Stay ConnectedAn award-winning, critically acclaimed mockumentary podcast that follows fictional Premier League club Ashwood City FC.
‘The Thick of it meets Fifa career mode – a must listen for football fans’ – The Guardian
‘Ultra-sharp satire’ – GQ
This podcast is a serial, begin at Episode 1.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Ashwood City take on Leeds United in the first league meeting between the two since 2004. Chief Executive Patrick Nolan has had to make slight adjustments to Dartley Park, in order to welcome the Premier League newcomers.
Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan
Helena Doughty as Jess Tate
Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall
John Brannoch as Colin Walsh
Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton
Additional Voices
Joel Emery
Lynnette Shaw
Directed by:
Adam Jarrell
Episode written by:
Joel Emery
Edited by:
Adam Jarrell
Executive Producer:
Joel Emery
With thanks to:
The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders
WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.
This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.
Listener discretion is advised.
The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Fresh from the International Break as well as the possibility of 'Project Big Picture', Patrick Nolan embarks on his own project as he attempts to put the final nail in the coffin of the Ashwood City Youth Academy, albeit with a little help from some friends in low places.
Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan
Helena Doughty as Jess Tate
Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall
Additional Voices
Joel Emery
Directed by:
Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery
Episode written by:
Joel Emery
Edited by:
Adam Jarrell
Executive Producer:
Joel Emery
With thanks to:
The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders
WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.
This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.
Listener discretion is advised.
The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Following the decision to publish false positive COVID-19 test results for Kieran Broom and Kyle Francis-Clarke ahead of England duty; Chief Executive Patrick Nolan is now dealing with the fallout. Determined to get his fixture pile-up resolved, Patrick reaches out to an old ally of the club in an effort to force the hand of the football powers-that-be.
Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan
Helena Doughty as Jess Tate
Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall
Rachel Teate as Dame Georgina Pitt
Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton
Additional Voices
Joel Emery
Directed by:
Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery
Episode written by:
Joel Emery
Edited by:
Adam Jarrell
Executive Producer:
Joel Emery
With thanks to:
The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders
WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.
This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.
Listener discretion is advised.
The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
For matchweek three of the Premier League; Ashwood City take their perfect record to Craven Cottage. Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall and Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan, however, have other social commitments.
Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan
Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall
Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber
Directed by:
Adam Jarrell
Episode written by:
Joel Emery
Edited by:
Adam Jarrell
Executive Producer:
Joel Emery
With thanks to:
The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders
WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.
This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.
Listener discretion is advised.
The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Following a bright start to the league campaign, Ashwood City now face Portsmouth in the second round of the Carabao Cup. Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall is charged with the task of securing an ambitious feeder club for Ashwood City. Patrick and Jess however are distracted by the latest new recruit...
Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan
Helena Doughty as Jess Tate
Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall
Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison
John Brannoch as Colin Walsh
Additional Voices
Joel Emery
Directed by:
Adam Jarrell
Episode written by:
Joel Emery
Edited by:
Joel Emery
Executive Producer:
Joel Emery
With thanks to:
The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders
WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.
This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.
Listener discretion is advised.
The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Premier League football returns as Ashwood City take on Crystal Palace in Matchweek 1 of the new season. With COVID-19 restrictions in place; Dartley Park remains closed to the fans. Chief Executive Patrick Nolan's endeavours to increase matchday revenue for the club lead him to a fan engagement initiative using cardboard cutout selfies to attend the fixture.
Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan
Helena Doughty as Jess Tate
Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall
Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison
John Brannoch as Colin Walsh
Rachel Teate as Karen
Lucinda Shaw as Christine Williams
Matt Jansen as himself
Additional Voices
Joel Emery
Directed by:
Adam Jarrell
Episode written by:
Joel Emery
Edited by:
Adam Jarrell
Executive Producer:
Joel Emery
With thanks to:
The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders
WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.
This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.
Listener discretion is advised.
The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
It's the Semi-Final of the Europa League. Ashwood City take on FC Internazionale as the isolated tournament in Germany moves ever-closer to its climax. Once again, however, the mood in the camp is delicately poised to see the loan saga of Christian Akuffo resolved.
Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom
Esmonde Cole as Kyle Francis Clark
Acushla-Tara Cupe as Dr Rachel Webber
Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton
Isi Adeola as Christian Akuffo
David Letemple Leroy as Antoine
Additional voices
Joel Emery
Casting Director:
Kirsty Gillmore
Directed by:
Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery
Episode written by:
Joel Emery
Edited by:
Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery
Executive Producer:
Joel Emery
WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.
This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.
Listener discretion is advised.
The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Ashwood's first leg in the round of 16 ended 1-0 to Ashwood in Wolfsburg back in March. Now, along with fellow UEFA Europa League competitors, they find themselves vying for a place in the Quarter Final held in Germany under strict quarantine conditions.
Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom
Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber
Esmonde Cole as Kyle Francis-Clarke
Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton
Additional Voices:
Joel Emery
Directed by:
Adam Jarrell
Episode written by:
Joel Emery
Edited by:
Adam Jarrell
Executive Producer:
Joel Emery
WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.
This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.
Listener discretion is advised.
The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Premier League survival hangs in the balance as Ashwood City take on Manchester United in the final game of the season.
The Offensive will return at the start of the 2020/2021 season. Thank you for your continued support. Visit ashwoodcity.com and patreon.com/ashwoodcity for more.
Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan
Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall
Helena Doughty as Jess Tate
Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison
Esmonde Cole as Kyle Francis-Clarke
Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes
Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber
Peter Drury as Himself
Additional Voices:
Joel Emery
Ant McGinley
Owen Maers
Directed by:
Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery
Episode written by:
Joel Emery
Edited by:
Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery
Executive Producer:
Joel Emery
"Gravitated" by Edgar Hopp
WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.
This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.
Listener discretion is advised.
The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
It's the final week of the season, and the battle for Premier League survival hits boiling point as Ashwood City travel to Villa Park. Can The Superwhites continue their run of good form under Interim Head Coach Matt Jansen in their penultimate game of the season?
Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan
Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall
Helena Doughty as Jess Tate
Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison
Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes
Additional Voices:
Jo Price
Joel Emery
Lucinda Shaw
Directed by:
Adam Jarrell & Joel Emery
Episode written by:
Joel Emery
Edited by:
Adam Jarrell and Joel Emery
Executive Producer:
Joel Emery
WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.
This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.
Listener discretion is advised.
The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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