A group of friends who work in the games industry meet up once a week to talk about PC games over a drink. “Off-the-cuff” is a polite way to say “unprofessional”, right?
Episode 361: Good Killing Slippers
Mar 13, 2021
Show notes
Tom S, Graham and Marsh put on their luckiest killing slippers and put the shoe into JRPGs Dragon Quest XI and Bravely Default 2. Plus, recursive first-person puzzler Maquette, the valblue of subs, and a sorry end in the football cul-de-sac.
First person puzzler where things are big and small and you are in them and outside of them: Maquette.
First person puzzler where things can big and small depending on your perspective and it turns out there’s nothing terribly interesting about this: Superliminal
First person puzzler where the world repeats infinitely and this is continuously wondrous: Manifold Garden
Episode 360: The Omelette Of Games
Mar 06, 2021
Show notes
Alex, Tom F, Chris and Marsh colonise the skies in Airborne Kingdom, recolonise the lands of Loop Hero, overheat colonists in Terraforming Mars and perforate colons in brutal duelling sim Hellish Quart. Also the soviet miserablism of HROT. Kiss kiss!
Doomed libertarian expedition, Artifact, has finally eaten the last of its own shoes and will now go lie down in the snow forever.
Space wizard dress-up asset grind, Destiny 2, has had one of its modes nuked because of ingenious match-fixing.
Chess game with only two choices per move: Lazy Chess.
Episode 359: The Least Nourishing Bant
Feb 26, 2021
Show notes
Alex, Tom S and Graham push right in the wordless storyworld of Voyage, bash chitin in the bullet hell of Mushihimesama and gush over affectionate genre-hopping satire Lair of the Clockwork God.
If you feel you’ve been harmed by the discussion of pizza in this podcast, please contact our Culinary Crime Office on 1800-DONT-AT-ME.
Episode 358: A Messy Appendage That Can’t Ever Satisfy Itself
Feb 19, 2021
Show notes
Both Toms, Graham and Marsh defy death in timeloop horror House, deal death in globetrotting trilogy Hitman, dodge death in smart shmup Bezier and become death in Death Crown. Also: streamlined space strat Slipways and the joy of City Guesser.
Episode 357: A Trite, Shapeless Opinion Of Indeterminate Size
Feb 12, 2021
Show notes
Chris, Alex and Marsh boot up modern games made for ye olde machines (Micro Mages, Nox Archaist and Tanglewood), put the boot into baddies in Shady Knight, woodchip birdies in Journey to the Savage Planet and chop wood in Nordic survival hit Valheim.
Marty O’Donnell primes his Plangent Hero Horn for the return of Six Days in Fallujah.
Episode 356: Maggots, Leggings, Wizards… Diablo!
Feb 05, 2021
Show notes
Graham, Tom S, Alex and Chris numb themselves with Hexceed and Dungeon & Puzzles; inexplicably return to Syberia; defy the predictions of Gods Will Fall; hop, skip and jump through Olija; and holiday in Hitman III.
Visit the C&C Community’s 2020 Game of the Year hot take repository. Many thanks to Kane, as always, for this amazing thing, and the community at large for being just deeply lovely.
Episode 355: Climb Up A Wookie And Sync
Jan 22, 2021
Show notes
Tom S, Chris and Marsh sink into the obliviating waters of Hades and World of Warcraft, gun gribblies in Soulsian sleeper hit Remnant: From the Ashes, blindly steer a nation in Suzerain and snap critters in Penko Park’s kooky safari.
Episode 354: All That Goddamn Scooching
Jan 15, 2021
Show notes
Toms F and S are joined by Alex to discuss Monster Train’s forthcoming factions, go full dork over emulation widget MiSTer and be disappointed by England – in Assassin’s Creed Valhalla, too! Ha! Ha! Ha!
Cyberpunk 2077’s developers have conceded the existence of linear time, but not much else, in their roadmap.
A C&C Chat with Christian Donlan: Ram Yourself Into an Emu Until It Kills You
Jan 12, 2021
Show notes
Bonus episode! Tom chats to top games critic and lovely person Christian Donlan in a meandering discussion about Star Trek, old Mario games, classic sci-fi films, Rogue, and much more. And then Christian’s cat makes an appearance, which just makes everything even better.
The main C&C pod shall resume service shortly! Also another film ‘n telly pod with Jamie Brittain is in the works. Also I, Tom, having dropped the third-person pretence only moments into writing this intro, will politely nag Christian to do another one of these when he has time. Hope you all enjoy!
Show notes!
Tom has been playing a lot of Mario Galaxy, Sunshine, and Mario 64 on Switch. Which one is the best though?
We got into a lot of fun tangents early. Films mentioned: 2001 A Space Odyssey, Rush, Blade Runner, Nice Guys, Les Mis.
Remember cinemas? BFI constantly sponsor reruns of classic films in the UK – worth a follow.
Rogue is on Steam, kind of, purists might want to hunt for the unchanged original version.
Christian revisited Rogue in 2020 and wrote this great piece about it. I love articles that make me immediately want to download a game and chase the same experience.
ToeJam and Earl is just Rogue – discuss.
Special shout-out to Christian’s cat, making a sadly brief audio cameo.
Christian intelligently references Orson Wells’ Moby Dick stage show.
BUT THEN Tom gets carried away and tangentially references Wells’ War of the Worlds radio show because he listened to it recently and got excited.
Modern Rogue descendants (there are so, so many more) – Spelunky, Hades, and Below (not so good).
The title of the next Stereophonics album: “Just Enough Suffering to Make it Worthwhile”
Diablo: “Hitting skeletons and getting loot”. The perfect five-word elevator pitch.
Tom dives into the wankthought hole(tm} with reflections on the psychology of dungeons, or at least the gloom and delight of descending to terrible depths and emerging into sunlight as an effective device.
The Silent Cartographer – Halo, Blighttown, Half-Life Alyx, and so many more games do this, and it’s great.
The Crate and Crowbar is kindly funded by our Patreon backers. If you’d like to know more about supporting our podcast and its spinoffs, click here.
The Crate and Crowbar Film and TV Pod 002: The Evil Influence of Disco Dancers
Dec 23, 2020
Show notes
Tom and Jamie gathered many weeks ago to record a whole new meandering chat through our film and TV obsessions of the moment! With Christmas just around the corner, Tom has finally found the time to publish this one as a hopefully fun bonus episode for the holiday season. 2020 is ending; hooray! We hope you all get to enjoy some quality films and telly with a beverage of your choice over the break.
Many thanks to Jamie for the following in-depth show notes. You can find the pod on the Crate and Crowbar podcast feed, or a downloadable version right here.
What We’ve Been Watching
2:20
– Elena of Avalor (Disney
Plus)
Since recording this, Jamie has realised that Elena Of Avalor actually does have a movie length special to kick it off which outlines the plot, which is ‘hidden’ behind a different tab on Disney Plus. And also, the show was just cancelled, RIP, it’s a really well made, well written show.
Frozen remains amazing. Frozen 2 is a bit of a mess (but the songs still slap).
The new one Ducktales has David Tennant as Uncle Scrooge. The old Ducktales still has an amazing theme song but feels a bit much. Here’s the Finnish language version with the lyrics interpreted in English. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PhSdSzSqLys
Hey Duggee is a kids show about a dog Scout Master that is also one of the funniest things on tv.
Adventure Time is a fantastic kids show for adults.
The very good Bojack Horseman (Netflix) gets a quick mention here, but it deserves further discussion.
Below Deck (Netflix) is a reality show set on a massive boat, which is Horny Blue Peter about poor quality ironing and beautiful idiots falling out.
Modern
reality TV, or, in a loaded and amusing phrase that Jamie has just in
this pod introduced me to – STRUCTURED REALITY: Below Deck, TOWIE,
Love Island, Geordie/Jersey Shore.
For the behind-the-scenes drama exploring the aspirational psychopathy of being a producer on one of these shows: UnREAL: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt3314218/
Othello is by William Shakespeare. There are several film versions, including versions by Kenneth Branaugh and Orson Wells. Jamie’s favourite is of course 2001’s ‘O’ starring Julia Stiles and Josh Hartnett.
Love At First Sight was a dark voyage into the bleakest passions of awful people.
The Incredible Hulk. S2 Episode: Alice in Disco Land. Jamie’s description and the title sells the episode more than I ever could here. Here is the disco version of the ending theme, for your health: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UDTqATFcvyc
Shows about lonely men arriving in a place to solve a self contained scenario and then leaves (still sad): The Lone Ranger. The Fugitive. Quantum Leap, Sliders. 14th-century Middle English chivalric romance Sir Gawain And The Green Knight.
The deep sadness of the 70s: The French Connection, Taxi Driver. Nasty endings are cathartic sometimes aren’t they? But perhaps not in 2020.
The lingering rot of the Vietnam war infected North American drama for years. If the monster that lives inside you doesn’t get you, the Military-industrial Complex will. The Rambo films chart US pop culture’s absurd path from introspection back to celebratory jingoism.
If you had to chart the many plotlines of Dark S1 on a graph it would end up being a massive, meaningless knot. Season 2 is sharper, more focused, and much better. Sadly, you have to slog through S1 to understand what the heck is going on. S3 is a well-made mess.
Formula 1 racing is an extraordinary spectacle. The cars are indeed very fast.
Darts, a spectacle on two levels – sport and pissup. Sid Waddell: “When Alexander of Macedonia was 33, he cried salt tears because there were no more worlds to conquer… Bristow’s only 27.”
Govan Ghost Story: Written by Jamie’s dad in 1989, he thinks it’s pretty great if he does say so himself, also features an excellent score by Scottish pop heroes The Blue Nile) AND Robert Carlyle’s uncredited first onscreen appearance as a distant, speechless, unmoving figure in the background of one shot:
Modern TV is often very safe, but I May Destroy You really, really isn’t. Better representation in tv is still a long way away, with anyone who isn’t a straight white man struggling to be heard.
Edge Of Darkness is an amazing voyage into grief and mystery. Please don’t watch the film.
Since we’re alone now, the show Jamie didn’t want to speak no more of was the atrocious Drama Life.
Bob Peck was also in Jurassic Park being eaten by intelligent female dinosaurs.
Thunderbirds/Joe 90/Stingray/Captain Scarlet
Spectacle, playground inspiration, freakish real hands.
Tom was Virgil, pilot of Thunderbird 2, specialising in demolition, heavy lifting and logistics, so that checks out.
Kyrano was the name of the the Tracy’s racistly portrayed Manservant, who The Hood was able to physically invade and find out International Recue’s Plans. It says a lot, not all of it good, about Jamie that he saw himself as him. But there was a lot going on in that show.
Team America and Borat are both very fucking funny, FYI. Borat 2 is out now and…well. Yeah.
GBH by Alan Bleasdale is an extraordinary show about authority,
politics, anxiety and fear. It doesn’t really fit into any easily
described genre, but describes a world that feels pretty similar to
the one we find ourselves in now. Michael Palin’s speech, could
have been written yesterday:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hX9llMV9qGc
Brazil is Terry Gilliam’s best film, fight Jamie.
1:18 Spoilers Ahoy!
I’m Thinking Of Ending Things
Charlie Kaufman has written some amazing scripts: Being John Malkovich, Adaptation, Eternal Sunshine.
I’m Thinking of Ending Things is based on a book of the same name written by Iain Reid. I think the film handles the subject matter more sensitively, even though the film is enormous and – for much of the second half – literally too dark to be able to quite see the actors’ performances.
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