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Raised Resilient: Help Your Highly Sensitive Child — Kids & Family
Raised Resilient: Help Your Highly Sensitive Child

Parenting is the hardest job ever – and parenting a highly sensitive child who’s struggling can feel downright impossible.

If you’re suffering through endless meltdowns, walking on eggshells to avoid your child’s huge emotions, and losing sleep worrying that you’re failing your child, you’ve landed in the right place.

I’m Dr. Hilary Mandzik – clinical psychologist, parenting specialist, and mom of 3. And I’m here to help you feel GOOD about parenting your highly sensitive child.

Join me each week on the Raised Resilient podcast as we explore the topics parents worry about most when it comes to raising highly sensitive kids: managing meltdowns, building emotion regulation, understanding highly sensitive kids, making sense of challenging behaviors, building self-esteem, finding parenting strategies that actually work *with* your child’s sensitivity … and everything in between.

I’ll help you understand your child’s behavior (and your reactions to it!) so that even the reall…

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Latest Episodes:

How to Help a Child with Anxiety: Strategies for Building Resilience May 25, 2022

Show notes

It can be so tough to know how to support our kids when they’re feeling anxious. Sometimes we can start to feel anxious about their anxiety, and this can lead to everyone feeling even more anxious.

In this week’s episode, I answer a question from a listener whose 11-year-old daughter is struggling with anxiety about riding in the car. I explore why our children’s anxiety is tough for us as parents, and I provide tools, strategies, and new ways of thinking about anxiety to help us support our kids.

Understanding what’s really happening when our kids feel anxious and allowing space for the anxiety to exist is key if we want to wire our kids for resilience, even when anxiety shows up.

FREE Mindset Shifts to Transform Your Parenting: https://www.raisedresilient.com/mindset

Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/raisedresilient/

How to Deal with Your Child’s Frustration: 6 Tips to Build Frustration Tolerance May 18, 2022

Show notes

As parents, we all want to help our kids build frustration tolerance. It can be so tough – for us and for them! – when our kids shut down before they even give something a chance. But sometimes the things we do to try to help our children tolerate frustration better only make things harder. (Frustrating, right?)

In this week’s episode, I share why it’s so, so normal for kids to get frustrated easily – and I give you six actionable tips to help you support your child in learning to tolerate frustrating moments a little better!

Allowing space for frustration and approaching tough moments with curiosity & patience is key to growing your child’s ability to tolerate frustration. And this week’s episode will help you do just that!

FREE Mindset Shifts to Transform Your Parenting: https://www.raisedresilient.com/mindset

Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/raisedresilient/

“Shepherding Through”: How to Handle Meltdowns When Life Gets in the Way May 11, 2022

Show notes

If we want to help our children develop emotion regulation, allowing them to express their feelings is key. But what do you do when you have to be somewhere, but your child is having a tantrum? Or what about when you have multiple kids who all need you at once – like when your toddler is crying, but your baby needs a diaper change? How do you meet your child’s emotional needs in those moments?

In this week’s episode, I’m answering a listener who wrote in asking exactly this. I talk about how to show up for our kids in their hard moments while still getting to our appointments on time & meeting everyone’s needs (including our own!). I dive into why these moments are so hard & share my step-by-step “shepherding through” process.

Here’s the thing: The world can’t stop every time your child has a feeling. Sometimes life gets in the way, and you’ll have to hold space for the feeling while also moving on to wherever you need to be next. And that’s okay! The key is doing this in a way that builds emotion regulation & connection … which you’ll be able to do after listening to today’s episode!

FREE Mindset Shifts to Transform Your Parenting: https://www.raisedresilient.com/mindset

Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/raisedresilient/

Expert Tips On How To Deal With Your Child’s Aggressive Behaviors May 04, 2022

Show notes

Dealing with hitting, kicking, biting, pushing, scratching, spitting, and other aggressive behaviors in our children is one of the hardest parts of parenting. If you struggle in these moments, you’re so not alone! Aggressive behaviors during tantrums and meltdowns can be SO triggering and tricky.

In this week’s episode, I dive into why these aggressive behaviors happen, why they’re SO hard on us as parents, and how we can effectively and lovingly deal with these behaviors so that hopefully they happen less over time.

Here’s the thing: Aggressive behaviors – as tough as they are to deal with – are a normal part of healthy child development. And if we want these behaviors to happen less often, we need the tools, strategies, and perspective to show up with confidence and calm … which will make these tough moments feel lighter for everyone involved!

FREE Mindset Shifts to Transform Your Parenting: https://www.raisedresilient.com/mindset

Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/raisedresilient/

Praising Children: How to Praise Your Child in a Healthy, Confidence-Building Way (& What to Avoid!) Apr 27, 2022

Show notes

Most of us grew up hearing “good job” or “I’m proud of you” when we did things that pleased our parents. And because we grew up hearing these things, it probably comes naturally to say them to our own kids – which seems innocent enough, right?

In today’s episode, I explore the effects of different ways of praising our kids – and I talk about which ones build REAL confidence (and which ones leave our kids hungry for more, constantly seeking approval from others).

We all love our kids, and it’s natural to want to tell them how amazing they are. And when we can do this in a way that’s about THEIR process versus OUR expectations, we can praise our kids while also allowing them to grow REAL, inside-out, deep-down confidence … which is key to raising empowered and resilient children!

FREE Mindset Shifts to Transform Your Parenting: https://www.raisedresilient.com/mindset

Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/raisedresilient/

Emotion Regulation for Kids: 4 Reasons Validating Your Child’s Feelings Isn’t Working (& What to do Instead!) Apr 20, 2022

Show notes

Have you ever sat with your child in a tough moment and said ALL the “right” things … but your child only seems to get more & more upset? It can be SO hard! I’ve been there, too.

In this week’s episode, I talk about what our kids need MOST from us in difficult moments & explore four common mistakes we make when trying to validate our children’s feelings – complete with real life examples to help you do things differently!

Here’s the thing: In order to truly validate your child’s feelings, you have to first access genuine empathy for their struggle, no matter how trivial it might seem. When you can do that, the rest will follow; your child will feel seen & safe to show up exactly as they are, which builds confidence, resilience, and emotion regulation.

FREE Mindset Shifts to Transform Your Parenting: https://www.raisedresilient.com/mindset

Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/raisedresilient/

Respectful Parenting Isn’t Permissive Parenting: How to Set Healthy, Effective Boundaries That Will Set Your Child Up for Success Apr 13, 2022

Show notes

One of the most common misconceptions about parenting in a way that allows children to express all feelings is that kids basically get to do whatever they want. But that could not be further from the truth; allowing all feelings never means allowing all behaviors! The truth is that boundaries are essential in parenting … but actually setting them can be exhausting! If you’ve ever asked your child repeatedly to stop jumping on the couch only to have them ignore you, you know what I’m talking about; the struggle is real.

If setting boundaries with your child feels frustrating, this week’s episode is for you. I’ll empower you with answers to questions like: What is a boundary (and what isn’t)? Why are boundaries necessary? Which common boundary-setting mistakes might you be making? And if boundaries are so important, WHY do our kids push back on them so much?

Setting healthy, effective boundaries is essential to raising healthy kids. And after today’s episode, you’ll know how to do this in a way that feels good for you and your child, which is a game changer. You’ve got this!

FREE Mindset Shifts to Transform Your Parenting: https://www.raisedresilient.com/mindset

Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/raisedresilient/

Parent’s Responsibility: What Do Our Kids ACTUALLY Need From Us? (& 3 Things They Don’t Need!) Apr 06, 2022

Show notes

I talk a lot about how our children’s behaviors are actually a window into what’s going on for them “under the surface”; their behaviors communicate skills that they haven’t yet developed, impulses they can’t yet control, and sometimes needs that haven’t been met.

And that last one – the part about unmet needs – can be really triggering to think about as a parent! You might feel like it means you’re not doing your job or you’re not enough – but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Our kids have needs constantly, and we’ll never meet them perfectly. But having a “roadmap” of the possible things your child might be needing when behavior goes downhill can be a game changer.

In today’s episode, I share this roadmap with you so that you can feel empowered to decode even the trickiest behaviors by considering whether your child might need something from you in that moment. (And I’ll also share 3 things our kids DON’T need & that you can let go of today!)

Being a parent comes with SO MUCH pressure to do what’s best for our kids. It’s easy to get stuck in a tornado of worry over whether we’re really meeting their needs – but with this roadmap, you can feel empowered to focus on the things that really matter … and let go of the rest!

Instagram @raisedresilient

Learning to Say Sorry: Why You Shouldn’t Force Your Kids to Apologize (& What to Do Instead!) Mar 30, 2022

Show notes

Most of us grew up being told to “say sorry!” if we did something wrong. And maybe we learned to say the words … but I would argue that in saying these words, we didn’t actually feel remorse or learn how to repair our mistakes in any real way.

In this episode, I share why I don’t force my kids to apologize (& why I recommend you don’t, either). I explore the downsides of forcing apologies, and I share what we should do instead.

Allowing children the space to feel & act on genuine remorse is the key to teaching them healthy repair – a skill they’ll need in every single relationship they’re a part of for the rest of their lives!

FREE Mindset Shifts to Transform Your Parenting: https://www.raisedresilient.com/mindset

Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/raisedresilient/

”Sitting With Big Feelings”: What It Really Means & How It Builds Emotion Regulation Mar 23, 2022

Show notes

One of the most important jobs we have as parents is helping our children learn to regulate their emotions ... but HOW do we actually do this? The answer seems so simple: We do this by allowing ALL of our children’s feelings to exist in our safe presence. But what does that actually mean? What does it look like in practice?

In today’s episode, I unpack the phrase “allowing space for feelings” & share real life examples to help you understand what it REALLY looks like to sit with your child’s big feelings. Because doing this consistently is the SINGLE BEST THING we can do to help our kids learn to regulate their own emotions!

If we want to raise resilient kids, it’s KEY to help them understand that they’re capable of tolerating and moving through even the most uncomfortable feelings – so encourage your child to share their feelings with you, and sit with them in their discomfort. You’ve got this!

FREE Mindset Shifts to Transform Your Parenting: https://www.raisedresilient.com/mindset

Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/raisedresilient/

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