Stay ConnectedProxy investigates the emotional mysteries that run our lives and world — sometimes by finding someone who gets it, sometimes by reporting from the emotions beat. Hosted by Yowei Shaw, former co-host and editorial lead of Invisibilia.
Follow the show so you don’t miss the next case.
Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishaw
Get in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com
If you’re new, try: Bisexual Wife Guy, Yowei Can’t Speak Bro, or Jane Doesn’t Like Her Dogs.
Copyright: © 839140
The case of the bandmates who can't finish their record and don't know why.
Evan and Chris are best friends, bandmates, and creative partners. Years ago, their band The Superweaks was on the verge of breaking out. Then Evan's brother Corey — the band's bassist — died suddenly, and the band never recovered.
Now they have a record that's almost done. Just a few vocals left. But it's been stuck for years, tangled in grief, burnout, ADHD, resentment, lack of leadership, and silence.
In this episode, Yowei connects Evan and Chris with Ryan Dusick, founding drummer of Maroon 5 turned therapist, to investigate what happens when a band is also a friendship, a dream, a workplace, and a family system — and what it takes to get unstuck.
From the episode:
— The Superweaks — listen to their single "Blindside" and The Superweaks Superweekly Supercast episode where Yowei stumbles into the case — on Instagram @thesuperweaks
— Ryan Dusick — author of Harder to Breathe: A Memoir of Making Maroon, Losing It All, and Finding Recovery, and host of The Harder To Breathe podcast — on Instagram @ryan_michael_dusick
— The Music Industry Therapist Collective:www.musicindustrytherapists.com
New to Proxy?Try Bisexual Wife Guy for a classic case, or Yowei Can't Speak Bro for another story about friendship and miscommunication.
For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get File Under Feelings, our free newsletter, at proxyhq.org.
Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏
Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishaw
Visit — proxypodcast.com
Get in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com
The case of the introvert who keeps waiting for personality puberty to hit.
For most of her life, Yowei saw her introversion as a character flaw to fix. Then Yowei read Unreliable Narrator by comedian Aparna Nancherla and realized she wasn't the only one who felt this way.
In this episode, Yowei talks introvert-to-introvert with Aparna about self-loathing, performance, the extrovert ideal, Asian woman stereotypes, why “be yourself” is terrible advice, and how to take up space without trying to become someone else.
From the episode:
— Aparna Nancherla, author of Unreliable Narrator: Me, Myself, and Imposter Syndrome — on Instagram @aparnapkin: www.aparnacomedy.com
— Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talkingby Susan Cain
New to Proxy? Try Bisexual Wife Guy for a classic case, or Yowei Can't Speak Brofor a story where Yowei tries to understand the terrifying emotional language known as bro-speak.
For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.
Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏
Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishaw
Visit — proxypodcast.com
Get in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com
The case of the man who can't stop regretting the life he didn’t choose.
Mic Nguyen was supposed to be a doctor. Becoming a doctor meant stability, respect, and making his parents proud.
Instead, Mic became a comedian and advertising creative. He loves his life. But whenever money feels tight or work feels uncertain, the old question comes back: did he mess up by not going to medical school?
In this episode, Yowei connects Mic with regret researcher Amy Summerville to investigate why regret hurts, why our imagined alternate lives can feel so real, and how regret can point less to what we did wrong than to what we still care about.
From the episode:
— Mic Nguyen — co-host of the podcast Asian Not Asian — on Instagram @nicepantsbro
— Amy Summerville's paper — one of the most cited articles on regret
New to Proxy? Try Bisexual Wife Guy for a classic case, or Caitlin Lost the Voice In Her Head for another story about trying to live with the person you turned out to be.
For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.
Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏
Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishaw
Visit — proxypodcast.com
Get in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com
The case of the bisexual wife guy who got dumped.
George was married to a woman he loved. Then she came out as bisexual and left the marriage. George is happy for her. But he's also heartbroken, confused, and stuck with questions he doesn’t feel allowed to ask.
In this episode, Yowei connects George with Hanna Rosin, who has lived a version of this story from the other side. Together, they investigate late-in-life queerness, divorce, closure, performative okayness, and how to move forward when you feel like a minor character written out of someone else’s story.
From the episode:
— Hanna Rosin, host of the podcasts Radio Atlantic and Chutzpod! — on X and Instagram: @hannarosin
New to Proxy? Try Mic Chooses the Wrong Lifefor a story about when the road not taken won’t leave you alone, or Yowei Can't Speak Bro for a story about loving someone whose language of connection doesn’t make sense to you.
For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.
Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏
Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishaw
Visit — proxypodcast.com
Get in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com
The case of the couple who want answers from HR.
Months after Elliot was laid off, he and his husband Miles were still angry — not just about the layoff, but about the way it happened. The smiling HR rep. The severance paperwork no one explained. The desk he wasn’t allowed to pack up. The coffee spilled all over his belongings.
They had questions they couldn’t ask the actual HR person without risking Miles’s job. So Yowei found them a proxy: Catie Maillard, a veteran People Operations professional who has conducted hundreds of layoffs and been laid off herself.
In Proxy’s first-ever proxy conversation, Miles and Elliot ask Catie everything they’ve been carrying about HR, severance, corporate policy, layoff lists, the WARN Act, and why companies can make people feel so disposable. And Catie helps them understand what may have happened behind the scenes — while also giving Elliot something he never got from the company: a real apology.
From the episode:
— Catie Maillard —on LinkedIn— more about her work:www.somehowimanagehr.com
— Yowei's unhinged Gold Star music video
New to Proxy? Try Bisexual Wife Guy for a classic case, or Yowei Can’t Speak Brofor a lighter story about male friendship, bro-speak, and emotional translation.
For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.
Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏
Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishaw
Visit — proxypodcast.com
Get in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com
Please note: This story contains brief mention of suicidal ideation. If you or someone you know may be considering suicide, contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by dialing 9-8-8, or the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741.
After Elliot was suddenly laid off, his husband Miles kept working at the same company — in the same office, with the same HR rep, under the same threat that he might be next.
Then Miles heard a rumor: more layoffs were coming on the third Thursday of the month. Danger Day.
In this episode, Yowei follows Miles and Elliot through the horror-movie logic of layoff anxiety: calendar clues, changed meeting rooms, suspicious boss behavior, financial panic, phantom work limbs, and the feeling that one bad meeting can make your whole life disappear. With help from sociologist Ofer Sharone, they investigate why layoffs can feel so devastating — especially when you believed that working hard and following the rules would keep you safe.
From the episode:
— Ofer Sharone — sociologist at UMass Amherst, and author ofThe Stigma Trap: College-Educated, Experienced, and Long-Term Unemployed
New to Proxy? Try Bisexual Wife Guy for a classic case, or.HR by Proxy for the first full proxy conversation, where Miles and Elliot get to ask an HR rep the questions they've been carrying.
For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.
Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏
Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishaw
Visit — proxypodcast.com
Get in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com
When Yowei got laid off from NPR, she knew all the rational things. It was a business decision. It wasn’t about her performance. She had savings, severance, and support.
So why did it still feel like getting rejected by the entire life she’d built?
In the first episode of Proxy, Yowei investigates why layoffs can feel so emotionally devastating — even when you know, intellectually, that it’s not your fault. Along the way, she talks with experts about the history of layoffs, unemployment stigma, the American hiring process, and why losing a job can make you feel like you’ve lost your worth. And she begins the story that eventually became Proxy itself.
From the episode:
— Ofer Sharone — sociologist at UMass Amherst, and author ofThe Stigma Trap: College-Educated, Experienced, and Long-Term Unemployed
New to Proxy? Try Bisexual Wife Guy for a classic Proxy case, or.HR by Proxy, for the first full proxy converstion we ever recorded.
For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.
Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏
Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishaw
Visit — proxypodcast.com
Get in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com
It’s the knot you can’t untangle — a problem so specific, it makes you feel alone. But what if you could talk to someone who gets it?
On Proxy, we find someone with the closest possible experience to your problem — and follow the conversation that unfolds. It’s not therapy. It’s emotional investigative journalism.
Hosted by Yowei Shaw, former co-host of Invisibilia.
New to Proxy? Try Bisexual Wife Guy, one of the clearest examples of what this show does, or Yowei Can't Speak Bro for a funny investigation into male friendship, bro-speak, and emotional translation.
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