The Parenting Reframe

Latest Episodes:

How to Gain Cooperation from your Children Mar 29, 2023

Show notes

In this mini episode we are discussing two simple shifts that can help gain your kiddos cooperation. This episode is packed with examples of how to help you get off the Repeat and Warning train which eventually leads to yelling and feeling guilty. We go over the framework on how to help be consistent and get your kiddos to cooperate, toddlers to teenagers.

We discuss how to get your children to cooperate :

Why repeating ourselves is not helpful.
How being triggered affects our frustration.
Understanding how you are responding to the situation is helpful in changing it.
Why you end up yelling to get your children to listen.
Why constantly repeating yourself leads to your kiddos realize you are not following through on what you are saying.
Pinpoint what it is that you keep repeating over and over, then come up with an action to assign with the direction you are giving.
The difference between time out and taking a break.
We go over an example of how to practice being consistent with your words.
A parent’s biggest superpower is staying calm.
Why validating their emotion is important, from toddlers to teenagers.
The problem with inconsistent responses.
Why it’s ok if your child is not happy all the time.
Reasons why having a coach is so helpful.
It can take a few times to help shift behaviors, being consistent is key.
There is a different framework for helping each child, this goes all the way up to teenagers.
Why you have to have a game plan.
Boundaries are love! Get off the repeat and warning train!

Resources:

Make sure to sign up for the 45 min Stop the Whining, and start connecting Workshop on April 4th https://theparentingreframe.com/whining-workshop/

I hope you found this episode helpful; for more parenting tips, check out my website and blog for more information. https://theparentingreframe.com/

Make sure to sign up for my weekly newsletter and get other free resources. https://theparentingreframe.com/free-resources/

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe/

If you would like a personalized approach to help reframe how you parent, check out my coaching options https://theparentingreframe.com/parent-coaching-packages/

The Parenting Reframe Podcast is edited by JAG Podcast Productions: https://jagpodcastproductions.com/

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

How to Respond to Whining Mar 15, 2023

Show notes

We are talking about how to respond to whining in this episode. Some of my most popular posts were on whining, so I wanted to dig deeper into dealing with it. It can be extremely triggering for parents, so we will go over ways to pause, acknowledge, respond, and reflect on how we respond to whining. I will give you some helpful exercises to help with the whining. I will also do a 60-minute workshop at the end of the month that you won’t want to miss, where we will go a little deeper!

We discuss how to deal with whining:

How whining is so triggering, myself included!
How whining is two-fold, we get triggered but still have to deal with the behavior.
Why we need to pay attention to our own triggers and how we respond.
How to move from reactive to responsible parenting.
You are not separate from your child; it’s always an interaction resulting in some type of behavior.
We don’t want to place blame, just the recognition that we all play a part. How understanding this will help your family grow for the better.
How to use PARR (Pause, Acknowledge, Respond, Reflect) to help with whining.
Name your behavior when your child starts to whine.
Why not giving a consistent response isn’t helping.
Why having a tool is essential to help you pause in stressful moments.
How I thought of whining kids before I had children; spoiled, bratty, or entitled.
Once I realized my trigger, how I was able to change how I responded to whining.
You will make mistakes when dealing with triggers; just reset and try again.
Whining is a secondary behavior to something else.
How to do a parenting audit.
- When does the whining happen: time of day, near nap time, are they hungry, etc.?
- Is it in response to something?
- Find out the context of what is causing the whining.
I will have a 60-minute workshop on whining at the end of March. Make sure you are on my email list so you will be the first to know when registration opens.
3 different activities to help practice to help deal with whining when it’s not happening.

Books referenced in the episode:

Raising Lions - Joe Newman - https://www.raisinglions.com/
Good Inside - Dr. Becky - https://www.goodinside.com/book/

Resources:

Make sure to sign up for my newsletter so you will be the first to be able to register for my 60-minute Whining Workshop at the end of March!

I hope you found this episode helpful; for more parenting tips, check out my website and blog for more information. https://theparentingreframe.com/

Make sure to sign up for my weekly newsletter and get other free resources. https://theparentingreframe.com/free-resources/

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe/

If you would like a personalized approach to help reframe how you parent, check out my coaching options https://theparentingreframe.com/parent-coaching-packages/

The Parenting Reframe Podcast is edited by JAG Podcast Productions: https://jagpodcastproductions.com/

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Infertility and Adoption Mar 01, 2023

Show notes

We are talking with Megan Accardo, a good friend, great business coach, and wonderful mom. She tells us all about her journey from infertility to adoption, to finally being a mom to baby Kylee. So many women are going through similar situations and Megan wants to help them know that they are not alone. She goes into her IVF journey, loss, and the decision on how she finally becomes a mom. I am so excited for you to hear this episode, Megan has some wonderful advice on how she navigated her long journey to becoming a mother.

Megan’s Journey with IVF and adoption:

Megan talks about her 9-year journey with IVF and infertility.
She talks about her health journey along the way.
How it was harder not knowing why she couldn’t get pregnant.
The practice she did to handle not being able to carry a child.
How it came down to 2 choices for motherhood.
Her journey with the adoption process and the stresses of getting there.
The stress of the 10-day grace period for final adoption.
The exciting homecoming of baby Kylee
Do you have a baby shower when you adopt, and other questions?
How important it is to have a community.
The transition of going back to work with a baby.
Megan gives some advice to anyone who is going through the same things.
How can you let go of how it was supposed to be.

Learn more about Megan:

Power Your Purpose Podcast: https://www.meganaccardo.com/poweryourpurpose

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/meganaccardo

Website: https://www.meganaccardo.com/

Pod Party: https://coaching.meganaccardo.com/pod-party

Resources:

Friday March 3rd at 1 pm EST is my first live workshop - The Taming Tantrums Workshop. It will be 90 mins where you get answers to your tantrum questions and learn how to get through this incredibly challenging phase of parenting. If you can’t make it live, don’t worry…you will have access to the full recording afterward! Plus time for Q&As, Copy of Tacking Tantrums and Challenging Behaviours E-Book along with 2 bonuses. You don’t want to miss it!

I hope you found this episode helpful; for more parenting tips, check out my website and blog for more information. https://theparentingreframe.com/

Make sure to sign up for my weekly newsletter and get other free resources. https://theparentingreframe.com/free-resources/

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe/

If you would like a personalized approach to help reframe how you parent, check out my coaching options

https://theparentingreframe.com/parent-coaching-packages/

The Parenting Reframe Podcast is edited by JAG Podcast Productions: https://jagpodcastproductions.com/

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

How to Respond to a Tantrum Feb 15, 2023

Show notes

We will be discussing how to respond to tantrums in this episode. I did a recent post on tantrums and I talked about the three things not to do during a tantrum and I got a lot of questions on this. So this episode I am going over 5 questions that were asked. I am going over ways to help during a tantrum and also things I have learned to change in how I handle situations. I hope you enjoy it! Please excuse my dog in the background, dogs have tantrums too!

How to Respond to Tantrums:

3 things not to do during a tantrum and why.
Why we want to hold space for our kiddo during a tantrum.
Why it’s important for kiddos to regulate their emotions and the effects it has on them.
Ways to help during a tantrum.
Make sure you are on my email list so that you can sign up for my first-ever Live workshop on tantrums, the information comes out this week!
How to handle tantrums around 15 months. A little different than when they are 3.
How framing the situation before a tantrum is helpful.
How using PARR (Pause, Acknowledge, Respond, Reflect) during tantrums can help cope with the situation easier.
Why keeping your calm is essential for your kiddo during a tantrum.
Advice for a teacher on how to handle tantrums in the classroom.
How I handled tantrums in the classroom in my past years of teaching.
Great quote from Dr. Becky Kennedy, author of Good Inside, Don't necessarily parent to be fair, parent the needs of your child.
Techniques to calm down during a tantrum.
The Starfish breathing to help stay calm during a tantrum or after.
Why I don’t like the saying “Use your words”.

Resources:

Make sure you are on my email list so that you can sign up for my first-ever Live workshop on tantrums, the information comes out this week!

Check out Episode 7 with how to use the starfish method with my good friend Harmony Slater.

I hope you found this episode helpful; for more parenting tips, check out my website and blog for more information. https://theparentingreframe.com/

Make sure to sign up for my weekly newsletter and get other free resources. https://theparentingreframe.com/free-resources/

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe/

If you would like a personalized approach to help reframe how you parent, check out my coaching options https://theparentingreframe.com/parent-coaching-packages/

The Parenting Reframe Podcast is edited by JAG Podcast Productions: https://jagpodcastproductions.com/

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Tips to Help Picky Eaters Feb 01, 2023

Show notes

In this episode, we are discussing picky eaters and tips to help with my friend and colleague Amy Hengstebeck, Director of Occupational Therapy at the Kaufman Children’s Center. She has expertise in feeding therapy, so I thought she would be the perfect person to bring on the show to talk about why our kids are picky eaters. She has some great tips to understand why and ways to help get them to try and eat new foods.

Tips to help picky eaters:

Why kids around 18 months - 2 years usually become picky.
When picky eating becomes more of a problem.
Sensory can be a big part of picky eating: different textures of foods, choking issues from certain foods, etc.
How parents' reactions can help kids be picky.
Why letting your baby be messy while eating is helpful.
Some tips on spoon feeding to make it easier.
When to start feeding meats and the foods you eat.
Why do kids like crunchy carb food so much?
How bringing some fun and silliness in helping kids understand different food is helpful.
Ways to help bring new foods to your kiddos with play, little changes at a time.
Tips on introducing new foods to a picky eater.
Kids like predictability, so that can be harder with fruits and vegetables.
When should the sippy cups go away, and tips on how to do it?

Resources:

I hope you found this episode helpful; for more parenting tips, check out my website and blog for more information. https://theparentingreframe.com/

Make sure to sign up for my weekly newsletter and get other free resources. https://theparentingreframe.com/free-resources/

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe/

If you would like a personalized approach to help reframe how you parent, check out my coaching options https://theparentingreframe.com/parent-coaching-packages/

The Parenting Reframe Podcast is edited by JAG Podcast Productions: https://jagpodcastproductions.com/

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Why You Don’t Want Your Child to Be Happy All the Time Jan 18, 2023

Show notes

In this episode, we discuss why we don’t want our children to be always happy. There will be hard times in our kiddos’ lives, and we need to sit with them, help them process their feelings, and learn the lessons it is teaching them. The hardest thing as a mom is to make everything better for our children, from toddlers to adults, no matter how old they are. In doing this, we are not allowing them to grow from the lessons. I am reframing ways how we can do this. It’s not easy. I personally know this, but our kids need to sit in the emotions and learn from the hard times instead of, as the parent, always trying to make it better.

Reasons why you don’t want your children to always be happy:

Ask yourself what’s wrong with not being happy all the time?
We teach kids to avoid and run away from hard things.
Why it’s not helpful to not process the hard things
The reasons why I want my kids to learn how to deal with the hard things.
Why we want our kids to look at hard situations and see what they can take from the problems to grow from it
Ways that you can reframe how to talk about challenging situations with your kids, even when you are as upset as they are
Help them learn the lesson they can take from the situation, and reframe it positively
When we just want to make our kids, we are creating a co-dependency.
What happens when they aren’t having a good time, they won’t want to tell you to make you feel bad.
Why coming from a place of neutrality is vital for our kids and how it can help them work through the struggle.
Why we can’t make bad feelings the bad guy.
One of the hardest parts of being a parent is the restraint to let your kids go through hard times, but they need to sit with it and learn from it.
Take the time to see how you handle hard emotions as an adult.

Resources:

I hope you found this episode helpful; for more parenting tips, check out my website and blog for more information. https://theparentingreframe.com/

Make sure to sign up for my weekly newsletter and get other free resources. https://theparentingreframe.com/free-resources/

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe/

If you would like a personalized approach to help reframe how you parent, check out my coaching options https://theparentingreframe.com/parent-coaching-packages/

The Parenting Reframe Podcast is edited by JAG Podcast Productions: https://jagpodcastproductions.com/

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

How to Handle Tantrums in Public Jan 04, 2023

Show notes

In this episode, we are going to dive a little deeper into how to handle tantrums in public. I will give some different solutions and ways to approach this problem. This is a common issue that we all have. I go over how to take the time to see how we handle tantrums at home and ways to handle these situations in public.

Tips for handling tantrums in public:

The difference between tantrums in public vs tantrums at home.
Parents feel very exposed when tantrums happen in public, the reactions will change compared to at home.
Why your energy level is heightened in a public setting and how your child notices this.
Why asking yourself how you handle tantrums at home will help when you are in public.
The difference between secondary re-enforcement vs. redirecting.
The reasons why you want your kiddos to have tantrums at home; make sure you have empathy and are holding space for the tantrums.
There are certain times when it’s good to redirect your child’s behavior.
Tips on how to handle situations when you know that a tantrum will happen.
Frame the situation ahead of time with scripts to help avoid a tantrum, grab my freebie, How to Get your kids to listen, to help with this.
How to handle your kids from not hitting or throwing, why time outs aren’t my favorite for this.
Why talking during a tantrum does not help.

Resources:

Here is the link to join The Parenting Reset, which will start on January 13th, there are only two spots left.

https://theparentingreframe.com/the-parenting-program/

I hope you found this episode helpful; for more parenting tips, check out my website and blog for more information. https://theparentingreframe.com/

Make sure to sign up for my weekly newsletter and get other free resources. https://theparentingreframe.com/free-resources/

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe/

If you would like a personalized approach to help reframe how you parent, check out my coaching options https://theparentingreframe.com/parent-coaching-packages/

The Parenting Reframe Podcast is edited by JAG Podcast Productions: https://jagpodcastproductions.com/

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Tips For A Less Stressful Holiday Dec 21, 2022

Show notes

The holidays can be a stressful time, especially for your children who are used to their routines. We want a perfect holiday, but sometimes we need to adjust our expectations of how that looks. Here are some tips on helping you enjoy the holidays a little bit more.

Tips for a less stressful holiday:

Adjust your expectations of how the holidays should look.
Don’t force the thank you. They do not understand why.
Let them know why they should be thankful, and model it for them.
Tips on how you can say thank you after the fact.
Consider where and what you are saying yes to.
Check in with yourself on what really matters, not trying to have everything perfect. Make a list of have-to’s and then what you tell yourself has to be done but doesn’t.
Try to stick to a schedule. It’s ok if you can’t. Don’t beat yourself up.
Have a grounding practice to help stay calm. Check out Ep 7 for more tips on this from my friend Harmony Slater.
Don’t add more to your plate; look to simplify things. Even a 2 min meditation can help. Whatever works best for you.
Starfish breathing benefits kids when they need to relax or start the day.
At the end of the day, anchor yourself and look back at 3 things that were wins that day.

Resources:

Here is the link to join The Parenting Reset, which will start on January 13th, there are only a few spots left.

https://theparentingreframe.com/the-parenting-program/

Check out Episode 7 with Harmony Slater on how to help stay calm. This is a good one to listen to this time of year.

https://theparentingreframe.com/podcast-episodes/episode-7-tools-to-help-parents-and-kids-manage-stress-with-harmony-slater/

Here is the app I use for mediation.

https://apps.apple.com/us/app/the-breathing-app/id1285982210

I hope you found this episode helpful; for more parenting tips, check out my website and blog for more information. https://theparentingreframe.com/

Make sure to sign up for my weekly newsletter and get other free resources. https://theparentingreframe.com/free-resources/

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe/

If you would like a personalized approach to help reframe how you parent, check out my coaching options https://theparentingreframe.com/parent-coaching-packages/

The Parenting Reframe Podcast is edited by JAG Podcast Productions: https://jagpodcastproductions.com/

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The 5 Things I Would Never Do as a Parenting Coach Dec 07, 2022

Show notes

MetroParent asked me to write an article on The 5 Things I Would Never Do as a Parenting Coach, and I thought it would be fun to join the TikTok trend. I go over my top 5, and ways to reframe the situation to help you and your kiddos thrive.

The 5 Things I Would Never Do as a Parenting Coach:

Why I don’t make kiddos apologize for their behaviors.
We go over why this is not teaching your children empathy.
Even though your child’s behavior is not always great, this does not mean you have a bad kid or are doing a bad job as a parent.
Why I will never feel afraid of making mistakes as a parent.
How to use the 80/20 rule when you feel bad for yelling at your child.
Why using the moments when you aren’t doing your best parenting is the perfect time to help teach your child about how to reset and repair the situation.
Why giving yourself grace is so essential for you and your kiddo.
Why confidence is gained through competence.
It’s hard, but we must let our kids go through struggles.
What experience stacking is and why it’s important.
5 - 6-year-olds should have better coping skills and fewer tantrums; if not, they just need extra help dealing with difficult situations.
How I still have a hard time not stepping in to help with my grown children.
Why I never try to control the outcome.
Your child’s path may be very different from what you expected. Pay attention to the reasons why.
I tell a story from a professor from my college days about why giving our kids the space to learn works and is important for the learning process.
Why I would never parent from a rigid place.

Resources:

MetroParent article - The 5 Things I Would Never Do as a Parenting Coach - https://www.metroparent.com/parenting/advice/what-a-parenting-coach-would-never-do/

Here is the link to join The Parenting Reset, which will start in January.

https://theparentingreframe.com/the-parenting-program/

I hope you found this episode helpful; for more parenting tips, check out my website and blog for more information. https://theparentingreframe.com/

Make sure to sign up for my weekly newsletter and get other free resources. https://theparentingreframe.com/free-resources/

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe/

If you would like a personalized approach to help reframe how you parent, check out my coaching options https://theparentingreframe.com/parent-coaching-packages/

The Parenting Reframe Podcast is edited by JAG Podcast Productions: https://jagpodcastproductions.com/

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Why It’s Hard to Stay Calm as a Parent Nov 23, 2022

Show notes

Staying calm as a parent isn’t always easy, I go over 3 of the reasons I see the most with this. It’s so important to discover triggers and blocks that you have to help reframe how to stay calm during stressful situations as a parent. We will go over this and so much more!

What we cover on why it’s hard to stay calm as a parent:

Why understanding your parenting triggers is so important in helping to stay calm.
What my trigger was when my children were young and how I reframed it.
How using my PARR method helps with dealing with your parenting trigger.
Question yourself about how you stay calm when triggered; this will help how you address the behavior
Work on identifying your parenting block, the things you tell yourself about how to be a good parent.
Having a demanding job does not mean you are doing a bad job as a parent.
Get clear on what you and your family really need.
Why I do what I do as a parenting coach.
There have been two very different parent camps, very judgemental and list to follow or the free-spirited, with no structure.
Why you shouldn’t be ashamed that your child is lying.
Why being able to get a handle on your ability to stay calm helps you to be a better parent.
You can only work on how you respond to what you can’t control.

Resources:

Here is the link to join The Parenting Reset, which will start in January.

https://theparentingreframe.com/the-parenting-program/

I hope you found this episode helpful; for more parenting tips, check out my website and blog for more information. https://theparentingreframe.com/

Make sure to sign up for my weekly newsletter and get other free resources. https://theparentingreframe.com/free-resources/

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe/

If you would like a personalized approach to help reframe how you parent, check out my coaching options

https://theparentingreframe.com/parent-coaching-packages/

The Parenting Reframe Podcast is edited by JAG Podcast Productions: https://jagpodcastproductions.com/

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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