Sex for Saints

Latest Episodes:

Episode 220 - The Fear of Pleasure Jul 08, 2022

Show notes

Do you fear pleasure? You might be saying 'no' but many of my clients do. Think about it. Do you take compliments well? Do you look at others who are pursuing their pleasure and think it's frivolous or inappropriate? It seems paradoxical because we spend so much of our life in the pursuit of happiness. Where does the fear of pleasure come from? For many of us, it comes from our childhood. Children are the epitome of pleasure! But then we're told to not be so loud, or not do that. And our brain begins to subconsciously equate pleasure with danger or even death. Listen to this week's episode to see what you can do about your fear of pleasure.

Source:

Getting the Love You Want by Harville Hendrix, Ph.D and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph.D.

Wikipedia - Hedonophobia

Episode 219 - Conscious Partnerships Jul 01, 2022

Show notes

When we get married, we often think that if we married the "right person," then everything will be easy. This is simply not true. Every relationship takes work. In this episode, we're talking about conscious partnerships. Let's go through the 10 attitudes/behaviors that characterize a conscious partnership. Any relationship worth having is worth working for!

Getting the Love You Want by Harville Hendrix, Ph.D and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph.D.

Episode 218 - The Importance of Being Selfish Jun 24, 2022

Show notes

Do you think that your own desires are selfish? Most of us women do. We've been taught this by well meaning people either explicitly or implicitly. While our desires are not more important than anyone else's, they are AS IMPORTANT as anyone else's, including our husband's, our children's, or anyone else in our lives. Listen to this episode to see how life changing it can be when we start to look at how being selfish sometimes is actually a good thing.

Episode 217 - Reclaiming Desire & Eros Jun 17, 2022

Show notes

Do you remember what it was like when you were dating your husband? Every touch was electric. You felt alive, maybe for the first time. That was eros energy. The life-giving energy. The erotic energy. But now, after a few years and a few kids, do you still feel that way? For most of my clients, the answer is no. They have given up too much of themselves to their marriage and children that they don't even know who they are anymore. Sound familiar? In this episode, let's talk about how you can regain that eros energy. That energy that makes you feel alive!

The State of Affairs by Esther Perel

Episode 216 - CFM: Why is Chastity Important in God's Plan? Jun 10, 2022

Show notes

There is a Come, Follow Me lesson coming up in the youth program about the Law of Chastity. I feel that we need to be careful when we're teaching our kids about sex to not use the fear or shame-based language that was used when we were taught about the Law of Chastity, because I see the results of that every day when I work with my clients. I know that we as parents and leaders are doing the best we can so I created a lesson plan for the youth leaders to know what to say and what to teach and how to say it in order to break that cycle of shame. I've also created a parent's guide to help you talk about this upcoming lesson beforehand. Sex is great! It's fun! And we want our kids to have that great sexual relationship when they're married. But we also want to give them the information they need to make an empowered choice.

To download the lesson plan and parent guide, go to: www.amandalouder.com/podcast/216/

Episode 215 - The Sexless Marriage Jun 03, 2022

Show notes

According to a survey, about 2% of marriages are completely sexless. Or, according to another study, couples are only having sex 10 times a year. Now, if 10 times a year is agreed upon by both parties, then that's great. But what happens when you don't agree on the frequency of sex? In this episode, we're going to take a look at 5 steps to create that intimacy in your marriage again. Passionate marriages take work but it is so worth it!

Sexless Marriage

State of Affairs by Esther Perel

What is a sexless marriage and are you in one?

5 Ways to start fixing your sexless marriage today

Episode 214 - What We Chase Will Run May 27, 2022

Show notes

My clients often say that they don't communicate well with their husbands, but actually, we as humans are really good at communicating. In fact, only about 7% of communication is verbal. We pick up on the non-verbal cues that our spouses are giving us, and sometimes we don't like what we "hear." So in this podcast, I'm talking to you pursuers out there. (I'm talking directly to the men today, but there are also women who do this too.) The pursuers are the ones who feel like when their wife says no, that just means try harder. You've already caught her since you're married. Are you actually causing her to run when you chase her?

Episode 213 - Disgusted by Bodily Fluids May 20, 2022

Show notes

Are you disgusted by the bodily fluids of your partner? Maybe you're disgusted by your own bodily fluids. If so, you are not alone. Many people feel this way. I used to. But did you know that it's a learned response? And if it's learned, that means it can be unlearned. In this podcast, we talk about why we feel bodily fluids are so disgusting and what we can do about that in our relationship. You won't be able to go from "bodily fluids are disgusting" to "anything that comes from the body is good" overnight, but it is possible.

Sources:

BBC News

Atlas of the Heart by Brené Brown

Pubmed

Episode 212 - Maintaining a Strong Sexual Connection May 13, 2022

Show notes

Has sex become boring for you? Do you not want to have sex? Maybe you're not having sex because there are so many other things that get in the way. So the question becomes, are you not having sex because you don't like it or do you not like the sex you're having? In this episode, we discuss how we can maintain that strong sexual connection throughout our marriage. Because life will get busy and you will be tired, but we'll talk about some ways you can get back that connection again and sustain it this time.

Resources:

Emily Nagoski TedTalk

Ondina Wellness

Episode 211 - Becoming a Peacemaker in Your Sex Life: An Interview with Jessica Farmer May 06, 2022

Show notes

In this episode, I'm talking with Jessica Farmer, a fellow life coach and friend, about how she went from being a peacekeeper to a peacemaker in her life and her marriage. She shared with us when she realized that what she had always been doing, what she thought she should be doing, was not letting her be completely herself. She was able to move from the peacekeeper that she had always been to a peacemaker that let her be who she was inside. Join us for this awesome discussion about how that change has improved everything in her life, including her sex life.

Find Jessica at:

jessicafarmercoaching.com/

@jessicafarmercoaching on Instagram

Podcast: When Marriage Gets Hard

Go to https://jessicafarmercoaching.com/free-video/ to receive free training on How To Stop Walking On Eggshells In Your Marriage

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