The Hey, Girlfriend Podcast

Latest Episodes:

124. Make Him Step Up Without Begging, Chasing, or Explaining Apr 23, 2026

Show notes

If you’ve ever felt like you had to beg a man to show up, explain your needs over and over, or chase consistency… this is the truth most people won’t say out loud.

Men don’t step up because of what you say.

They step up because of what your presence requires.

In this episode, we’re talking about why over-explaining, overgiving, and overextending actually keeps you stuck in the cycle of inconsistency—and what to do instead.

This isn’t about playing games or manipulating him.

It’s about shifting out of survival mode in love and into self-respect.

You’ll learn:

• Why begging for effort lowers your standard instead of raising it

• The difference between potential and pattern (and why it matters)

• How to stop overgiving access to someone who isn’t showing up

• What actually makes a man step up (and why some never will)

• How to let his behavior speak so you can see clearly

At some point, it stops being about “how do I make him act right?”

…and becomes “why am I staying where I’m not being met?”

You don’t make the right man step up.

You become someone who no longer entertains a man who won’t.

✨ Let’s connect:

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Authors page: https://www.amazon.com/author/kindalld

💜MY SOCIALS:

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?si=ztPs0PVePJP-q6Vr

Instagram: (155K followers)

https://www.instagram.com/ivebeenthatgirltoo/

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123. You Don’t Want Love—You Want to Be Chosen Apr 16, 2026

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You didn’t just want love…

you wanted to be chosen.

And without realizing it, that need can turn into something deeper—an identity.

In this video, we’re talking about what happens when your sense of self becomes tied to who chooses you… and why rejection feels so personal, why you stay longer than you should, and why it’s so hard to let go—even when you know something isn’t right.

Because this isn’t just about relationships.

It’s about the meaning you’ve attached to being picked.

At some point, you stop asking “Do I even want this?”

and start asking “Why don’t they want me?”

And that shift changes everything.

This video will help you understand:

• Why being chosen feels so important to you

• How this pattern shows up in dating and relationships

• Why you lose yourself trying to be chosen

• And how to rebuild your identity without needing validation from someone else

If you’ve ever felt like your worth increased when someone chose you… or decreased when they didn’t, this is for you.

✨ Let’s connect:

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💜books, coaching and more:

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Authors page: https://www.amazon.com/author/kindalld

💜MY SOCIALS:

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?si=ztPs0PVePJP-q6Vr

I’ve Been That Girl, too Instagram: (151K followers)

https://www.instagram.com/ivebeenthatgirltoo/

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122. He’s Not Your Person, He’s a Pattern Apr 02, 2026

Show notes

You keep telling yourself it’s love.

That if you just give it more time, more patience, more understanding… it will finally feel the way it’s supposed to.

But what if the reason you’re still there isn’t love?

What if it’s familiarity?

In this video, I’m breaking down the truth behind staying in relationships that drain you—and why it can feel so hard to leave even when you know something isn’t right. This isn’t about blaming yourself. It’s about understanding the patterns we learn, how they show up in our relationships, and how they keep us attached to people who aren’t able to meet us fully.

You’re not confused.

You’re used to it.

And once you see it clearly, you’ll understand why choosing differently feels so uncomfortable—and why it’s necessary.

✨ Let’s connect:

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💜books, coaching and more:

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Authors page: https://www.amazon.com/author/kindalld

💜MY SOCIALS:

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?si=ztPs0PVePJP-q6Vr

I’ve Been That Girl, too Instagram: (151K followers)

https://www.instagram.com/ivebeenthatgirltoo/

TikTok: (42.7K Followers) https://www.tiktok.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?_t=8s8vdJSMVZv&_r=1

Threads: (35K followers) https://www.threads.net/@ivebeenthatgirltoo?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

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121. This is How You Know He’s Not Playing About You | Men with Good Intentions Will Do These Things Mar 12, 2026

Show notes

How do you know if a guy actually has good intentions — before you’re already attached? In this video, I’m breaking down 8 subtle but powerful signs that reveal a man’s true character early in dating. These aren’t the obvious things. These are the quiet, easy-to-miss behaviors that separate the men who are serious from the ones who are just skilled at seeming like it.

If you’re tired of second-guessing and want to learn how to read what’s actually in front of you — this one’s for you.

⬇️ Watch until the end — sign #5 is the one most women overlook.

📌 Save this video to come back to when you need a reminder.

✨ Let’s connect:

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💜books, coaching and more:

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Authors page: https://www.amazon.com/author/kindalld

💜MY SOCIALS:

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?si=ztPs0PVePJP-q6Vr

I’ve Been That Girl, too Instagram: (151K followers)

https://www.instagram.com/ivebeenthatgirltoo/

TikTok: (42.7K Followers) https://www.tiktok.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?_t=8s8vdJSMVZv&_r=1

Threads: (35K followers) https://www.threads.net/@ivebeenthatgirltoo?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

Business Inquiries:

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120. You Say You Want an Emotionally Available Man… Do You Understand What You’re Asking For? Mar 05, 2026

Show notes

Many women say they want an emotionally available man. But what happens when you finally meet one?

In this video, I talk about something that doesn’t get discussed enough: how toxic or emotionally unavailable relationships can condition you to respond to healthy love in unhealthy ways.

I share my personal experience of learning how to communicate, unlearn survival tactics, and grow inside a relationship with a genuinely good man. Because sometimes the hardest part of healthy love isn’t finding it — it’s learning how to receive it.

In this video we talk about:

• Why healthy men can feel unfamiliar after toxic relationships

• The survival tactics women develop in emotionally unsafe relationships

• Passive aggression, testing, and threatening to leave

• How emotionally healthy men respond differently

• What it looks like to heal inside a relationship

• How to recognize when you’re growing instead of sabotaging

You don’t have to be fully healed to deserve healthy love.

But you do have to be willing to grow once you’re in it.

✨ Let’s connect:

💜1:1 coaching &

BONUS podcast episodes

https://www.patreon.com/Ivebeenthatgirl

💜books, coaching and more:

https://linktr.ee/ivebeenthatgirl.net

Authors page: https://www.amazon.com/author/kindalld

💜MY SOCIALS:

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?si=ztPs0PVePJP-q6Vr

I’ve Been That Girl, too Instagram: (151K followers)

https://www.instagram.com/ivebeenthatgirltoo/

TikTok: (42.7K Followers) https://www.tiktok.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?_t=8s8vdJSMVZv&_r=1

Threads: (35K followers) https://www.threads.net/@ivebeenthatgirltoo?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

Business Inquiries:

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119. Make Him Realize He Fumbled You Feb 19, 2026

Show notes

He knew your worth.

He just didn’t think you’d leave.

In this episode, we’re talking about why men take good women for granted — and what actually makes a man realize he fumbled you. Spoiler: it’s not begging, over-explaining, or proving your value.

✨ Let’s connect:

💜1:1 coaching &

BONUS podcast episodes

https://www.patreon.com/Ivebeenthatgirl

💜books, coaching and more:

https://linktr.ee/ivebeenthatgirl.net

Authors page: https://www.amazon.com/author/kindalld

💜MY SOCIALS:

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?si=ztPs0PVePJP-q6Vr

I’ve Been That Girl, too Instagram: (151K followers)

https://www.instagram.com/ivebeenthatgirltoo/

TikTok: (42.7K Followers) https://www.tiktok.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?_t=8s8vdJSMVZv&_r=1

Threads: (35K followers) https://www.threads.net/@ivebeenthatgirltoo?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

Business Inquiries:

https://linktr.ee/ivebeenthatgirl.net

(Click the envelope icon at the top of the site)

If you’ve ever felt like he didn’t see how good you were… this conversation is going to shift your perspective.

We break down:

• Why men recognize your value but still mishandle you

• The connection between low self-worth and taking a woman for granted

• How over-availability quietly removes urgency

• Why speaking up and upholding boundaries changes everything

• How to make him feel the loss without revenge or games

• The power of having a life outside of him

• Why access — not your worth — is the real issue

This isn’t about “making him act right.”

It’s about not betraying yourself.

It’s about understanding that sometimes the only way a man learns your value… is when he no longer has access to you.

If you’re in the process of detaching, setting standards, or walking away from someone who underestimated you — this episode is for you.

118. He Wasn’t Special…He Was Just Fine (And He Wanted You) Feb 12, 2026

Show notes

He wasn’t even that special… he was just fine. And he wanted you.

In this video, we’re talking about why we fall for emotionally unavailable men, why love bombing works on self-aware women, and the truth about validation, attention, and our inner teen.

Sometimes it’s not a soul tie.

Sometimes it’s not destiny.

Sometimes it’s just the first time a man we actually find attractive chooses us — and we build it into something it never was.

We’re unpacking:

• Love bombing and why it feels so intense

• The difference between chemistry and validation

• Why emotionally unavailable men feel exciting

• The “inner teen” no one talks about

• How to stop confusing being chosen with being valued

If you’ve ever chased a man who was “fine” but inconsistent… this one is for you.

You’re not crazy. You’re not weak.

You just finally felt chosen.

Healing Sundays ONLY on my YouTube channel can be found here:

https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwGugZ7M2WXmeERAHpePYJzNimNl_3ZLH&si=0D3RBNDvIyA1rBbs

✨ Let’s connect:

💜1:1 coaching &

BONUS podcast episodes

https://www.patreon.com/Ivebeenthatgirl

💜books, coaching and more:

https://linktr.ee/ivebeenthatgirl.net

Authors page: https://www.amazon.com/author/kindalld

💜MY SOCIALS:

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?si=ztPs0PVePJP-q6Vr

I’ve Been That Girl, too Instagram: (151K followers)

https://www.instagram.com/ivebeenthatgirltoo/

TikTok: (42.7K Followers) https://www.tiktok.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?_t=8s8vdJSMVZv&_r=1

Threads: (35K followers) https://www.threads.net/@ivebeenthatgirltoo?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

Business Inquiries:

https://linktr.ee/ivebeenthatgirl.net

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117. Make Him Feel Stupid for Trying You (The Reverse Uno Method) Feb 05, 2026

Show notes

You gotta make him feel stupid for trying you—and the way you do that isn’t revenge, yelling, or explaining. It’s walking away for good.

In this video, we talk about why continuing to engage with a man who already showed you who he is only feeds his ego—and leaves you feeling drained, embarrassed, and stuck. If you’ve ever found yourself missing him, wanting to text him, or struggling not to fold even though you know it’s over, this conversation is for you.

I break down:

• Why men expect you to come back

• How continuing to engage gives him power over you

• The psychology behind silence and emotional discipline

• Why walking away hurts his ego more than chasing ever will

• How to stop reaching out, even when it hurts

• What actually happens when you leave him alone and level up

This isn’t about playing games.

It’s about self-respect.

It’s about discipline over desire.

And it’s about choosing yourself—even when it’s uncomfortable.

If you’re ready to stop stroking his ego, stop betraying yourself, and finally move on with your life, this video will help you shift your mindset and take your power back.

💬 Let me know in the comments—what was the hardest part about leaving him alone?

💜1:1 coaching &

BONUS podcast episodes

https://www.patreon.com/Ivebeenthatgirl

💜books, coaching and more:

https://linktr.ee/ivebeenthatgirl.net

Authors page: https://www.amazon.com/author/kindalld

💜MY SOCIALS:

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?si=ztPs0PVePJP-q6Vr

I’ve Been That Girl, too Instagram: (151K followers)

https://www.instagram.com/ivebeenthatgirltoo/

TikTok: (42.7K Followers) https://www.tiktok.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?_t=8s8vdJSMVZv&_r=1

Threads: (35K followers) https://www.threads.net/@ivebeenthatgirltoo?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

Business Inquiries:

https://linktr.ee/ivebeenthatgirl.net

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116. You’re Not Clingy (He Needs a Healthy Obsession With You or You Will Feel Clingy) Jan 29, 2026

Show notes

If a man doesn’t have a healthy obsession with you, the relationship will slowly make you anxious, insecure, and self-doubting.

Women are constantly told they’re “clingy,” “too emotional,” or “asking for too much”—when in reality, they’re responding to emotional inconsistency and lack of presence.

In this video, I break down:

• What “healthy obsession” actually means (and what it doesn’t)

• Why women feel anxious in emotionally unavailable relationships

• Why some men push back hard against emotional closeness

• The difference between control and emotional investment

• Why the right man makes you feel settled—not confused

This isn’t about toxicity.

It’s about emotional responsibility.

If you’ve ever felt like you had to shrink, stay quiet, or lower your expectations to keep a man—this conversation is for you.

✨ Share this with a woman who’s been told she’s “too much.”

✨ Subscribe for honest conversations about love, attachment, and emotional safety.

✨ Let’s connect:

💜1:1 coaching &

BONUS podcast episodes

https://www.patreon.com/Ivebeenthatgirl

💜books, coaching and more:

https://linktr.ee/ivebeenthatgirl.net

Authors page: https://www.amazon.com/author/kindalld

💜MY SOCIALS:

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?si=ztPs0PVePJP-q6Vr

I’ve Been That Girl, too Instagram: (151K followers)

https://www.instagram.com/ivebeenthatgirltoo/

TikTok: (42.7K Followers) https://www.tiktok.com/@ivebeenthatgirl?_t=8s8vdJSMVZv&_r=1

Threads: (35K followers) https://www.threads.net/@ivebeenthatgirltoo?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

Business Inquiries:

https://linktr.ee/ivebeenthatgirl.net

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115. Why Some Men Will Never Get Married—No Matter How Good The Woman Is Jan 22, 2026

Show notes

Why do some men say they want marriage—but never seem able to sustain it?

In this video, I talk about why liking your partner matters more than people admit, and why some men will never be marriage material—not because they don’t want love, but because they don’t truly appreciate women as people.

Inspired by a conversation about long-term marriage, this discussion breaks down unrealistic expectations placed on women, the idea that a woman should “be his peace,” and why conflict, inconvenience, and tension are not signs of a failing relationship—but part of real intimacy.

As a married woman, I share what I’ve learned about staying power, emotional maturity, and why love alone isn’t enough to sustain a marriage. If you’ve ever questioned why a man avoids commitment, resents boundaries, or shuts down when relationships require growth—this conversation is for you.

This video is for women who want clarity, not confusion—and for anyone trying to understand what actually makes a relationship last.

Read the thread:

The thread:

https://www.threads.com/@ivebeenthatgirltoo/post/DTv0dx7EcTL?xmt=AQF0dirXWeKzynFER01acwx_hmXcU1I5Yx9ZMuXJHktBt0oyJ2LZA7pO4mjqoVblsUuamBQ&slof=1

✨ Let’s connect:

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💜books, coaching and more:

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Authors page: https://www.amazon.com/author/kindalld

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