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    Kids & Family

    Securely Attached

    Securely Attached is your go-to parenting podcast, supporting moms and dads from pregnancy all the way through their child’s adolescence and every stage in between.

    Join us every Tuesday as clinical psychologist and mom of two Dr. Sarah Bren shares her expertise and interviews top experts in the field, simplifying complicated concepts and pulling back the curtain on the brain science and psychology that drives and shapes the parent-child relationship.

    And now, every Thursday, Dr. Sarah Bren is joined by Dr. Emily Upshur and Dr. Rebecca Hershberg for a special segment, Beyond The Sessions. We’re answering YOUR parenting questions from the perspective of clinical psychologists highly trained in developmental science and real-life moms who get that parenting is messy, and sometimes we have to laugh, cry, and throw out the “rules.”

    From toddler tantrums, to effective discipline strategies, to leaning into the principles of respectful parenting, and to managing your own mental wellness as a parentβ€”this podcast is your ultimate resource for judgment-free, research-backed information you know you can trust.

    About Sarah Bren, PhD
    Dr. Sarah Bren is a licensed clinical psychologist and mom of two who helps parents understand the building blocks of child development and how secure relationships form and thrive. Her work is focused on helping parents find their inner confidence so they can respond to any parenting problem that comes along and raise kids who are healthy, resilient, and kind.

    Advertise

    Copyright: Β© 2023

    • Apple Podcasts
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    Latest Episodes:
    Understanding parental dysregulation: How to identify and manage your triggers with Dr. Amber Thornton Oct 08, 2024
    Show notes

    Join me for a deep dive into the essential aspects of emotional regulation in parenting with clinical psychologist, Dr. Amber Thornton.

    In this episode we explore:

    - Cognitive, emotional, physical, and physiological regulation - the differences between all four and how this knowledge can help you feel more grounded.

    - Dr. Amber shares her PCR Method that parents can use to identify and manage their own dysregulation.

    - How to understand your parenting triggers (because we all have them!) so you can use more effective strategies tailored to your unique nervous system.

    - Gain practical approaches for reparenting yourself to meet the needs of your younger self.

    - Why being an imperfect parent is actually beneficial, and even optimal, for your child's development!

    - How understanding the scientific principles of attachment theory can help reduce fear and lower the stakes we feel in parenthood.

    Discover practical strategies to help you navigate the challenges of parenthood while fostering a healthier connection with your children.

    LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. AMBER:

    https://www.dramberthornton.com/

    READ DR. AMBER'S BOOK:

    πŸ“š A Parent's Guide to Self-Regulation: A Practical Framework for Breaking the Cycle of Dysregulation and Mastering Emotions for Parents and Children

    WATCH DR. AMBER ON YOUTUBE:

    πŸ’» https://www.youtube.com/@dramberthornton

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    πŸ‘‰πŸ» Click HERE for my workshop, Be the Calm in Your Child's Storm: How to Keep Your Cool When Your Child Loses Theirs, to get the exact therapeutic interventions I use with my patients that can change the way your brain and body interprets your child's dysregulation to help you stay cool in the heat of the moment.

    πŸ‘‰πŸ» Click HERE to download my free guide, The Four Pillars of Fostering Secure Attachment, helping you parent with a focus on attunement and trust.

    FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:

    @dramberthornton

    @drsarahbren

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 The psychology behind dysregulation with Cara Goodwin

    🎧 Teaching children emotion regulation skills through coregulation with Dana Rosenbloom

    🎧 What to do before, during and after we lose our cool: Helping parents navigate their own big feelings with Dr. Cindy Hovington


    Q&A: How can I help my child overcome a phobia? Oct 03, 2024
    Show notes

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...

    - What is a phobia, and how can it show up (like, for this 7-year-old who developed a fear of vomiting after having a stomach bug) in kids?

    - How to recognize when your child's phobia or anxiety might require additional support versus when soothing and comfort may be enough to help them through their discomfort.

    - When to treat child anxiety or phobias with CBT and when to use a SPACE approach - and how to determine the best fit for your child.

    - What a supportive statement is and how it can be a powerful first step to helping your child manage their fears (plus, why mastering it can mean your job as a parent is done!)

    - A counterintuitive approach: how reframing our own responsibility to focus on our responses and behaviors rather than trying to change our child's behavior can take a huge weight and pressure off a parent's shoulders.

    - The biggest mistake that Dr. Sarah and Dr. Emily see parents make when they try to implement a SPACE approach - and how to avoid this pitfall.

    REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

    πŸ“š Breaking Free of Child Anxiety and OCD: A Scientifically Proven Program for Parents by Eli R. Lebowitz, PhD

    πŸ‘‰πŸ» If you're interested in exploring support options for your child's anxiety, including SPACE small groups and one-on-one interventions, feel free to reach out to us at Upshur Bren Psychology Group for a free 15-minute consultation so we can suggest a treatment plan for your unique needs.

    WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT CHILDHOOD ANXIETY:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the creator of SPACE (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) Dr. Eli Lebowitz

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about using SPACE to treat ARFID with Dr. Yaara Shimshoni

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about when it may be time for a mental health intervention to help your child manage their anxiety symptoms

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about navigating your child's anxiety with Dr. Terri Bacow

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!


    Have phones displaced our ability to play and have fun? How to be intentional with your tech use with Catherine Price Oct 01, 2024
    Show notes

    After the birth of her daughter, Catherine Price noticed a disconnectβ€”her baby was looking up at her, while she was looking down at her phone. This sparked her interest in understanding why our phones are so hard to put down, what that's doing to our memory, creativity, and overall lived experience, and how we can break free from the grip of technology to live more intentional lives.

    In this episode we explore:

    - Catherine's definition of fun: The overlapping of playfulness, connection, and flow. Plus, how understanding each can help us experience genuine fun that refills our buckets.

    - When our jobs don't have a clear start time and end time, it can become addicting to staying connected 24/7. Tune in for specific strategies to intentionally combat this.

    - Catherine coaches Dr. Sarah through the relatable struggles she and so many parents experience when attempting to put down the phone (Sneak peek: it's taken her 6 months to plug in the alarm clock she bought instead of using her phone next to her bed.)

    - An easy first step people can take to cut the cord with their phone.

    - Strategies for when and how to communicate with your kids about screen time (that don't cause them to shut down or feel defensive). Plus, how to break down the process of getting your kid their first phone into smaller steps that usher them more gradually into the digital world.

    - Setting appropriate tech boundaries that honor your family's values while also taking into consideration how much of kids' social lives are facilitated through technology today.

    Listen now for insights and actionable tips to help you free yourself from your screens to have more fun!

    LEARN MORE ABOUT CATHERINE PRICE:

    https://catherineprice.com/

    READ CATHERINE'S BOOKS:

    πŸ“š The Power of Fun: How to Feel Alive Again

    πŸ“š How to Break Up with Your Phone: The 30-Day Plan to Take Back Your Life

    JOIN CATHERINE'S SUBSTACK:

    πŸ“– How to Feel Alive with Catherine Price

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    πŸ‘‰πŸ» Click HERE to sign up for Dr. Sarah's newsletter to find out if she is able to complete Catherine's challenge to take her phone out of her bedroom for the weekend!

    🀳 Opal - The app Dr. Sarah said she uses to help her manage her screen time.

    πŸ“± ScreenZen, Brick, and Unpluq- Products Catherine recommends to help people manage their screen use.

    πŸ“Ί Watch Diane Sawyer's ABC News report, Screen Time

    πŸ“³ Pinwheel, Gabb, and Troomi - Kid and teen phones Catherine mentions in the episode.

    πŸ“š Read The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt and the The New York Times essay, Gen Z Has Regrets by Jonathan Haidt and Will Johnson

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Regulation, reward systems, and rest: Rewiring the way our kids interact with screens with Alé Duarte

    🎧 How play could be the key to mental health and well-being with Dr. Mike Rucker

    🎧 What are the do's and don't for introducing screens to my toddler?

    🎧 Helping our children form a healthy relationship to technology with Emily Cherkin


    Q&A: How can I help my child with separation anxiety for a smoother daycare drop off? Sep 26, 2024
    Show notes

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...

    - Understanding the basics of your child's cognitive development can help inform what you do to soothe them when they have a hard time transitioning to daycare each morning.

    - How important your own calm nervous system is for helping your child feel safe.

    - What to do in the moment at drop off when your child is crying, struggling, or having a hard time settling in.

    - What you can do outside the heat of the moment to build your child's ability to separate from you and relieve some of the stress surrounding going to daycare that they feel.

    - What a warm handoff looks like and how you can work with the daycare providers to create an environment that makes it easier for your child to say goodbye.

    REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

    πŸ“š Read my blog for helping your child transition to a new daycare

    🎢 Listen with your child to the Daniel Tiger song, Grownups Come Back

    🎧 Tune in to my podcast interview with Eileen Henry on getting toddlers to stay in their own bed at night

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!


    Processing birth trauma: How to make sense of, heal, and move forward after a difficult birthing experience with Dr. Sterling Sep 24, 2024
    Show notes

    Dr. Sterling, ObGyn and founder of Sterling Parents, dives deep into the complex relationship between stress, trauma, pregnancy, and birth.

    In this episode we explore:

    - The impact of stress and anxiety on fetal development and pregnancy outcomes.

    - What birth trauma is, how frequently it occurs, and common symptoms people may feel (and may not even realize is trauma).

    - Dr. Sterling shares her own deeply personal and inspiring experience struggling with and working to heal from the trauma she experienced after the birth of her first child.

    - Why so many women downplay and minimize their symptoms, and how this can inadvertently be a block to their healing.

    - Practical tips for what you can do during pregnancy to reduce the potential risk of experiencing birth trauma.

    - Steps you can take immediately after birth, or even years later, to begin healing from trauma.

    - You do not have one shot at having an empowering birth - how to make meaning of what happened to you so you can shift your birth trauma into a positive experience for yourself!

    LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. STERLING:

    https://sterlingparents.com/about-us/

    JOIN DR. STERLING'S MEMBERSHIP PROGRAM:

    https://sterlingparents.com/waitlist/

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    🀳 DOWNLOAD my free postpartum mental health checklist

    🎧 LISTEN to my first interview with Dr. Sterling about the physical and emotional challenges of pregnancy and postpartum

    🎧 LISTEN to an episode about using Internal Family Systems to emotionally support mothers with the creators of The Mothercentric Approach

    WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT PARENTING COACHING AND INDIVIDUAL THERAPY?

    πŸ‘‰πŸ» If you're interested in exploring support options, feel free to reach out to us at Upshur Bren Psychology Group for a free 15-minute consultation so we can suggest a treatment plan for your unique needs.


    Q&A: How can I support my child's self-confidence when she calls herself dumb? Sep 19, 2024
    Show notes

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...

    - The urge may be to talk your child out of thinking they're "dumb," but it can be helpful to stay with this feeling and lean into being curious about her experience.

    - How to zoom out and determine if your child is speaking out of frustration and is just emoting or if they actually have internalized that they think they aren't smart.

    - How to talk with your child in a way that helps build back their confidence in themself when they are struggling to learn something new, like reading.

    - We also want to try not to catastrophize this situation either - just because your child is saying this doesn't mean they will permanently have a poor self-image.

    - You can boost your child's self-confidence by feeling confident in their ability to handle the challenges they face.

    - How to get clear with your kid about what they think "smart" and "dumb" means, and building flexibility around those ideas.

    REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

    πŸ‘‰πŸ» If you're interested in exploring whether your child could benefit from a Neuropsychological Evaluation, CLICK HERE to learn about what we offer at Upshur Bren Psychology Group or SCHEDULE A FREE CALL to learn more about the available resources for your unique needs.

    πŸ“š BoyMom: Reimagining Boyhood in the Age of Impossible Masculinity by Ruth Whippman

    πŸŽ₯ Inside Out and Inside Out 2

    WANT TO LISTEN TO MORE EPISODES ON THIS TOPIC:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do when your child says "I hate myself"

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about learning styles and what the research reveals are the best methods for teaching children with Dan Willingham

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the hidden dangerous and pressures of achievement centered systems with Jennifer Breheny Wallace

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!


    Temperament, personality, and parenting: What you do (and don't) have control over as a parent with Dr. Koraly PΓ©rez-Edgar Sep 17, 2024
    Show notes

    How can you honor who your child is while still equipping them with the tools they need to thrive in our fast-paced world?

    That's exactly what I'm talking about with my guest, McCourtney Professor of Child Studies and Professor of Psychology at Penn State, Dr. Koraly PΓ©rez-Edgar.

    In this episode, we dive into:

    - What temperament actually is from a psychological standpoint (it's probably not what you think it is!) and the factors professionals use to measure and map it out.

    - What impact temperament has on the way sensitive, shy, or explosive children regulate their emotions and respond to their environment.

    - How parents can create opportunities for their child to become self-actualized and why focusing on self-actualization is the precursor to helping them achieve and thrive.

    - Inhibited versus exuberant - how finding the right niche for a child's unique temperament can define their success, even if it doesn't align with traditional expectations.

    - How to find that middle ground between pushing your child when they need a bit of encouragement and nurturing them when they need more support and scaffolding.

    Tune in for valuable insights that will help you navigate the complexities of parenting with more confidence and compassion!

    LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. KORALY PÉREZ-EDGAR:

    https://www.catlabpsu.com/our-team-1

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 How understanding your child's sensory sensitivities can strengthen their emotional intelligence with Alyssa Blask Campbell

    🎧 Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions (SPACE) with Dr. Eli Lebowitz of the Yale Child Study Center

    🎧 Debunking the myth of learning styles with Dr. Dan Willingham


    Q&A: Why are birthday parties so hard for my kid? Sep 12, 2024
    Show notes

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...

    - How there is a lot of weight put on attending all the birthdays your child gets invited to, and hear us share a permission-granting reframe you can tell yourself when you feel that pressure.

    - How to work toward identifying the aspect of birthday parties that are overwhelming for your child - and what the most common triggers are (like transitions, loud sounds, lots of kids) to help you get started.

    - Why it actually makes sense that this is so hard for parents when kids struggle with birthday parties. What social stakes are at play, and how to balance those with what is best for your kid.

    - How to celebrate the birthday boy or girl in a manner that is more realistic for your child, but that allows them to still feel included and fosters their peer relationships.

    - What you can do before the birthday party to help prepare your child for what they can expect and how to navigate their dysregulation if they get overwhelmed once you're there.

    - Two psychologist-mom's recommendations of exactly how to respond (when to nurture them and when to push them) when your child gets clingy at a birthday party.

    WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SIMILAR TOPICS:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about understanding your child's sensory sensitivities with Alyssa Blask Campbell

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your child form strong friendship bonds with Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what you can do when your child experiences peer rejection in elementary school

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!


    Rethinking discipline: How to get through to your sensitive child and teach them lessons that will stick with Dr. Vanessa Lapointe Sep 10, 2024
    Show notes

    I'm joined by Dr. Vanessa Lapointe to discuss effective discipline strategies and how to approach those tough parenting moments with warmth, compassion, and understanding - for yourself and your child.

    In this episode, we dive into:

    - The profound impact of coregulation and why it's a crucial first step we don't want to skip if we want the discipline and lessons we're trying to teach our kids to stick.

    - How to navigate those "bad behavior" moments by rethinking the entire framework of discipline (Spoiler Alert: It starts with a mindset shift to help you understand how there is actually no such thing as "bad" behaviors.)

    - The up-side of having a more sensitive, reactive, or explosive kid - and how to nurture their more sensitive side to bring out their best qualities and help them manage their big emotions so they are more in control of their behaviors.

    - The powerful role of connection in discipline, including how to create a safe space where your child can learn and grow, even in the midst of challenging behaviors.

    - Strategies for parents struggling to keep their cool, working through feelings of guilt or shame, and understanding that it's never too late to implement new parenting approaches.

    If you've ever felt overwhelmed by traditional discipline methods or wondered how to discipline your child in a way that strengthens your bond, this episode is for you!

    LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. VANESSA LAPOINTE:

    https://drvanessalapointe.com/

    READ DR. VANESSA'S BOOKS:

    πŸ“š Discipline Without Damage: How to Get Your Kids to Behave Without Messing Them Up

    πŸ“š Parenting Right From the Start: Laying a Healthy Foundation in the Baby and Toddler Years

    INTERESTED IN LEARNING MORE ABOUT DISCIPLINE?

    Click HERE to download my free guide on effectively disciplining your child with strategies that don't utilize shame or guilt - but still work to get your child to behave!

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Positive parenting isn't permissive parenting: How to integrate effective discipline that prioritizes emotional and mental health with Sarah R. Moore

    🎧 How to move out of power struggles and into cooperation with Jen Lumanlan

    🎧 Busting positive parenting myths to help you authentically foster secure attachment and connection with Raised Good's Tracy Gillett


    Q&A: How can I prepare for an IEP or 504 meeting after my child receives an ADHD diagnosis? Sep 05, 2024
    Show notes

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...

    - Who can assess, evaluate, and diagnose neuropsychological diagnosises like ADHD, dyslexia, autism, etc., and how to go about getting one for your child if you don't have a formal diagnosis yet.

    - The benefits of a comprehensive evaluation, when your child might not need such an in-depth approach, and how to determine which is right for your unique child.

    - Navigating the school support system and what they are required to provide for you and your child after you make a formal request.

    - The basic differences between an Individualized Education Plan (IEP) versus a 504 plan.

    ✨✨✨Want more details?: CLICK HERE to read a blog article that breaks this all down for you.✨✨✨

    - What are soft-building services and how your child's teacher can implement these tools to help your child thrive.

    - It can be helpful for parents to work with an advocate in this process - this can reduce anxiety and to allow you to have a dedicated person with a deep understanding of this process and your child's rights to advocate on their behalf.

    - What to do when the recommendations from your child's evaluation don't correspond with the services your child's school provides - and when to bring in a professional to help translate this jargon for you.

    - Never apologize for advocating for your child! It can help you feel more comfortable and empowered to go into these meetings with action items and knowing what you're asking for.

    - Working to come together to create a collaborative environment with your school system, your child's teachers, and your mental health professional.

    REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

    πŸ‘‰πŸ» If you're interested in exploring more personalized support options, reach out to us at Upshur Bren Psychology Group for a free 15-minute consultation so we can suggest a treatment plan for your unique needs.

    WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SIMILAR TOPICS:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about parenting a child with Autism with Dr. Lynn Kern Koegel

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your child feel comfortable utilizing school supports without feeling self-conscious

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about creating a secure attachment with your neurodiverse child with Dr. Norrine Russell

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!


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