The Reductress Minute

Combat Boots That’ll Serve You Well in the War on Christmas (with Tim Platt) Dec 08, 2021

Sarah and Madison talk about booster shots and the War on Christmas, sex positions that won’t make your man think about you pooping, and speak to a doctor with…a harrowing secret.

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Teen Mom? This 29-Year-Old Had a Baby (with Ingrid Ostby and Rachel Coster) Dec 01, 2021

Sarah and guest host Milly Tamarez talk about Thanksgiving and Tampa, speak to a brave teen 29-year-old mom, and learns some dark news from a dog that is able to speak.

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How to Grow Out Your Bangs So Much You Escape the Surveillance State (with Dylan Adler and Lanee´ Sanders) Nov 17, 2021

Sarah and guest host Milly Tamarez talk about Taylor’s new album, speak to someone who absolutely refuses to do a little jog when she crosses the street, and learns some creative new ways to escape the surveillance state.

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I’m an Introvert, but Boy Do I Like It In The Ass (with Patti Harrison, Ellena Eshraghi, and Sumayya Bisseret-Martinez) Nov 10, 2021

Madison and Damien talk about the “university” of “Austin”, get some advice on how to infiltrate another person’s friend group, and talk to a bona-fide introvert who’s got something to share. Plus, a reading from Patti Harrison.

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Uh Oh! This Coven of Witches is Also an MLM (with Liva Pierce, Sam Reece, and Becky Chicoine) Nov 03, 2021

Sarah and Damien catch up on their Halloweekend, and talk to a couple of local witches with an incredible offer. Madison divulges how she dealt with her boyfriend who didn't want to go apple picking, and a cat tells us exactly when and how we're going to die. Plus, a reading from Reductress writer Liva Pierce (@choppedliva).

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Sleep Paralysis Demon Not Loving the Most Recent Bedroom Renovations You Made (with Grace Perry) Oct 20, 2021

Reductress editors Madison and Sarah (@m4disondillard and @yourpappalardo) talk about how to hide your IBS by pretending to do coke in the bathroom. They’ll talk to Dan the sleep paralysis demon, and share how to journal without trying to make your journal think you’re cool. On this week’s episode, Grace Perry (@perryjetaime) reads, “I LIVED IT: The Girl I Babysit for Drew Me Fucking Ugly”

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Should You Apply to Grad School or Maybe Just Lie Down for a Few Minutes? (with Lauren Ashley Smith) Oct 13, 2021

Reductress editors Damien and Sarah (@dimakronfeld and @m4disondillard) are both very, very sick. They’ll talk to the woman who isn’t dating the Phillie Phanatic mascot because she’s a furry, but specifically because he is tall, and will ask editorial assistant Kendra whether she should apply to grad school or maybe just lie down for awhile On this week’s episode, Lauren Ashley Smith (@mslas) reads a piece from Reductress, plus, we answer the question: Did you forget to lock your door?

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How to Get High but Not So High That You Start Thinking About Climate Change (with Lauren Lapkus) Oct 06, 2021

Reductress editors Damien and Sarah (@dimakronfeld and @yourpappalardo) take you through the week’s hottest stories and the hardest questions, like “Will this iced coffee give you anxiety, diarrhea, or a will to live?” On this week’s episode, Lauren Lapkus (@laurenlapkus) reads a piece from Reductress, plus our intern absolutely REFUSES to sit normally in a chair!

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We're BACK on October 6th! And This Acoustic Cover of Uptown Funk Has a Little Something For Nobody (w/Rachel Bloom, Bowen Yang, Catherine Cohen) Oct 01, 2021

The Reductress Minute is BACK on October 6th! Stay tuned for new episodes coming soon.

Reductress editors Rachel and Taylor (@rachelwenitsky and @casualafro) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Rachel Bloom (Crazy Ex-Girlfriend), Catherine Cohen (@cathcohen) and Bowen Yang (@bowenyang) read pieces from Reductress, plus we sing an acoustic cover of Uptown Funk that has a little something for nobody.

How I Made Life In New York Work on a 150,000 Dollar Salary, was written by Loretta Donelan. How To Touch A Naked Man On His Penis was written by Angela Marie DeManti. This Acoustic Cover of Uptown Funk Has a Little Something For Nobody was written by Damien Kronfeld.

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Dermatologists Hate Her! This Woman Is Really Mean to Dermatologists (w/Janeane Garofalo, Patti Harrison, Mara Wilson, Jasmine Pierce) Sep 10, 2021

HUGE ANNOUNCEMENT: The Reductress Minute is BACK on October 6! We're playing some of our favorite episodes this month to gear up for Season 3.

This week, Reductress editors take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Patti Harrison (@partyharderson), Jasmine Pierce (@jasminecomedy), and Mara Wilson (@marawilson), read pieces from Reductress, plus we prank call Katie Couric, get a really sweet shout-out from our bestie Janeane Garofalo, and shout out to all our fans that are “literally dead” right now.

Fuckboy Blossoms Into Fuckman was written by April Lavalle, and special thanks to Damien Kronfeld for our episode title, Dermatologists Hate Her! This Woman Is Really Mean to Dermatologists.

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Reductress Minute LIVE at Caveat (w/Mo Fry Pasic, Mariah Smith, and Fareeha Khan) Dec 05, 2018

In this live episode, your hosts Taylor (@casualafro) and Eva (@evaandheriud) play some important trivia with a man, share some gems from our favorite commenters, and answer the age-old question: shrimp or sex?

Special thanks to our readers Mo Fry Pasic, Mariah Smith, and Fareeha Khan.

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Hell Yes! This Bitch Walk of Shame’d to the Polls (w/Guy Branum, Samantha Ruddy, Taryn Englehart) Nov 08, 2018

Reductress editors Beth and Eva (@bethnew and @evaandheriud) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Guy Branum (@guybranum), Samantha Ruddy (@samlymatter), and Taryn Englehart (@changawei) read pieces from Reductress, plus we interview a BoyBoss to celebrate his success and learn how he overcame obstacles from being a man in business.

Bad Bitch Alert: Stacy Just Circling Back Per Her Previous Email, was inspired by Irene Merrow. I’m Not Tiny Because I’m Asian. I’m Tiny Because You’re White, was written by Taryn Englehart. Wow! This Woman Turned From Beautiful to Fat Bitch Simply by Rejecting A Man was inspired by Darcy Armstrong. Why My Husband Is Such A BoyBoss was inspired by Lyndsay Rush.

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4 Tasteful Shawls That Say, ‘But You Couldn’t Have Seen My Husband. He Died Years Ago…’ (w/Calise Hawkins, Ayo Edibiri, Karen Chee) Oct 31, 2018

Reductress editors Beth and Sarah (@bethnew and @yourpappalardo) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Ayo Edebiri (@ayoedebiri), Karen Chee (@karencheee), and Calise Hawkins (@CaliseHawkins) read pieces from Reductress, plus we interview a shawl expert to highlight the best of her favorite seasonal fashion statement.

QUIZ: Is He Cute or Is He Just Tall and White?, was written by Victoria Edel. Asian Woman Kindly Corrects Bigot With the More Accurate Racial Slur was written by Karen Chee. How to Get Everyone to Leave You Alone So You Can Watch Your Murders was written by Laura Mulcahy. 4 Tasteful Shawls That Say, ‘But You Couldn’t Have Seen My Husband. He Died Years Ago…’ was written by Rachel Van Nes.

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Women Than Ever Are Running For Office? Um, I’d Rather Run FROM My Office! (w/Blair Socci, Matt Rogers, and Rachel Pegram) Oct 25, 2018

Reductress editors Rachel and Eva (@rachelwenitsky and @evaandherIUD) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Matt Rogers (@MattRogersTho), Rachel Pegram (@rachelpegram), and Blair Socci (@blairsocci) read pieces from Reductress, plus we interview a brave comedian wants to share an inspiring message about voting this November.

Wow! This Woman Is Reaching Out To All The Girls She Bullied In High School To Sell Them Skincare Products, was written by Adrienne Teeley. Not to Brag, But All My Favorite Porn Stars Are Women was inspired by Lizzie Logan. How To Not Take It Personally When Other Women Are in Their Early 20s was written by Heidi Lux. And More Women Than Ever Are Running For Office? Um, I’d Rather Run FROM My Office! was written by Emily Clouse.

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To help support The Reductress Minute, and for exclusive bonus content, visit our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/reductress

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How To Tell Men Apart During Flannel Season (w/Ayo Edibiri, Chelsea Clarke, and Marcia Belsky) Oct 18, 2018

On this week’s episode, Ayo Edebiri (@ayoededebiri), Chelsea Clarke (@chelseaclarke), and Marcia Belsky (@MarciaBelsky) read pieces from Reductress, plus we talk to a woman who lifts weights to get stronger, but also to give some crushing handjobs.

Straight Woman Wondering Who’s the Asshole is in Lesbian Relationship , was inspired by Rachel Clayton. Low-Cal Summer Cocktails That Lookfuc King Pretty an good ughh Boyzz was written by Chelsea Clarke. Why I'm Waiting for the Right Guy To Tell Me To Read Infinite Jest was written by Loretta Donelan. And I Started Lifting Weights to Give Crushing Handjobs was written by Rachel Clayton.

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Why This Woman Stopped Dating Men and Started Following a Herd of Majestic Bison (w/Karen Chee, Jasmine Pierce, Grace Perry) Oct 11, 2018

Reductress editors Beth and Sarah (@bethnew and @yourpappalardo) take you through Hugh Jackman’s Instagram and practice what they’d say to the CBD oil guy. Plus, Karen Chee (@karencheee), Grace Perry (@perryjetaime), and Jasmine Pierce (@jasminepierce) read pieces from Reductress, plus we talk to a woman who stopped dating men and started...following a herd of majestic bison.

Friend Who Texted ‘I’m Just Seeing This Now!’ Awarded Pulitzer Prize In Fiction, was inspired by Alyson D’Lando. How To Explain To Your Children That Daddy Used To Have Cumgutters was written by Grace Perry. How to Wrap Your Pussy in Foil and Put It In The Fridge Since No One’s Eating It was written by Jasmine Pierce. And Why I Stopped Dating Men and Started Following a Herd of Majestic Bison was inspired by Laura Mulcahy.

Thanks to our sponsor, Dame Products - use code "reductress" for 10% off at https://www.dameproducts.com

To help support The Reductress Minute, and for exclusive bonus content, visit our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/reductress

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This Acoustic Cover of Uptown Funk Has a Little Something For Nobody (w/Rachel Bloom, Bowen Yang, Catherine Cohen) May 17, 2018

Reductress editors Rachel and Taylor (@rachelwenitsky and @casualafro) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Rachel Bloom (Crazy Ex-Girlfriend), Catherine Cohen (@cathcohen) and Bowen Yang (@bowenyang) read pieces from Reductress, plus we sing an acoustic cover of Uptown Funk that has a little something for nobody.

How I Made Life In New York Work on a 150,000 Dollar Salary, was written by Loretta Donelan. How To Touch A Naked Man On His Penis was written by Angela Marie DeManti. This Acoustic Cover of Uptown Funk Has a Little Something For Nobody was written by Dima Kronfield.

To help support The Reductress Minute, and for exclusive bonus content, visit our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/reductress

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4 Perfect Smokey Eyes That NO ONE Should EVER Comment On May 03, 2018

Reductress editors Rachel and Sarah (@rachelwenitsky and @yourpappalardo) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Ana Fabrega (@anafabregagood), Patti Harrison (@party_harderson) and George Salazar (@georgesalazar) read pieces from Reductress, plus we talk to a makeup expert who tells us why you should never ever comment on a woman’s smokey eyeshadow.

Daycare Costs More Than I’d Be Making At Work So I Just Let My Children Loose In The Woods, was written by Laura Buchholz. Ass Stinks, Study Find was written by Keysha Whitaker. 4 Smokey Eyes That NO ONE Should EVER Comment On was written by Eva Victor.

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“Badass” is Out, “Beef Woman” Is In! Apr 26, 2018

Reductress editors Rachel and Beth (@rachelwenitsky and @bethnewell) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Ziwe Fumodoh (@ziwe), Shannon O’Neill (@spotastic) and Alise Morales (@alisenavidad) read pieces from Reductress, plus we invented a time traveling tampon that allowed us to talk to Mary Queen of Scots about the time a portrait artist made her look fat in a painting.

I Love Pizza, Which Is Adorable Because I’m Hot, was written by Margaret Spencer. I’m Not Political (Because I Assume I Will Retain My Privileges Forever) was written by Sarah Bernstein. I’m Not A Feminist, But I Do Think All Men Should Die was written by Hannah LoPatin.

Reductress is live at Caroline’s on Broadway 4/26-28 - get tickets: http://www.carolines.com/comedian/reductress/

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To help support The Reductress Minute, and for exclusive bonus content, visit our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/reductress

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Is He a Real Man, or a Tall Ferret? Apr 12, 2018

Reductress editors Sarah and Taylor (@yourpappalardo and @casualafro) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Hannah Solow (@hamstertalk), Mary Houlihan (@maryhoulie) and Cissy Jones (@cissyspeaks) read pieces from Reductress, plus we talk to Taylor’s mom on the air and discuss relationship issues with a woman who is definitely dating a tall ferret.

Becoming a Mother Made Me Happy, Fulfilled (Although Chris Said He was Going to Pull Out) was written by Laurel Cummings. How to Explain Memes to your Therapist was written by Sami Main. I’m Not Here for the Craft Beer, I’m Here for the Dick was written by Kathy Lynch.

Reductress is live at Caroline’s on Broadway 4/26-28 - get tickets: http://www.carolines.com/comedian/reductress/

Thanks to our sponsor, Dame Products - use code "reductress" for 10% off at https://www.dameproducts.com

To help support The Reductress Minute, and for exclusive bonus content, visit our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/reductress

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The Butts Episode Apr 05, 2018

Reductress editors Beth and Eva (@bethnew and @evaandheriud) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Shalewa Sharpe (Fallon), Joel Kim Booster (Comedy Central) and Grace Perry (The Onion) read pieces from Reductress, plus we talk about what we love about Dobby from Harry Potter and talk about intern Miranda’s tough, tough asshole.

We Call It A Book Club, But All We Do Is Drink Wine and Worship The Devil was written by Laura Buchholz. Man with Gender Studies Degree Terrorizes Party was written by Joel Kim Booster. I Fucked Him Just to Get those Cargo Shorts off was written by Grace Perry.

Reductress is live at Caroline’s on Broadway 4/26-28 - get tickets: http://www.carolines.com/comedian/reductress/

Thanks to our sponsor, Dame Products - use code "reductress" for 10% off at https://www.dameproducts.com

To help support The Reductress Minute, and for exclusive bonus content, visit our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/reductress

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Sex and the City Fans! Which One Are You—Sex or The City? Mar 29, 2018

Reductress editors Rachel and Sarah (@rachelwenitsky and @yourpappalardo) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Shalyah Evans (MTV’s Girl Code) Monique Moses (IFC’s Comedy Cribs) and Samantha Reece read pieces from Reductress, plus Rachel tries a standing toilet, and talks to a lesbian bridal party that’s entirely made up of exes!

Sorry I Didn’t Respond To Your Text, I Get Overwhelmed By Simple Tasks was written by Taryn Englehart. Self-Deprecating Intros for When You Call 911 was written by Anna Drezen. My Skin is So Thirsty, It Fucked My Upstairs Neighbor was written by Hannah Solow and the Reductress editors. Thanks to Taylor Garron, Beth Newell, and Miranda Kronfeld for help on this episode.

Reductress is live at Caroline’s on Broadway 4/26-28 - get tickets: bit.ly/2GGFlye

Thanks to our sponsor, Dame Products - use code "reductress" for 10% off at https://www.dameproducts.com

To help support The Reductress Minute, and for exclusive bonus content, visit our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/reductress

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Study Finds It’s Still Annoying When Brian Says the Right Things About Male Privilege (w/Marcia Belsky, Suni Reyes, Becky Chicoine) Mar 21, 2018

Reductress editors Rachel and Beth (@rachelwenitsky and @bethnew) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Marcia Belsky (@marciabelsky) and Suni Reyes (@sunireyes) read pieces from Reductress, plus we talk to Reductress’ badass aggregating algorithm Stacybot, pitch our ideas for female driven ensemble TV series, and learn how to make a March Madness bracket that ends with us living on a vineyard with Timothee Chalamet.

Has Feminism Gone Too Far Now That It’s Specifically Critiquing Me? was written by Marcia Belsky. Study Finds It’s Still Annoying When Brian Says the Right Things About Male Privilege was written by Miranda Kronfeld. I Didn’t Take His Last Name Because I’m a Feminist And Also It’s Butt was written by Courtney Paige Barnett. How To Make a March Madness Bracket That Ends With You Living on a Vineyard With Timothee Chalamet was written by Emma Dudley.

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To help support The Reductress Minute, and for exclusive bonus content, visit our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/reductress

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Meet The American Girl Doll Who Wants To Make Sure Addy Knows How ‘Woke’ She Is (w/Jenny Hagel, Catherine Cohen, Matt Rogers) Mar 15, 2018

Reductress editors Rachel and Taylor (@rachelwenitsky and @casualafro) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Jenny Hagel (@jennyhagel), Matt Rogers (@mattrogerstho), and Catherine Cohen (@catccohen) read pieces from Reductress, plus we try to talk Spring fashion, read our hate-mail and talk to a teen expert who tells us that teens are NOT bleaching bears.

I Can’t Believe This Country Is So Racist, Reports Employee of All White Start-Up was written by Rekha Shankar. Are Teens Trying the Dangerous New Trend of Bear Bleaching? No. was written by Miranda Kronfeld.

Thanks to our sponsor, Dame Products - use code "reductress" for 10% off at https://www.dameproducts.com

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To help support The Reductress Minute, and for exclusive bonus content, visit our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/reductress

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Wow! This Beautiful Woman Won’t Shut Up And Take The Compliment (w/George Salazar, Bowen Yang, and Chelsea Clarke) Mar 07, 2018

Reductress editors Rachel and Eva (@rachelwenitsky and @evaandherIUD) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, George Salazar (@georgesalazar), Bowen Yang (@bowenyang), and Chelsea Clarke (@chelseaclarke) read pieces from Reductress, plus we try to predict the future, talk to a beautiful woman who won’t take a fucking compliment and play voicemails from deranged Reductress fanatic Aubrey Plaza.

My Boyfriend Ate Pineapple For a Week and Now His Dick Is Covered In Bees was written by Grace Perry, How To Tell If Your Bridesmaids Are Fucking Snitches was written by Chelsea Clarke, and I’m Sick of Being Paid Less Because I Am A Teacup Pig was written by Laura Mulcahy. Wow! This Beautiful Woman Won’t Shut Up and Take The Fucking Compliment was written by Carolina Wood.

Thanks to our sponsor, Dame Products - use code "reductress" for 10% off at https://www.dameproducts.com

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To help support The Reductress Minute, and for exclusive bonus content, visit our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/reductress

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This Fuckboy Ghost Still Won’t Cross Over For Girlfriend (w/Jena Friedman, Ana Fabrega, Taryn Englehart) Mar 01, 2018

Reductress editors Rachel and Sarah (@rachelwenitsky and @yourpappalardo) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Taryn Englehart (@changawei), Ana Fabrega (@anafabragagood), and Jena Friedman (@jenafriedman), read pieces from Reductress, plus we take our birth control pills, talk about our big dumb bodies, and tell our listeners what makes us feel “seen”.

I Don’t Dress For Men, I Dress For the Sea Witch That Cursed Me was written by Jasmine Pierce, IMDB to Add “Yiiiiiiikes, FYI” Section To All Existing Profiles was written by Grace Perry, and What To Do When Your 23andMe Informs You That You’re Gimli, Son of Gloin was written by Andrew Martin. Thanks to Annie Griggs for our episode title Fuckboy Ghost Still Won’t Cross Over For Girlfriend.

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Dermatologists Hate Her! This Woman Is Really Mean to Dermatologists (w/Mara Wilson, Jasmine Pierce, Patti Harrison) Feb 21, 2018

This week, Reductress editors (@rachelwenitsky and @bethnew) take you through the week’s hottest stories. On this week’s episode, Patti Harrison (@partyharderson), Jasmine Pierce (@jasminecomedy), and Mara Wilson (@marawilson), read pieces from Reductress, plus we prank call Katie Couric, get a really sweet shout-out from our bestie Janeane Garofalo, and shout out to all our fans that are “literally dead” right now.

Fuckboy Blossoms Into Fuckman was written by April Lavalle, and special thanks to Damien Kronfeld for our episode title, Dermatologists Hate Her! This Woman Is Really Mean to Dermatologists.

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