Rich Text

Latest Episodes:

[PREVIEW] Is He Older, Or Is He Just Rich And Noble? Apr 05, 2024

Show notes

Last week, New York Magazine’s The Cut published an all-time banger of a hate read — which is saying something, considering the run they’ve been on recently (from the “$50k in a shoebox” piece to the “tried to leave my husband and then realized I was just having a breakdown” piece). Grazie Sophia Christie’s floridly written and smugly framed essay, “The Case for Marrying an Older Man,” argues, with all the wisdom and certainty earned through 27 years on earth and 4 years of marriage, that leveraging youth and beauty to marry an older man is a cheat code for women, who are otherwise condemned to years of miserable labor alongside insufficient same-age partners. In her case, as she contends, it seems like a lucky jackpot: her husband, a handsome French count just 10 years older than her, is wealthy and came into the relationship mid-career, with a thrice-weekly housecleaner and polished manners. Basically, she’s figured out that marrying a rich man can come with some material benefits.

It’s little wonder this opus, despite its unoriginal thesis, ignited an old-school Twitter discourse cycle. Feminism is in a time of struggle and retrenchment, while women jaded by its failures have begun to succumb to the nostalgic appeal of traditional gender roles. Trad wifery is on the rise. Hot girls are craving a soft life and romanticizing everything. For all its faults, Christie’s essay has its finger firmly on the pulse.

So we decided to talk through what the piece argues explicitly and what it signals implicitly, what feelings it brought up in us, what it signals about the state of women’s progress, and what a feminist movement should offer as an alternative to everyone giving up and trying to marry the richest men we can. And like the original essay, our conversation ended up being far less about age gaps than it was about class, gender politics, and the costs of tying women’s worth to their youth… while they have it. We also referenced a couple fellow Substackers’ thought-provoking responses to the essay: B.D. McClay’s “Here’s the deal” and Kelly Johnson’s “On being a woman in America.” Hope you enjoy! xo

Share Rich Text

If you liked reading this, click the ❤️ button on this post so more people can discover it on Patreon!

Give us feedback or suggest a topic for the pod • Subscribe • Request a free subscription

[PREVIEW] 'Irish Wish' Is An Unsettling Plaid-Drenched Fever Dream Mar 29, 2024

Show notes

One of the first things you notice about “Irish Wish,” the latest output of Lindsay Lohan’s deal with Netflix, is just how… saturated the colors are. The pink accents in her plaid knee-length dress look a little too pink. The green grass of the Irish countryside is a little too green. The blue of the water is a little too blue. Are we in Ireland at all, you start to wonder? Is that real clothing? Are those real human beings? Is this all a simulation? And why in god’s name is Ayesha Curry there?

For the uninitiated, “Irish Wish” stars Lohan as book editor Maddie (you know she’s bookish and romantically awkward because she wears glasses!!!!), who has been harboring a secret crush on her star client, Paul Kennedy (Alexander Vlahos). Well, it’s a secret from her besties, Emma (Elizabeth Tan) and Heather (Ayesha Curry), not from her mom, Jane Seymour, who clearly only agreed to film for one day and did not want to be in the vicinity of the rest of the cast, so she mostly appears on FaceTime. At the red carpet (!!!!), paparazzi-stalked (!!!!) book launch (!!!!) for Paul’s latest novel, he connects with Emma over their shared interest in false lashes, and a few short months later, Maddie is being whisked off to Ireland for their wedding, all the while wishing that she was marrying Paul Kennedy. Luckily, a mystical fairy Catholic saint lady appears and grants Maddie’s wish. Suddenly she’s in an alternate reality, about to get married to a man who would wear a PLAID SUIT TO HIS OWN WEDDING. But there’s also the “cheeky English guy” (Ed Speleers) she met at the airport…. Hijinks ensue!

We needed reinforcements to properly unpack why this movie shook us to our cores and also made us laugh so very much. Luckily, Nora McInerny of She Tried and Terrible, Thanks for Asking was game to talk it all through. Hope you enjoy! Xo

Share Rich Text

If you liked reading this, click the ❤️ button on this post so more people can discover it on Patreon!

Give us feedback or suggest a topic for the pod • Subscribe • Request a free subscription

[PREVIEW] The Allure Of KateGate And Royal Conspiracies Mar 22, 2024

Show notes

UPDATE: On the afternoon of March 22, Princess Catherine announced that she is undergoing treatment for cancer. Our thoughts are with her and her family, and we wish her a swift recovery. This discussion primarily focuses on what the public reactions to her stepping back from public life say about the culture / the role of the royal family.

Nearly three months after the last official appearance of Catherine, the Princess of Wales, and following approximately 17 waves of fevered speculation about the cause of her unusually long absence from the public eye, we decided it was time to dedicate an episode to KateGate. Where is Kate? Why has the U.K.’s future queen and preeminent momfluencer — a woman who thrice appeared for photos in heels, a blowout and full makeup mere hours after giving birth — disappeared from view for months at a time? And what does it mean that so many of the public, including American non-royal-watchers like ourselves, have gotten swept into the furor of conspiracy theorizing that has filled the void of her reliable presence?

Sara Petersen of In Pursuit of Clean Countertops joined us to recap the timeline of events since this PR mess first began brewing, to discuss a few of the major theories behind her absence, and — most importantly — to unpack the seductiveness of this particular path down the rabbit hole.

We examine Kate’s role as a momfluencer and a stalwart of the royal family, both of which center around being continuously available for public viewing. We also get into the shaky reputation of the English royal family at this historical moment, and how the well-documented horrific experiences of Princess Diana and Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex, with marrying into the royal family have shaped our expectations for what scandals must be brewing behind the scenes. And we consider how this particular conspiracy has thrived in a post-truth media climate, in which AI-generated and Photoshopped images make it difficult to trust any visual evidence — and how this plays into our own anxieties about our fundamental replaceability. We hope you enjoy! xo

Some references & further reading:

Ellie Hall’s thorough timeline and analysis: “It’s getting weirder: BuzzFeed News’ former royals reporter on Kate Middleton, Palace PR, and distrust in the media”

Sara Petersen’s “Kate as the ultimate momfluencer” essay

Charlie Warzel’s analysis of how Kate Middleton conspiracy theories are thriving in a post-truth, AI-fueled media landscape: “Kate Middleton and the End of Shared Reality”

Elizabeth Holmes’s measured Substack coverage of Kate’s health situation and the swirl of conspiracy theories in response to it

Fran Hoepfner’s takedown of the Kate-as-imaginary-revolutionary theories: “Wherever She Is, Kate Middleton Isn’t on Our Side”

Anna Russell’s New Yorker essay on the cultural forces at play in the explosion of conspiracy theories: “The Kate Middleton Conspiracy-Theory Swirl”

Kathryn VanArendonk’s look at the many failures of Kensington Palace’s press team: “The Royals Are So Bad at This”

Madison Malone Kircher’s NYT interview with Heidi Agan, a professional Kate Middleton impersonator who has gone on the record to deny being the woman seen at the Windsor Farm Shop: “This Is Not Princess Catherine”

Share Rich Text

If you liked reading this, click the ❤️ button on this post so more people can discover it on Patreon!

Give us feedback or suggest a topic for the pod • Subscribe • Request a free subscription

[PREVIEW] 'Love Is Blind' 6 Reunion + 'The Traitors' Finale Mar 15, 2024

Show notes

It only took six seasons of “Love Is Blind” for Netflix and Kinetic to get Nick and Vanessa Lachey some real media training. At long last, our fair hosts seem to have discovered the power of a follow-up question! (They did seem to basically forget to ask about the majority of Jimmy and Chelsea’s relationship, but… baby steps.)

This year’s reunion had some real production value behind it, was (blessedly) not live, and the Lacheys held some cast members’ feet to the fire — namely Jeramey, Sarah Ann and Trevor. Guess there’s a first time for everything! We also got some (incomplete) clarity on where the broken-up couples stand with each other today, who has regrets, and who did a very campy JCPenney portrait shoot (Amy and Johnny, obvi).

We would have liked to see more from Chelsea and Jimmy, specifically space for Chelsea to reflect on what she may have learned not to do in a relationship from this experience, but all in all, it was a pretty solid reunion episode.

We also did a little (by little we mean more than 40-minute-long) check-in about the conclusion of “The Traitors” season 2. (Skip to 1:32:55 if you just want the “Traitors” discussion!)

We got into Pilot Pete’s fall, the gameplay of our last two traitors, the rom-com-ish final moments of the season, and all the people still holding grudges. (We see you, MJ and Phaedra!) Hope you enjoy! Xo

Share Rich Text

If you liked reading this, click the ❤️ button on this post so more people can discover it on Patreon!

Give us feedback or suggest a topic for the pod • Subscribe • Request a free subscription

[PREVIEW] 'Love Is Blind' 6 Finale: A Family Affair To Remember Mar 07, 2024

Show notes

SPOILER ALERT: This post contains some spoilers for the finale of season 6 of “Love Is Blind.”

The Charlotte-based “Love Is Blind” season that started out so promisingly is looking pretty diminished by the finale — at least when you’re counting couples. Season 6 ended up being as short on weddings as season 5, and similarly gave us more mess than romance.

But the finale was no less rich of an episode because of the smaller number of weddings, opening with a scorched-earth fight between Chelsea and Jimmy and reaching a crescendo with a wedding that was more about the riveting intergenerational drama of Clay’s family than it was about the couple. In this pod, we examine almost every frame of the Chelsea/Jimmy throwdown and each conversation Clay and his mother have with and about Clay’s father. Also, Amy and Johnny’s wedding, which is more of a palate cleanser than part of the action. Hope you enjoy! xo

Share Rich Text

If you liked reading this, click the ❤️ button on this post so more people can discover it on Patreon!

Give us feedback or suggest a topic for the pod • Subscribe • Request a free subscription

[PREVIEW] 'Love Is Blind' 6, E10-11: On And Off-Screen Meltdowns Feb 29, 2024

Show notes

Just when we thought things had reached peak insanity on season 6 of “Love Is Blind,” receipts pointing to some questionable off-screen behavior of cast members started popping up all over TikTok.

Full disclosure! We taped our recap of episodes 10 and 11 last week, but then the gossip started pouring out: about Jeramey’s previous engagement, about the serious girlfriend Trevor allegedly had DURING FILMING, about the cast of “Perfect Match” 2, about what really went down between Laura and Jeramey during filming… and we knew that we simply had to hop back on and address it all. So bear with us this week — up top we get into all of the news and rumors that been floating around, and then we get into the meat of this week’s drop.

After watching episodes 10 and 11, we continue to be #TeamLaura, we continue to be deeply concerned about Jimmy and Chelsea’s toxicity (though we did love this sweet IG post and Chelsea’s comment on it), we continue to root for Johnny and Amy, and we continue to feel many mixed emotions about AD and Clay because AD deserves the absolute world and is the undisputed heroine of this season.

But honestly? Mostly we really just feel bad for Jeramey’s mom. Being the mother of grown son fuckboys sounds tough. Hope you enjoy! Xo

Share Rich Text

If you liked reading this, click the ❤️ button on this post so more people can discover it on Patreon!

Give us feedback or suggest a topic for the pod • Subscribe • Request a free subscription

[PREVIEW] "Love Is Blind" 6 E7-9: The Honeymoon Is Over Feb 22, 2024

Show notes

On this week’s pod, we recap episodes 7-9 of “Love Is Blind” season 6, which has begun to take some unexpected twists after a strong opening. Though the first drop of “Love Is Blind” episodes ended in a grim place, with at least two of the five engaged pairs collapsing into conflict within hours of attending their first social function together, their honeymoon in Punta Cana ends with all five couples officially intact. But things are looking precarious as we push past the season’s midpoint this week. By the end of episode 9, a couple has called the whole thing off (and not the couple we expected last week), and almost all of them seem to be on unsteady ground.

Back in Charlotte, the couples begin to examine each other’s homes (Jeramey’s is so far on the sterile side of pristine that it even spooks neat freak Laura) and meet each other’s friends and families. The couples try to coordinate their schedules now that they’re back at work — in Clay’s case, now that he’s back to having a job and a handful of businesses. Johnny and Amy consider getting him a vasectomy for a couple years so they can have anxiety-free sex. Chelsea is rapidly devoured by her insecurities, while Jimmy struggles to become more effusive toward her quickly enough to save their relationship. Jeramey and Laura spend their time with her family showing off their romantic dynamic of tensely needling each other under the guise of banter. Kenneth is joyously reunited with his phone.

In short, a lot of things go wrong in a short amount of time — though we’re still hoping our angels Johnny and Amy figure out that vasectomies are not something you’re supposed to plan to reverse. In this episode, we try to litigate some of these big conflicts; wrap our heads around the most abrupt, low-key breakups in “Love Is Blind” history; and revisit our enemies-to-friends list. Hope you enjoy! xo

Share Rich Text

If you liked reading this, click the ❤️ button on this post so more people can discover it on Patreon!

Give us feedback or suggest a topic for the pod • Subscribe • Request a free subscription

[PREVIEW] 'Love Is Blind' 6 Could Make Us Forget Season 5 Feb 15, 2024

Show notes

Season 6 of Netflix’s “Love Is Blind” dropped its first six episodes on Valentine’s Day, and (obviously) we binged them all. The verdict? So far, so good.

After an absolutely disastrous season 5, which left multiple lawsuits in its wake, and two couples fully erased from the season, we were wary heading into season 6. But six episodes in, LIB’s Charlotte, North Carolina season is off to a strong start. We spend significantly more time in the pods this season, which lets us really get to know our main players. After 10 days in the pods, FIVE couples get engaged and are subsequently shipped off to the Dominican Republic to figure out if they hate each other IRL or not.

In this first drop of episodes, some themes begin to emerge. There is a distinct ~trad-vibe~ to this season — almost all of the couples seem to highly prize traditional gender roles. (Johnny and Amy seem to be our singular exception.) They talk about their desire to “submit” and “lead,” and they invoke biblical language like “lust” and “lay together.” The women all perform extreme femininity in the pods, while the men look like they just rolled out of bed to mosy on down to the golf course. And one woman, Sarah Ann, gets into her thoughts on abortion: “If two people lay down consensually and have sex, you should take responsibility for your actions,” she says, as if human children should be wielded as punishments. “The option should definitely be there, but I don’t think it should be used as a form of birth control.” (America!)

All this is to say… there’s a lot to unpack. In this week’s Rich Text pod, we dive in head first. We discuss how we think these couples will fare in the real world, the sweet and supportive friendship moments we saw in the pods, and how men will literally go on reality television instead of going to therapy. Hope you enjoy! Xo

Share Rich Text

If you liked reading this, click the ❤️ button on this post so more people can discover it on Patreon!

Give us feedback or suggest a topic for the pod • Subscribe • Request a free subscription

[PREVIEW] 'The Traitors' Is A Dressed-Up Game Of Mafia Feb 05, 2024

Show notes

Ever since one-time Bachelor — and famed “Kissing Bandit” — Arie Luyendyk, Jr. appeared on the first season of the Peacock reality series “The Traitors,” the show has been on our radar. We heard about it on social media and from friends; we heard that Arie showed a different side of himself in the strategy competition setting, and that the show itself was wildly entertaining.

Nevertheless, we resisted.

We are not competition reality fans, but relationship reality fans. We watch dating shows by the bushel and dabble in narrative shows rooted in the power struggles within friend groups. “The Traitors,” a classic competition game show, was uninspiring to our romantic souls.

This season, another former Bachelor, Pete Weber (aka Pilot Pete), joined the cast, but we stood strong. For about five episodes, at which point our friend informed us that Pete was in the midst of executing a dazzling strategic gambit. Now this, we had to see.

So this week on the pod, we discuss the first six episodes of season two of “The Traitors.” Hosted by Alan Cumming and his Scottish sparklecore wardrobe — a seemingly endless array of kilts in bold colors, structural sleeves, and rhinestone-studded ensembles — “The Traitors” takes 22 reality show contestants, athletes, and a former member of the English Parliament, and throws them into a gussied-up game of Mafia. Every day, they awake in their rambling Scottish castle to find that the small group of Traitors chosen from within their ranks have killed one of the Faithful overnight. Then they work together to complete a convoluted challenge in order to win money for the prize pot. The day ends with a round table deliberation to choose one player to banish — the goal, of course, being to banish all the Traitors.

It’s an ornately produced show in many ways: the sets, Cumming’s costumes, the prop-heavy challenges (in one they have to build and fire a giant catapult). In others, it’s stripped down. Murders are almost always done simply through the sending of an anonymous letter — there’s no trail of evidence for the Faithful to use to find the perpetrators. Instead, they have to rely on vibes. This tends to highlight people’s biases and vulnerabilities, their preconceptions about what normal behavior is, and how gender roles manifest in the game.

We discuss all this, along with Pete’s bold strategic move, the gameplay of the Traitors thus far, and the divide between gamers and relationship show veterans within the castle. Hope you enjoy! xo

Share Rich Text

If you liked reading this, click the ❤️ button on this post so more people can discover it on Patreon!

Give us feedback or suggest a topic for the pod • Subscribe • Request a free subscription

[PREVIEW] The Art Of The Blowjob Jan 29, 2024

Show notes

“What is the penis to me? What is its nature?” Jacqueline Novak asks early in her show, “Get On Your Knees.” After some consideration she concludes that the penis is tender, responsive, and has “the soul of an artist.”

Like the organ it explores, “Get On Your Knees” has a tenderness at its center, wrapped in a package of genital humor.

It is a show that exists in the liminal space between comedy special, one-woman play, and long-form essay. It’s brilliant. It’s hilarious. And it’s about… the blowjob. What started as the germ of an idea in the form of a piece she wrote for a creative writing course as a student at Georgetown University in the early aughts ultimately became a 2019 New York Times Critic’s Pick, a 2020 Drama Desk Award nominee, and now, a 2024 Netflix special.

After watching about 10 minutes of the 90-minute Netflix special, which dropped Jan. 23, will surprise no one to learn that Novak studied creative writing in college, in addition to doing improv alongside a young John Mulaney. She has a self-described “poetic” sensibility, and “Get On Your Knees” (GOYK) actually grew out of a piece of nonfiction creative writing she had done years prior.

Natasha Lyonne, who directed the TV special, wasn’t exaggerating when she told the LA Times that she believed GOYK was “a framework for an explosion of genius.”

In this episode, we not only dig into some of the big themes of Novak’s special — and why it hits so perfectly for two anxious, wordy women like ourselves. We also revisit our own storied histories with the blowjob. What kind of blowjob-related folklore did we receive from other girls? Were we as motivated as Novak says she was as a teen to learn the craft?

We talk about it all. Hope you enjoy! Xo

Share Rich Text

If you liked reading this, click the ❤️ button on this post so more people can discover it on Patreon!

Give us feedback or suggest a topic for the pod • Subscribe • Request a free subscription

Our TOPPODCAST Picks

Follow Us

Stay Connected

Some references & further reading:

Related Podcasts

Links

Stay Connected