ben and Brooke’s series on uncovering and harnessing your Why.

As Brooke mentioned last week, she’s sometimes struggled to take her personal Why and use it to help steer her in the smaller, more everyday decisions, which is why she distilled her big picture Why (her eulogy) in to a list of personal values. It’s these values that they talk about today, and more specifically, how to apply them in the everyday.

Brooke shares how she puts some of her decisions on a values scale and asks herself, “On a scale of 1-10, with 1 being least compassionate and 10 being most, where does this choice lie?” The helpful thing with doing it this way is that she can see that not everything is going to be a 10. In fact, most things aren’t going to be a 10. But aiming for more compassion over less is a good place to work towards regardless.

Head over to http://www.slowyourhome.com/156 for the full blog post and this week’s simple task, and in the meantime, enjoy!

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If you're enjoying the show and want to know how to best support it, leave a rating or a review in iTunes or head over to the Patreon page to help support the show financially.

And thanks so much for listening!

====

Join The Tortoise Community: https://brookemcalary.substack.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sunday funday, managing emails and our favourite beers Apr 26, 2017

Show notes

It’s hostful time again and the questions Brooke and Ben answer today are, as always, complete crackers.

Do you have any tips on managing email and the impact it’s having on my life, both personal and professional?
How can I deal with kids clothes? We’re constantly receiving hand-me-downs and the sheer volume is making things difficult. Any tips on keeping it manageable?
Has there ever been a point in the beginning of your journey where you felt stuck? Perhaps lost momentum? I'm feeling a little frustrated at the moment, but I'm a long way away from where I've come. What can I do to move past this?
Do you meal plan for lunches and breakfasts as well as dinners? How does this work?
What's your favorite choice of beer?!
And what do you like to throw on the grill?!
I'm trying to slow things down here and implement "Sunday Fun days" at my house. Would love to hear your take on slow, fun days at home.

As you can see, a varied offering of questions and lots of fun was had in the answering. You can head over to http://www.slowyourhome.com/155 for all the details from today’s show plus the recipe for Brooke’s black bean and sweet potato patties.
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If you're enjoying the show and want to know how to best support it, leave a rating or a review in iTunes or head over to the Patreon page to help support the show financially.

And thanks so much for listening!

====

Join The Tortoise Community: https://brookemcalary.substack.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Your Why: Values Apr 23, 2017

Show notes

Last week Ben and Brooke both went fairly deep in to the idea of legacy. Brooke spoke about her eulogy and Ben spoke about the things that drive him in a big picture, high level way. They spoke about the kind of life they want to live in order for those legacies to come to fruition, and the jarring realisation that they often miss the mark.

The only problem Brooke has ever had with the idea of eulogy is that there was always a certain level of specificity missing, so in today’s episode they look at the next level of intention - values - what they are, what theirs are, and how they use them in addition to their Why to determine their choices and actions on the day to day level.

Brooke picks apart her eulogy from last week and extracts three key values on which she can essentially make any decision, and Ben does the same with his. Next week, as they wrap up this series, they’re going to look at how to use these values as a framework on which to base decisions and take action.

Head over to http://www.slowyourhome.com/154 to read about this week’s task and to dive deep in to Brooke and Ben’s values.

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If you're enjoying the show and want to know how to best support it, leave a rating or a review in iTunes or head over to the Patreon page to help support the show financially.

And thanks so much for listening!

====

Join The Tortoise Community: https://brookemcalary.substack.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Slow WIP (aka a Work in Progress podcast) Apr 19, 2017

Show notes

When is a hostful not actually a hostful? When it's a WIP! (Otherwise known as a Work In Progress).

In this episode Brooke and Ben talk about the one thing they do every week which allows them to work together, be productive and actually like each other at the end of (almost) every day. Their Monday morning WIP is the cornerstone of their working week and in today's poggie they look at how it works and the structure it takes now that they're 18 months into the self-employment adventure.

They also use this as a springboard to discuss the bigger issue of living a less-than-slow life right now, and how they find balance between building a business and maintaining a certain level of slow-ness in home and family life. It's not an easy one to strike and Brooke admits to the toll it can take when advocating for slow while not being able to live it. But on the flipside, she also talks about how she's turned that from a guilt-ridden experience to one of learning and a deeper understanding of what the mindset of slow living looks like - even when it's not slow-paced.

Ben and Brooke also talk about some of the changes they're currently making in their work and how they imagine it's going to impact the podcast and the ways in which they can help people live a slower, simpler life themselves.

This is very much a Work In Progress poggie, with plenty of honesty from all corners. Enjoy!

And thanks to today's sponsor - Pocketbook. To download the free Pocketbook app and take control of your finances today, head to http://www.getpocketbook.com/slowhome

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If you're enjoying the show and want to know how to best support it, leave a rating or a review in iTunes or head over to the Patreon page to help support the show financially.

And thanks so much for listening!

====

Join The Tortoise Community: https://brookemcalary.substack.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Your Why: Legacy Apr 16, 2017

Show notes

Last week Brooke and Ben spoke about the idea of developing your Why - specifically, what it is and why it’s important. Today they continue that same conversation, focusing on how to uncover your Why.

Brooke has spoken about it on the podcast before, but it was an eulogy writing exercise that helped her uncover her personal Why, so in this episode she reads that eulogy aloud and talks about the impact it’s had on the years since. Ben also digs in to the idea of legacy for the first time, and they both discuss how important it is to have this big-picture notion of what will remain once they're gone.

It can seem like a very heavy thing to consider, but Brooke and Ben both agree that doing the work to uncover these big Whys, and the smaller ones over the following couple of weeks, is one of the most informative things we can do in creating a life we're proud of.

Head over to http://www.slowyourhome.com/152 for this week's action and to answer some questions designed to help you tap in to your own Why.

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If you're enjoying the show and want to know how to best support it, leave a rating or a review in iTunes or head over to the Patreon page to help support the show financially.

And thanks so much for listening!

====

Join The Tortoise Community: https://brookemcalary.substack.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Art of Frugal Hedonism with Annie Raser-Rowland Apr 12, 2017

Show notes

Have you ever had a conversation that changes your entire outlook on the world? One that shifts your worldview in monumental ways? That challenges and invites you to think about your choices in terms that are entirely different?

In today's episode, Brooke chats with the utterly wonderful Annie Raser-Rowland, co-author of The Art of Frugal Hedonism and experiences one of those conversations...

Join The Tortoise Community: https://brookemcalary.substack.com/

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