Sex and Psychology Podcast

Latest Episodes:

Episode 359: Are You Having “Good Enough” Sex? Jan 03, 2025

Show notes

Sexual problems are common. So how do we fix them? In today’s episode, we’re going to dive into the Good Enough Sex Model. It’s a radically different way of thinking about sex that can help us both in preventing problems from emerging in the first place, as well as fixing problems when they appear.

My guest is Dr. Barry McCarthy. He is an emeritus professor of psychology at American University and a certified couple’s therapist. He has published more than 150 academic papers and chapters, and has authored or co-authored 24 books. In 2016 he received the Masters and Johnson award for lifetime contributions to the sexuality field.

Some of the topics we address in this episode include:

Why do we need more than just medication when it comes to fixing sexual problems?
What is the Good Enough Sex Model? How is it different from other forms of sex therapy?
How can we set realistic expectations for resolving sexual problems?
Why is playfulness such an important element of good sex?
How can parters resolve disagreements about sex in a healthy way?

You can check out Barry’s Psychology Today profile to read more of his work.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

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The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute.

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Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Episode 358: Resolutions for Thriving Relationships (Essential Listen) Dec 31, 2024

Show notes

Now is the perfect time to make some resolutions for healthy relationships in the New Year! In previous year-end episodes, we covered sexual resolutions (see episodes 155 and 253), so in this show, we’re going to focus on relationship resolutions. We’ll be talking about tips for making new friends, strengthening romantic relationships, and building a healthier relationship with yourself.

Today, we’re going to revisit one of Sex and Psychology’s Essential Listens: my interview with Dr. Juliana Hauser, which originally appeared back in episode 156. Dr. Juliana is a licensed marriage and family therapist and licensed professional counselor who specializes in relationships, sex, and sexuality. In addition to running a private practice, she is a nationally known expert in this area whose work has appeared all over in the media.

Some of the topics we dive into include:

What are some ways of meeting new people in the new year?
How can we balance having strong friendships that don’t interfere with our romantic relationships?
How can we resolve to be better online daters in the new year?
What are some ways we can cultivate better communication skills with our partners?

You can check out Juliana’s website to learn more about her work.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

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Thank you to our sponsors!

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Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Episode 357: Navigating ADHD and Sex Dec 27, 2024

Show notes

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a topic that is rarely discussed in terms of how it affects adults’ intimate lives, but it’s something we need to talk about. Research suggests that around 40% of adults with ADHD experience at least one form of sexual dysfunction. In today’s show, we’re going to explore what you need to know about ADHD, sex, and relationships.

I am joined by Cate Osborn, a certified sex educator, mental health advocate, and full-time content creator, with ADHD. As a professional table top role-playing game performer, she is passionate about opening conversations about neurodiversity and accessibility in the gaming and BDSM/kink communities.

Some of the specific questions we answer in this episode include:

Why is ADHD linked to both lower and higher sexual desire?
How does ADHD affect orgasm?
Are there gender differences in how ADHD impacts sex?
What are some of the ways ADHD can affect relationships outside of the bedroom?
If you’re someone who finds yourself constantly distracted during sex, what can you do about this?

You can check out Cate’s website to learn more about her work.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

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Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Episode 356: Why Holiday Romance Movies Are So Popular Dec 24, 2024

Show notes

Over the last couple of decades, holiday movies have increasingly centered around love and romance, and they’re growing massively in popularity. In this episode, we’re going to dive into the rise of romance-themed holiday media and how this intersects with cuffing season, or the increased tendency for people to partner-up during the winter months.

I am joined once again by Dr. Paul Eastwick and Dr. Eli Finkel. Dr. Eastwick is a Professor at the University of California, Davis, where he studies romantic attraction and close relationships. Dr. Finkel is a professor at Northwestern University and author of the bestselling book The All-Or-Nothing Marriage: How the Best Marriages Work, which we discussed back in Episode 45. Together, they co-host the Love Factually podcast.

Some of the specific questions we answer in this episode include:

Why is so much holiday media focused on themes of love and romance?
What’s the science behind “cuffing season?”
Is it a good or bad thing that holiday media focuses so much on romance?
Is Die Hard really a Christmas movie?

You can check out the Love Factually podcast website to learn more.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

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Thank you to our sponsors!

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Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Episode 355: The Rise of Sentient Object Romance Dec 20, 2024

Show notes

“Sentient object romance” is an increasingly popular erotica genre in which humans get ravished by inanimate objects that come to life. Some of the most wonderfully absurd titles I’ve seen in this area include “Glazed by the Gay Living Donuts” and “This Pumpkin Spice Latte Gets Me Off.” In today’s show, we’re going to explore the appeal of sentient object romance with an author who has published dozens of books in this area.

I am joined by Chuck Tingle, a USA Today bestselling author, two-time Hugo Award finalist, and Bram Stoker Award nominee. He is a mysterious force of energy behind sunglasses and a pink mask. He is also an anonymous author of romance, horror, and fantasy. Chuck writes to prove love is real, because love is the most important tool we have when resisting the endless cosmic void.

Some of the topics we dive into include:

What do people find appealing or arousing about sentient objects?
Why are some people attracted to objects in real life?
How does attraction to objects intersect with neurodiversity?
What’s the political subtext behind sentient object romance?

You can check out Chuck’s website to learn more about his work, and check out all of his books here.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

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Thank you to our sponsors!

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Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Episode 354: Why Gay Men Have a Higher Risk of Erectile Dysfunction Dec 17, 2024

Show notes

Research has found that gay men are substantially more likely to experience erectile dysfunction than heterosexual men, whereas heterosexual men are more likely to experience premature ejaculation than gay men. So what’s up with that? In this episode, we’re going dive into the science that can help to explain this curious pattern, as well as discuss tips for dealing with ED.

I am joined once again by Tom Bruett, a licensed marriage and family therapist, trainer, consultant, and author who works extensively with the queer community. He is the founder of the Queer Relationship Institute, and author of the book The Go-To Relationship Guide for Gay Men: From Honeymoon to Lasting Commitment, which will be published in March 2025.

Some of the specific questions we answer in this episode include:

How common is ED among gay men?
How does performance anxiety impact gay men, and how do you deal with this?
How do recreational drugs impact sexual functioning?
What are some strategies to improve erectile function?
How might rapid ejaculation be viewed differently in gay vs. heterosexual contexts?

You can learn more by checking out the Queer Relationship Institute’s Linktree.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

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Thank you to our sponsors!

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Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Episode 353: Dating And Relationship Tips For Gay Men Dec 13, 2024

Show notes

Most relationship advice is tailored to heterosexual folks. And while some of that is also applicable queer relationships, not all of it is. Queer relationships are unique and therefore need relationship advice that’s tailored to them. My guest today has a forthcoming book that offers a relationship guide for gay men, so that’s what we’re going to be talking about in this show.

I am joined by Tom Bruett, a licensed marriage and family therapist, trainer, consultant, and author who works extensively with the queer community. He is the founder of the Queer Relationship Institute, and author of the book The Go-To Relationship Guide for Gay Men: From Honeymoon to Lasting Commitment, which will be published in March 2025.

Some of the specific questions we answer in this episode include:

What are the unique stages that gay men’s relationships go through?
What’s the deal with gay men and “daddy issues?”
For gay men who struggle to make a relationship last beyond the honeymoon stage, what do they need to know?
How can understanding your attachment style help in navigating dating and relationships?
How do you find a sex or relationship therapist who is knowledgable and gay-affirming?

You can learn more by checking out the Queer Relationship Institute’s Linktree.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

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Thank you to our sponsors!

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Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Episode 352: Inside the World of Financial Domination Dec 10, 2024

Show notes

Financial domination or findom involves a submissive (usually a man) who gives money or control of their finances to a dominant partner (usually a woman). The sub is not expecting anything in return—it’s about submitting, giving up control, sometimes being humiliated, and being aroused by all of this. So why are people into findom, and why does it seem to be growing in popularity?

My guest today is Jessica van Meir, a PhD candidate at the Harvard Kennedy School who studies sex work. Jessica is co-founder of MintStars, a subscription platform for content creators, models, and their fans. She also co-authored a chapter in the new book Sex Work Today: Erotic Labor in the 21st Century that explores the rise of financial kinks.

Some of the specific questions we answer in this episode include:

Who’s into findom and why?
How is findom similar to or different from sugar dating?
What’s the connection between findom, our growing economic crises, and capitalism?
How can findom serve as a way of coping with financial precarity?
How does findom both challenge and reinforce traditional gender power dynamics?

To learn more about Jessica, follow her on the socials at @jessicavanmeir.bsky.social

You can get 30% off Sex Work Today when you input code NYUP30 at checkout on nyupress.org.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

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Thank you to our sponsors!

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Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Episode 351: The Pornification of America Dec 06, 2024

Show notes

These days, it seems like sex is everywhere you look. We live in a very pornified culture in many ways, but it wasn’t always like this. So what changed? In today’s show, we’re going to explore the rise of “raunch culture.” Some of the topics we’ll discuss include the effects of living in a hypersexualized society, the mixed messages that women receive about sex, and why raunch culture and purity culture co-exist.

I am joined once again by Dr. Bernadette Barton, a Professor of Sociology and the Director of Gender Studies at Morehead State University. Barton is co-editor of the new book Sex Work Today: Erotic Labor in the 21st Century. She is also author of the book The Pornification of America. Her research and teaching explore contemporary issues of gender, sexuality, religion, culture, happiness, and the sex industry.

Some of the specific questions we answer in this episode include:

What is “raunch culture?”
When and why did our culture start to become so highly pornified?
Is raunch culture empowering to women?
Is the hypersexualization of society a sign of sex-positivity?
Raunch culture and purity culture seem at odds with one another, so how do they exist simultaneously?

You can get 30% off Sex Work Today when you input code NYUP30 at checkout on nyupress.org.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

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Thank you to our sponsors!

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Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Episode 350: The Rise of Sugar Dating Dec 03, 2024

Show notes

Sugar dating typically involves an older, wealthy person who financially supports a younger, attractive partner in exchange for companionship and intimacy, and sometimes sex. In today’s episode, we’re going to explore the growing popularity of sugar dating and the unique grey area that it occupies in between traditional dating and sex work.

My guest is Dr. Bernadette Barton, a Professor of Sociology and the Director of Gender Studies at Morehead State University. Barton is co-editor of the new book Sex Work Today: Erotic Labor in the 21st Century. Her research and teaching explore contemporary issues of gender, sexuality, religion, culture, happiness, and the sex industry.

Some of the specific questions we answer in this episode include:

What are some common examples of sugaring arrangements?
How is sugar dating different from traditional dating?
Is sugar dating sex work?
What’s the legal status of sugar dating?
Who holds the power in sugar dating relationships?

You can get 30% off Sex Work Today when you input code NYUP30 at checkout on nyupress.org.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

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Thank you to our sponsors!

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Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

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