Recovery Elevator

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**Recovery Elevator**

It’s not a NO to alcohol — it’s a YES to a better life!
Bestselling author Paul Churchill interviews people who have successfully quit drinking, offering an honest, uplifting look at what an alcohol-free life can really look like. Each week, Recovery Elevator explores sobriety from fresh perspectives — no judgment, no lectures, just real stories from real people.
Whether you’re sober curious, newly sober, supporting a loved one, or already thriving in recovery, you’ve found your community.

Topics include: how to stop drinking alcohol, alcohol addiction and dependency, whether moderate drinking actually works, what happens to your brain when you quit drinking, the role of spirituality in recovery, whether AA is right for you, tracking sobriety milestones, and whether addiction might be trying to tell you something.

If alcohol is making you sick and tired, Recovery Elevator is your invitation to explore what life on the other side looks like — through candid conversations and inspiring guest stories.

Latest Episodes:

RE 448: How Do I Let Go and Stop Trying to Control Sep 18, 2023

Show notes

Today we have Jen. She is 48 from Boulder, CO and took her last drink on May 12th, 2021.

Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.

[02:48] Highlights from Kris:

Today's question comes from Dale in Virginia. He wants to know "how do I learn to let go of things, and stop trying to control?"

Kris feels that two themes that come up over and over in recovery are surrender and acceptance. He says there are different types of control and while some of it is normal and can be healthy, trying to control things such as other people and how they feel about us is not healthy.

Kris shares his insights about this topic and shares with us: "when I have unrest on the inside, it presents itself on the outside. When I find that inner peace, I can extend it to the world around me".

[11:50]: Kris welcomes Jen:

Jen joins us from Boulder, CO area and recently celebrated two years alcohol free. She is married and they have two kids and a dog. For fun Jen likes to be active outdoors and spending time with recovery friends nearby, fabric arts and yoga.

Jen didn't drink when she was young because she learned that some family members quit drinking because they couldn't control it. She drank very casually because she didn't want to develop a problem, but over time peer pressure found her drinking more frequently. In grad school there was more binge drinking and hangovers. She and her husband drank only socially prior to having kids.

Jen went back to work shortly after having her first child and realized that she was missing out on a lot, so she became a stay-at-home mom. She bought boxed wine to try and save money and discovered it was too easy to refill the glass. Jen wanted to be a fun mom and used alcohol to feel less bored. Over time Jen started finding herself drinking after everyone went to bed.

After a situation that found both her husband and children concerned about her, Jen started to try quitting drinking. She had already been reading quit lit and listening to podcasts. She was able to make it over 100 days but decided to attempt moderation. She found that after a while the attempts to control how much she drank became frustrating. One day while listening to a podcast episode, she had a moment of clarity where she knew she had to quit drinking for good.

Jen feels that her husband quitting drinking shined a light on her drinking. She would make excuses to have drinks outside of the home.

Jen quit drinking the day after her birthday. She decided to join Café RE and started going on hikes with fellow RE members, hosting chats and giving back to the community. Jen finds "playing the tape forward" very helpful in addition to listening to herself and discovering what she needs. She enjoys reading self-help books instead of quit lit. Finding connections with other people and creating deep friendships was an unexpected perk Jen received in recovery.

Jen's plan for recovery moving forward: working on her spiritual and self-discovery practice.

Jen's parting piece of guidance: "play it forward" it is one tool that has never wavered for her. Keep your mind open and try a variety of things for your recovery.

[01:03:47] Kris' outro:

Kris shares a story about a recent vacation with his family and how it relates to his expectations and control.

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Go big, because eventually we'll all go home.

I love you guys.

RE 447: Can You Be Addicted to Alcohol and Not Be An Alcoholic? Sep 11, 2023

Show notes

Today we have Stephanie. She is 35 from and took her last drink on December 31st, 2022

Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.

[02:43] Highlights from Paul:

Paul and Kris are going to be doing a ten-part intro series where we answer questions from listeners. If you have a question that you'd like us to answer on the air, send them to info@recoveryelevator.com.

Paul shares one of his biggest regrets since starting the podcast and also answers the first question from Brady in South Denver. He asked, "can you be addicted to alcohol and not be an alcoholic?"

Paul begins his answer with "The Answer is yes. And no. And a little bit of yes, and little bit of No. Welcome to a world full of paradoxes."

Next week we will hear Kris answer the next question: "How do I learn to let go of things and stop trying to control?".

[09:23]: Paul introduces Stephanie:

Stephanie is 35 and she is from Connecticut, currently living in Washington State. She works as an accountant and as a server at a restaurant. She has one son and a dog. Stephanie enjoys reading both for fun and for a podcast she has: So, What Are You Reading?, and she has recently picked up paddleboarding.

Stephanie had her first drink when she was 16 and had a bad experience and said she wasn't going to do it again. She drank very sporadically until she moved to Washington with her son's father. After they broke up, she moved into an apartment on her own and felt like alcohol was her only friend. She progressed from wine to harder alcohol over time and began to try and put parameters on her drinking.

After a while, Stephanie realized that drinking wasn't what she was supposed to be doing. She started recognizing that she wasn't present for her son. Her anxiety was terrible, and she had issues with remembering things from the night before which made it worse. But Stephanie says she enjoyed the chaos that came with the drinking escapades, even though it was making her life harder than it needed to be. She got to the point that she didn't want to do anything.

When Stephanie's current boyfriend did a Dry January in 2021, Stephanie joined him but says she white knuckled through it and drank as soon as February 1st came. That was when she started questioning what the point of drinking was. She had some very negative events in her last year of drinking to the point that on January 1st, 2023, she decided enough was enough.

During the first 30 days she binged on podcasts and YouTube videos. She started journalling, doing puzzles and playing board games with her son. Stephanie has been able to get into grad school, is able to plan vacations and try a lot of new things. Reading, exercise, and time outdoors have become very important to Stephanie.

Stephanie's favorite resources: The Sober Café (Facebook group), Recovery Elevator and other recovery podcasts,

Stephanie's parting piece of guidance: if alcohol is impacting you in a negative way just take it out for 100 days.

[49:27] Closing thoughts:

If you're not ready to quit drinking, none of the information we covered today is going to land, if you are ready, it doesn't matter what we cover. Focus on the similarities and not the differences.

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I love you guys.

All is fine, and all will be well.

RE 446: Go Easy on Yourself Sep 04, 2023

Show notes

Today we have Jonathan. He is 44 from Grand Forks, ND and took his last drink on May 17th, 2008.

Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.

[02:24] Highlights from Paul:

Straying from the sometimes-complex intros, Paul urges us to go easy on ourselves.

Despite all of our agricultural, scientific, and technological innovations, this is the hardest time it has ever been to be a human being. Rates of addiction and overdoses are soaring. Dr. Gabor Mate's book The Myth of Normal shows how our out of balance culture is creating mountains of unrest and disease.

Life is already a challenge and living in the modern world without substances to slow down the prefrontal cortex, it is even harder.

Go easy on yourself. Life is going to kick your ass at some time or another. Don't let that Bruno voice in the head make it any worse. Once that voice starts chirping about how you should have done XYZ differently, and how you're doomed for eternity, locate the true you and tell that Bruno voice to step aside, and you'll take it from here.

Be sure to start your day with words of compassion. Compassion for you, those nearest to you, the animals outside your window, and for those who are still struggling with alcohol.

[8:11]: Kris introduces Jonathan:

Jonathan is 44 years old and lives in Grand Forks, ND. He has worked in the restaurant industry most of his life and is also the managing director for the office of Recovery Reinvented. For fun Jonathan likes to spend time outside and cook. He is married and they have three daughters.

Jonathan says he had a good childhood with a lot of parental support. He feels like his exposure to alcohol as a teenager was normal. He says drinking never got in the way of his grades or playing sports. While in college Jonathan started working in bars and restaurants where drinking is part of the culture. His drinking increased and he ended up dropping out of school.

Jonathan realized early on that his drinking looked different from his peers. He witnessed others being able to stop with a few drinks after work whereas he would just go to the next bar or go home and keep the party going. He didn't think he was drinking to mask anything, so he didn't have a problem, he just really enjoyed drinking.

While Jonathan was doing well in his career, his drinking increased. He opened his first restaurant when he was 27 and was very successful. People were starting to tell Jonathan that he should cut back but he struggled to do so.

Jonathan had a meeting with his business partner and his father where he was told that things needed to change, or the partnership was going to end. This is what it took for Jonathan to seek treatment. He went to inpatient treatment for 30 days. While there he went from feeling like this was a temporary change to realizing that he needed it to be long term. He started seeing the similarities with others instead of the differences.

Jonathan completed 30 days and continued with outpatient treatment. He made the decision to be transparent with his recovery. He feels that helped him stay accountable and sober.

Jonathan's favorite resource in recovery: I Am Sober app (he likes seeing how much money he has saved).

Jonathan's parting piece of guidance: "Everything that is good in my life today is in my life because alcohol is not."

Recovery Reinvented

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We took the elevator down, we have to take the stairs back up

You can do this.

I love you guys.

RE 445: Keep on Dancing Aug 28, 2023

Show notes

Today we have Cindy. She is 54 from Kure Beach, NC and took her last drink on March 2nd, 2023.

Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.

[03:23] Highlights from Paul:

After recently watching a social media video featuring a sober influencer dancing, Paul decided to challenge this individual to a breakdancing battle. Meanwhile another sober influencer viewing this video stated that watching this video made him want to drink.

Let's zoom out for a second.

The Tik Tok user, with millions of followers, said that watching videos of this person dancing - made them want to drink. To summarize that in two words it would be: Stop Dancing.

Then we have Paul who challenges this person to a sober break dance battle. We can summarize this statement in two words: Keep dancing.

So, listeners, keep on dancing, and never stop. If you don't know your metaphorical or literal dance steps, stick around. The knowledge will return. If someone tells you that your dancing makes them want to drink, then that is 100% their problem. When you dance, it gives others permission to dance. You don't need alcohol, it won't make you better, and you'll remember all of it.

[08:52] Paul introduces Cindy:

Cindy is 54, grew up in Maryland but currently lives in North Carolina. She has been married for 23 years and they have two children and a dog. She works as an operating room nurse and recently got a master's degree.

Cindy recalls first having alcohol late in high school. She was very social throughout college and enjoyed drinking a lot. She traveled a lot after college and knows that she drank but didn't have any major consequences. Cindy says she and her husband drank but she doesn't recall it affecting her life much. Happy Hour after work was very common for her due to the stressful job she has. Even after an incident where she was able to get out of a DUI, she still didn't recognize that she had a problem. The drinking increased but Cindy always thought it was her husband that had the problem, not her. There were no attempts to moderate and no consequences, so the drinking continued.

Cindy started wondering why she wasn't happy because she had a good life. Since she felt it was her husband that had the issue, Cindy started attending Al-Anon. When she returned from a travel nursing job, she realized how terrible she was feeling. She had been drinking every night, driving drunk often, and started having some consequences. Soon she found herself in an AA meeting where she had what she considers an awakening of sorts. She felt like she had found people that understood her.

Earlier this year, a podcast episode Cindy was listening spoke of living an authentic life. This really resonated with her, and she realized alcohol had to go. She started attending AA regularly after her last drink and is learning to deal with her feelings and learning from them. Cindy utilizes many tools to process how she feels and knows that alcohol is not the answer.

Cindy's favorite resources in recovery: recovery podcasts, being active in AA

Cindy's parting piece of guidance: If you are contemplating stopping drinking, think about why you are drinking.

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I love you guys.

Go big, keep dancing, because eventually we'll all go home.

RE 444: Alcohol Consumption by State Aug 21, 2023

Show notes

Today we have Chad. He is 51 from Southern Indiana and took his last drink on March 25th, 2022.

Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.

Follow Recovery Elevator on Instagram! We're starting to put more video content on the platform so check it out.

[02:47] Highlights from Paul:

Something heard often while interviewing guests is "you don't know what it's like to grow up in Wisconsin, Texas, in Las Vegas, in Trenton, New Jersey, or you don't know how much we drink in…" fill in the blank. So yes, it is ubiquitous, but there is a front runner.

Check out the full list and see where your state ranks: Alcohol Consumption by State

In 2012 British researcher Dr. David Nutt was tasked by the government to put harm scores on 20 of the world's most harmful drug. Alcohol came in at #1 beating out crack, heroin, meth and cocaine.

Paul shares some stats about the costs of alcohol use disorder in Montana. You can see stats for all of the US here: Alcohol Abuse Statistics

Better Help: www.betterhelp.com/elevator - 10% off your first month. #sponsored

[11:48] Kris introduces Chad:

Chad has been sober for a little over 15 months at the time of this recording. He is 51 and lives in a small town in Indiana. Chad is married, and they have three children. He works for the government. He enjoys talking recovery, umpiring softball, and cycling.

Chad's parents divorced when he was young. He never felt like he fit in at either of his parents' homes and was a people pleaser doing whatever he could to fit in. Chad moved in with his dad when he was 13. After an ankle injury he was sidelined from sports, and he ended up finding a new group of friends that dabbled in drugs and alcohol. He says he struggled through high school and was looking at the military instead of going to college. He was looking forward to having some structure that he didn't feel he had growing up between two households.

After graduating, Chad spent the summer partying and started basic training in August. He was sent to Germany after more training, and they drank a lot there. He started to notice that he needed to drink just to feel normal. He ended up leaving after one deployment and realized the military wasn't for him.

Chad left the military and went into construction work. He and his wife hadn't married yet, but she was pregnant, which was frowned upon by her family. Four years after having their daughter they got married and while they got a house together and continued to grow the family, Chad drank to deal with his stressors. It got to the point where Chad couldn't do anything without a drink in his hand. He says drinking took a front seat to everything else. On days when he could not drink, he was starting to have symptoms of withdrawal. He began to hide alcohol and his tolerance grew.

After a bad blackout and confrontation with his wife, he felt terrible and realized that he needed help. His wife encouraged him to seek inpatient treatment which is what Chad was hoping for. With his wife's support he found a rehab that helped him a lot. He was able to talk to therapists and realize that he wasn't alone. After 30 days in rehab, Chad started AA, started reading more books about recovery and has found Zoom meetings and listening to the RE podcast very helpful.

Chad's plan for recovery moving forward: Dig deeper into his recovery and be of service.

Chad's parting piece of guidance: A life worth living can be found in sobriety. You're worth it, give yourself a chance. "No" is a full answer.

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We're the only ones that can do this RE, but we don't have to do it alone.

I love you guys.

RE 443: A Different Type of Alcoholic Aug 14, 2023

Show notes

Today we have Kelly, she is 46 from Minneapolis, MN and took her last drink on June 18th, 2023.

Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.

[02:57] Highlights from Paul:

When saying the word "alcoholic", these images, and thoughts commonly come to mind:

Living under a Bridge. Brown paper bag. Homeless. Hopeless. Unemployed.

Some of this is accurate but studies show only 5% of alcoholics fit these descriptions.

The other 95% are high functioning, tend to be high earners, more educated, are healthier and have more stable relationships than average.

With the estimated 452 million alcoholics that don't fit the stereotypical description of an alcoholic, this takes the saying you are not alone to a new level.

We justify or benchmark our drinking according to what an alcoholic looks like. I'm not that bad, I have a job, and money in the bank. We surround ourselves with other drinkers who don't fit the alcoholic stereotype to solidify our own positions on the addiction scale. Now a classic trait of an addiction is that we are blind to where we actually are with the addiction process. The hole you find yourself in is probably deeper than you think. My recommendation is to stop digging. You CAN put the shovel down. Another classic trait of an addiction is the progression. We have 452 million alcoholics on the globe who are not living under a bridge or drinking out of brown paper bag yet.

[09:30] Paul introduces Kelly:

Kelly took her last drink on June 18th, 2023, and has 6 days at the time of this recording. She is 46 and lives in Minneapolis. She leads software development teams for a living. Kelly loves the outdoors and enjoys running, hiking, and paddleboarding. She enjoys movies, music, and museums as well.

Kelly first tried alcohol at a party in 9th grade. Drinking was not something that she wanted to do but she succumbed to peer pressure. A year later she started spending time visiting her brother at college, and she enjoyed hanging out with him and his friends and started drinking more frequently. It was a good escape from the abuse she was dealing with at home.

In college Kelly was drinking and dealing with an eating disorder. She worked hard to overcome her bulimia but then her drinking ramped up after that. After college she married a fellow engineer, and they would drink heavily together. After they started having children and settling down, her husband was able to quit the excessive drinking, but Kelly was not.

While raising her children, Kelly was able to cut back on drinking and started putting rules around it. Her relationship wasn't going well, and Kelly was going out more frequently and drinking almost daily. After a few drinking and driving charges, Kelly began to realize that she could no longer control it. Over time she recognized that she was starting to isolate more and then would go out to bars to find connection with other people.

Kelly has been able to have more gaps in drinking days over time and has been acquiring tools throughout the process. She is recognizing that she needs to treat her sobriety like a baby and nurture it daily. Each morning she meditates and uses the Reframe app. She attends AA meetings frequently and has recently found a therapist to help her with her childhood trauma.

Kelly's plan for recovery moving forward: keep doing things that make her feel uncomfortable, attending more meetings, and new meditation practices.

Kelly's parting piece of guidance: keep trying, be open to new resources.

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Go big, because eventually we'll all go home.

I love you guys.

RE 442: Time to Breathe Aug 07, 2023

Show notes

Today we have Jeff, he is 35 from Salt Lake City, UT and had his last drink on April 6th, 2023.

Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.

[03:46] Highlights from Kris:

Kris finds sober anniversaries a good opportunity to reflect on where he was and where he is today. He asks himself questions such as "What have I gone through? How have I been able to meet the challenges placed in front of me? Am I moving in the direction I want to in my life?"

In active addiction Kris was not able to show love to himself. He knew that the things he was doing were hurting other people and himself. He knew his wife, kids, parents, and friends all loved him, but he couldn't let the love in. He was stuck in the loop of "I'm not enough, I've screwed up too much, I deserve to feel this way."

If you're listening, and you're there today, know that you are not alone. Many of us have been there and know how hard it is.

We don't have to be perfect RE… that's never going to happen. All we have to be is willing. We have to be willing to be honest with where we are today. Without judgement, where are things in our life right now? What is the next right thing to step into our new future? Where can we find support? Don't worry about trying to resolve every issue in your life all at once. Just take little bites.

[09:40] Kris introduces Jeff:

At the time of recording, Jeff is celebrating 90 days of sobriety and plans to celebrate with cacao. He is 35 and lives in Salt Lake City with his wife and two dogs. For fun Jeff enjoys mountain biking, skiing, running, and music is a big part of his life.

Growing up, alcohol was always present at celebrations hosted by his parents and their friends. It was normal for him to see people drink to excess. Jeff's first drink was when he was 16 with some friends and stolen rum. Early on he recognized that his drinking was different than other people's. On the outside, he was successful at school but was suffering from depression that alcohol helped him escape from.

After high school Jeff went to the east coast to play hockey for two years. This required a lot of discipline, so Jeff's drinking was limited to one day each week. He never moderated and usually ended up blacking out.

When Jeff turned 20, he started college where he played hockey and studied engineering. During his freshman year he got a bad concussion and struggled a lot with the side effects afterwards. He initially used drinking to self-medicate the side effects but drinking started to become the answer to everything.

After college Jeff moved back to Alaska for a job. He had his own place with two roommates who he frequently drank with late into the night. He was able to keep up with work and other activities so in spite of some health consequences, he didn't feel he had a problem.

Jeff started questioning his drinking after he caught himself drinking and driving frequently. He found Allen Carr's book and was able to stop drinking for 11 days. Since then, he has been in the cycle of quitting and then starting back with different lengths of time between drinks.

Therapy has been helpful for Jeff over the last three years and his wife has been very supportive. Connection has become very important to him.

Jeff's plan in recovery moving forward: moving forward with integrity and owning who he is.

Jeff's parting piece(s) of guidance: it's ok if you think this is hard because it is hard. Even just listening to this podcast is a huge win. Recovery is not a straight line.

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You're the only one that can do this, but you don't have to do it alone.

I love you guys.

RE 441: Connection With a Molecule Jul 31, 2023

Show notes

Today we have Shane, he is 39 from Birmingham, AL and took his last drink on December 25th, 2021.

Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.

[00:58] Highlights from Paul:

Many of us share the same response to our first drink. It's a firework show internally that connects the missing dots. We finally feel connected. Alcohol becomes our best friend.

Now do not beat yourself up if you find yourself in a tightly intertwined relationship with alcohol. Humans are pack animals and need connection to survive. We need partnership. As addiction guru Dr. Gabor Mate would say, congratulations, you found alcohol, you found a way to survive. Yes, there is the disease model, but there's also the unease model. A deep unrest or lack of connection with others and ourselves.

How do we fix this? Like we learned in last week's episode, it's robust social connections that fix this. Some of us have difficulty making deep connections with other human beings but connection with nonhuman souls can help us quit drinking too. Animals help us release oxytocin and serotonin; they help our nervous systems relax. Studies show plants and trees can do the same thing.

To summarize, we connected with a molecule. Which ended up being the most dangerous and addictive molecule thus far recorded, and there is plenty of data to back that up. So, what's next? Start building connections with other people, places, and things, like your life depends on it. Because it does.

[08:12] Paul introduces Shane:

Shane is 39 years old, currently lives outside of Birmingham, AL. He is married with two children. He works in the heavy truck parts industry. He has been playing guitar since he was 15.

Shane had no interest in drinking prior to trying it on a beach trip with friends when he was 20. Shane was surround by alcohol while working as a musician and in the service industry. He found that alcohol made it easier for him to talk to and socialize with people. He first recognized that he might have a problem when he realized he was starting to rely on alcohol to alleviate any stress he was having. He met his wife while they were working on a music album together.

Shane started having increasing anxiety and his drinking issues were becoming more apparent to those around him. He was given an ultimatum by his wife to quit drinking. He was able to quit drinking for about five years.

Shane's father passed away and he ended up taking over the business abruptly. At this point he had already relapsed and would have a series of stops and starts utilizing different programs, but nothing ever stuck. Shortly after his daughter was born Shane made his most recent attempt at recovery after some conversations with his wife. He started attending AA three times a week and this was the first time that he admitted to himself that he could not control this. Shane says he felt huge relief when he realized that.

Shane says that within the first six months of sobriety his sleep improved, he was able to do more by not planning his life around alcohol. Exercise has been very helpful to Shane as well. He is open with friends and family around his recovery and has no issues being around alcohol. Shane feels the next step for him is leaning into the service aspect of recovery.

Shane's favorite resources in recovery: RE podcast, AA, SMART Recovery

Shane's parting piece of guidance: "just stop drinking"

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It all starts from the inside out.

I love you guys.

RE 440: How to Undo Trauma Jul 24, 2023

Show notes

Today we have Kathy. She is 31 from Dillworth, MN and has been clean since June 13th, 2016.

Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.

[02:06] Highlights from Paul:

Before we get started, how is your summer going? How is sobriety going? How is your AF clock going? How is your life going? Regardless of your answer to all those questions, Paul reminds us that we are not alone. Recovery Elevator is right here with you every step of the way.

A recent study of baboons revealed that establishing robust social connections in adulthood, is so beneficial to the animals that it can mitigate the consequences of traumatic experiences during their early years. There's that word again. Connection. In addition, researchers have found that once these connections are made, the baboons report living longer lives.

We have learned, are learning - that building connections helps us depart from alcohol. When we first enter an actual relationship with the molecule alcohol. It's a wonderful courtship, but we soon realize that alcohol gave us wings, and then took away the sky. We must replace the connection we had with alcohol with something else.

[09:39] Kris introduces Kathy:

Kathy just celebrated 7 years of recovery. She lives in Dillworth, MN, she works in care coordination with the F5 Project and has five children ranging from 5 to 18. For fun she hangs out with recovery friends while doing a variety of activities.

Kathy's parents were both addicts and she was in the foster care system early in life. She would spend her childhood moving in and out of foster homes. When she was 12 she ended up living with her brothers and stepfather because her mother went to jail. Kathy wanted to be like her older brothers and started drinking to have a good time.

It didn't take long for her drinking and drug abuse to get out of control. Kathy ended up getting pregnant at age 16 by a man she didn't know well. She says she no longer had parental support. She quit all substances through her pregnancy and had a goal to be a different mom than her own. She was unable to stay quit and felt a lot of guilt and shame surrounding it.

Kathy was not able to stay clean during her second pregnancy and after having the baby she spent a lot of time stealing to support her habit and her children. She ended up trying rehab at one point but was unable to stay sober for very long.

Kathy feels she didn't have great parenting skills and ended up losing custody of her children due to the drug abuse. Some felonies found her in jail and she tried to use this as an opportunity to get clean. After losing a close friend, Kathy asked her stepfather to bail her out. After about two months of using again she decided to get clean because that is what her friend would have wanted for her.

She was able to get into inpatient treatment and felt this time that she was truly ready. As soon as she arrived, she went to a drum ceremony where she felt her spirit being awoken. She started learning about how her trauma affected her which helped her shed her shame. After treatment Kathy lived in a halfway house for a few months and upon getting out had her third child.

Kathy started going to school for social work and was able foster her nieces who she has now adopted. She loves her current job as care coordinator and giving back to others.

Kathy's plan in sobriety moving forward: to keep on giving back, anywhere and everywhere.

Kathy's parting piece of guidance: You have control over your actions, and you can train your brain to be and do better.

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It all starts from the inside out.

I love you guys.

RE 439: Developing a Spiritual Practice Jul 17, 2023

Show notes

Today we have Liz, she's 38 from LaVale, MD and took her last drink on December 31st, 2022.

Today's Sponsor: Café RE Use the promo code CONNECT for one free month in the alcohol-free community Café RE.

[02:22] Highlights from Paul:

This is not a religious podcast. Paul feels that religion and spirituality are not two sides of the same coin.

When we drink alcohol, spiritually, our electrical current to the universe is severed. In fact, in many cultures, the name alcohol literally means, soul sucking spirit. Then mentally, the chemical alcohol turns our brains into tepid soup. After that, we have the physical component - pancreatitis and liver failure come to mind.

What is spirituality? What is a spiritual practice? We are connecting with the self. We are connecting within. You become more ocean and less wave. In short, spirituality is connection with the self, which then leads to a connection with nature, the universe, a higher power, and some may call it God. Why do we drink? Why did we drink? To get this sense of connection.

Paul shares many examples of spiritual practices and reminds us that we don't have to wait for the normal order of healing in order to implement some these. We can start right now.

[11:03] Paul introduces Liz:

Liz is from a small-town Maryland. She is married with two kids; she is a registered nurse and attending school as she is working toward her master's degree. She enjoys spending time outdoors: kayaking, hiking, camping, being a soccer mom.

Liz grew up in a tightknit family and was the youngest of three sisters. She first tried alcohol with a cousin when she was in 6th grade. She didn't really enjoy it and thought it tasted terrible. She wasn't a big drinker in high school, just the occasional party.

She drank like everyone else during college and worked in the service industry. It was normal for her to be the last person drinking at parties, but she worked and went to school with little issue.

Liz's drinking escalated when she began nursing school. She was already married with two kids and struggled balancing it all. She used alcohol as a stress reliever. Her first job after graduating was in the ICU working night shifts. She would drink after her shifts and tried to hide the amount of drinking from her husband. She still didn't feel she had a problem. Liz says her moderation attempts found her feeling more stressed and caused mood swings.

Liz went to inpatient rehab and was able to stay sober for six months. She started attending AA and using the tools she learned in rehab. Her relapse happened on a soccer trip after another parent called her out for not drinking which triggered her. She now feels that her lack of planning or having a network contributed to the relapse as well. She lost control of her drinking. Over the next few years, she spent a lot of time in treatment and trying to figure out what was causing the issues and what needed to change.

Liz got a sponsor with AA and started the steps right away after her last drink. She sometimes gets cravings but plays the tape forward. She knows that if she drinks, she will not be able to be there for any of her family if they need her. Liz made a post on Facebook about her recovery and received a lot of love and many messages from people regarding their own struggles. Liz says that she feels so much freedom now that she is alcohol free and has found her higher power.

Liz's favorite resources in recovery: AA, recovery podcasts

Liz's parting piece of guidance: don't ever give up, no matter what happens you can wake up the next day and keep going.

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Sobriety Tracker iTunes

Recovery Elevator

Go big, because eventually we all go home.

I love you guys.