This is a podcast for Christian women like you to come take a breather from all the things they need to be doing for their families. Let’s hit the pause button, clear the noise, and shift our focus back on God so that you can find the grace & truth you need to do the work He has for you today.
#027: How to Cultivate a Heart of Gratitude All Year Around, Not Just on Thanksgiving
Nov 22, 2017
Show notes
Thanksgiving is easy to do when the season calls for it, but what about the rest of the year? Tune in to this episode for 2 simple + practical steps on how to have a changed and grateful heart all year round.
#026: Drops of Grace in Trials & Suffering with Katie (I Choose Brave)
Nov 17, 2017
Show notes
Katie of I Choose Brave opens up about her journey through a pregnancy loss and how even though it was hard, she'd found no lack of God's Grace through it all.
#025: How to Uproot the Lies in Our Thought Closets: A Guide to Guard Our Minds
Nov 13, 2017
Show notes
Disclosure: Some of the links on this site may be affiliated which means I earn a commission at no cost to you should you make a purchase via the link. All opinions are 100% my own.
Do you have a lot of weeds in your thought closet?
As I was pulling weeds in our strawberry garden, I was thinking how I had A LOT of weeds to pull. The weeds saw the opportunity to take roots as soon as it got warmer, they sprouted up and soaked up every drop of water and sunshine. They grew strong and tall, before I knew it I had an abundance of weeds.
If you think about it, our minds work the same. One "little" lie takes root in our minds, if we don't uproot it and replace it with truth, it will grow strong and soon enough it will go into seed, spreading the little lie into a big garden of lies.
And you know what happens to the plants surrounding the now-strong weeds? They get choked to death, pretty much, by these weeds. If we ignore the lies in our thought closet, they will grow strong and kill all the sound truths we have.
How to Identify the Lies
Investigate your sins - Your sins are great indicators for what lies you're believing in. The sins we commit are the fruit of the lies rooted in our hearts. By taking a really good at our lies, we should be able to work backwards and find out what started it all.
For example, my husband works really long hours. I've been hoping and praying for a new job for him for a long time. I started to get frustrated when he was still at this long-hour job; I wanted to push all the new opportunities in his face. And when he said no, I would get irritated and depressed.
"We're never getting out of this season!" "Doesn't he want to be home more often?!" "He doesn't care about us!" These are the lies that would float in my head.
Investigating my irritation and depression, it became more apparent to me that my hope lied in this "new job". If only Grant would get a new job, our life would look a lot better. While a new job might have Grant home more, there's no guarantee! My hope lied in an earthly perishable thing instead of in God who's faithful and is the Provider!
Knowing what lie was rooted in my heart helped me use Scripture to uproot the lie and set my heart back on track.
Know the Truth - You don't know what's false unless you know what's true. I love Jen Wilkin's illustration about this: the FBI agents are to sit down and really study the real bills. They know the real ones so well, so inside out, that when they encounter a counterfeit they know instantly it's a fake. That's how we ought to be with God's Word. We need to immerse ourselves in God's Word and grow in it so much so that when Satan tries to whisper lies to us we know instantly he's speaking nonsense.
As busy women, especially if you're a wife and/or a mom, finding time to really study the Word is probably a struggle for you. If that's you, don't be discouraged, there are lots of tools that can help you. At Everleigh, for instance, we have bite-sized Bible Study Guides that you can use for 5-10 minutes a day for your daily Bible reading. It's short and sweet but deep and meaningful. It will shift your eyes from self to God; from Satan's lies to God's truth. Let this Bible Study tool help you grow in God's Word so whenever the father of lies tries to deceive you, you know instantly it's a lie.
Do you have weeds in your thought closet that you need to kill RIGHT NOW? What truths do you need to replace the lies with?
#024: Are You an Angry Mom? Two Reasons Why We Discipline Out of Anger
Nov 09, 2017
Show notes
Here is my confession: I'm an angry mom.
Well. I want to say I'm a recovering angry mom. I know I get angry a lot around my children and I'm trying to surrender my anger. Now that I have that off my chest, what about you?!
Are you an angry mom?
Do you yell at them more than you talk to them gently? Do you display annoyance or irritation more than you display affection? If someone were to broadcast your interactions with your kids, would they cringe or would they see a display of God's grace and truth?
I believe we all love our children; we would do anything to give them the best. So why do we struggle with being kind to our children, whom we love so dearly?
I believe it's because we are self-focused.
My Kids Are In The Way of What I Want
Okay, probably no one actually says that out loud. But if you think about it, that's really the mindset you have: you want something but your kids are keeping you from getting it.
What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you?
— James 4:1
For example:
You want sleep. When your little one gets up in the middle of the night refusing to go back to sleep, this fire of anger consumes you like a wildfire... or, You want to host a beautiful gathering at your home. But your little one spills Kool-aid all over the floor MINUTES before your guests arrive, and so you bark at your kids and grumpily wipe up the mess... or, You want to be on time for church but your little one JUST. WON'T. GET. INTO. their car seat, and so you yell and you threat.
These things that you want are probably good things. I'm not saying it's bad to want sleep (I love sleep, in case anyone is wondering. Plus, we all need sleep.), but the question is more on the heart level: "is your desire for ______ causing you to sin against your children?"
I encourage you to take a minute and recall the last time you yelled at your kids, what did you want at the moment? What were the underlying motives for your annoyance/irritation? Did you want to control the outcome of doing certain things? Did you want to appear put together?
Ask God to search your heart, mama. Confess and repent; and ask your children for forgiveness.
Your Kids' Disobedience is Not a Personal Offense to You
This is something I learned this year. Often times, when I lash out in anger or when I discipline out of anger, it's because I look at my kids' disobedience like a personal attack.
I look at it like it's them vs. me. I look at it like they are against me.
This can be confusing because they are disobeying me. However, their disobedience ultimately is not against me. Their disobedience is ultimately against God. You as a mom is the tool that God uses to minister to your kids' hearts. When your kids disobey or disrespect, it's because they have an authority issue with God. It's not you.
So now, when my kids disobey or disrespect, I need to keep that in mind otherwise I will be consumed by my anger and I will discipline out of anger. They are not intentionally plotting out schemes to make me angry. They are sinners at heart and they are opposed to God's authority.
When we shift our focus from self to God, we will see that parenting is not about us. It is not about us looking good with well-behaved, well-rounded children. It is about being an instrument in God's hand to shepherd our children's hearts.
There are plenty of moments when you don't feel like reinforcing discipline yet again. There are plenty of moments when you look at your kids and you just want to scream.
Don't let your feelings trick you.
Those moments are moments of God's grace showing you your children's hearts need to be tuned up so that they will be guided by The Lamp.
In Paul Tripp's words, "It's never a hassle, it's never an interruption, it's always grace."
God loves your children so much, He wants to use you to lead them back on the right track.
I believe that when we look at parenting with a God-focused lens, when our children are disobedient, we will less likely lash out in anger but use this moment of grace to guide our children back on the way they should go.
I want to encourage you to make a choice today:
Will you shift your focus from self to God and become an instrument to tune your children's hearts to God?
Have you enjoyed this episode? Subscribe today so you don't miss out on future encouragement + practical wisdom! Subscribe on iTunes, Google Play or Stitcher.
Podcast music: Sunny Holidays & Summertime by Nicolai Heidlas
#023: Cultivating an Intentional Bookshelf for Your Children with Samantha Munoz
Nov 06, 2017
Show notes
Thank you for tuning in for another episode of the Indwelt Women Podcast.
Join Samantha Munoz (of Addison Reads) and I as we talked about how to create a home library for your children that will help you teach the values important to your family.
On this episode, we chatted about:
Why is it important to be selective with the books your kids read.
What is an Intentional Bookshelf?
How do you create an Intentional Bookshelf?
How to handle terrible book gifts.
What to do when your child is reading a bad book.
How to ease the overwhelm of choosing the right books for your children with the Intentional Book Club.
The Intentional Book Club is officially open!! Yay!! Seriously, you have to sign up for it.
It is such a great resource for you to cultivate an intentional bookshelf for your children so that it helps you feed biblical truths to your children.
**Full closure: this is an affiliate link. I only become an affiliate because I believe in it so much!
Have you enjoyed this episode? Subscribe today so you don't miss out on future encouragement + practical wisdom! Subscribe on iTunes, Google Play or Stitcher.
Podcast music: Sunny Holidays & Summertime by Nicolai Heidlas
#022: How to Be Jesus' Hands + Feet This Christmas: Ideas to Bless Others and Be Christ's Ambassadors
Nov 02, 2017
Show notes
Christmas is one of my favorite seasons of the year.
But if I'm being honest, it's so easy to completely miss the point. In the midst of all the pies, presents and endless hours of Christmas movies, where is Jesus in our celebration?!
Jesus is the reason for the season; He is the reason we get to celebrate the gift of eternal life.
So how about we do something different this year?! How about we commit to not pushing Jesus to the back burner this Christmas? How about we shine a spotlight on Him and spread His hope, love, and joy to all those around us?!
A few ideas on becoming His Hands + Feet this Christmas:
BE VISIBLE.
Don't hide behind closed doors. Open your home and invite people in! Your home doesn't have to be perfect to invite people in. In fact, it will only make people uncomfortable if it's "perfect" because they're too busy thinking they'll ruin something in your home! Christ-centered hospitality is all about opening your heart to others. It's about accepting one another just as you are.
So, be visible and open your home:
Invite the kids on your block over to make Christmas cookies together! I'm sure their parents would love to give their children something to do because... winter = cabin fever.
Invite people over to assemble Operation Christmas Child boxes together! Fill shoe boxes full of toys and they will be sent to over 100 countries around the world. These boxes will bless many children and are used as a tool to share the Gospel. Find out more about Operation Christmas Child here.
Invite people over for a Christmas-related craft project! My friend Kate over at Craft A Community wants to help you build real + authentic community in your own town. Get a few ladies over, make some crafts together and start building life-giving friendships! If you're not crafty, no worries, Kate takes care of all the prep work for you! She gives you the supplies list and step-by-step tutorials for simple but fantastic craft projects. You just have to gather the ladies! That's it! It's a wonderful way to finally get to know the neighbors you always see but have yet to start a real conversation with.
Make a meal for the Ronald McDonald House in your area. A few years ago, my community group did it together as a service project and it was wonderful! What a blessing it was to be able to provide the families with a hot and hearty soup for the winter!
Serve at Your Local Shelter. Keep in mind it's more than just about giving them socks or warm coats. It's about spending time with the people who are at the shelter because a lot of times they are looked down upon, they feel disrespected. What a blessing it would be to just spend time with them, even just playing a board game. What a great way for them to feel loved and acknowledged!
Host a Christmas movie marathon. Invite families over for a Christmas movie or two. The kids can watch movies with popcorn while the adults chat! It's a great way to connect with each other or maybe even meet new people!
Invite others into your home for the Christmas meal. What a blessing it will be to invite widows over or people who don't have families around for the Christmas meal. You'll probably have leftovers anyway, right? ;)
A HEART, SOUL + MIND IN SYNC WITH JESUS.
Honestly, we can do all the things in the name of Jesus, but if our hearts, souls, and minds are not transformed by the Word first, all that we do will end up feeling empty.
Start by getting in the Word one verse at a time. You don't have to have an hour to read in order to have a meaningful quiet time. It can be as little as 10 minutes. As you read, ask yourself these questions to help you dig deep:
What is this text really trying to say?
What does this teach me about God?
What does this teach me about Jesus?
What does this teach me about myself?
How does this relate to the Gospel?
How can I live out the truth today in light of what I've read?
When you slow down and read one verse at a time, it really allows you to dwell in the verse. That's what Indwelt Women is all about - we wanna help you dwell in the Word and be transformed in every area of your life!
If you are looking for a study guide that will help you dwell in the Word, give our Bible studies a try! Until this Friday at 11:59pm CST, you can preorder the Advent study as well as the studies on James, Titus, and Proverbs 31.
Let these studies reorient your heart with Jesus so that all that you do is fueled by His Word. (Not to mention there are sweet perks for preorders like free shipping, free gift and extra discount!!) Get your preorders in before the bonus perks expire here.
I'm praying that all of us Indwelt Women will become Jesus' hands + feet this Christmas and will touch many hearts, especially those who don't know the Lord.
Have you enjoyed this episode? Subscribe today so you don't miss out on future encouragement + practical wisdom! Subscribe on iTunes, Google Play or Stitcher.
Podcast music: Sunny Holidays & Summertime by Nicolai Heidlas
#021: Connecting Creativity and Faith with Shanna Noel: Giving God Glory Through The Creative Gifts He Has Given You
Oct 30, 2017
Show notes
Join me for another episode on The Indwelt Women Podcast where Shanna Noel of Illustrated Faith and I talked about how to use the creative gifts God has given us for His Glory.
We talked about:
How connecting with God can look differently for everyone because God made us each uniquely;
How creative Bible journaling has changed Shanna's faith, marriage and motherhood for good;
How it's really about connecting with the God of creation, not about making a fabulous piece of art.
Have you enjoyed this episode? Subscribe today so you don't miss out on future encouragement + practical wisdom! Subscribe on iTunes, Google Play or Stitcher.
Podcast music: Sunny Holidays & Summertime by Nicolai Heidlas
#020: How to Handle Hurt and Disappointment in Relationships
Oct 26, 2017
Show notes
In a broken world, we will inevitably experience hurt and disappointment in our own relationships with our spouses, friends and family members. As Christ followers, what makes us different is how we handle it when it happens.
Guard your mouth.
A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
— Proverbs 15:1
Hurtful and resentful words often fly out of our mouths when our feelings are hurt. They are words that aren't helpful to the situation and will only tear the relationship apart a little further; they are words we probably will regret later on. Don't hear me say that your hurt is not legitimate. Yes, it is. At the same time, we are called to be responsible for our responses. In the same way, the person who hurt you is responsible for his/her actions and speech. If we can't find anything to say that's kind and gracious, it will be wise to control our tongue.
Go to God first.
Retreat into a quiet space where you can lay down all your thoughts and emotions at Jesus's feet. He already knows how you feel. But it's the surrender of those thoughts and feelings that empties your heart of hurt, resentment, anger, and bitterness. Only when your heart is empty of unfruitful thoughts can you fill it back up with the fruits of the Spirit. Go to God in prayer and ask Him to help you reconcile the relationship in the most God-glorifying way.
Search your heart
While you're laying down your hurt at God's feet, ask Him to search your heart. Ask Him, "Do I have sin in my own heart? Did I sin in any way that contributed to this? Is there anything that I need to seek forgiveness for?" Sometimes we might be so clouded by our emotions that we don't see the situation clearly. Asking God who knows your heart through and through will help you see everything in a better light.
Let the lamp guide your feet
Knowing how to handle hurt and disappointment comes from God's Word. So what does the Scripture say about grace and forgiveness?
Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.
— Matthew 18:21-22
For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
— Matthew 6:14-15
God didn't call us to only forgive a few times; He asks us to forgive time and time again. Moreover, we are called to extend to others the forgiveness He has so freely given us. How often have you sinned against God? How often has He forgiven you? Just as God forgives you, you ought to forgive others as well.
Converse with the other party
When you are ready to approach the person in a calm manner, talk through the situation using the conflict wheel. It has helped me in my own conflict resolution. Here's how it works: with the conflict wheel, it gives you and the other party a chance to talk through...
1) What had happened 2) How it made you think 3) How it made you feel 4) What did you want 5) What do you want moving forward
This conflict wheel is very helpful as it guides you through the conversation in a clear and logical manner.
Pray before your meeting.
Before approaching the other party, ask God to prepare the hearts of those involved. Ask Him for a fruitful conversation as He guides your lips. The times that I did pray before I approached someone, our conversations always went better than if I didn't.
Confess any sins on your part and ask for forgiveness.
If God has revealed to you any sins on your part, be faithful and humble in asking for forgiveness from the other party.
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom.
— Proverbs 11:2
It is not easy to ask for forgiveness when you've been hurt. It stings our pride. However, pride has no place in the hearts of us Christ followers.
I want to encourage you to take upon Christ's humility to ask for forgiveness. Think about how great of a testimony it will be - especially to those who don't believe in Christ, because this isn't something people do very often. What a testimony of humility and grace and forgiveness it will be!
It is not easy handling hurt and disappointment. But if we seek to glorify God in the process, we know we can stand before God and say, "I have done everything I can in ways that I know are the most glorifying to You." That's what's most important to us as we seek to live out God's Word.
For the Christmas gift guide for Christians, go here.
Have you enjoyed this episode? Subscribe today so you don't miss out on future encouragement + practical wisdom! Subscribe on iTunes, Google Play or Stitcher.
Podcast music: Sunny Holidays & Summertime by Nicolai Heidlas
#019: For the Mom Who Hasn't Sat Through a Sermon Without Distractions
Oct 23, 2017
Show notes
Full Disclosure: Some of the links on this site may be affiliated which means I earn a commission at no cost to you should you make a purchase via the link. All opinions are 100% my own.
"What's the point of going to church?", I thought as I packed up the diaper bag to go to church.
At the time, my oldest was just over 2 and it felt like it'd been 2 years since I'd really sat through a sermon without any distractions.
Going to church to me just meant that I was taking care of my babies at a church. Many weeks I left church thinking, "I had no idea what the sermon was about."
When going to church was so unfruitful, why even go through the hassle of packing everything up and getting everyone in the van?
Why You Should Keep Going to Church
Going to church is not just about listening to a sermon. If that's the sole purpose, one could argue he could do the same at home listening to a sermon on a podcast. The "church" you go to is really just a building. What makes it a church is you and your brothers and sisters in Christ; it's the body of Christ that makes it a church. When you attend a church service, you are reuniting as one body. You are reconnecting with other members within the church body. It gives you opportunities to bond and uplift one another. That is something you don't get when you're just watching John Piper preach on YouTube.
Your kids need to see you put God first. If God is as important as you say it is, your kids need to see you live it out. They need to see you pursue Him even when it's hard. By doing so, you will show them that sometimes in life seeking to know God is not always smooth sailing, but through perseverance, you can rise up above the obstacles.
How to Minimize Distractions
Entrust Your Kids to Sunday School Teachers - I should've sent my oldest to the nursery early on, but it was so hard for me to leave them there when I knew he'd make a scene. Z had (and still does sometimes but he's come a long way) separation anxiety. He'd cry and cry and cry if I left him at the nursery. But for the sake of your spiritual well-being, mama, you just gotta do it. Don't feel bad about making it hard on the Sunday school teachers. Even as a single lady before I got married, I understood that kids just needed to get used to being by themselves. You're not burdening the teachers by leaving your crying kiddos to them. Over time, your kids will be okay spending time away from you.
Bring Snacks & Toys - If the kiddos have to stay with you during the sermon, bring lots of distractions for them. Finger snacks like the Gerber puffs or little crunchies help keep them busy. I also like quiet toys like this wooden puzzle fidget - I like that it fosters creativity. If your kids are older and can work on activity cards by themselves, I suggest these Usborne wipe clean activity cards. They spark creativity and problem-solving skills through games, puzzles, and quizzes.
I want to encourage you that this is just a season. You will be able to sit through a sermon and learn from the teaching. Persevere, mama friend. If you can, send your kids to the nursery so you can be fed spiritually. When you are poured into, you can then pour out to your family well.
Have you enjoyed this episode? Subscribe today so you don't miss out on future encouragement + practical wisdom! Subscribe on iTunes, Google Play or Stitcher.
Podcast music: Sunny Holidays & Summertime by Nicolai Heidlas
#018: Why Biblical Counseling is For You and Me: Busting Out the Myths with Aimee Marino
Oct 19, 2017
Show notes
Welcome back to another episode of The Indwelt Women Podcast.
I have my real-life dear friend Aimee come on and talk about all things biblical counseling related. We are going to talk about:
What is biblical counseling;
Why is biblical counseling important;
The difference between biblical counseling and secular psychology/therapy;
Who could benefit from biblical counseling;
Who could give biblical counseling;
How you can find biblical counselors near you;
How you can get training to do biblical counseling formally.
This episode is jam-packed. You won't wanna miss it!
Have you enjoyed this episode? Subscribe today so you don't miss out on future encouragement + practical wisdom! Subscribe on iTunes, Google Play or Stitcher.
Podcast music: Sunny Holidays & Summertime by Nicolai Heidlas
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