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    Christianity

    Sex Chat for Christian Wives

    Three Christian wives encourage other wives to enjoy God’s gift of sex in all of its awesomeness by presenting a biblical view, practical tips, and engaging discussion about godly sexual intimacy.

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    Copyright: © Copyright 2021 Sex Chat for Christian Wives

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    Latest Episodes:
    Our Holiday Gift Guide - Sexy and Romantic Gifts for Couples Nov 24, 2021
    Show notes About this episode

    We can't leave off the year without providing another wonderful gift guide! We'll link to others in the show notes, but today we're focusing on gifts that speak not only to marital intimacy but specifically our five senses.

    This idea made us think of the song "Twelve Days of Christmas"! Instead of five golden rings, we're addressing our five golden senses.

    Sponsor GET THE CARDS!

    Also sponsored by Share the Soap.

    And by Strong Wives.

    From the Bible

    What does the Bible say about gift-giving?

    Later on, during the wheat harvest, Samson took a young goat as a gift and visited his wife. – Judges 15:1 (Do not—I repeat, do NOT let your husband give you a goat for Christmas! Good heavens. ~ J)

    "They were to be days of feasting, rejoicing, and of sending gifts to one another and to the poor." – Esther 9:22b. (This verse refers to Purim, but shows the same generous spirit we want to have at Christmastime.)

    Resources

    Some of the links below are affiliates, meaning that the price remains the same for you, but we receive a small commission if you purchase through the link. These commissions help us to defer our costs. Thanks!

    Sight

    • Satin Blindfold
    • Standing/Floor Mirror
    • 100 Dates Scratch-off Poster
    • Magnetic (False) Eyelashes
    • Sheer Eyelash Robe

    Smell

    • Essential Oil Blends for Romance, Passion, or Sensuality
    • Ball Wash Charcoal Body Wash for Men
    • Gift Card for Bath and Body Works
    • Mist Your Mood Linen/Aromatherapy Spray

    Taste

    • Picnic Basket for Two
    • Hershey's Chocolate Syrup (7.5 pounds!)
    • Restaurant Gift Card
    • JO H2O Flavored Lubricant

    Hearing

    • Metal Chime Ball Necklace
    • Romantic or Sensual Music Playlist
    • Sony Waterproof Bluetooth Speaker
    • White Noise Machine

    Touch

    • LovePlay Massage Candle
    • Liberator Fascinator Throw
    • CSFP Sex Position Cards
    • Infinite Moon EverSheets

    10 Best Things About Sex Nov 09, 2021
    Show notes

    What are the best things about sex? We compiled a list of ten and hope it will inspire you to pursue better and deeper intimacy in your marriage.

    Sponsor

    Black Friday sale: 13% off store-wide!

    Visit Married Dance HERE.

    Also check out Make My Own Soap! Use coupon code 10off for $10 off the one-pound loaf starter kit. Use coupon code 20off for $20 off the LOAF starter kit.

    From the Bible

    What does the Bible say about the best things about sex?

    I belong to my beloved, and his desire is for me. – Song of Songs 7:10

    "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. – Ephesians 5:31-32 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed. – Genesis 2:24-25

    Resources

    • 10 Surprising Health Benefits of Sex (webmd.com)
    • Unlock Your Orgasm: Through a Christian Lens by Bonny Logsdon Burns
    • Orgasm Webinar
    • Hot, Holy, and Humorous: Sex in Marriage by God's Design by J. Parker
    • Episode 58: Orgasm
    • Episode 114: Pursuing Playfulness in Sexual Intimacy
    • Touchstone: Sex Is Fun, Part 1 | The Forgiven Wife
    • Boom-Boom Playtime: Sex Is Fun, Part 2 | The Forgiven Wife
    • Sex Is Like Rose-Colored Glasses - Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Strategy #10 - Build Sexual Confidence - Physical Confidence - Calm.Healthy.Sexy.
    • Strategy #11 - Build Sexual Confidence - Knowledge - Calm.Healthy.Sexy.
    • Build Sexual Confidence by Taking Action - Calm.Healthy.Sexy.
    • Why Sex Should Be Hot, Holy, and Humorous - Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Is Sex a Spiritual Experience in Your Marriage? - Hot, Holy & Humorous

    Visit our website: forchristianwives.com


    Sex Is For You Too Oct 27, 2021
    Show notes

    We want you to understand that sex is for you too! This is an idea we discuss frequently in our episodes, but today it is our focus.

    1. Why do we even need to have this conversation?
    2. Why do so many women struggle with the idea that sex is for them?
    3. Is it okay for sex sometimes to be primarily for one spouse? If so, when and how would that work?
    4. What can you actually do to make sex for you as well?

    Sponsor

    Use coupon code 10off for $10 off the one-pound loaf starter kit.

    Use coupon code 20off for $20 off the LOAF starter kit.

    Click here to visit the sponsor.

    From the Bible

    What does the Bible say about sex being for you too?

    Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you— if you find my beloved, what will you tell him? Tell him I am faint with love. – Song of Songs 5:18

    Come, my beloved, let us go to the countryside, let us spend the night in the villages. Let us go early to the vineyards to see if the vines have budded, if their blossoms have opened, and if the pomegranates are in bloom— there I will give you my love. The mandrakes send out their fragrance, and at our door is every delicacy, both new and old, that I have stored up for you, my beloved. –Song of Songs 7:11-13 "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. – Ephesians 5:31-32

    Resources

    • You Deserve a Great Sex Life Too - CalmHealthySexy
    • Love Like a Woman: Should Your Sexual Response Be Like Your Husbands? - The Forgiven Wife
    • What a Quickie Taught Us About Sexual Intimacy - The Forgiven Wife
    • Why "10 Minutes and Lube" Is Horrible Advice - The Forgiven Wife
    • How Not to Think About Sex - The Forgiven Wife
    • Learn What You Like in Bed - The Forgiven Wife
    • Learn to Embrace Your Sexuality - The Forgiven Wife
    • Nurture Your Sexual Desire - Honeycomb & Spice
    • Wives, Your Voice Matters (in the Bedroom & Beyond) - Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • High-Drive Wives Are Not Crockpots - Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Where Purity Culture Got It Wrong, Let's Get It Right - Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs - Wikipedia
    • Sexual Desire and Arousal: The Nonlinear Model (Rosemary Basson) - ObG Project
    • These 3 Actions Could Bring You to Orgasm - Hot, Holy & Humorous (orgasm gap)
    • Unlock Your Orgasm: Through a Christian Lens by Bonny Logsdon Burns (affiliate link)
    • Understanding Your Sex Drive – Webinar Replay
    • Pillow Talk: 40 Conversations about Sex for Married Couples by J. Parker
    • Strong Wives Coaching Support with Bonny Burns
    • Faithful Counseling (affiliate link)

    Visit our website: forchristianwives.com


    Prayer and Sex Oct 13, 2021
    Show notes About this episode

    1 Thessalonians 5 tells us to rejoice always, pray continually, and give thanks in all circumstances. Today we're going to talk about what this means in relation to sex. How can we pray about sex or during sex?

    1. Some wives may think it seems a little weird to be thinking about prayer and sex. Why is that?
    2. What does the Bible say about prayer and sex?
    3. How can we help ourselves get more comfortable talking to God when it comes to sex?
    4. What are some ways we can pray ABOUT sex?
    5. What can we pray about DURING sex?
    Sponsor Enter discount code FCWSPECIAL for 10% off! Visit Share the Soap From the Bible He

    I came to my garden, my sister, my bride, I gathered my myrrh with my spice, I ate my honeycomb with my honey, I drank my wine with my milk.

    Others

    Eat, friends, drink, and be drunk with love!

    ~ Song of Songs 5:1

    Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. ~ Philippians 4:6–7

    Is anyone among you in trouble? Let them pray. Is anyone happy? Let them sing songs of praise. ~ James 5:13

    If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. ~ James 1:5

    Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. ~ Thessalonians 5:16-17

    Resources
    • Hot Holy & Humorous's series on Praying for Your Marriage Bed (lots of info & ideas!)
    • How To Pray For Sexual Intimacy In your Marriage (unveiledwife.com) -guest post by J. Parker
    • Praying Before, During, and After Sex - Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • I Love Learning to Pray for Sexual Intimacy • Bonny's Oysterbed7
    • Intimacy Revealed: 52 Devotions to Enhance Sex in Marriage by J. Parker
    • "In Bed" (Or, Lessons from a Fortune Cookie) - The Forgiven Wife

    On Fantasy, Focus & Feeling Betrayed (Listener Questions) Sep 29, 2021
    Show notes

    We are down one host with Chris out today, but Gaye, Bonny, and I are here to answer your questions. If you have a question that you'd like us to address, head to our website, click the Ask a Question tab, and shoot us an email.

    While we cannot respond to all of your questions, we try to cover a lot of ground and answer what we can. Be sure to go back through our older episodes as well to see if we might have covered a topic you're wondering about.

    1. "[My husband] continues to look at other women and images that are so easily available outside our home. My question is; Am I wrong to be upset by this habit? Are my expectations too high? How do I learn to trust when I feel so betrayed when I see him look? Do I need counseling to truly move past this?"
    2. "My husband and I have a great sex life… The problem is that I want sex with him AND I fantasize about other men too." AND "I have struggled in that last few years with other men popping into my mind during sex… I sometimes just don't know how to handle a quiet mind so random thing will try to steal my attention/make noise in my mind. Wondering how I can enhance my intimacy with mental focus."
    3. "I am definitely the lower drive spouse and I think it's mostly because I have so much trouble getting turned on. It takes sooo long and we don't have a lot of extra time with our toddler around. I am struggling the most with talking with my husband during sex… I feel like I'm grasping at that turned on feeling and any little thing pulls me out of it. My husband is very very kind, patient and wanting to do what I need but I feel like I can't quite do it and I feel like I'm letting him down. I want sex to be good but I can't get the communication thing down. Any tips?"

    Sponsor

    Visit the site: sharethesoap.com Discount Code: FCWSPECIAL 10% off!

    From the Bible

    But they delight in the law of the Lord, meditating on it day and night. - Psalm 1:2 (NLT) I belong to my beloved, and his desire is for me. - Song of Songs 7:10 Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth—for your love is more delightful than wine. - Song of Songs 1:2 His left arm is under my head, and his right arm embraces me. - Song of Songs 2:6, 8:3 Resources Bonny Burns, APSAT trained coaching Mindfulness & Meditation During Sex | Hot, Holy & Humorous Does Your Husband Look at Other Women? | Hot, Holy & Humorous 4 Ways to Be Present During Sex | Forgiven Wife Yada, Yada, Yada…Talking During Sex | Hot, Holy & Humorous Episode 45: Foreplay Episode 77: How to Ask for What You Want Episode 90: Getting Him to Touch You Where You Want Getting in the Mood Webinar – Replay Foreplay Webinar – Replay Pillow Talk: 40 Conversations about Sex for Married Couples by J. Parker Dear Wife, You Deserve a Great Sex Life Too | Calm.Healthy.Sexy. Visit our website: forchristianwives.com

    Sex When Life is Overwhelming Sep 15, 2021
    Show notes

    Today we're going to give you a little update on what's happening with us, talk about what might be happening with you, and then discuss what that might mean for your sex life and your marriage.

    Sponsor

    Try discount code 4CW at checkout.

    From the Bible

    What does the Bible say about when life is overwhelming?

    When I said, "My foot is slipping," your unfailing love, Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy. – Psalm 94:18-19 But now, this is what the Lord says— he who created you, Jacob, he who formed you, Israel: "Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. – Isaiah 43:1-2 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." – Matthew 11:28

    Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. – 1 Peter 5:7

    Resources

    • 5 Simple Ways to Take Care of Yourself in a Crisis - CalmHealthySexy
    • You Probably Need More Sleep - CalmHealthySexy
    • Create Energy in Your Life with Exercise - CalmHealthySexy
    • Decide that You are Worth It - HealthyLifeToolbox
    • 4 Ways to Be Present During Sex - The Forgiven Wife
    • Rest in God - The Forgiven Wife
    • Just Breathe - The Forgiven Wife

    And remember if you need or want counseling, we recommend*:

    *affiliate link

    Visit our website: forchristianwives.com


    Pursuing Playfulness in Sexual Intimacy Aug 31, 2021
    Show notes About this episode

    We are going to discuss practical ways to help you discover fun and playfulness between you and your husband. We talk a lot about being lighthearted during sexual intimacy, and today we want to spark your creativity.

    1. What are some obstacles you can think of that would hinder playfulness in a married couple's sexual relationship?
    2. What would you say to a friend who sees playfulness as a challenge to incorporate into her sexual relationship with her husband?
    3. What are some practical ideas to find light-heartedness or create playfulness during intimate moments?
    4. What does the Bible say about fun?
    Sponsor Click Here to Learn More From the Bible

    What does God have to say about positions?

    So I commend the enjoyment of life, because there is nothing better for a person under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad. Then joy will accompany them in their toil all the days of the life God has given them under the sun. – Ecclesiastes 8:15 (NIV)

    A merry heart does good, like medicine, but a broken spirit dries the bones.. – Proverbs 17:22 (NKJV)

    A joyful heart makes a face cheerful, but a sad heart produces a broken spirit. – Proverbs 15:13 (CSB)

    Resources
    • Episode 25: Sex Is Funny - Sex Chat for Christian Wives
    • Do You Have Inside Jokes About Sex? (intimacyinmarriage.com) – guest post from J. Parker
    • Lighten Up! And Laugh a Little about Sex | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Does He Make You Laugh? | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Is Joking about Sex Okay? | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • What Euphemisms for Sex Do You Use? | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Hugh Jackman Says His Life Motto Is 'Happy Wife, Happy Life' (usmagazine.com)
    • Sex Games for Couples | Married Dance (affiliate link)
    • Glow in the Dark Body Paint | Amazon (affiliate link)
    • Fried Green Tomatoes "Saran Wrap Scene" (with actress Kathy Bates)
    • Riding the Train | Awaken Love
    • Give Your Husband a Sexy Surprise | The Forgiven Wife
    • The Flirtation Experiment: Putting Magic, Mystery, and Spark Into Your Everyday Marriage, by Lisa Jacobson and Phylicia Masonheimer
    • Episode 34: Food and Sex

    The Most Pleasurable Sex Positions Aug 17, 2021
    Show notes

    About this episode

    Today's episode has a tantalizing title, but what we're really talking about are positions that work especially well for a wife, ones that don't work, and positions might give you a better opportunity to orgasm.

    1. Let's revisit some basic concepts first and discuss why sexual positioning matters.
    2. What are some of the more comfortable or pleasurable sex positions for the wife?
    3. Now how about what Bonny has called #positionfail? That is, positions you or others have tried that Did Not Work Out?
    4. What are some sex positions that could provide a good way for a wife to reach climax?
    Sponsor Click Here to Learn More From the Bible

    What does God have to say about positions?

    His left arm is under my head, and his right arm embraces me. – Song of Songs 2:6, 8:3

    Resources
    • Episode 2: Sex Positions
    • Episode 57: Listener Questions (includes thoughts on positions)
    • Episode 87: Trying New Sex Positions
    • Wedge Pillow – Married Dance (affiliate link)
    • Why You Should Try This Sex Position | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Sexual Positions in Your Marriage: Hey, I'm a Housewife, Not a Gymnast
    • Unlock Your Orgasm: Through a Christian Lens by Bonny Logsdon Burns
    • "Considering Sexual Positions," Hot, Holy, and Humorous: Sex in Marriage by God's Design, by J. Parker
    • Coital Alignment Technique (CAT), a climax enhancing position
    • Packing the Suitcase, Christian Friendly Sex Positions
    • The first to identify the position J is referring to on Christian Friendly Sex Positions by emailing forchristianwives@gmail.com will receive a copy of her book, Hot, Holy & Humorous, AND Bonny's Unlock Your Orgasm. Wow!

    Are You Compromising Too Much? (Listener Question) Aug 03, 2021
    Show notes

    Today, we discuss a question that a reader submitted recently:

    How far is too far? How much do I compromise? I know I'm not perfect. I know I could have showed up more in the bedroom and have said as much. But I do try. It's hard as a woman, wife and now mother of 2. He says I don't listen and no one ever listens. So, he demands I do things I do not like. At times, it's not so bad. I can't handle it when he is angry. He gets rough. And then when I ultimately refuse he is so fed up and angry he leaves me feeling like I just will never be able to make him happy. I am feeling hopeless. And I struggle with knowing if I really need to be doing more or if I'm over compromising. I love my husband. We have been together almost 9 years, and I consider him my best friend. However, at times I wonder if we can ever get past this to live a happy marriage.

    Sponsor

    Click HERE to Learn More

    And check out Bonny's STRONG WIVES website!

    From the Bible

    What does God have to say about this topic?

    The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. – 1 Corinthians 7:3-5

    Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. – 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a

    But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. – Galatians 5:22-23

    Now Adam knew Eve his wife, and she conceived and bore Cain, saying, "I have gotten a man with the help of the Lord." – Genesis 4:1

    As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. – Proverbs 27:17

    But whether we are at home with the Lord or away from him, we still try our best to please him. – 2 Corinthians 9:10 (CEV)

    For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed, and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought out into the open. – Luke 8:17

    Resources

    • Who I am in Christ - pdf
    • Boundaries in Marriage by Henry Cloud & John Townsend (affiliate link)
    • Setting Boundaries in the Bedroom | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Q&A with J: Boundaries in the Bedroom | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Are You in an Abusive or Destructive Marriage? | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Signs of depression in men: What to know (medicalnewstoday.com)
    • Faithful Counseling (now Better Help)- affiliate link
    • Prevalence of Distress Associated With Difficulty Controlling Sexual Urges, Feelings, and Behaviors in the United States | Psychiatry and Behavioral Health | JAMA Network Open | JAMA Network (10% stat Bonny mentioned)
    • Episode 109: Your Sexual Self
    • How Should You Pray for Your Spouse? | Hot, Holy & Humorous

    Visit our website: forchristianwives.com


    Accepting Your Body Jul 20, 2021
    Show notes About this episode

    Today we're talking about feeling comfortable in your body. This is a struggle for so many women, and it affects every area of our lives—inside and outside the bedroom.

    1. So, ladies, when we say "getting comfortable with your body," what does that mean? And why is it so hard to do?
    2. What are some of ways that body discomfort shows up in women's lives?
    3. And, of course, feeling uncomfortable with your body tends to show up with a vengeance in the bedroom. Why is that the case, and what impact does body discomfort have on women's sex lives?
    4. What are some things women can do to begin that process and start moving forward?
    Sponsor Click Here to Shop at Infinite Moon From the Bible

    What does God have to say about getting comfortable with your body?

    So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. - Genesis 1:27

    For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:13-14

    Resources
    • Body by God | The Forgiven Wife
    • 4 Ways to Be Present During Sex | The Forgiven Wife
    • A Wife's Breasts Have History! | The Forgiven Wife
    • Enjoy a Plus-Size Sex Life, Part 1 | Honeycomb & Spice
    • Enjoy a Plus-Size Sex Life, Part 2 | Honeycomb & Spice
    • 3 Reasons to Love Your Body | Calm.Healthy.Sexy.
    • 11 Ways to Love Your Body | Calm.Healthy.Sexy.
    • How to Get Your Mind and Body on the Same Page | Calm.Healthy.Sexy.
    • Episode 109: Your Sexual Self
    • What Not to Wear | Watch Full Episodes & More! - TLC
    • Body Image: Why Are We So Hard on Ourselves? | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Feeling Beautiful: A Wife's Goal for 2015 | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Real Women Come in All Shapes and Sizes | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Getting Comfortable Being Naked with Your Husband | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Tips for Confidently Baring It All for Your Hubby | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Forget What You Look Like While Making Love | Hot, Holy & Humorous
    • Grow Old With Me (Remastered 2010) - YouTube (based on Robert Browning poem) or the lovely cover from Mary Chapin Carpenter
    • Episode 74: Getting Comfortable with Your Body - Sex Chat for Christian Wives

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